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It all starts with a phone call. Well, technically it all starts with- Nevermind. For Asahi, it all starts with a phone call on a chilly Monday in September. He’s on his break at work, taking a well-deserved rest from bicycling packages around Tokyo, and eating a late lunch. When he first sees Daichi’s number flash across the screen of his mobile phone, Asahi knows there must be an emergency. Daichi never calls him. Ever. Even Suga rarely calls him during the day. They all live together now, whatever it is can wait until dinnertime. Except on Tuesdays and Thursdays, when Suga has an evening class, so they don’t all eat dinner together.
Anyways. The phone call. Asahi picks up hurriedly, bracing himself for bad news.
“Yes...?” he speaks into his mobile phone, hunching his shoulders further over the table in anticipation of bad news, his lunch forgotten.
Daichi’s voice filters through, the familiar sound of shoe squeaks and sportsmanlike shouts echoing in the background. Right. It’s practice day for Daichi (also on Wednesdays and Thursdays, and all day Saturday). “Oh good. You’re on your break now, right?”
“Yes…”
“Great. I have someone here who wants to ask you a favour.”
Asahi hears the shuffle of Daichi’s phone exchanging hands before he has a chance to blurt out a question about this person’s identity.
“Asahi-san? Uh, hey. Hi! It’s me… Nishinoya. How are you?”
“Nishinoya!” If Daichi were here, Asahi would have quite the peeved expression for him. “Oh, I’m, I’m fine. What can I do for you?”
This is terrible. “What can I do for you”?? He sounds like a flight attendant or something, asking what drink he can get for our esteemed flyer Nishinoya-san. He should’ve asked Nishinoya how he is. How could he be so discourteous!? This is Daichi’s fault for blindsiding him like this. Sure, Asahi knows Daichi’s team sometimes practices with Nishinoya’s, but still! Some warning would have been nice!
“Okay, jumping right in, huh. Look Asahi, I know we haven’t seen each other, or spoken to each other since like, January, so this will seem weird, but. Maybe I should be asking you this in person. We need to get back to practice soon anyways…”
Asahi hears Daichi saying something in the background, about bringing Nishinoya home with him for dinner tonight. Nishinoya seems to agree, and speaks to Asahi again.
“Look, don’t worry, okay Asahi-san? Daichi says I can come over for dinner, so I’ll ask you then. I’ve gotta go, I’ll see you tonight!”
Asahi prepares a few choice words for Daichi, but is hung up on. The rest of the day is spent bicycling, getting people’s signatures for their packages, and stewing over the mystery favour Nishinoya is expecting from him.
Safe to say, when Daichi arrives at their apartment with Nishinoya, Suga is much more excited to see him. Asahi and Suga are dishing out dinner when Daichi comes through the door, Nishinoya in tow.
“Welcome home- Noya! Oh, what a surprise! What are you doing here? Daichi, why didn’t you tell me? You’re just lucky I made enough stir fry to go around! You are staying for dinner, aren’t you? Asahi, did you know about this?” Suga babbles on as he hugs Nishinoya, a warm smile spreading across his face.
Nishinoya waves to Asahi as he follows Suga into the kitchen. “I’m actually here to ask him for a favour.”
Soon, a fourth bowl is filled with stir fry, and they all sit down to eat. They stay fairly quiet, focused on eating, although Nishinoya takes every opportunity to gush over Suga’s food. Asahi supposes he and Daichi have grown accustomed to Suga’s culinary skills.
“That was awesome! I almost feel guilty, having such a delicious meal behind Ryuu’s back…” Nishinoya grins widely as he helps clear the table.
Suga starts to load their little tabletop dishwasher, easily keeping the conversation flowing. “Oh, how is Tanaka? We haven’t seen him either, since the Daichi and Asahi’s Birthday Party and New Year’s Celebration. You two were little first years then. How is your second year of college treating you so far? Are the dynamics on your team any different this year?”
“That… is actually a good segue into… The favour I’ve gotta ask Asahi-san.”
Asahi almost drops the cups he’s handing to Suga, meeting Nishinoya’s eyes worriedly. Suga grabs the cups before any further clumsiness can threaten them, slotting them into the dishwasher with finality.
“Why don’t you two go talk about it in the front room?” Suga says, looking between the two of them. “Daichi, help me with the- with the tea. I want tea, and I need your help with it. Do either of you want tea?”
“Yes please...” Asahi squints at Suga in suspicion. Doesn’t he want to know what’s going on? Is he really banking on being about to squeeze the truth out of Daichi? It doesn’t matter now anyways, Nishinoya is looking at Asahi expectantly from the doorway, so he follows him reluctantly into the front room, like a man going to meet a vaguely grim fate.
They sit back down in the positions they sat at for dinner, and Asahi meets Nishinoya’s intense stare across the table.
“So. I’m glad it’s just you, because I don’t want you to feel pressured into accepting my… request. Basically, I’m asking you to be my fake boyfriend.” Nishinoya pauses, clearly expecting Asahi to be processing his last sentence. He is not. If Asahi were some sort of electrical appliance, he would have short-circuited or something. Unfortunately, Asahi is a human, and has no good excuse for not responding. Nishinoya seems to take pity on him, and clarifies his request.
“Okay, I know it sounds weird, I said it would, but here it is. So, the new captain for my team, apparently he has like… a crush on me. Last year, before he was captain, I thought it was just a joke, something his friends teased him about, but this year, last week, he confessed to me. I didn’t want to flat out reject him, I mean he’s my captain now, so I said I was dating someone already. I figured, if pressed, I could like, make out with Ryuu a couple times in front of him, case closed. But then, then he says ‘oh, is it that guy from high school you’re always talking about?’, and I’m like ‘what? who?’, and at this point I just want to get out of there, like my palms are sweaty and blood’s rushin’ through my ears. I get it out of him that he’s talking about you, and I just say yes. Yup, that’s who I’m dating, sorry, see ya. I thought that was the end of it, but now everybody wants to meet you.”
“You talk about me?”
“That’s what you got out of what I just said?”
“I’m trying not to take in too much at once, okay?”
Nishinoya sighs and makes a face. “...I talk about you a reasonable amount.”
“Okay, and remind me why you couldn’t just turn him down?”
Nishinoya scrubs his hands over his face, fixing Asahi with a harried look. “I didn’t want it to be weird! He’s the captain now.”
“So?”
“So, imagine if Daichi- no. Imagine if, back when you were a beardless little high school first year, the captain then asked you out. Hmm?”
“But you aren’t a beardless little high school first year. Well, you are beardless. And you are still-” Asahi cuts himself off abruptly, but Nishinoya catches him anyways.
“Little!? Still little!? Asahi-san, I’ll have you know I’ve grown.”
Hardly.
“Regardless, you’re in your second year, and in secondary education! You’re an adult now, so…”
“You know, you can just say that you don’t want to do it. I won’t be offended, I knew it was a longshot. I’ll come up with some excuse.”
Asahi ponders the options, leaving Nishinoya hanging. On one hand, if he says no, he most likely won’t see Nishinoya again until the Daichi and Asahi’s Birthday Party and New Year’s Celebration. He can’t say he enjoys not seeing him for entire years at a time. It’s a wonder they even end up at the same New Year’s festivities anymore. On the other hand, the whole “pretend dating” thing sounds like it could get supremely awkward. Especially for Asahi, considering there was once a time he would have loved to real date Nishinoya. He hasn’t put much thought into whether those feelings have fully vanished or not. What if fake dating Nishinoya brings back all these unwanted feelings about him and real dating? But it would be nice to spend more time with him. Frankly, Asahi knows he should get out more, expand his circle beyond his roommates. And Asahi misses Nishinoya. Maybe more than he realized.
“Asahi-san? I’m serious, if you’re not comfortable-”
“Let’s do it!” Asahi blurts out before he can muster up a reason to stop himself.
“What? Really? You’re sure? You don’t have to make any hasty decisions.”
Asahi can’t deny that it feels good to be the cause of such a hopeful smile on Nishinoya’s face, so he nods. “I’m sure.”
Nishinoya’s smile only brightens, until his eyes are shut tight with happiness. Asahi can’t help but smile back.
“Thank you so much! We can work out the details later, we should free Suga and Daichi from their self-imposed exile to the kitchen.”
As if on cue, Suga and Daichi exit the kitchen, tea and wafers in hand. Of course they had been eavesdropping. Suga says nothing at first, but has a smug look on his face as he pours the tea. Asahi knows he’ll be seeing that same smug smile for quite a while.
