Chapter Text
Dean sat in the kitchen with Bobby, having a beer and watching his Uncle cook dinner.
“What’re you cooking, it smells good,” Dean asked, sipping at his beer and resting his elbow on the table.
“Beef stew,” Bobby replied with a small smile as he glanced over at Dean sat at the table, “Where’s Sam?”
“Oh he’s coming over later, he had to go do something, was being all secretive about it, told me to go on ahead of him with this little smirk on his face,” Dean said with a small shrug.
“Was he now?” Bobby said with a raised eyebrow, stirring the stew a little and glancing up towards the ceiling as he heard footsteps upstairs.
“Who's that?”
Bobby opened his mouth to reply when Crowley’s voice came floating down the stairs, “Bobby darling what is that glorious smell coming from the kitchen?”
“Darling? you got yourself a woman?” Dean smirked.
“Dean does that sound like a woman to you?” Bobby replied gruffly before a wide beam broke out on his face at the sight of Crowley coming around the corner.
“Well she sounds exotic- WHAT THE FUCK!?” Dean yelled, dropping his beer and falling out of his chair as he scrambled to try and get a gun or something.
“I thought Moose said they weren’t coming over until later,” Crowley said with a small pout as he moved across the room and pressed a kiss to Bobby’s cheek.
“Dean, put the fucking gun down,” Bobby muttered, rolling his eyes while he blushed a little and smiled still at Crowley’s lips being pressed to his cheek.
“What the fuck have you done to Bobby?!” Dean yelled, refusing to lower the gun as he stared open mouthed at Crowley stood there, draping his arm around his uncle and kissing his cheek… the demon was even wearing a little white apron with flowers on it and had a duster in his hand.
“Dean we’re-” Bobby started before Crowley butt in and spoke over him.
“We’re lovers squirrel,” he purred, resting his chin on Bobby’s shoulder and looping his arm through the human’s.
“Get offa me Crowls, stop torturing the poor boy, you’re not usually this clingy,” Bobby muttered, trying to hide a smile as he gently pushed against his head, barely even making any effort to get the demon away from him.
Dean just stood there, his mouth opening and closing like a goldfish as he tried to make sense of what was going in in front of him before he threw the gun down on the floor and stormed across the room to get another beer.
“You two had better explain what’s fucking going on here right now or I’m finding the colt and unloading it into Crowley’s skull,” he growled, popping the cap off his bottle and raising it to take a swig before nodding towards the mess on the floor, “I’ll clean that up later.”
Crowley just started to laugh, a smile on his face like he was the cat that got the cream as he loosened his grip on Bobby’s arm but didn’t quite let go, instead just resting his hand around where his elbow was.
“I don’t see what explaining there is to do, I told you straight, we’re lovers Dean. We’re together,” Crowley replied as if it were a thing easily understood- which it should be… but this was Dean.
“How did this happen?” Dean replied in a demanding voice, “Who else knows?”
And on that note Sam made his entrance with Castiel in tow, “Hey guys! Everything okay? Dean’s not shot either of you? Good!” he said, walking across the room and putting his hand on his brother’s shoulder, “They break the news to you then?” he asked with a wide grin, knowing how uncomfortable Dean probably was with this already being as insecure as he was about his own sexuality.
“You knew?!” Dean cried out in a higher pitched voice than usual before looking to Cas, “and I take it you knew too by your lack of any sort of reaction to seeing Crowley here.”
“Dean I was the first to find out,” Castiel replied with a small frown, “Sam why is Dean even this surprised?”
“BECAUSE THEY’RE STRAIGHT!” Dean yelled, waving his hands at the two of them, spilling a little beer on the floor and down himself.
“Actually after about three hundred and fifty years you kind of stop caring about labels,” Crowley replied with a small shrug.
“I guess I’m just bi these days,” Bobby said with a small chuckle, pressing a kiss to Crowley’s cheek before turning to check on the food, “Well that’s the food ready… Crowley would you go get some bowls out- Cas do you want any?”
“No I do not need to eat it would only be pointless for me to consume any of it,” he replied with a frown spread over his face as he watched Dean stand there open mouthed in shock at what was going on- the man seemed to have been practically catatonic since his last outburst and it was starting to worry Castiel just a little bit that the man would react like this.
“Haven't changed at all have you wings?” Crowley said with a chuckle, moving around the angel to get the bowls from the cupboard.
“Are you just gonna stand there Dean or are you gonna sit yerself down to eat what I’ve just cooked for you?”
Dean swallowed hard as Sam started to laugh at him again; pulling his chair out he nearly slipped on the beer from earlier before sitting himself down.
