Chapter Text
When Vox died, he woke up in a dark alleyway, his vision staticy and blurred. His entire body felt different. It didn’t take him long to realize that was because it was different.
He scrambled through the streets of Hell, receiving pitying looks from the denizens as he tripped over his own feet in an attempt to make sense of what was happening to him.
Nobody bothered to talk to him. Nobody bothered to let him know where he was, what was happening, anything that would grant him some semblance of understanding regarding his situation.
Nobody but Alastor.
Vox’s mind was buzzing - both literally and figuratively. Static echoed through his ears and only seemed to intensify with his panic. His body didn’t feel like his. His arms were too long, legs too lanky, and head far too square.
As he bolted across the road, using his newfound stamina to his advantage, he found himself trapped in place.
Toothed shadows surrounded him, and the static sound got louder - but it wasn’t coming from his head anymore, it was coming from somewhere else.
His breaths were ragged as he frantically looked around. What the fuck was going on?
Suddenly a figure appeared behind him. A hand shot out and grasped Vox’s wrist, digging its claws in like it never wanted to let him go.
The static in his ears was almost deafening. Neon blue flashed across Vox’s line of sight and the hand fell off of his wrist. The smell of burnt hair perforated the air.
The shadows were gone. Vox whirled around and saw a formally-dressed man - or creature, were those antlers? - laying on the ground. The tips of his hair were singed black, as was his hand. Panic surged again. Did he just kill a man?
He kneeled down and frantically felt the man’s neck for a pulse, finding nothing but rough, cold skin. God, what had he done, he was going to go to jail for life. Vox had no clue how he’d done it, but he somehow electrocuted a man to death.
The man began to stir.
“Thank fuck you’re okay,” Vox breathed, rising to his feet.
A dangerous grin spread across the man’s face and his antlers began to elongate. “I wouldn’t be grateful for that if I were you. Were I dead, your future would look far, far brighter.”
“I’m sorry, what?” Vox frowned. “Are you threatening me?”
A laugh track sounded. “Oh, how naive! Of course I’m threatening you!” The man peered down at him - he must have been at least 7 feet tall, because he towered over Vox in a way that no-one had managed to before. “You don’t know who I am, do you?”
“Am I supposed to?”
The man held out his hand for Vox to shake. He eyed the outstretched appendage, not wanting to accidentally electrocute the guy again. Not to mention the claws that looked like they could easily tear through flesh. But he had a feeling that refusing the handshake would cause him more problems than what he was thinking, so he took his hand.
“My name is Alastor. Pleasure to be meeting you - quite the pleasure!”
“Vox. Pleasure to meet you, too - though I wish it were under better circumstances.”
“Ah, yes, well. Unfortunately, ‘better circumstances’ are rather hard to come by down here in hell.”
Vox blinked. “In Hell?”
“Why, yes, in Hell. Don’t tell me you’re surprised to be here? The criteria for getting into heaven is quite strict - according to the holy book, at least.”
“I’m surprised that I’m dead.” He had a feeling he would end up in hell rather than heaven - swindling elderly people out of their money had funded the majority of his start-up career in television before he made it as a big-time news reporter. He just hadn’t expected to end up in hell so soon.
“Yes, well, few people anticipate their deaths. Everyone thinks they’re invincible, that nothing could ever happen to them, until they wind up down here.”
“Speaking from experience?”
A static sound echoed through the air as Alastor’s smile widened. “Word of advice. Don’t ask people prying questions. It’s generally not appreciated.”
Vox swallowed. “Noted. Are you, uh, the welcome committee or something?”
“Ha!” Alastor’s smile returned to normal. “No. Quite the opposite, actually - I usually give newcomers quite the scare when I first encounter them.”
“What makes me different?”
“Simple. You managed to incapacitate me. Very few people can do that, you know - you should count yourself lucky. Were it not for your odd electric powers, you would have joined the countless damned souls in my possession that I torture on the daily.”
“Huh.” The fuck was he meant to say to that? “Interesting.”
Alastor slung his arm around Vox’s shoulders. “I think you and I are going to be pals.”
-
True to his word, they did end up becoming friends. Business partners, even - only when it was beneficial to Alastor, of course.
After he established his television company, he merged with two other startups with similar goals - to take advantage of the lack of modernization in hell. They formed ‘The Vees’, a group of like-minded entrepreneurs who, together, dominated the tech industry of Hell.