He’s right, of course, and anytime he’s in a room with Nishinoya and Suga for the next couple weeks, the same little smirk is on Suga’s face. Sometimes Nishinoya doesn’t even have to be there, Suga’s still smirking at him.
Asahi still hasn’t gotten the hang of calling him “Yuu”. It just feels wrong. Even Tanaka rarely calls him that. But Nishinoya- Yuu. Well, Asahi can hardly go around calling him by his full name all the time. Yuu. Yuu insists that he’s not introducing Asahi to his team until they’ve both gotten the hang of this more... intimate name calling. (Nishinoya still calls him Asahi-san sometimes.) (Yuu still calls him Asahi-san sometimes. Yuu. Weird.) Asahi’s not sure how he feels about meeting the team. On one hand, the sooner he meets the team, the sooner this whole charade will be over. On the other hand, the sooner he meets the team, the sooner this whole charade will be over. He really should have sorted out his feelings.
They have worked out a backstory. It’s easy, since they already know each other. When it comes to fake dating, it seems there’s a lot more strategizing than, say, holding hands or kissing in front of other people. Again, Asahi’s not sure how he feels about this. It is both a blessing and a curse. Their story is that they started getting friendly again at the last Daichi and Asahi’s Birthday Party and New Year’s Celebration, and started dating officially in May of this year. Suga, Daichi, Tanaka, and Tanaka’s sister are all in on it. Tanaka’s sister seems to love acting like he’s Yuu’s real boyfriend, even when there’s nobody around to fool. It’s a little disconcerting.
Asahi has to try not to blush every time he uses “Yuu” instead of “Nishinoya”.
And try not to think about having to call him “Nishinoya” again when they break up.
Fake break up, of course.
Nishinoya-
Yuu is the one who suggests they go on some dates to get into their “couple groove”, before meeting the team. After some wrangling with their schedules, they have two dates planned, one Tuesday evening, and one Sunday morning. It’s worse, Asahi thinks, when (fake) dating a friend, because everything is so casual and comfortable. He doesn’t have to worry about impressing his date until his nerves are shot, worry about what to wear, worry about where to take them, worry about what they’ll think of him. They just sit in the apartment while Suga and Daichi are out and laugh about how impossible their schedules are, and heckle the terrible movie that’s playing on the television. Awful. It lulls Asahi into a false sense of… not security, really. Into a false sense of dating. Like they really are dating. For real.
The first date, they decide to go to a movie. Asahi loves movie dates. Small chance of awkward gaps in conversation: you don’t talk during the movie, and after, if you can’t think of a conversation topic, just talk about the movie! Foolproof.
Yuu is late.
It’s not his fault, really, he did warn Asahi that he has to rush over from class. Nevertheless, Asahi clutches the movie tickets in his hand worriedly, wondering what they could possibly do if they don’t get into the movie on time.
“Asahi! Asahi!”
Asahi turns towards his name, seeing Yuu running across the theatre lobby, waving energetically, a wide grin on his face. He has flowers in his other hand. Why. Asahi squints at them in concern and suspicion. He also might need glasses.
"So sorry I’m late! And to our first date!” Yuu whispers ‘first’, like his volleyball team has this movie theatre lobby bugged. “These are for you! Here, give me my ticket, you go in, and I’ll get snacks and meet you in there!”
Asahi takes the flowers thrust in his face, and allows Yuu to take his ticket and run off towards the concession stand. He looks down at the flowers in embarrassed horror. He’d probably try burying his head in them out of pure embarrassment, but that sounds like a recipe for getting bugs on his face. He settles for hunching over them, as if trying to disguise them from the movie-goers around him. Oh god, what if he can’t even take them into the theatre? Flowers probably don’t count as “outside food”, but still. Asahi feels close to tears as he presents his ticket to the ticket-ripping employee. It must be a slow night, because this person seems to feel the need to talk to him beyond the standard “enjoy the movie”.
“Your date stood you up, huh? Sorry about that, man.”
Looking in confusion at the stranger addressing him, Asahi snatches his ticket stub back and bustles by. Maybe he looked more weepy than he thought.
Getting inside the actual theatre presents yet another dilemma. He doesn’t know where Yuu likes to sit in the theatre. He seems like a right-up-at-the-front kind of guy. But Asahi hates that. He’s a right-at-the-back kind of guy, no matter how bad his eyesight’s getting. What if their movie seat preferences aren’t compatible? Does that mean they aren’t compatible as people!? Never in his life has a movie date caused Asahi so much stress.
Yuu arrives, saving Asahi from a fate of standing dumbly in the aisle.
“Asahi? Is something wrong?” Yuu asks, in what must be his idea of a whisper. Strange, he had whispered so well in the lobby.
“...Asahi?”
“Ah, yes! Sorry, I don’t know where you like sitting? In the movie theatre, I mean."
“Oh! You could’ve just chosen a spot. I like anywhere!”
He likes anywhere in the theatre? That just doesn’t sound realistic. Asahi makes his way to the back anyways, hoping Yuu wasn’t joking. He sits down on Asahi’s left side without protest, so it must be fine. Disaster averted.
“Since I only have two hands, and they’re admittedly smaller than average, I could only get one drink and one popcorn. So we’ll share okay? The drink’s just orange soda. I remember you used to get that as a treat from the vending machine in the train station. Hopefully you haven’t gone off it… Have you? Gone off it?”
“Oh, no. I still like it,” Asahi nods, feeling touched that he would remember such an obscure thing about him. “Touched” may not be the right word, but Asahi can’t find another. It feels like his chest suddenly needs more air in it than usual, and he can pinpoint exactly where his heart rests in his chest. See? Definitely difficult to describe in one word.
Yuu smiles one of his best, where his nose wrinkles and his eyes shut tight. “Great! I got two straws. Here,” Yuu stuffs one straw into the drink, takes out a pocketknife and saws off a small portion of the other before putting it in with the other. “The short one’s mine.”
Luckily, the movie starts before Asahi’s heart can swell any further. Probably bad for his health. The movie is a documentary about sea life. It was the only thing playing at a convenient time, and Yuu insisted that he doesn’t mind documentaries.
The narrator is talking about coral when Yuu takes Asahi’s hand. Like a fool, Asahi whips his head to stare obviously at their intertwined fingers and then at the perpetrator. He couldn’t just leave it be, could he? And of course, Yuu just smiles his nose-scrunching smile at Asahi and turns back to the movie, squeezing Asahi’s hand.
Asahi wonders if this whole “fake dating” thing was such a good idea after all.
Yuu lets go of his hand at the end of the movie to stretch his arms above his head, but snatches Asahi’s hand right back up again before they’ve even left the theatre. He swings their hands back and forth a few times before fixing Asahi with a hard stare.
“This doesn’t make you uncomfortable, does it? Holding hands?”
“Oh. No, it’s- we should get used to it. Like the name thing. So it doesn’t seem weird and forced in front of your team.” Asahi gives Yuu what he hopes is a reassuring smile.
“Right! That’s right. So what’d you think of the movie?”
“I liked it! I didn’t like the part about the deep sea creatures though. I don’t like the idea of those things existing on the same planet as me. Or at all.”
“And just think about the depths we humans have never explored! Who knows what’s down there…Oooh….” Yuu trails off, eyes wide in mock horror, before laughing at Asahi’s sour expression.
“You can laugh all you want, it’s a perfectly healthy fear to have!”
“Did you like the flowers? Or was it too much?”
“Oh,” Asahi looks down at the flowers in his right hand, now admittedly a little wilted from his fussing. “I… I liked them. I like them. Thank you.”
For once, Yuu doesn’t smile, instead nodding, looking pensively at the floor.
Yuu walks Asahi all the way back to his apartment, despite Asahi’s many protestations. Since he doesn’t know where Yuu’s dorms are, he doesn’t know how truthful Yuu is when he says it’s not a great inconvenience. When the building comes into sight, Asahi begins to fuss. Isn’t this where, on a real date, a good night kiss might happen? But this isn’t a real date. But they held hands! And Yuu gave him flowers! And he’s getting used to referring to him as “Yuu”!
“Asahi? Is something wrong?”
Asahi turns to see Yuu looking up at him worriedly. He must have let some of his fussing show on his face. They make it to the door of the apartment building before Asahi answers.
“It’s fine. Thank you. For the flowers and everything.” Asahi isn’t sure how sincere he needs to be here. It was only a fake date, to practice their act. But at times, it had seemed so real, the emotion seemed so genuine. Asahi wanted a good night kiss after such a date. Except the kiss would be bittersweet, because it too wouldn’t be real.
