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Today was a relatively normal afternoon at Weekend Garage. An was working her typical afternoon shift after school; helping out her father at the cafe with Kohane keeping her company. Vivid Bad Squad had a performance later, so they all decided to meet up at Weekend Garage before walking to the venue. Kohane had no obligation to be there so early, but she liked keeping An company in the afternoons.
Finally, rush hour is over, I wonder what Kohane is up to now. She turned around to see her partner with her nose in a magazine. Squinting to read the title, when An read it, she couldn’t help but let out a little sigh. “Another relationship magazine?”
“Huh, yeah it is…I picked it up at the music store after school” Kohane said sheepishly. An should have expected that it was another love magazine. Yes, another , this was not the first, and it probably won’t be the last. Every few days for the last few weeks, she would find a new one and tell An about all that she read. Now, what caused this sudden change in Kohane? Most likely the fact that she recently got into a relationship with Toya. An was really excited for them back when they first became official and even though she is still really happy for them, sometimes hearing the constant talk about relationships was tiring. Maybe it was since she couldn’t relate so everything inevitably flew over her head.
As if Kohane could read her expression, she quickly responded, “B-but this one is different than the others An! It’s really interesting!” She was unsurprisingly met with apparent skepticism from An. “It’s about romantic symbolism.”
“What does that mean?” Now this was a new topic for An.
“The magazine just goes over some hypothesized symbolism of romantic gestures. A lot of it goes over how to tell how someone feels about you through their actions and words. Isn’t that interesting, An!”
An could not deny that this was the slightest bit interesting to think about. “How do you know that this is legit though? Couldn’t all of these be made up?”
“When I was reading it, I could relate some of the ideas from the magazine to Toya and I. Looking back at us before we became official, I believe that some of the signs were there, which makes this a very interesting read.”
“Huh sure.” An shrugged. She was not the type to become superstitious over such things, but she was also a curious person. “So…what were some things the magazine said?”
Happy that An seemed unusually interested in the conversation, Kohane excitedly replied, “Mhm, let me think of an interesting one…I got it! So there was this one section about how hand/arm holding placement can determine how much someone who has romantic potential is interested in you. Here look at this.” An looked over Kohane’s shoulder at the page she was pointing to. It read:
-If someone holds your hand, they like you in a friendly but not romantic way.
-If someone holds you by the wrist, that means that they don’t really care about you in a romantic way and may or may not despise you.
-If they place their hand on your forearm, they like you in a romantic way.
-If someone holds you by your upper arm, they are absolutely obsessed with you.
Just then, they both turned their heads towards the ring of the front door bell. “Yo, we’re here” Akito greeted them. “Huh did you start practice already? I guess we’re late.”
“No we were just hanging out.” An replied. “We have a life outside practice you know.”
“Hello An, Kohane.” Toya waved before walking up to Kohane and patting her on the head; Akito and An both just let the lovebirds be.
“Anyways, now that we are all here, we can get started!” An said proudly. They practiced a quick run through of their performance for around thirty minutes before heading over to the venue. It was a new live house location, but it was known for having more accomplished rising artists perform.
“All the equipment is set up for you,” A stage manager told Vivid Bad Squad before they were set to go on stage. “Be careful though, one of the extension cables is sticking out, so it may be a tripping hazard.”
They all nodded in response and started walking out to the stage. The performance ran smoothly just as they rehearsed and the crowd seemed to love them. Soon though, it came time for their last song of the evening.
“Thanks everyone for listening! For our last song, we will be performing ‘Ready Steady’!” An yelled out to the cheering crowd before they began. Wow this might be our best live yet! Kohane looks so confident, Toya has emotion in his voice, and Akito… An yelped. She was too caught up in the live that she lost track of her surroundings. An found herself tripping over the extension cord that the stage manager warned her about earlier. Oh no, it’s wraps for me, and just when the performance was going so well. She closed her eyes and waited for her the impact, but that moment never came.
“You ok??” An looked up to see Akito’s olive eyes staring at her in worry. She looked around and noticed that he caught her by the upper arm right before she fell down – wait, by the upper arm!? An did a double take.