Velvette and Valentino - Vox’s co-CEOs - were great friends. They weren’t good people by any means - they were in Hell, after all - but neither was Vox. When he was around them, he could let his guard down and be who he truly was. Unlike with Alastor, around whom he had to think before he did anything out of fear of accidentally triggering the deer demon’s anger.
Then, as a sort of natural conclusion to their friendship, Velvette and Valentino began dating. They were Hell’s ultimate power couple after Lucifer and Lilith had split. And even though they were together, they always made sure that Vox felt included. When he was with them, he never felt like the third wheel - it was almost like he was part of their relationship.
But he had eyes for someone else.
Vox had always been attracted to power, and Alastor was the very image of domineering. Looking back, he was sure that his infatuation with the radio demon had sprouted the moment that he first threatened him when they met.
Alastor, unfortunately, had made it very clear to Vox that he worked alone.
He had never said anything, though, about living alone. Surely he wanted someone to share his life with? Someone to be by his side through all the trials and tribulations of being one of Hell’s top overlords? Someone like Vox?
Vox knew he was done for when Alastor placed his hand on his shoulder and said Vox was one of his closest companions.
He yearned to claim the number one spot in the radio demon’s life.
Velvette and Valentino weren’t fond of the deer demon in the slightest, taking care to avoid any interaction when Vox had them all over.
“Honestly, sweetheart, I have no clue what you see in him,” Valentino sighed. “If it’s the dick size, then let me assure you - height doesn’t equal length. Trust me, I know from experience.”
“It’s not his dick, it’s his personality.” Vox smiled stupidly. “The pure confidence he exudes, the quiet intelligence behind his eyes.. The way that he doesn’t hesitate to kill anyone who dares cross him.”
“Knowing he could end your life at a moment’s notice is a turn on for you?” Velvette chimed in. “Might want to see a doctor about that.”
“Oh, come on,” Vox scoffed, “you practically run Voxtagram - literally everyone shares the same opinion as me.”
“Yeah, for celebrity crushes, not actual crushes.”
“What the fuck is the difference?”
“A celebrity crush is something that could never happen. All sorts of fucked up things are fine when they’re fantasies. But an actual crush is when you genuinely want that shit to happen. That’s what’s not okay.”
“Oh, I don’t know, babe,” purred Valentino, “you know as well as I do that perfectly healthy people can want a little spice in the bedroom. Masochism isn’t just for the mentally ill.”
“I’m not a masochist!”
“See? He said it himself. Not a masochist, just a psycho.”
“Fuck both of you.”
“Time and place, baby, and I’ll arrange something.”
-
Despite Valentino and Velvette’s warnings, Vox’s crush on Alastor only intensified. When Alastor brought Vox into his mansion in the swamp, Vox finally decided to confess. Alastor was a pretty private dude - bringing someone home was no small thing to him.
He made a reservation in Cannibal Town at Alastor’s favourite restaurant. He said they were the only place that prepared their venison correctly.
“Now, Vox, you know I’m all too grateful for the opportunity to come out here and feast, but I think we both know that there’s something else on your mind,” Alastor said, beginning to eat his venison.
‘We both know’? Was Alastor aware of Vox’s massive crush on him? Even better, did he reciprocate? “Yeah, uh.. Yeah.”
“Very literate,” observed Alastor, leaning forward. “Care to share?”
Vox drew a breath. It was now or never. “So I’ve been wanting to talk to you about this for a while. I mean, it’s been on my mind practically since I met you.”
Alastor’s brow furrowed. “Go on.”
Vox fidgeted with his napkin. “I was wondering - did you maybe want to be, uh, partners? With me?”
Alastor laughed heartily, his smile relaxing. “Oh, was that it? Honestly, I thought you’d know this by now - I work alone. Sure, the occasion dalliance is fun and all, but having a business partner would only weigh me down. Our industries are competitors, as well - I must admit, it’s refreshing having a business rival to compete with! Why on earth would I muddy that up with a merger?”
“No, not - not partners like that, I meant -” Vox buried his face in his hands. “God this is embarrassing. I meant the other kind of partners.”
Alastor blinked. “I’m afraid I’m not quite sure what you’re getting at.”
“I’m asking you out. Like, romantically. Because I really fucking like you. I mean, you’re sexy as all hell, charming, dangerous - everything I like in a man - and if I’m not misreading things, I’d say you feel that way about me, too.”
