Chapter Text
Say you doubt if it feels right
Put it on hold when you need time
Covered all the fears
Holding onto hope
Put it on hold when you need time
But when you called
I've been wanting to say
I got all the patience in the world
If it's not now, or anywhere soon
I'll still be around
Never let this go (Tom Frane)
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The heat wave hit his body with almost lethal force, causing his mouth to salivate and his skin to be covered in a layer of sticky sweat as a mechanism to cool down from the atrocious temperatures. There was the sound of a water bottle next to him being opened, and then the cold tap of the container against his bare shoulder.
"Thank you," Jay mumbled, accepting the offered bottle and gulping down its contents. "We should have waited until the temperatures dropped a bit before coming back."
"Oh, come on, Jay, Agrabah was much warmer during the day," Gil replied with a pat on Jay's sweaty shoulder, discarding his empty bottle in the nearby trash can.
"When we went to Agrabah we hadn't spent the last three months surrounded by snow up to our necks!" Protested Jay, flagging down a cab waiting for passengers outside the airport.
"Well, Evie wants her wedding on this date and she would kill you if you missed it," said Gil, shoving both their bags into the trunk of the cab before they got into the car.
"To the royal palace, please," said Jay, grateful for the car's air conditioning. If the rate was higher because of that, he didn't care. "Why would she have decided on such a date to get married?"
"Maybe she likes the heat," Gil suggested with naïve sincerity, and Jay laughed wearily.
In the beginning, when they both planned the trip and had everything ready, one of Jay's biggest worries had been that they would end up bored since they would only have each other's company. He had been very wrong.
Gil was always witty, fascinated by the world around him that had been a mystery to his eyes all his life, asking as many questions as a small child and giving his opinion with a gentleness that humanity would label as pure strangeness. Jay had developed a deep affection for the one who was now his friend, his companion, family even.
"Evie doesn't like anything that might ruin her perfect makeup and this heat makes you sweat like you're a freshly wet towel being wrung out by a giant," Jay replied, the amusement almost tangible in his words.
"I guess we'll know why soon enough," Gil added after a few seconds of trying to offer alternatives and coming up empty. "By the way, why should we stay in the palace? I thought you said you had a house you bought with the reward, along with your bike."
"Bride's demands," Jay explained with a sigh, smiling as he remembered the shouts of Evie barking orders at everyone. "She wants us to be together and now that Ben is the king, the palace was a logical offer. After the wedding we can go home. Do you have a place to stay yet?"
"Uma said she had a room with my name on it in her house and Cassandra also insisted. Anyway, the crown transferred a reward to us too, so I guess I can buy a house. Or a boat!"
The excitement on Gil's face at the prospect of buying something so big with his own money made Jay guffaw fondly. It was adorable to see him in love with life and Jay was pleased to have helped show him the world.
The preparations had gone fairly quickly. Gil had no social problems and his documents were rushed through the formalities thanks to Mal's intervention. Jay had money to begin the trip and Gil had a map on which to point out their destinations with his eyes closed, so there was no more waiting.
A week after the barrier fell, they both took off in a plane knowing they would not be returning to Auradon anytime soon.
Agrabah was among the first destinations they visited, allowing Jay to reconnect with his roots. They then traveled to Corona, where Gil decided to climb the outside of the tower where Rapunzel had been imprisoned and was now a tourist exhibit. They were imprisoned and Jay had to call Anvelin to talk to his parents to get them out of jail. King Eugene did not stop laughing all night.
Lonnie took them into her home in China for a while, showing him their culture and traditions. Jay and Gil had to follow Mulan and Shang's rigorous training schedule, but there was no shortage of laughter despite the muscle pain and bruises. Jay decided not to extend the visit too long, embarking on his journey to Snow White's Enchanted Forest.
Carlos had been a natural with animals, but seeing Gil smiling as he was surrounded by the forest animals was a surreal experience for Jay. Sure, a rabbit as a hat for hours made Gil's neck hurt like hell, but camping out in the dark depths of the forest felt cozy in some strange way.
London greeted Gil and Jay with a dreary air that seemed to plunge them a hundred years into the past, but their clandestine nights, if you could call it that, dragged them through laughter, good company and quantities of alcohol that wouldn't let them move the next morning.
The depths of the jungle with its dangers was the next stop, and Jay maybe or maybe not ended up screaming as he was chased by a tribe of cannibals. That is if you took his word for it, because Gil claimed they had been very nice people.