If someone holds you by your upper arm, they are absolutely obsessed with you.
There’s no way, right?? Akito was her teammate, who just saved her from an embarrassing fall. Yeah that was it. Ugh like I believe some stupid relationship magazine anyways…An snap out of it. An told herself.
“Huh, An come on, we still have a performance to finish.” Akito whispered to her, “Also, this is starting to look weird…” An had to agree, this was definitely a noticeable mess up that they couldn’t pass it off as part of the choreography.
“A-alright.” She got back up and they continued doing whatever they were supposed to be doing, Kohane and Toya had covered for them well. The rest of the performance went well enough considering the incident earlier, even though An was still a bit flustered from what happened. It was unlike her to make such a big mistake, and it was even more unlike her to keep thinking about ‘him’.
“I’m sorry everyone,” An apologized to her team after their live ended. “Our performance was going really well and it’s all my fault it got messed up.”
“An…it’s okay, it was an accident. You did your best and recovered fine.” Kohane said in attempt to comfort her.
“Everyone makes mistakes sometimes” Toya reassured.
“Yeah you did fine.” Akito didn’t make eye contact. “Anyways, it’s getting late and we all have school tomorrow, see ya.” He walked off with Toya going with him. An and Kohane decided to walk home together.
“An, you seem to be spacing out. If it’s about the performance earlier, it’s okay, don’t worry too much about it. No one is upset at you for it.”
“Huh, no it’s not about that.” An snapped back to reality.
“You can always talk to me if you need someone to talk to.”
“Kohane?”
“Yeah An?”
“...You wouldn’t mind if I borrowed that magazine from earlier, would you?”
--------------------------------------
The next day…
“~An, wake up!” A voice called out to her.
An slowly opened her eyes and looked up to see Mizuki standing over her desk.
“You sleepyhead, what were you up to last night to make you so tired today.”
“We had a performance…”
“Oh right! I think Ena mentioned something about little bro having a performance~ How was it?”
“It was okay.” An said as she laid down her head on her desk again.
“Hmm if you say so I guess,” They saw An with her head on her desk again. “If you are too exhausted, you should go visit the nurse’s office, it’s not good to exhaust yourself too much.”
“It’s okay…just a few more hours of school anyways.” She looked at Mizuki’s concerned face. “Really, I’m fine. I’ll just skip practice today and rest.” Mizuki gave her an approving look and went back to their seat.
An fought to not fall asleep for the rest of the class period, she didn’t want to worry Mizuki. Though it was true that they had the performance yesterday, that wasn’t why she was so tired today. In reality, she had stayed up all night reading…reading Kohane’s relationship magazine. It’s not like she was reading into last night’s incident, that sounded superstitious…but, she couldn’t help but wonder if what the magazine was saying was real. It was probably an accident that Akito caught her by the upper arm, but what if he really was obsessed with her?? She didn’t know how she feels about that….so she needed to find a way to overanalyze his actions to make sure he didn’t actually like her. What started out as skimming a few pages turned into finishing the whole magazine and then moving on to reading through online forums.
An sighed and opened up the VBS group chat, she better let her teammates know she’s skipping practice.
Heya, I’m a bit exhausted today, so I don’t think I’ll come to practice today :(
Kohane: It’s ok, I hope you feel better An!
Toya: See you tomorrow *thumbs up*
“ No response from Akito. Hmm according to the internet, lack of response to personal text messages is a sign that the other person doesn’t care about you romantically. Well that contradicts what happened last night…” The rest of the day could not have gone any slower. She even slacked off on her hall monitoring duties, letting Rui and Tsukasa get away with their usual mischief. Much to Mizuki’s worry, An fell asleep in every class period, only waking up when called or yelled at by the teacher. By ring of the final bell, she was more than happy to get out of there as soon as possible. She groggily walked out of the classroom and made her way to the entrance.
“There you are.” An turned around to hear a familiar voice, the voice of the person who could not leave her thoughts last night.
“Huh, you were looking for me?”
“Mizuki mentioned that you weren’t doing too well today. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t fall asleep in your class and miss the bell, it would suck to be locked in overnight or something.”