They don’t kiss, and Asahi slumps up the stairs with a veritable cocktail of emotions running through him.
For the rest of the week, Asahi feels off. This fake dating thing is both worse and better than he expected.
They text on and off throughout the week, of course. Asahi can always expect a good morning and good night text from Yuu. He always wonders why. They aren’t really dating. It’s not like anyone’s going to rummage through their text message history. Who are they trying to fool? But it’s nice. That someone is thinking about him when he’s not even around. Especially because it’s Yuu.
On Saturday evening, Asahi gets a call instead of a text.
" Hey, Asahi!”
He sounds tired. Maybe he’s calling to cancel their fake date tomorrow.
"Asahi? Are you there?”
“Ah, I’m here, sorry. Is something wrong?”
“Not really… Well it’s about our date tomorrow. I’m bone tired from practice today, d’you think we can just stay in? I know we were gonna try that pastry shop Suga suggested, but I don’t think I’ll be up to running around the city… Asahi? Sorry, are you really looking forward to-”
“Oh, no! Oh, it’s fine! We can try it another time.” What a stupid thing to say! Why would there be another time?? They’re not actually dating!! “Staying in sounds fun. If you’re so tired, I can always come over to your dorm?”
“Definitely not. You are not coming over to my sad, messy, little dorm room. I can make it over there fine. Thanks though. I should probably get some sleep…”
“Oh, of course! Good night.”
“Good night.”
Asahi falls asleep quite quickly after that, calmed at the prospect of a “date” in a more relaxed setting. Home court advantage. Little chance of awkwardness, embarrassment, or uncomfortable emotions.
Of course, Asahi realizes Sunday morning that he is over-looking something. Suga. Daichi has study group on Sunday mornings, but Suga. Suga has absolutely no reason to be out of the apartment.
“Oh, good morning Asahi! Is there some reason you’re standing in the hall staring off into space?”
“Has Daichi left for his study group?”
Suga seems confused by his sudden topic change, but answers anyways, “Yes he has. Why?”
“Is there any chance you have something to be doing outside of the apartment today?”
“Why, are you trying to get rid of me? I thought you had a date with Noya.”
“It’s a fake date. A practice date. And the thing is… he’s tired from yesterday’s practice, so he’s just coming over and we’re going to stay in.”
“I see. So you’re kicking me out, huh?” Suga crosses his arms, his eyebrows raised in what Asahi knows to be a mocking expression.
“No! Just that-”
“It’s okay, Asahi.” Suga grins, tapping Asahi’s arm sympathetically. “You want the date to be perfect, I understand.”
“Fake date. We are fake dating.”
“Whatever you say, Asahi. I’ll just go out with Oikawa or Satsuki or something. Have fun with your boyfriend.” Suga starts to go, before turning back to Asahi. “Sorry, fake boyfriend.”
Suga leaves for good then, grabbing his bag and waving to Asahi as he goes out the door. Asahi then has an hour and a half to bustle around the apartment, fussing over magazines left out and dust behind the television. He has scrubbed down the entire kitchen by the time the buzzer sounds from the front room, hopefully meaning Yuu is down at the front door.
Soon enough, Yuu is at the apartment door. He is grinning, as usual, and has a box of powdered donuts in his hand.
They watch another movie, an action thriller this time, and Yuu is fairly loud and rowdy for someone claiming to be tired. He has always been excitable though, especially when it comes to action movies. Asahi enjoys the cinematography, and is happy that Yuu seems to be having a good time.
Halfway through the movie, Suga texts him. Allowing himself to be distracted from the faceoff between the hero and villain, Asahi reads the message.
If you aren’t comfortable with this, I’m sure Noya will accept you backing out.
Oh. Had Asahi seemed so uncomfortable when he spoke to Suga? It’s just that he doesn’t like people treating it like a real relationship! Because it isn’t. It’s so easy for Asahi to forget that it’s all fake when Yuu is holding hands with him and bringing him flowers and donuts. It’s so nice. But maybe Suga’s right. He should back out, before he gets too wrapped up in this illusion of dating, and does something stupid.
The hero is having a tender moment with the woman he just rescued, and Yuu seems unimpressed and uninterested with the scene, so Asahi takes the opportunity.
“Yuu? I was thinking,” Asahi starts, and Yuu turns to give him his full attention. “I was thinking, maybe this isn’t such a good idea. Fake dating, I mean…”
“Oh. But it’s going so well, I thought!” Yuu protests, leaning forward into Asahi’s space. “I think we’re doing well!”
“I suppose we are.” It’s not like they haven’t been having a good time with each other.
“Besides, we can’t break up yet, I haven’t introduced you to my team!” Yuu says, turning back to the television in time to see the hero and his lady friend escape an exploding building.
With that, the conversation seems to be over.
The movie seems to go downhill from there, with lots of long conversations on balconies and in warehouses, and much less action and explosions and fast cars. When the credits finally roll, Asahi glances over at Yuu, only to find him asleep, slumped against Asahi’s side. Asahi is struck by the fact that he didn’t even notice that Yuu was leaning against him. It had just seemed so natural… Also, the boring movie had lulled him into a near unconscious state himself, so maybe that was it.
Asahi lets Yuu sleep against him for as long as he can, reflecting that Yuu should probably get as much sleep as he can, being as busy as he is. Between classes, volleyball practice, violin practice, and his part time job, Yuu probably doesn’t get as much sleep as he should. (Asahi is apparently one of the esteemed few trusted with the secret of Yuu’s violin prowess.)
But eventually, Asahi has to leave for his own job, and wakes Yuu. He is very apologetic for sleeping through their date, Asahi insists that he doesn’t mind. And he doesn’t. It was nice, to just share a space with Yuu. Almost too nice. Asahi is worried that the longer this continues, the less desire he’ll have to end it. Which will make it so much more painful when it does end. Yuu heads back to his dorm, and Asahi bicycles to work, mind busy with thoughts of their fake relationship.
Yuu’s birthday arrives sooner than Asahi is expecting, and with it comes the daunting prospect of meeting Yuu’s team. Some of them are taking him out for dinner after their Saturday night practice, which is actually Yuu’s birthday. Of course, Asahi is invited so the team can meet him.
“Are you nervous?”
Asahi is startled by Yuu’s direct question, and his intense stare. Sometimes it’s almost comical, such a small little person with such a hard look on their face. With his small frame and puffed up hair, he almost looks like an irritated little songbird. It’s easy to forget that Yuu has any strength in him when Asahi can so easily pluck him up and carry him around in his arms.
“Asahi? Do I have something on my face?”
“No! No, you’re fine, sorry. Just spacing out again. I’m a little nervous. Okay, a lot. I mean, what if they don’t buy it? Is this captain scary?”
“He’s not that scary, I promise!”
“Okay… I’m just worried, considering I shattered his hopes and dreams of dating you.”
“Don’t be so dramatic, Asahi! He wasn’t devastated! And I think we make a convincing couple,” Yuu grins widely, and grabs Asahi’s hand. Asahi still isn’t used to it. He is overdressed for the relatively warm October evening, and his hands get sweaty quickly, but Yuu doesn’t seem to mind. Asahi yearns for cold weather and the gloves that accompany it. Gloves conceal a sweaty hand. Of course, by the time winter rolls in, he probably won’t need to hold Yuu’s hand anymore. They probably won’t still be dating. Fake dating.
They arrive at the udon shop, where half the team has apparently already secured a table. According to Yuu, the udon shop had won out over a karaoke place by only a small number of votes. Asahi thanks his lucky stars that he isn’t expected to sing tonight.
“Nishinoya!”
A table full of young men (and two women and one older man) flag them down. They let out a chorus of “Happy Birthday”s, and Asahi is introduced to each member of the team. The two young women are the managers, and the older man is one of the coaches, that apparently thinks it’s appropriate to spend leisure time with the team. Asahi recognizes a few faces from the high school volleyball circuit, including Yahaba Shigeru of Aobajousai, and Yamamoto Taketora of Nekoma. Luckily the entire team isn’t planning on coming, as college teams tend to be rather larger than high school ones. Asahi is just glad that most of the big personalities and weird characters from high school are on Daichi’s team instead.
Tanaka and his sister are coming too of course, although they have yet to arrive.
