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Shepard stared at the object Tali was offering her, attempting to control her facial expression. She suspected that she was not doing a very good job. “But, Tali,” she said, “it’s not even Christmas.”
“I know!” Tali said. “But it’s winter here on Rannoch, anyway, and you didn’t really have Christmas last year because of the war, at least that’s what Liara said, and Samantha said these were traditional, so...”
“Did she?” Shepard said evenly, wondering if Traynor was still mad about her toothbrush. Shepard had replaced that, damn it.
“Yes, and I just wanted all my human friends to be comfortable!”
Shepard sighed and accepted the sweater. It was a strange, mottled shade of green, with Santa and his reindeer flying across the front. All of the reindeer’s noses lit up red, and the sleigh was glittery, and Santa’s beard was a giant white pouf that stood out from the sweater and would probably shed white fuzz into Shepard’s drink all evening. “Thanks, Tali,” she said, shrugging it on. The sleeves were too long on her and the whole thing was enormous. She supposed it had to be, to fit all eight reindeer.
Tali beamed and turned to Garrus, who said, “I’m not human, though, and I’m not wearing that.”
“Gaaarrus,” Tali pleaded. “Come on, everyone else is wearing one.”
This was true; Tali herself was wearing one, although hers was kind of cute (silvery snowflakes on a purple and blue background), plus it actually fit. But, peering into the main room of Tali’s house, Shepard could spot Joker in a giant red sweater and a Santa hat, and Kaidan wearing a sweater with a moose whose eyes lit up, and Traynor and Liara had somehow wound up in matching snowman sweaters.
Garrus glared at Tali, who kept holding out the bundle of green fuzz and saying “pleeeease.” Shepard poked him in the side.
“If I’m wearing one, you’re wearing one,” she said under her breath.
Garrus growled. “Fine,” he said, and took the sweater and yanked it on, heedless of his fringe. Shepard stifled a laugh as the sweater settled on – it was definitely made for a turian, with a massive soft collar that flopped around his cowl, and it was the match to hers, the same shade of green, but with Santa kicking back on a beach this time.
“You look great!” Tali said, snapping a picture with her omni-tool. “Come on in, wait until the others see you!” She darted into the party.
“Why does Tali hate us?” Garrus said plaintively.
Shepard sighed. “This is probably revenge for getting married when she couldn’t make it.”
His eyes grew wide and his mandibles snapped in. “You’re right. It is.”
“But hey, at least the company’s good, and there are drinks,” she said, extending her arm. “So let’s go.”
Garrus grumbled something more, but slid his arm through hers, and they were greeted by the cheers of the crew when they went in.