“Oh thanks…aren’t you late for practice though?” She was met with a shrug from Akito.
He put his hands in his pockets and began walking away, “It’s whatever, we don’t start until a bit later anyways. Don’t fall asleep on the way home or something, also message in the group chat so Kohane doesn’t worry.” With another turn of the hallway, he was gone. An began walking out of school so she could go home.
“Well that was nice of Akito to check up on me – wait. Since when does Akito do that?? If it was coming from Kohane, or even Toya, it would be more normal. No way he actually likes me. He didn’t reply in the group chat earlier but now he decides to be considerate? The magazine made it seem like this stuff was easy to interpret…why is he so confusing. I guess I need more evidence before a conclusion can be made…”
The next few days passed by relatively peacefully, but anyone who knew An would say that she had been acting weird. Whatever it was, she seemed to be avoiding the topic to the point where her teammates became worried for her. Even though practices were going great, An would run away right afterwards.
Speaking of practice, it was the end of a typical school day which meant it was time for An to head off to practice once again. It had been a week since the incident that started it all. An couldn’t help but smile, Akito had mentioned that he had something after school and probably wouldn’t make it to practice, so An could attend practice in peace without worrying about his presence. As she skipped down the main hallway towards the entrance, she suddenly felt a hand grab her and pull her into a side hallway. Before she had time to panic, the figure made a shushing motion with his hand.
“Huh Akito?” She looked at him puzzled, then she looked down to see his hand holding her wrist.
If someone holds you by the wrist, that means that they don’t really care about you in a romantic way and may or may not despise you.
“Now that’s confusing…” An’s thoughts wandered off.
Akito looked down at An oddly staring at his hand and let go. “Ok what is with you. You’ve been weird all week.”
“Huhh, w-what do you mean weird?! I’m completely normal. Wait, didn’t you have something after school today? W-why are you bothering me.” An stuttered.
“Bothering you is my after school activity.” Akito rolled his eyes. “Anyways, stop lying, you’ve been weird ever since last week. It doesn’t take a genius to notice.”
“Nothing happened.”
“Liar, something happened.”
“Nothing happened! Just leave me alone!” An was getting nervous, she should probably not have been so harsh. Akito lacked a response for a few seconds.
“Hey An, do you hate me or something?” Now that was not what An expected to hear. “You’ve been avoiding me and giving me the most weirded out expressions all week.”
“Huh what do you mean?”
He ran his hand through his hair, “You know, if I did something wrong, just tell me.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong though? I wasn’t purposely avoiding you or anything.”
“Then how do you explain the encounter at the grocery store last Friday?”
Flashback…
“‘101 Ways to Tell If Someone Likes You’, now this looks like a good one hehe.” An spoke to herself as she was looking through the magazines at the checkout aisle of the grocery store. Her dad asked her to run some errands, but she had gotten a bit distracted.
“What are you reading?” An snapped around to see Akito.
“A-akito, what are you doing here?”
“Picking up some cheesecake for Ena.”
“Oh, ok…I’m just going to be heading out now, bye!” She said as she quickly checked out and bolted out of the store.
“Umm, bye?”
End of flashback…
“Well…I had something else to pick up for my dad that day…” An couldn’t tell him that she was reading romance magazines, that’s embarrassing.
“Oh well umm, I guess that makes enough sense. But how do you explain lunch two days ago?”
Flashback…
An had been sitting with Mizuki the last few days at lunch, but they were busy with something today, therefore she had no choice but to be around Akito and Toya.
“Hey Toya!” She greeted as she found Toya sitting in the normal lunch spot.
“Oh hello An, are you sitting here today for lunch?”
“Yeah, Mizuki wanted me to sit with them the last few days, but they’re busy right now.”
“Oh ok, well you are free to sit here whenever. Akito will be joining us soon.”
“O-oh ok…”
“Did someone mention me?” Great why couldn’t he have shown up later.
“Yeah, An’s joining us for lunch today.”
“Oh, hey.” He greeted An and sat next to her.