And of course, there is the captain, Izuki Seijuurou. He is tall and well built, and a little intimidating if Asahi is totally honest. Hopefully there are no hard feelings. He is pretty loud, and grins often. Asahi wonders why Yuu didn’t want to date him. They seem like kindred spirits. Yuu calls him “Izuki-senpai”, and Asahi narrowly avoids making a sour face at that.
“Nice to meet you, Azumane-san! I’ve heard a lot about you!” Izuki greets Asahi boisterously, being the last one introduced.
“Ah, I’ve heard a lot about you too, Izuki-san. It’s nice to finally meet you,” Asahi replies with what he hopes is a reasonable level of enthusiasm. He’s lying anyways, all he’s heard about this guy is that he wants to go out with Yuu. Which is something he should probably pretend to not know.
After some seat shuffling, Asahi and Yuu are slotted in between Yahaba and Izuki. Unfortunately, Izuki is on Yuu’s side. They all order, Yuu ordering for the late Tanaka siblings as well, and the team settles into small conversations among themselves. Asahi finds himself in a conversation with Yahaba, Izuki, and Yuu about, what else, their relationship.
“So you played with these two sometimes in high school, huh?” Izuki is asking Yahaba, leaning forward to see around Asahi.
“Yes, when Nishinoya-san and I were in second year, my captain had a bit of a… rivalry with Karasuno’s first year setter, so we ended up playing more practice games together than we would have regularly. Actually, Oikawa-senpai always said he thought you two would end up dating.” Yahaba has a very calm and polite way of speaking, which softens the rather startling statement.
“What?” Yuu seems to find his voice before Asahi. “I wouldn’t’ve thought we took up that much time in his thoughts!”
“Oh, well, he prides himself on knowing things about people. Especially things that they would rather keep a secret. He can read people very well, which is what makes him such a great setter.”
Another team member, whose name Asahi has already forgotten, raises their voice across the table to say, “Hey, Yahaba-chan, don’t put yourself down! You’re a great setter too!” They turn back to their previous conversation immediately, leaving Yahaba to look sheepishly down at his lap.
Asahi turns to Izuki again, hoping to redirect the conversation. “So what position do you play?”
“Ah, I knew you were just being courteous when you said you’d heard a lot about me,” Izuki replies, a sly look on his face.
“Oh, no! I was just trying to make conversation! I know that you’re…” Asahi glances down at Yuu between them desperately. Yuu simply nods his head towards Asahi. Maybe he means the same position as him? “...a wing spiker…?”
Izuki squints down at Yuu, who flashes him a winning grin.
There is a clatter at the door of the udon place, signalling the arrival of the Tanaka siblings. Asahi is thankful for the distraction. Yuu veritably slithers out of his seat and onto the floor, crawling under the table to pop out from under it on the other side.
“Ryuu!”
“Noya!! Happy Birthday!”
Yuu literally leaps into Tanaka’s arms, to be swung about in the air a couple times. Izuki glances over at Asahi as Yuu is deposited back on the ground to have his hair ruffled by Tanaka’s sister. Asahi suddenly feels as if he has “WE’RE NOT REALLY DATING” written on his face in permanent marker. He and Yuu haven’t acted that affectionate all night. His neck feels hot as he meets Izuki’s eyes.
“That doesn’t make you jealous at all?”
Okay, okay that’s not too bad. It wasn’t like “how come this guy seems much more boyfriendly than you??”
“Oh, well, they’ve always been like that. I trust Yuu. And I certainly don’t trust myself not to drop him if he ever ran and jumped into my arms like that.” While true, Asahi is sure that if they practiced, he could catch Yuu if he ever felt the urge to jump into his arms.
Izuki huffs out a laugh, turning back to Yuu, being crushed against Tanaka’s sister’s rather ample chest in a bear hug. Yuu emerges, hair rather deflated from ruffling, squeezing, and being swung around in the air. Tanaka, being on the team, is already known, but Tanaka Saeko is introduced to the team, and seats are rearranged again. Asahi finds himself between Yuu and Izuki this time, Tanaka’s sister on the other side of Yuu, and Tanaka himself beside her.
The food arrives, although it doesn’t stop the conversation that much, and Asahi can honestly say that he is enjoying himself. Yuu and Tanaka’s sister are deep in conversation, laughing every so often (she’s asked Asahi to call her Saeko, but he hasn’t worked up the courage). Tanaka is having a rather loud conversation across the table with Yamamoto, and thankfully, Izuki seems engrossed in a conversation too, so Asahi is left to eat his udon in peace. So far, it’s going better than he was expecting.
Most of the team members are, in fact, adults, so alcohol litters the table, and faces get rosier and voices get louder. Asahi was worried that the staff would get frustrated, but as it turns out, a team member’s parents own the place, so it is not uncommon to have fifteen to thirty loud volleyball players spread across the back tables. Asahi only has water, but feels himself getting more cheerful and comfortable anyways, as the atmosphere shifts.
Yuu turns back to him when he’s finished his food. He is smiling so brightly, he’s positively glowing. Asahi glances at his drink suspiciously. It had tasted like water, but he’s never thought such sappy poetic nonsense while sober.
“D’you want anything else to eat, Asahi?”
“Oh, I’m full. Are you having fun?”
“Yeah! Yeah, thank you for coming! Sorry, I didn’t mean to ignore you, when I was talking to Saeko,” Yuu says, looking properly concerned, with parts his hair flopping down into his face. His entire torso is twisted to face Asahi.
Feeling at ease in the companionable atmosphere, Asahi laughs and reaches up to brush some of Yuu’s hair off his forehead. “It’s fine, Yuu.”
Asahi feels something shift then, Yuu staring up at him with a serious, earnest expression on his face. Their eyes stay locked in a stare until Saeko snakes an arm around Yuu’s shoulders, drawing him back against her.
“Hey, Yuu-chan, you can stare lovingly at your boyfriend whenever you want!” she teases, ruffling Yuu’s hair again. “C’mon, lemme fix your hair for you.”
With that, she shoves her brother off his bench so she can climb out, turning back to whisper something in Yuu’s ear and wink at Asahi.
Yuu turns back to him, an attentive look on his face. “I promise I’ll pay more attention to you when I get back, okay?”
Before Asahi can reply, Yuu swoops in and plants a kiss on his cheek, before following Saeko towards the back hall. Asahi’s eyes are so wide he can feel them beginning to water, and he clutches his knees tightly with his hands. He hears Saeko say “I meant on the mouth, doofus,” to Yuu before they get out of earshot. Once he has the presence of mind to look around, he is thankful to see that nobody really noticed him acting so weirdly at getting a kiss on the check from the person meant to be his boyfriend. The only person is Tanaka, who is giving him rather an odd sort of unhappy look, but turns away before their eye contact becomes awkward.
True to his word, Yuu does pay Asahi more attention when he returns with freshly spiked hair. Tanaka joins in and they reminisce about their high school days. They don’t talk about the kiss.
It is an entirely enjoyable night, at least until the team disperses at the end of the night. There are the familiar rowdy goodbyes on an otherwise quiet darkened street, groups of team members breaking off in different directions to head home. They decide that Yuu deserves a quiet walk home with his boyfriend, since it is his birthday, but the Tanaka siblings walk with them for a short while. None of them talk about how well it went, that clearly the team was fooled into thinking they really are dating. Instead, Yuu regails them with a retelling of an obscure horror film he saw, and the illusion of dating lasts just a little longer.
When they finally part ways with the siblings, hugs are exchanged, and two more “Happy Birthday”s are said.
“You boys have fun tonight. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” Saeko winks at them, and Tanaka rolls his eyes.
Yuu seems to be a lot more accustomed to her brand of teasing, answering right back with, “What! There are so many dumb things I know you would do! What kind of advice is that?”
Saeko laughs as they walk away. “Well, ya gotta have some fun with your boyfriend on your birthday!”
Yuu and Asahi walk in relatively companionable silence after that. They are not holding hands, and something is bothering Asahi, so he just has to ruin the calm night.
“Why does she do that?”
Yuu looks up at him, a concerned expression on his face. He can probably hear the irritation in Asahi’s voice. “Do what?”
“Saeko-san. Why does she always act like we’re really dating? There’s nobody around to fool, so why does she do it?” Asahi doesn’t know why he’s getting so upset, but he just seems to get more angry the longer he talks.
“She’s… she’s only teasing, Asahi. She isn’t trying to be mean, or anything…” Yuu sounds so quiet and hesitant, Asahi immediately feels bad.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to get upset. I’m not really angry at her.” He’s not sure who he is angry at, but he’s sure there’s someone to blame for how upset he feels. “It’s just- maybe now that I’ve met the team, and you’ve proven you’re not available to Izuki-san, we should stop. The fake dating thing I mean.”