“Dean! I can clean that up for you!” Castiel immediately offered with more emotion than usual from the sight of seeing him nearly fall and break his neck.
“No, Dean made the mess so he can clean it up,” Crowley replied like he was talking to a young child, “You don’t have to do everything for him lover boy, he’s got to grow up at some point.”
“Now Crowley, you know Cas would do anything for Dean,” Sam said with the smuggest look on his face as he pulled his chair out at the table.
“So you accept this?” Dean whispered disbelievingly, “What the everlovingfuck is going on this has got to be some sort of nightmare.”
“Well you’re gonna have to accept it bro because this is real life,” Sam shot back at him, sipping at a beer that Crowley passed to him.
“Sam! This is our Uncle. And the King of Hell.”
“Shush Dean, they’re in love, that kind of stuff doesn’t matter.”
“CAS WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THIS?” Dean cried out desperately, almost tearing his hair out as he turned to the Angel stood beside him now.
“I don’t believe my opinion on the matter is important Dean, this is Bobby’s-”
“OF COURSE YOUR OPINION IS IMPORTANT!”
“I do not believe it is my place to interfere when people care for each other Dean,” the Angel said, his eyes flickering towards the man as he said the last few words.
“Crowley is obviously up to something!” he yelled, slamming his fist down on the table as Bobby put a bowl of stew in front of him.
“Be careful boy or there’ll be no stew left for you.”
“Of course I’m up to something,” Crowley said with a chuckle, moving closer to Dean and whispering into his ear, "I’m going to propose.”
Dean started to choke on the beer that he’d been sipping and about had a heart attack before he nearly fell out of his chair again.
“Stop it Crowley you’ll kill the boy,” Bobby muttered, a red flush spread over his cheeks as he finished setting the bowls of stew out on the table.
“Well they did legalise gay marriage not long ago so it’s totally a possibility,” Sam chimed in from across the table, already starting to dig into his food.
“Dammit Sam, shut up,” Dean growled, trying to kick his brother under the table and finding his leg wasn’t quite long enough to do much more than just nudge his shin with his toes.
“What’s wrong Dean? Can’t reach?” Sam teased, sipping at his beer and eating some of the stew.
“He’s just having a very slow mental breakdown,” Crowley replied, leaning over bobby’s shoulder and pressing a kiss to his cheek, at which point Dean let out a small scream and leapt to his feet, “STOP IT! Cas make them stop! Why are you okay with this Cas!?”
“I’m totally indifferent to sexual orientation…” Cas replied trailing off as Dean started flailing to make it clear he wanted to speak.
“That’s not what I meant Cas!”
“That seemed to be what your problem was with-”
“No! I mean… Crowley… King of Hell… Bobby… my uncle! Like… Cas how can you be okay with that.”
“It is not my place to judge anyone’s love Dean.”
“You’re an Angel of course you can judge!” Dean yelled, putting his beer down before he waved his arms this time.
“It’s not like I hurt Bobby...in any way he doesn't like,” Crowley chipped in with a shit-eating grin spread over his face.
“OH. MY FUCKING. GO-”
“Dean please,” Castiel interrupted, “Do not use my father’s name in vain.”
Bobby just rolled his eyes at the others and finished up his stew, “Crowley are you trying to kill Dean?” he asked, his face totally red now while Sam just laughed and laughed at the other side of the table.
“Of course not, I wouldn’t try and kill him, I want to stay in your good books, don’t I love?” he said, flashing the man a sweet sweet smile and fluttering his eyelashes a little jokingly.
“Crowley.” Bobby said warning tone in his voice, before whispering in the demon’s ear, “I will cuff you down and have you beg for mercy tonight if you carry on.”
“Bobby you’re only going to encourage me by saying that, anyway you’d never be able to do that,” Crowley purred before leaning up and pressing a kiss to his cheek.
“You're killing dean" Sam muttered, nearly choking on his own beer as he tried not to laugh out loud at the horrified, pale look on his brother’s face. He hadn’t seen him looking this ghost-like since… well he couldn’t quite remember.
“Put a fucking stop to this already guys!” his brother quickly choked out, slamming his fist down on the table and getting to his feet.
“Dean please calm down…”
“No I can’t calm down… this.. .this has gone too far… please just tell me this is… this is one big joke or I’ll… I’ll-” before Dean could continue speaking the Angel had let out a heavy sigh and pressed two fingers to his forehead, putting him to sleep and gently helping the now unconscious Dean back into his chair.
“I think Dean needs a little time out…” Castiel murmured, giving the rest of the room a weak smile, “He might feel better about all this in the morning?”