Alastor threw his head back and laughed. “What on earth gave you that idea?”
“You invited me over to your house, said I’m one of your closest companions - I’m one of the only people you’re comfortable enough to touch.”
“As a comrade - not a,” Alastor’s nose scrunched up, “partner.”
Vox looked down. “Oh.”
“I mean, that just sounds ridiculous. You and me? Dating? When have I ever given you the impression that I’m interested in dating in general? Romance is such a ridiculous endeavor - one that only fools partake in. I thought you were better than that - clearly I was wrong.”
“Okay, fuck, I get it. You’ve already humiliated me enough, you don’t need to degrade me.”
“Oh, but I thought you were attracted to that? Being degraded? Given your choice in company, I’m not sure why I’m surprised.”
“You’re my fucking choice in company.”
Alastor rose from his seat. “Not any more.” He then swiftly walked out of the restaurant, clearly intending to leave Vox with the bill.
The TV demon followed after him, furious. “That’s it? Years of friendship down the drain just like that? Are you fucking serious?”
Alastor stopped at the entrance to an alleyway, his smile growing dangerously. “Am I fucking serious? I didn’t ruin this, Vox, you did. You were stupid enough to catch feelings when I made it perfectly clear I was only interested in friendship.”
“You asshole, you didn’t make that clear at all! You fucking led me on!”
Suddenly a tentacle shot out of the ground and wrapped itself around Vox’s neck. Static began to perforate the air, and Vox couldn’t tell who it was coming from. The tentacle lifted Vox off the ground, cutting off his airflow, making him choke.
Alastor stalked up to him, grin wide, shadows cloaking his face. “I did not lead you on,” he spat. “I made the mistake of thinking you were worthy of my time, that you were an interesting person, that you understood me. As sorry as I am that I was wrong, it is not my fault that you made the foolish decision to feel things towards me I could never reciprocate.”
Vox made a strangled noise, kicking his feet in the air in an attempt to free himself.
Alastor shook his head. “It really is such a shame it has to end like this. I was rather enjoying our time together - not in the way you hoped, of course, but nonetheless.”
Vox grabbed desperately at the tentacle around his neck. “Please,” he tried to croak out, but all that came was an indecipherable noise.
“Look at you. So pathetic. And such a waste of time.” Every word was like a knife to the stomach. Alastor gazed at Vox almost lovingly. The same way he used to look at him whenever they had lunch together. The way that Vox thought was romantic. “Apologies - I’m just taking in your unmarred state. It’ll be the last time anyone ever sees it.”
The static grew louder and Vox called forth his electric powers, shocking the tentacle wrapped around his neck. He fell to his knees, gasping for breath. Alastor watched him kneel there coughing with a sort of macabre interest. “I see my rejection hasn’t completely decimated your will to live. How interesting.”
“Fuck you,” gasped Vox.
“So rude.” Another tentacle shot out of the ground, piercing Vox’s stomach. Blue blood spurted out of the wound as Vox doubled over, still panting.
A blunt shadow figure punched him across the face, leaving a visible crack on his screen. The shadow figure multiplied, and soon enough, Vox was swarmed by at least ten of Alastor’s trapped souls. They tore at his clothes, ripping his suit jacket to shreds. Parts of his screen were chewed off, causing dark spots in his vision.
Every hit was excruciating. Even worse, none of them were fatal. As per usual with Alastor - he liked to keep his victims alive and trapped in his microphone to entertain him.
Ironic, he thought amidst the pain-filled haze, that he had originally gone to Alastor to beg for his life, and now he was just about ready to beg for his death.
Alastor snapped his fingers and the shadow demons went away. Vox curled into a ball on the ground, a broken, sobbing shell of a man. “Pathetic,” sneered the radio demon.
“Kill me,” croaked Vox.
“Why on earth would I do that?” Alastor laughed. “No. I’m going to let you live. You serve as free entertainment. That’s all you’ve ever been to me - entertainment. The only difference now is that I’ll have to view the show from afar.”
Vox didn’t offer Alastor a retort, opting instead for a hateful glare as he limped towards the streetlamp.
He felt for the electricity coursing through it and, in his weakened state, immersed himself in the grid. He sought out Valentino and Velvette’s shared apartment, emerging through their TV. He collapsed in a pile on the floor and dry-heaved.