Yuu looks as downtrodden as ever, and they walk in silence for a few blocks. The silence isn’t as comfortable as before, and there’s a horrible rushing sound in Asahi’s ears. His face feels overheated and prickly. Asahi had thought Yuu would have been happy at the prospect of being released from this weird charade. He doesn’t understand why he isn’t.
They are passing a 24-hour corner store when Yuu tugs on his sleeve, silently pointing to the store.
“What, you want to go in?” Asahi asks.
Yuu nods, and Asahi follows him in. There is a man and a woman behind the counter, and a surprising number of people in the store for that time of night. Asahi finds a clock on the wall. It’s almost midnight.
Yuu makes a beeline to the frozen section, and Asahi trails after him, feeling guilty for upsetting Yuu on his birthday. Yuu grabs a popsicle and turns to walk towards the checkout counter.
“Isn’t it a little cold for a popsicle?”
“Asahi, it’s my birthday, okay?” Yuu replies, his tone tired. Asahi hopes it’s because it’s almost midnight, and not because of him.
They stay silent as Yuu pays for his treat, all the way until the front door of Asahi’s apartment building. Yuu has finished the popsicle, and the stick is still hanging from his mouth. Asahi would fuss over him potentially getting splinters in his mouth, but the tension that hangs over them makes Asahi feel like he doesn’t have the right to be nagging him.
Asahi has to clear his throat awkwardly before saying anything, although Yuu continues staring at the pavement. “...Well, I guess-”
Suddenly, Yuu snaps his head up to fix Asahi with an intense stare, tearing the popsicle stick from his mouth. “I just realized, we can’t break up yet, because it’s my birthday! That would be the worst! Anyways, good night Asahi! I’ll text you tomorrow!”
With that, Yuu steps onto the first step up to the door, turns back to Asahi and kisses him on the cheek. This time it is quicker, and noticeably closer to Asahi’s mouth. Then he leaps off the step and bounds down the street, waving energetically. Asahi stands in the light cast from the lamp above the door to his apartment, considering his life choices. His tongue darts out to the corner of his mouth that Yuu touched. It tastes like soda flavouring.
Asahi goes upstairs and goes right to bed.
Yuu sends him a good morning text the next morning, and life goes on. They are apparently still fake dating.
They go on four more “dates” in the month of October. The first three, Asahi tries to break off this whole “fake dating” thing. Each time, Yuu tells him that they can’t break up yet. “Ryuu’s cat just died,” “We still haven’t tried that pastry place that Suga suggested,” and “There’s another team member’s birthday coming up, I have to bring you.”
And it’s not as if Asahi dislikes spending time with Yuu, so he lets him make excuses. The problem is that he likes spending time with Yuu a little too much to be casually fake dating him. His own reasons for breaking up become feebler and feebler.
The fourth date, Yuu has two black eyes from being hit it the face with a volleyball the day before. Yuu claims he was distracted, which Asahi finds difficult to imagine. He has never seen Yuu anything but focused when he’s on the court. Over lunch, Asahi is regaled with the story of how it happened. Apparently it was one of the other team’s strongest spikers, there was a lot of blood, and Yuu even passed out. Asahi is so horrified, all thoughts of breaking up leave his head. Yuu hadn’t gone to the doctor, and so the date ends there. He has a mild concussion. Asahi’s sure that if he suggests breaking up now, Yuu would say that they can’t break up yet, because he has a concussion. So Asahi doesn’t bother. He’d feel bad about breaking up with Yuu when he’s concussed anyways.
Even though Yuu is supposed to be taking it easy the next two weeks, they both go out with the team to the same udon place for another birthday. Asahi spends most of the night talking to Yahaba Shigeru, and Yuu spends most of the night sleeping on Asahi or Tanaka’s shoulder. Asahi finds it difficult to concentrate with the weight of Yuu’s head on his shoulder, but finds his side cold when Yuu is resting on Tanaka instead. Asahi hopes this uncharacteristic napping isn’t a result of Yuu overworking himself while suffering from a concussion.
Asahi offers to take Yuu home, as Tanaka has to work early the next morning. Asahi makes it halfway to his own apartment with a sleeping Yuu on his back when he realizes he still has no idea where Yuu’s dorms are. He stands on the sidewalk in the cold for a few moments, amazed at his own absent-mindedness, before sighing and continuing to his own apartment.
Suga is lying on the floor in the front room, reading, when Asahi finally maneuvers his way into their apartment, mumbling a quiet “I’m home.” Suga glances over and sits up when he spots Yuu slumped over Asahi’s shoulders.
“Welcome home! Is he alright?”
Asahi nods, trying to shake his shoes off without dropping Yuu on the ground.
Suga laughs, coming over to help Asahi with his shoes. “Had too much to drink?”
“No. He doesn’t drink. He always tells people he’s allergic, but the truth is- never mind. I think he told me that in confidence. Sorry,” Asahi mumbles, letting Suga untie his laces like he’s five years old. The truth is that Yuu’s father had problems with alcohol, and Yuu doesn’t want to take any chances of ending up like him. Just one of many facts Asahi has learned about Yuu over the last two and a half months. Has it really been two and a half months?
A helpful fact to know would be where Yuu’s dorms are, but life never really goes perfectly for Asahi.
Now shoeless, Asahi stumbles over to the chair in the corner and deposits Yuu on it. He stretches his arms, which were seriously cramping at that point. He’s just lucky he stays in shape lifting heavy packages and bicycling around the city, or he might not have made it, even carrying the relatively small load that is Nishinoya Yuu. He sighs, staring down at the still sleeping libero.
“Is he staying here?”
“I don’t know where his dorm is.”
“Still? It’s been like, three months!”
“Two and a half,” Asahi sighs again.
Suga claps Asahi on the back, letting out a bark of a laugh. “If you had a backbone, you might be out of this situation.”
“Ugh.” Asahi looks at Suga with an exaggerated frown. “You sound like Daichi.”
“Well, since he’s away at that training camp, someone has to give you a hard time. Noya can stay here. We’ll give him Daichi’s bed.”
“No! Um, can’t he take yours or something?”
“Why, you don’t want to be in the same room as him? Fine, you take my bed, I’ll take Daichi’s, and Noya can have yours. How’s that?”
“Fine. I’m going to go brush my teeth.”
Asahi leaves to do just that, but also stare at himself in the mirror for longer than necessary.
The apartment is a two bedroom (it was all they could afford, even with the money their parents chipped in), and when they first moved in, they drew straws to see who would share and who would get their own room. Suga’s room is smaller, maybe even a little cramped, and Daichi and Asahi share the main bedroom. They entertained the idea of a bunk-bed, but neither felt safe sleeping on the top level, so two separate beds were purchased, along with Suga’s.
Suga has moved Yuu into Asahi’s bed by the time Asahi has finished staring himself down in the mirror, and is waiting for him in the hall, arms crossed. Asahi knows he is in for a scolding of some kind.
“Asahi,” Suga sighs, “if you really don’t want to continue with this fake dating scheme… If you make it clear how uncomfortable you are, Noya will understand.”
“I’m not uncomfortable Suga… It’s just. Well, you know how I feel.”
Suga continues in a quiet voice, as if Yuu isn’t out like a light and might be woken up by raised voices. “I do know. Why don’t you tell him how you feel?”
Asahi tries to convey how dumb an idea that is with just his face. It seems to work, and Suga rolls his eyes.
“Look Asahi. This is all very noble and self-sacrificing of you, but things can’t stay like this. Something has to change. Either confess, or break it off. This dance has gone on long enough. This isn’t good for either of you. Now go to bed. Don’t look in my bedside drawer. Good night.”
Feeling like he just got told off by his mother, Asahi shuffles into Suga’s room, his metaphorical tail between his legs. As he lies in Suga’s bed that smells of his funny-smelling shampoo, Asahi wonders what secrets lurk in Suga’s bedside drawer, and resolves to break it off with Yuu before December comes.
The next morning, Asahi wakes later than usual, thankful he doesn’t work until Sunday afternoons. When he gets out into the hall, he can hear the shower running, so he sneaks by and into his room. The beds are both empty of people, and his bed is also missing the duvet. Odd. He hurriedly gets changed into some fresh house clothes, worried that at any moment Suga or Yuu will come through the door and catch him with his pants down. Nobody does, and Asahi makes his way into the kitchen, where he finds his duvet standing at the counter in front of the coffee pot.