An’s thoughts wandered. “Uh oh…why is he sitting next to me?? He could easily sit next to Toya. Close proximity is a sign of attraction. Ughh how can I eat lunch in peace like this”
“Actually… I just suddenly remembered I had to meet up with someone during lunch haha.” An stood up.
“Oh with who?” Akito questioned.
“Umm with…” She took a quick look around and spotted the three Wonderlands x Showtime members practicing some play. “With… Rui, yeah with Rui! Anyways bye!”
“Hmm I wonder what she needed to meet with Tsukasa-senpai’s friend about” Toya wondered out loud.
“Yeah…I wonder.” Akito had a good feeling she was lying.
End of flashback…
“Uhh, I genuinely had to talk to Rui about something, I was really interested in umm his new explosion invention?” An laughed nervously.
“Ok, you know both of us would get out of here quicker if you just told the truth.”
“I am though! These are mere coincidences where I’ve been avoiding you–” She quickly shut her mouth, she accidentally said too much.
“Ah, so you have been avoiding me.” She made eye contact with him and noticed Akito looked a bit…dejected? “Well I figured as such, especially since this is the first time all week you have actually looked me in the eye. Even at practice where it is important to be coordinated with your teammates, you would just avoid me at any cost.”
Flashback…
“I think we could run through this section one more time.” Kohane told the rest of her teammates after they did a run through of ‘Alter Ego’.
“I agree, we weren’t in sync.” Toya turned to An and Akito. “You two are supposed to be singing together, but you aren’t matching up. An, you were beat ahead and Akito, you are lagging behind.” They tried practicing the scene a few more times, but issues still persisted, they then decided to take a quick break. Akito handed out water bottles to everyone.
“Here” He handed one to An.
“Oh thanks.”
“You seem distracted, if you’re not feeling well again, you should go home.”
“Huh, why is he seemingly concerned. Uh oh, he keeps doing this. According that one forum, consistent concern for wellbeing could imply more than just friendly concern…” An’s thoughts recalled what she had read. Her thoughts were interrupted by Toya walking up to them.
“Hmm, I was watching both of you, and I noticed that you aren’t making eye contact at all. The section would be smoother if you did that. An, every time Akito tries to look at you, you look away.” All of them now looked at An curiously, waiting for a response to this.
“W-well…umm…the lights! The lights keep hitting my eyes uncomfortably so I have to look away.”
“Oh why didn’t you say so earlier An!” Kohane said as she dimmed the lights in the area they were practicing in. It was pretty evident that lighting was not the issue however since she still did not meet Akito’s gaze directly – for the rest of this practice and the practices afterwards…
End of flashback…
“Well, what logical explanation do you have for all of that?” Akito inquired.
“I just…I just don’t have one!” An finally admitted in frustration. “Ok? You happy now?”
“So you’ve been avoiding me for no reason?” Akito was skeptical.
“Well yes–wait no.” An sighed. “It’s a long story, and if you’ll excuse me, I have a practice to get to!” An wasn’t ready to draw conclusions, avoiding her feelings was the best way to go about it. Wait–avoiding her feelings? Since when did she have feelings for him??
Was she the one showing all the signs of attraction all along? Thinking back, it was always her who avoided him first, it was always her who interpreted everything as Akito might like her, it was always her that worried about what would happen if Akito did have feelings for her. She thought that she was paranoid that he liked her, but he must have thought that her weird actions correlate with her liking him. Ughh what a mess she got herself into…
Akito sighed. “Fine, go to practice.” Akito shoved his hands in his pockets and began walking away.
“Wait! Akito!” An yelled. “I-I don’t like you whatsoever! It’s your fault, you started it! You gaslighted me into believing that you liked me, which made me gaslight myself into liking you, which gaslighted you into thinking I liked you, which ughhh”
“What is she even going on about…” Akito was now lost.
“Just know, I definitely don’t like you at all!” She stormed off. Akito shrugged and walked off in confusion.
Out of all explanations for her behavior, he wasn’t expecting a confession, if you can even call it a confession. Akito truthfully never really thought of An that way before but after this, his face was slightly red. “Why is she so confusing to deal with…she’s the definition of a mixed signal.”