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“Are you sure you’re gonna be okay by yourself?” Ali asks for the hundredth time that day.
“Yes, Alex, I’ll be fine,” Ashlyn replies with a sigh.
“If you really need me to go with you, I can. You know I don’t mind.”
“I think it’s a little late for that, Alex,” Ashlyn answers with a slight chuckle. “You know I board in about 15 minutes.”
The two soccer stars sit at gate D5 in Raleigh-Durham International Airport, anxiously awaiting the moment when Ashlyn’s plane to Orlando will board. Ali’s plane to New York isn’t boarding for another hour, so they decided to grab some coffee from Starbucks and spend their last moments in North Carolina together, no matter how agonizing the eventual goodbye would be.
Ashlyn will be heading to Orlando to begin the bittersweet process of settling into her new home and, ultimately, her new life away from Ali. They had agreed that it would be best for Ashlyn to go to Florida on her own after their enjoyable weekend at Chapel Hill together, while Ali heads up to New York for Glamour’s Women of the Year Awards.
Unlike past trips, this isn’t a simple visit home for Ashlyn. This trip will solidify the reality that she will no longer be living with her favorite brunette defender anymore. And while both of them knew that this moment was coming, Ashlyn and Ali aren’t ready to adjust to the rapidly approaching change just yet. But, at the same time, progress needs to be made to prepare for the big move. Furniture and housewares need to be bought, and the two need to begin accepting life apart from one another.
Ali pouts like a child and takes a final sip of her coffee, placing the empty cup beside her. Her girlfriend watches her with gentle eyes, softening at the childlike disappointment riddled on the brunette’s face. She wraps an arm around Ali’s shoulders, pulling her close. Ashlyn takes in the scent of Ali’s coconut-scented hair, wanting to remember every unique detail of her princess before she leaves, as the brunette rests her head on her shoulder.
“I’m going to miss you,” Ashlyn whispers quietly.
Ali closes her eyes, comforted by the blond’s voice. The peacefulness she feels with Ashlyn’s arm around her momentarily eases some of the doubts she has about being away from her favorite goalkeeper. “I’m going to miss you too.”
“Now boarding, United Airlines flight 2813 to Orlando, Florida."
Before Ashlyn can speak, Ali mumbles into her shoulder. “No.”
The blond laughs. “Babe, I have to.”
“No, you don’t. They’re lying to you.” Ali looks up at her girlfriend with pleading, chestnut eyes. “You don’t have to go.”
Ashlyn gazes into her girlfriend’s eyes and almost decides not to go. Her heart swells with regret, and she hates herself for having to leave. She knows where she belongs, and that’s with her nose-crinkling, mumbling, sassy Princess Alexandra. With great sorrow, Ashlyn moves her arm around Ali’s shoulders and crouches down before her. She reaches for her girlfriend’s hands, placing gentle kisses on each palm.
“I love you,” Ashlyn says with every ounce of love and tenderness she houses in her body. “You know I hate leaving you, and I wish it didn’t have to be like this. But we both knew this was coming.” She pauses, watching the brunette nod in understanding. She continues, “Let’s just agree to try to have fun while we’re apart. I’ll spend as much time with my crazy brother as possible, and you have a good time in the Big Apple with the gals. And before we know it, we’ll be together again. I promise. Let’s just take it day by day.”
Ali bows her head, deep in thought. “What if… What if we realize that we actually like being apart from each other?”
Ashlyn frowns. With two fingers, she lifts her girlfriend’s chin in order to look into Ali’s sad, chestnut eyes. The blond offers a small smile. “You know that will never happen. I can’t imagine my life without you, Alex. You’re my favorite part of any day. No amount of distance is going to change that.”
“I know this isn’t the big goodbye, but I still hate it.” Ali’s eyes fill with tears as she struggles to keep it together. “I know this move is important for you and for your family. It’s what you’ve always wanted. I just hate the idea of not waking up next to you anymore or sharing a cup of coffee before practice with you. I don’t want to drive to games alone or go out and celebrate a win around DC with the girls without you there by my side.” The brunette shrugs and gives a sad smile. “This trip to Orlando has just got me thinking so much about the big move. I’m happy for you and I know we can handle the distance… I just don’t know how the future is going to work out and it scares me, Ash. I don’t ever want to lose you.”
“Do you love me?”
“Of course I do.”
Ashlyn stands, bringing Ali up with her. The blond wraps her arms around her girlfriend’s waist and pulls her close, resting her forehead against Ali’s. “And I love you. We’re meant to be together, Alex. And no amount of distance for any amount of time is going to change that.” Ashlyn places a soft, gentle kiss on Ali’s lips. “Besides, Florida to DC is going to seem like a piece of cake compared to when you were in Germany.”
For the first time all day, Ali laughs. “Yeah, I guess I’ve never thought about it that way.” She bites her lip. “I guess I’ve just been spoiled with all of the time we’ve spent together since then.”
“Of course you have. It’s my job to spoil you.” Ashlyn laughs. “You are a princess after all!”
“Final call for boarding United Airlines flight 2813 to Orlando, Florida.”
Ali groans and glances up at her taller girlfriend. “I suppose I should let you go then.”
Ashlyn doesn’t reply, choosing instead to lean in and convey what words cannot. In one long, passionate kiss against Ali’s lips, Ashlyn expresses her love, adoration, and affection for her one and only warrior princess. The brunette wraps her arms around the goalkeeper’s neck, unwilling to let the moment end. Ashlyn pulls away from Ali reluctantly, reaching down to grab her duffle bag.
“Text me when you get on your plane, okay? And call me when you land.”
“I will.” Ali pecks her girlfriend’s lips one more time before standing aside and watching Ashlyn hand over her boarding pass. “I love you.”
Ashlyn turns around with a smile before disappearing down the tunnel to the plane for good. “I love you too, princess.”