Eloquent as ever, Asahi tries to discern why his duvet has become sentient. “Uh…”
His duvet turns, to reveal Yuu, snuggled deep within it, his hair wet. “Oh. Good morning. Suga told me why I’m here, don’t worry. Sorry you had to carry me all the way here.”
“It’s fine, you’re not that heavy… Coffee?”
“It’s almost ready,” Yuu says, turning back to the machine.
He had looked fairly sharp-eyed, well rested, although that may be a result of the shower he probably had, judging by his wet hair. Asahi had forgotten how cute Yuu looks with his hair down.
“Are… are you alright? You were unconscious most of the night last night… Is it because of the concussion?” Asahi remains standing awkwardly in the doorway of the kitchen, watching his duvet move subtly with Yuu’s movements.
“Oh, the doctor says I’m fine now. I was just tired. Too many late nights in a row.”
Yuu pours coffee into three mugs, and hands one to Asahi. Before Asahi can take it, the mug is retracted. “Shoot. I didn’t even ask if this is your mug…” Yuu mumbles, staring down at the coffee.
It’s technically Suga’s, but it’s not his favourite, so Asahi should be safe using it. “It’s fine. Suga has quite a collection. Just make sure you give him the frog mug.”
“Right.” Yuu picks up the non-frog mug for himself, and spoons about half the sugar bowl into it. Asahi winces. And yet, Yuu claims he has never had a cavity ever in his life.
The duvet slumps off Yuu’s shoulders to bunch up at his folded elbows as he sips his coffee, exposing the horrible truth. Yuu is wearing one of Asahi’s shirts. As if that alone weren’t bad enough, Asahi’s shirt doesn’t fit Yuu’s small frame, and one of his shoulders is entirely bare thanks to the wide collar slipping off and down his arm. Asahi glares down at his coffee, telling himself that this isn’t a big deal. Yuu could hardly put his dirty clothes from yesterday on after his shower. This isn’t a big deal.
“Why did you come out? If you were so tired?” Asahi asks, finally finding his voice. He has to distract himself somehow.
“Um. I wanted to see you,” Yuu says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
Suga arrives just in time, saving Asahi from verbalizing his initial thought of “what the hell is that supposed to mean??” Yuu just wanted to see him?? Not the rest of his team? He came out for Asahi, specifically?? That is definitely not something one says to a fake boyfriend!! Standing in Asahi’s kitchen, wearing Asahi’s clothes, wrapped up in Asahi’s duvet, his hair all wet and cute, saying nonsense like that! What is Asahi supposed to think?
They all drink their coffee together in the quiet kitchen, but Asahi’s thoughts are as loud as ever.
It is near the end of November that Asahi develops an exit strategy. He has finally been invited over to Yuu’s dorm room, which, if Asahi’s being honest, is a little small and sad. Yuu doesn’t have a roommate, and no windows in the room. Like living in a box. It would be torture for anyone, but especially someone like Yuu. It honestly isn’t as messy as Asahi was expecting, but Yuu could have cleaned up before he arrived. Is that something one does when expecting their fake boyfriend for a visit? Asahi really isn’t sure what the rules are anymore.
There is nowhere to sit but the bed, so they sit cross-legged across from each other and play old board games Yuu had stuffed under his bed. Yuu is talking about the team, when the topic of the captain comes up again. Who… Yuu has quite a lot of praise for. He’s even calling him “Seijuurou-senpai” now, instead of just “Izuki-senpai”. Asahi manages to blame his sour face at that revelation on the game they’re playing. If Yuu likes this guy so much, Asahi wonders, why didn’t he agree to go out with him? So he asks.
“I dunno… I just don’t want to…”
“You clearly admire him, though.”
“Yeah. I mean, it wouldn’t be awful to date him. But, whatever, it’s too late now anyways, right?”
Wrong.
If Asahi can get Yuu to like this Izuki Seijuurou that he already thinks is so cool, then they’ll have to break up. Yuu is the one who is always stopping them from breaking up this fake relationship, so if he wants to leave, then he’ll agree next time Asahi suggests. Maybe Yuu will even suggest breaking up. Asahi doesn’t like that idea very much though. It would almost be like Yuu saying that he’s tired of him, that Asahi has fulfilled his purpose and will now be disposed of. No, that does not sound very nice.
Nonetheless, the plan is set.
This Izuki would probably be a better boyfriend than Asahi anyways.
November passes with no progress made. Asahi keeps trying to bring up Izuki in conversation, but Yuu is probably getting suspicious.
December arrives with winter on its heels, and Yuu is swallowed alive by exams and assignments he’s been putting off til last minute, so Asahi doesn’t see him much. They still text every day, and Asahi begins to reconsider his plan. It’s nice the way things are. Until Yuu asks for another date, after his exams are over, to celebrate. Why are they still going on dates? Haven’t they perfected their act well enough if the team suddenly wants another viewing of the spectacle? Yuu could at least say he just wanted to hang out, but no. He calls it a date.
Asahi agrees to the date. He has accepted his fate as a weak-willed person, especially when it comes to Yuu.
Yuu’s last exam is in the evening, from 7:00-10:00 pm. Asahi thinks that it’s a barbaric time to force people to write exams, and it makes him glad he isn’t going to college. He has requested that Yuu text him when he gets safely back to his dorm.
Yuu calls him instead.
“...Hello?”
“Asahi! Hi!! I’m freeeee!! Also, I made it back to my dorm room alright. Thank you for worrying.”
Yuu sounds elated and jubilant, and the prospect of seeing his radiant smile makes Asahi excited to see Yuu in two days. Maybe this isn’t so bad after all.
The day of their date, Yuu calls him in the morning. He’s sick, and he can’t come. Asahi suggests that he could come over, but surprisingly, Yuu insists that he should probably be resting. Yuu’s voice is strained and scratchy, so the phone call is cut short.
Asahi had resigned himself to not seeing Yuu, but after work, he’s struck again with the urge to see him. He can’t imagine Yuu is having a good time right now, cooped up in his dorm room, all alone. Sick people need to be cared for. What if he needs food or drink? Asahi resolves to pick up some food and go over, for a short visit.
Of course, things never go as planned for Asahi, and as he’s waiting for his order to be prepared at the usual udon place, he meets the eye of one Izuki Seijuurou. Damn. And no one else had recognized him so far, even the waitress who gushed over his hair both times he was here before.
“Hey, Azumane-san! What brings you here? Food, I imagine… Where’s Noya?” Izuki grins at him, leaning on the counter.
“He’s sick actually. I’m going to bring him some food.”
“Ah, what a lovely gesture,” Izuki says, and Asahi can’t tell if he’s being sarcastic or not. “Is he very poorly?”
“I don’t actually know, I haven’t seen him face-to-face since before his exams.”
Asahi hates talking with people he’s only acquainted with.
“Are you staying long, or just a quick visit?”
“Quick visit, hopefully. He should be resting.” Asahi can’t help but feel like Izumi is trying to get something out of him.
A horrible awkward silence follows, provoking Asahi to make an even more horrible mistake.
“Would… would you like to come?”
Izuki looks surprised. “I...is that really okay? You two are still dating, right? I wouldn’t want to butt in.”
“It’s not like this is an actual date, he’s sick,” Asahi says, avoiding the dating question in a way he’s rather proud of. “I’m sure he’d be happy to see you, he talks about you all the time. You know, he really admires you.”
“He does, huh?”
It appears the plan is back in action without Asahi really intending it to be.
“Okay, I’ll come, but only if you’re sure.”
Great.
“I’m sure.”
He sees the man behind the counter packaging up what must be his food, and is about to breathe a sigh of relief when he hears yet another familiar voice.
“Oi, Asahi!”
Oh, wonderful. It’s Daichi and half his team.
Asahi hastily explains his presence in the udon shop to Daichi and the hungry eyes of Oikawa Tooru and Kuroo Tetsurou peering over his shoulder. Daichi returns to the rest of his team to order, and Oikawa is dragged away by his burly gruff companion. Iwaizumi... something. Based on the “Hajime”s Oikawa is whining in protest, it must be Iwaizumi Hajime. Kuroo remains, apparently friendly enough with Izuki to start up a conversation.
Luckily, both Asahi’s and Izuki’s food arrives on the counter in front of them before the conversation can get too in depth.
“Where’re you two off to then?” Kuroo asks, fixing them both with his sly-eyed smirk.
“Noya’s.” Izuki squints back at Kuroo.
“You’re- you’re both going?”
