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Maybe it’s because they spent a lot of time with uncle Shepard when they grew up, but Liara’s kids are a lot more outgoing than their mother. Instead of staying back to observe they just do things. Having them around is an accident waiting to happen, and unlike Kaidan Shepard still loves the challenge. He’s out there in the garden, running around and laughing and teaching the kids more about military strategy than anyone their age should know. Even though he’s probably a little too old and a little too tired it doesn’t show; he’s as playful as ever.
Liara has always been the calm type of person. Even her anger is calm, and Kaidan’s not even sure how that works. He’s always liked that about her, though. It’s very soothing to have conversations with her.
She’ll come visit Vancouver every second week, like clockwork. It’s nothing they planned; it just kind of happened. Sometimes she’ll bring the kids, and sometimes she’ll be in a hurry and barely have time to stay for dinner. But no matter how short the visit, it’s enough. When she leaves Shepard will have this spark in his eyes, he’ll look a little younger. There’ll be a spring in his step that’s usually not there. It’s not that his life with Kaidan isn’t enough; it’s just that Shepard was never meant to settle down completely. Part of him will always feel the need to be out there, even though he’s reached the point where it isn’t possible anymore.
And here they are again. It’s the first time in several months that she’s brought the kids, and Shepard is outside playing. Liara seems happy, but tired, and she’s talking about work. About the state of the galaxy and all those things that used to matter, and yeah, it still matters, it’s just that most of the old squad retired from that life years ago. Kaidan sips his tea and offers advice he knows she won’t listen to. So much have changed in the past couple of years and he hasn’t been keeping up with it all.
They talk about headaches and biotics and good ways to get kids interested in archeology. They talk about how Shepard has managed to mess up way too many bones in his body through the years, and how he’ll probably have to go through another surgery soon. At least that’s what the doctors say. Shepard says he wants a cane instead, because it’s the perfect combination of badass and oldschool.
Liara shows him a list of alien plants that could survive in their garden – and that probably wouldn’t end up murdering Earth in one way or another – and he’s still not sure if she can blush, but it really looks like it when she admits Javik helped making the list.
They always have a lot to talk about, so it takes a while for them to realize that something has changed. Usually Shepard will play loud games. The ones that involve running around screaming, or telling stories with a lot of explosions and other sound-effects. This time it’s different. He’s stopped running around and is seated on the ground, one kid in his lap and the other at his side. He’s speaking quietly, only a soft murmur reaching the veranda.
Liara keeps on talking until she notices that Kaidan isn’t paying attention anymore. Following his gaze she too falls silent, now too focused on Shepard’s story to finish her own.
It’s at times like these Kaidan wishes he was a painter. Instead of a photo taken with an omni-tool he wants a canvas and hundreds of colours. He wants to work for hours to get the sunset right; how the golden light envelopes the three figures. He wants to capture the story itself, capture Shepard’s voice in the strokes of a brush.
Neither of them can actually hear what Shepard is saying, he could be telling fart-jokes. Actually, had he not started humming a tune Kaidan would’ve just assumed that was the case.
Shepard’s no singer – his relationship with music is about as stable as his relationship with Harbinger – and usually he’ll sing as out of tune as possible in order to make people laugh. This time he’s surprisingly sincere though, and the song brings back so many memories. Kaidan remembers smiling several days in a row and the fabric of dress blues beneath his fingertips. He remembers saying “I do” and kissing for way too long and how he didn’t care the slightest. He remembers being absolutely terrified when stepping out on the dance-floor and how they held on to each-other, and what was meant to be a graceful dance kind of ended up with them swaying awkwardly. Even Miranda said the wedding was perfect and instantly got a “you should know” reply from Jack. It was the best day of Kaidan’s life, the way every day with Shepard is.
And the oldest kid is up dancing, barefoot in the grass with the sunset framing her tiny, blue form. She’s smiling and twirling, trying to get her sister to join her. Kaidan turns to Liara only to instantly forget what he was going to say. Her heartwarming smile is a mirror of his own, and he realizes that there’s no need to talk.
When he turns back Shepard isn’t on the ground anymore. He’s up on his feet, having a little trouble keeping his balance but refusing to sit down again, stubborn as always. These days there are so many more reasons for his dancing to be awkward, stiff joints and all, but there’s something very genuine about how he’s holding the hands of the girls and moving along to the humming. They’re moving in a circle, and when Shepard ends up facing the house he looks up at Kaidan and winks in an absolutely exaggerated way. The girls instantly turn to look at the veranda, one of them wide-eyed and the other giggling.
As Kaidan gets up from the table to join them he remembers a much younger Shepard at his side and how they walked through the crowd just like this. It was kind of like running at the beam; they needed the same determination to make it to their first dance. He remembers leaning in and asking if it would be worth it, and how Shepard had been unusually quiet in response. Now, with a tiny, blue hand disappearing in his grip to the left, and Shepard stroking the back of his right hand, the answer is obvious. It’s a mess of stumbling around, laughing and singing – and Shepard talking about how wedding cakes need lots of whipped cream so you can easily smear them on your partners face – and it’s everything Kaidan dreamed of back then. Back when they were listening to endless playlists to decide what song they identified with the most. It seems like a lifetime ago, and by now it almost is. But this is what he fought like hell for, and this is what will keep him going to the end.