Chapter Text
JUNE
There’s a rule in villainy. If you have to go out, do it with a bang. And when you come back, do it with a bigger one. Well I swear I heard the cry of “Agent Todd is back!” across town, so I think I did okay.
I prop my feet up on my desk, a mug of tea in my hands, and a satisfied grin on my face. Although…
Now that I’m thinking, reflecting on my (all of one year) at Odd Squad, on Scribbles and her new partner (who, quite honestly, looks like an idiot) I can’t stop reminiscing on how exactly how I got here. Some might say it’s fate, some might say unfortunate circumstances. Me personally? I call it that fucking traitor, Oprah.
Oh, she wasn’t all bad. But if I could go back in time and open my own ears to the truth earlier, I’d do it in a god-damn heartbeat.
~
We both looked way different back then. As did Scribbles. Her and I, and some other recruits, were in HQ for a tour the day it all began, and Scribbles, clumsy as ever, almost got ran over by some gigantic machine rolling through the bullpen. And then of course, I heard the words. The words I’d never forget for the rest of my days. The words that still haunt me now.
“Watch out recruit! Pienado, coming through!”
Because those words, the first words I ever heard from Oscar, set alight in me something that almost didn’t let me become a villain. Call it obsession, call it love, call it pretty boys being my weakness, those words, the boy who spoke them, almost stopped me from becoming a villain.
Thank god they didn’t though.
I joined odd squad. Quickly became the star agent, won every award, solved and loved every case, did everything right. Topped the board in every scenario. Hell, I even fell in love. And then… And then I got bored. Did everything I possibly could to con myself into believing that this was enough for me. Sure, my gadgets got a bit outlandish, and okay, so maybe once or twice I played the drums in the shower, but, really, the guitar is more my instrument.
And it still wasn’t enough. Why wasn’t it enough?
I started thinking, questioning the rules, testing their limits. Why eliminate oddness really? Why not live with it in harmony? Wouldn’t that be better, more interesting? What’s life without a little spice, after all. So I ran a little experiment. Blew off a case. Got it wrong, just to see what would happen. It was nothing major, just some dancing buildings, and it’s not like I was solving it any slower than a different pair of partners would.
But the way Oprah responded, you’d think I’d killed someone. Going off about how I ‘never got cases wrong’ and how I’d ‘deliberately caused oddness’ and how she ‘should have seen this coming.’ And that, that set it off for me. Odd Squad would never, never see me as ‘normal.’ All because I could do maths in my head, I was a freak, some kind of superhuman that was either a stellar ally, or a threat to be neutralised. ‘And really, how high could I rise in the ranks of Odd Squad.’ I reasoned. Sure, I could become the Big O, but where was the fun in that? Where was the oddness? But as a villain? There was a whole world of opportunities out there.
I handed in my badge.
And then I had to go. Before I did though, I went to see Oscar. And as I entered the lab to say goodbye, as I saw him bent over a gadget, screwdriver in hand, I cried. Sobbed. Took a minute to collect myself and even then I almost didn’t go in, because how the fuck was I supposed to say goodbye and then walk out, knowing the next time I saw him, I wouldn’t be the same.
I went in though, because just walking out without saying goodbye to the love of my life (wether or not he knew it) was unthinkable.
We both cried.
I left.
I spent a week or two re-calibrating. I'd been completely thrown off kilter. And then I decided that if I wanted to be a villain, I’d better fucking commit to it. So I did. Plotted my revenge, ever so meticulously. It took weeks of planning. I Snuck in one night to steal a gadget I made while still working there that would allow me to have any nose I wanted, in any colour. Yes, I was going to go out with a bang.
I had snuck in, and released the pienado. A blaring alarm announced my presence. That was okay. I was in. And I would cause as much chaos as I knew how to.
As the sirens had blared and the Pienado had done its work, I had waited, patient. Listened as the agents had scrambled for safety, yelling at each other as the alarm went off. And then, though the bug I’d placed on Scribbles earlier, I heard it.
“This is impossible!” Oscar had yelled. “The only way to open up that door is with my nose!”
“What?!” Scribbles had yelled back, incredulous.
“Well, I keep losing my keys, so I thought I’d make a nose shaped lock instead. Uh, but I’ve been with my nose all day so I-i dont know.”
Scribbles gasped. “Todd.”
I made my grand entrance. The doors hissed open. I cackled.
“Thats right. Oh Oscar! I’ve got your nose!” I’d called, and he’d reached up to check that it was still there like the dork he was. Oprah had demanded that I stop, but, that wasn’t going to happen. I was officially on my own. I knew the truth. Odd squad should be making the world more odd. When my half-hearted attempt to get Scribbles to see the truth didn’t work, I left, throwing pies at Ms. O and Oscar in the process. They go down like nine pins, even though the memory, even now, leaves a pang in my heart. I would never voluntarily hurt Oscar. But it was just pie. He would be, and is, fine.
~
I'm not entirely sure what happened after I left. I hear Scribbles took care of the pienado. I don’t care. Odd squad is not ready for what's about to happen next.