Kuroo doesn’t seem to want to move out of the way, and Yuu’s food is getting cold. Asahi makes another foolish decision.
“What, you want to come too or something?” he practically snaps at Kuroo.
Kuroo just turns to him with his eyebrows raised. “So you’re telling me that you are going over to Nishinoya’s.” He turns to point at Izuki. “And so are you? Together. And Nishinoya will be there? Wow. Damn, y’know, as much as I would absolutely love to see that shitshow, Kenma and Keiji will kill me if I don’t go home and at least pretend to study for my exam tomorrow. See ya round.”
Too concerned with the food getting cold, Asahi bustles past the retreating Kuroo, not even bothering to interpret his remark. Izuki follows him out after making a few choice gestures at Kuroo.
They talk about volleyball and Izuki’s captaincy on the walk over, and Asahi is endlessly grateful for the common ground. Asahi texts Yuu, in case he’s asleep or undressed or something. He doesn’t mention that he has Izuki with him for some reason. Just: I hope you don’t mind, but I’m coming over with some food and drinks for you. And tissues. I promise I won’t stay long. He could have, probably should have, mentioned that Izuki is coming too.
But he doesn’t, and Yuu looks quite caught off guard to see two visitors instead of one when he opens the door to his room. Yuu is wrapped haphazardly in a blanket, a medical mask over his nose and mouth, and his hair somewhere in between styled and unstyled, some up, some down.
“Oh,” is all he says at the sight of them, bringing a hand up over his pained face.
Izuki glances at Asahi. “Did you not tell him I was coming too?”
Yuu saves Asahi from an awkward fate, waving his hand at them. “No, no, it’s not you. Just. Headache. Come in.”
Izuki goes in first, leaving Asahi to meet Yuu’s suspicious glare. Asahi shrugs, trying to escape from any blame laid upon him.
Asahi quickly volunteers to take the food down to the common room to warm it up in the microwave, leaving Yuu and Izuki to wait for him in the dorm room. When he comes back they are chatting amicably on Yuu’s bed. Asahi knows he should feel better about this. Everything is going according to plan. But seeing Yuu enjoying himself with the charming and confident Izuki Seijuurou just makes Asahi feel inadequate.
The mood as they eat is dampened by Yuu’s sickness and Asahi’s gloomy expression. He and Izuki stay a little longer, to keep Yuu company, and the board games are brought out again. Izuki and Yuu sit beside each other across the board from Asahi. It seems that Asahi isn’t being as subtle as he thinks he is, and both Izuki and Yuu seem to find the seating arrangement suspicious.
Soon Yuu is swaying in his spot, clearly sleepy but trying not to fall against Izuki. He eventually succumbs, sinking against Izuki’s side, head drooping. Izuki lets Yuu rest there for a few minutes before looking down at him.
“Noya? Noya.” Izuki snaps his fingers by Yuu’s ears and even pinches his nose through the medical mask before turning to Asahi. “Why are you doing this?”
Asahi glances at Yuu, still sleeping against Izuki. “What am I doing?”
“You know I like him, don’t you? The entire fucking volleyball circuit knows, and you live with Sawamura, right? So you know. Shouldn’t you be stopping stuff like this?” Izuki gestures to Yuu, his face and tone confrontational. “Are you trying to get rid of him or something? Push him off onto me?”
“Oh...look it’s… not like that, really. I just. He talks about you all the time, so I thought he’d be happier with you,” Asahi mumbles, not meeting Izuki’s stare. It doesn’t sound as legitimate a reason when Izuki thinks they’re really truly dating, but Asahi doesn’t want to blow their cover.
“What? So, you’re telling me you don’t like him?”
“No! I do. So much. But… I don’t think he likes me.” Well, Asahi knows that, but since they’re supposed to be dating, his arguments just get weaker and weaker. He’s feeling so guilty he’s just confessing his feelings about Yuu to a relative stranger! Why did he do that!
“Can I be frank? That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. What gives you the right to just assume that he doesn’t return your feelings? You think he’s the kind of person to jerk you along? If you’re worried, just fucking talk to him, geez.” Izuki looks at Asahi, his expression almost sympathetic now. “Besides, you’re wrong anyways. He adores you. I thought he talked about you a lot before, but now that we’ve all met you, he chatters on and on about you all the time. It’s clear to anyone who meets him how much he cares about you. And honestly, from what I’ve seen of you, you aren’t nearly as cool and wonderful as he thinks you are. No offence. I’m more inclined to belief Sawamura when he says you’re a wuss.”
Asahi stays silent, trying to process what was just said. Izuki gets up slowly, lowering Yuu’s torso carefully, until he’s lying back on the bed.
“Look, I’m gonna go, okay?”
Asahi looks up at Izuki and nods silently. He leaves the dorm room quietly, and the door clicks shut behind him. Yuu stays asleep, giving Asahi plenty of time to explain away everything Izuki said. Yeah, Yuu probably talks about him sometimes, but only because he respects him, for his skill as a fellow volleyball player.
At the same time, something else Izuki said rings true for Asahi. Yuu isn’t a bad person. Sure, he can be brash and not think things through sometimes. But like Suga said, Yuu would let him out of the relationship if Asahi made it clear that he is truly uncomfortable. Like Izuki said, Yuu wouldn’t just be “jerking him along” if this was a real relationship. Yuu isn’t a bad person. Something both Suga and Izuki advised him to do is tell Yuu how he feels. If both Suga, Asahi’s most trusted advisor, and Izuki, who shares Asahi’s... regard for Yuu, are telling him the same thing…. Maybe he should do it. Asahi knows Yuu. He knows he won’t make Asahi feel bad for feeling the way he does. He won’t cut Asahi out of his life for confessing. And at this point, Yuu probably has a right to know. After three and a half months of fake dating, Yuu deserves to know. It would be a weight off his chest. And Asahi could then explain why he was acting so strangely! As he sits on Yuu’s bed, watching him sleep peacefully across an abandoned board game, the idea of confessing his feelings seems more and more appealing.
But, as Daichi has apparently been telling the entire college volleyball circuit, Asahi can be a wuss. The idea seems less appealing with Yuu’s sharp golden eyes staring him down.
“What did you want to tell me?” Yuu prompts Asahi, but it’s too late. He’s chickened out.
“Oh, only that Izuki just left. I need to get going too.”
“I see.” Yuu sounds suspicious.
“I hope you feel better soon.”
Asahi is struck by the urge to kiss Yuu on the cheek before he leaves, but valiantly resists, and hastily leaves with a wave instead.
The next time they see each other, it is on New Year’s Eve, and Daichi’s birthday, at the annual Daichi and Asahi’s Birthday Party and New Year’s Celebration. Last year, they went out to three different clubs, but (mostly) everyone agreed that it was too much, so this year it is a simple house party. It’s being hosted by Oikawa, in his father’s house. Asahi is hesitant, but Oikawa insists he obtained his father’s permission. Asahi only believes it when Daichi backs Oikawa up. Oikawa and Kuroo were apparently some of the few who thought clubbing was still a viable option. Asahi is not surprised.
Something is wrong between Asahi and Yuu. Looking back, Asahi realizes Yuu had been smiling less lately. Looking more concerned, even suspicious of Asahi at times. (Which he had every reason to be, Asahi reflects.) After the visit with Izuki when Yuu was sick, Yuu texts him less and less, sometimes even missing the good morning and good night texts. Asahi would have assumed that Yuu has lost interest in him, if not for how subdued he’d been acting lately.
So Asahi puts his plan to confess up on the shelf with his Izuki-centred plan, and decides to focus on figuring out what’s upsetting Yuu at the party.
Asahi arrives with Suga and Daichi to the house. It is much larger than he is expecting, but Suga and Daichi seem unphased. Asahi supposes they do know Oikawa better than he does, so maybe they’re used to it. He realizes that even though it’s called Daichi and Asahi’s Birthday Party and New Year’s Celebration, most (if not all) of the people will be here for Daichi, not him.
Yet the banner in the entrance hall still reads “Daichi and Asahi’s Birthday Party and New Year’s Celebration” in cutesy block letters, with drawn fireworks and glitter positively dripping off it. Being the men of the party, he and Daichi are greeted by every person that passes them by, even people neither of them seem to know. As soon as Oikawa spots them, he sweeps over to greet them, trailed by some sort of entourage consisting of other setters.
“Dai-chan, Asahi-san! Happy birthday to you,” Oikawa calls, pointing at Daichi. “And a premature happy birthday to you,” he says, turning towards Asahi. He is handed two pointy party hats by a short boy with watchful golden eyes and badly dyed roots. Familiar, but Asahi isn’t given enough time to search for his name before Oikawa is snapping a party hat onto his head.
“There! Now everyone will know who the birthday boys are!” Oikawa smiles, clapping his hands together. “I don’t know if you remember everyone, let me introduce you…”
Two hours later, Asahi is sitting on a sofa with a drink in his hand, exhausted from socializing. He hasn’t even seen Yuu, never mind asked him what’s wrong. Maybe he isn’t coming. Asahi hadn’t seen Tanaka either, even though most of their team is milling around somewhere. He had heard the distinctive sound of Yamamoto’s yelling, and Yahaba had been with Oikawa. Asahi had even seen Izuki, but luckily ducked out of the room before he was spotted.
Taking a quick sip of his drink, Asahi draws out his phone, partly to appear unavailable for conversation, partly to check to see if Yuu had texted him. No new messages. By ten thirty pm, Asahi has scrolled through all his old text messages from Yuu, and it’s honestly just making him feel worse.
“Shouldn’t you be with your boyfriend?”
Asahi nearly jumps clear off the sofa at the sudden voice behind him. He whirls around to find Tanaka Saeko laughing at him. She reaches up to push her sunglasses off her face and up into her hair, and her eyes are scrunched up with laughter.
“Relax, kid. It’s only me!”
“Oh… sorry, I was just spacing out. Wait. Is Yuu here then?”
“Yeah, we just got here,” Saeko grins, walking around the sofa to stand in front of Asahi. “Can I ask you something?”
“Um, okay. I need to find Yuu soon though.”
“I know.” Saeko smiles at him, her eyes soft and thoughtful. “I’ll be quick. You like Yuu-chan, right? I mean, you wish you were dating for real.”
Asahi glances around furtively at the assorted party guests around the room, but there’s nobody of particular importance. He might as well be honest.
“Yes.”
“Tell him. Trust me. It’s almost midnight, so you need to find him quickly. I won’t have my Yuu-chan not having anyone to kiss. Now, I need to go find Taketora-kun. Good luck!” Saeko winks at him before striding out of the room, hands thrust into the pockets of her leather jacket.
Asahi has no idea where Yuu is of course. It is almost eleven when Asahi finally catches sight of him. It’s very difficult to find short people in crowds of tall people. Just as Asahi is about to walk over to him, he is suddenly flanked by Izuki and Kuroo.
“Azumane! Happy Birthday!” they cry in unison, clearly drunk. Kuroo shuffles off almost immediately, back to his loud spiky-haired friend who is yelling at Daichi, but Izuki stays with his arm draped over Asahi’s shoulder.
Across the room, Yuu catches Asahi’s eye, and begins to make his way over. He looks hesitant and worried, and Asahi doesn’t even hear what Izuki is saying beside him. When Yuu arrives in front of them, Asahi tunes back in.
“Noya! Hey, Azumane, have you told him yet?” Izuki asks, jostling Asahi roughly.
Asahi tries not to look too harried. “No, not yet!”
Izuki laughs loudly, withdrawing his arm to clap Asahi on the back heavily. “Well, get to it!”
He then takes Asahi’s drink from him and saunters off. Asahi watches him go, trying to put off meeting the stare of a strangely silent Yuu. Finally, he is forced to meet his fierce stare.
“Asahi. I need to talk to you. You’ve… ugh. You and Seijuurou-senpai have been getting friendly. I really don’t want to jump to conclusions, but I also don’t want to just not address this...”
Asahi does not like where this is going.
“Anyways... if you like him, then that’s fine,” Yuu finishes, looking off to the side.
Wow. That’s… quite a conclusion to jump to. Although, Asahi has been fixating on Izuki lately, but not because he’s interested in him!
“Oh, no. No, no, you honestly couldn’t be more wrong…” Asahi stares at Yuu in horror. “I am not interested in Izuki-san! I was trying to get you to be interested in him! I’m not into him at all, I promise.”
“Why did you want me to be interested in him?”
“So… so we could break up…” Asahi winces, hating how cowardly and manipulative this plan seems in hindsight.
“Oh. Oh, of course.” Yuu covers his face with his hands briefly and sighs, short but ragged. “God, I’m so sorry Asahi. Of course. You asked every other day to break up, but I just always shut you down. I thought when you stopped asking… Fuck, I’m so sorry. I said you could back out at any time but I didn’t let you. That’s why you were acting so distant… I thought...” Yuu looks up at Asahi, his eyes earnest, his face the most remorseful Asahi’s ever seen it. “Look, this isn’t an excuse, but it’s just… it’s just something you should know, okay? I… I like you. That’s why I never wanted to break up. I loved spending time with you, and texting you all the time, and getting to hold hands and kiss you and give you presents. I swear I wasn’t lying to you about Seijuurou-senpai confessing and everything, at the beginning. But once we really were fake dating, it was so much like real dating that I forgot to keep my distance and just… I’m so sorry Asahi. I’m gonna go now. Consider us officially broken up. Happy New Year. Happy Birthday.”
Asahi watches Yuu’s form slip away into the crowd, too shocked to stop him. When he finally gathers his wits, he realizes why everyone was telling him to confess. They knew. Of course Suga knew, and Daichi too probably. Izuki knew, and Saeko. Hell, even Oikawa Tooru knew, if what Yahaba said was true.
Nobody has seen Yuu apparently, as Asahi rushes around asking. Half of the people he asks are too drunk anyways. He’s scouring the second floor (avoiding any closed bedroom doors), and finds the same small setter from before, with the badly dyed roots, playing on his phone alone in the hall. Asahi’s about to leave him be when he speaks, not looking up from his phone.
“If you’re looking for Nishinoya, he’s on the fire escape. Two rooms over, across from the blue-tiled bathroom. Good luck.”
“Oh… uh, thank you.”
Just how many people knew about him and Yuu and just let them continue being oblivious? Asahi supposes he appreciates them not meddling in his business but still. He can’t even remember that person’s name, yet they knew all about him and Yuu.
Asahi finds the room, and nervousness takes him for a moment, until he realizes that he has nothing to be nervous about. Out the window, he can see a small figure huddled on the fire escape landing, legs folded up against his chest. Asahi can hear the pulse of music and chatter of people from downstairs and down the hall, takes a deep breath, and smiles.
Asahi manages to walk across the carpeted room quietly, and is standing arms-length away from Yuu, still inside, when he starts speaking.
“Yuu?”
He jumps at the sound of his name, lifting his head from where it was bowed against his knees. He looks up at Asahi’s face through the open window, and it’s too dark to see his expression. Maybe Asahi should have turned the light on in the room…
“Oh,” Yuu says, before sniffing and wiping his hoodie sleeve over his face. “Sorry. I know I said I’d leave, but Saeko’s my ride, and I don’t wanna drag her and Ryuu away from the party. I thought I’d just make myself scarce.”
“That’s okay. I’m glad you didn’t leave.” Asahi smiles down at Yuu, although the darkness probably shrouds his expression too. “I feel the same way. That’s why I was acting stand-offish, or whatever you said. Because as much as I loved going on dates with you, I always had to keep in mind that it wasn’t real. So let’s date for real now, if you want to.”
Yuu swings his legs inside and ducks in through the window to stand in front of Asahi. “Are you serious?”
Asahi nods, and suddenly Yuu has flung himself into Asahi’s arms, hugging him tightly around his middle. “Of course I want to date for real!” Yuu yells enthusiastically, the volume muffled by the fact that Yuu has his face pressed hard into Asahi’s chest.
Before Asahi can mumble a dumb comment in reply, there is a sudden uproar from downstairs, and Yuu leans back to look at Asahi in confusion. Asahi is equally confused until Yuu reaches to check his phone.
“Oh! It’s midnight!” Yuu grins up at him, holding his phone up in Asahi’s face as evidence. “We should kiss!”
So they do, and it feels so wonderful to finally be pressing his lips against Yuu’s, Asahi’s almost glad it took them so long to figure it all out. The suspense just makes it that much sweeter.
Yuu is beaming when they pull apart, arms still slung around Asahi’s neck. His face goes solemn then, and he looks seriously into Asahi’s eyes. “You’re sure you want to do this for real?” he asks.
Asahi smiles down at Yuu. “Of course I’m sure. Besides,” he whispers, “we can’t break up yet. It’s my birthday.”
Yuu’s smile returns, brighter than ever.
“Happy birthday.”