Traveling through Latin America and learning of their ancient civilizations and customs was a journey into the past that none of them expected to feel so deep inside. Having been deprived of their own histories and cultures in the confinement in which they had been born, it was a breath of fresh air to see what humanity had inherited to current generations. A legacy.
They discovered no new lost civilizations, but the beauty of Atlantis stole their breath as quickly as Jay used to steal a lamp. It was there, with the ancient techniques of its inhabitants, that Jay and Gil got their first tattoos: a tracing of lines whose meaning remained a secret between them and their tattoo artists.
Audrey's invitation to spend a week of the trip with her in her family castle caught them off guard, but Gil and Jay gladly accepted, also interested in preventing Audrey from isolating herself from society and her conviction from having more negative than positive effects. As it turned out, the week was a release granted to Audrey for good behavior and progress in her therapy. Gil and Jay saw her off back to the reformatory on the last day, before riding another plane away.
Bioluminescent beaches, black sands, dangerous heights, crystal clear waters, swimming with sharks, mountain climbs, deep caves, historical monuments and castles of yesteryear. Jay and Gil traveled and consumed the history of the world, its cultures, life beyond a barrier both physical and mental.
Snow was their last destination, touring the streets of Arandell in their winter season, courtesy of the former Queen Elsa. To their good fortune, Prince David, son of Queen Anna and King Kristoff, personally gave them tours around the kingdom and Gil fell sitting on his buttocks as he was idiotized by the water spirit horse that Elsa rode over the sea to reach them.
Their adventures had been magnificent and Jay was sure they would both be short of time to recount in detail everything they had experienced in that year and a half, but it felt good to be back home. There's no place like home, some said, and Jay understood the depth of those words when the castle rose imposingly in front of him as the cab approached the entrance guarded by guards who allowed them to pass as they recognized Gil and Jay.
They had talked to their friends, because Uma and Cassandra would go on a bloody crusade to take Jay down if they suspected Gil was in the slightest bit of danger and had no news of him, and because Evie had to fulfill her role as the gang's mother and keep Jay reporting their location. It hadn't been enough.
Their schedules didn't always coincide, sometimes they barely had time to send a photo and a small text and fall asleep from exhaustion. There were stops on their travels where they had no phone reception, followed by much hysterical screaming when they finally managed to communicate and threats by Mal to come get them in her dragon form and fly them back with her.
The truth was that neither of them had much knowledge of what was going on in their friends' lives until three days earlier, when Jay received an unexpected call from Evie asking him to come home for her wedding. Jay knew she was engaged to Dough, but he hadn't heard any news about the wedding until that moment. Still, neither he nor Gil hesitated to buy a plane ticket and thank Arandell's hospitality before flying back to Auradon.
Now, standing at the entrance of the castle with their suitcases in their hands, nerves took control of their bodies.
"We'll have to go in, I guess," commented Gil, letting out a nervous chuckle that made Jay bristle.
"Sure, let's go," said Jay, nodding just once before he was the first to step forward.
The guards opened the front door and the infinity of a hallway adorned in red and gold greeted them. One of the butlers appeared to meet them, leading them through familiar passages that now looked strange, staircases just as lonely as in their memories and doors that seemed to shriek in their muteness.
Familiar laughter echoed down the hallway, the great lion-carved door doing little to quiet the cheerful music of uninstrumented voices. Jay and Gil looked at each other, the oppression that had accompanied them all the way dissipating the moment that closeness with those they loved was finally a fact and not just a thought.
"Your Majesty, your guests have arrived," Lumiere announced and the doors were thrown open, leaving the two lost travelers in full view.
For a brief moment, time stood still in that image. Dust particles floating visible under the beams of sunlight streaming in through the windows, scraps of fabric everywhere, a table laden with various sweets adorned at the end, Dude standing on top of the back of the sofa and Carlos' neck, Uma holding a cup as a weapon against Ben, Mal lying on another couch with a cup in her hand and a muffin in her mouth, Dough trying to write something against the hand rest of an armchair, Jane protecting the jewelry laid out on the center table from Celia's hands, and Dizzy shouting different ideas for the ceremony towards Evie.
The solarium was the realm of disorder, whose existence was frozen in time just long enough for everyone to observe their long-awaited visitors standing in the doorway, holding suitcases that Evie could barely fit her sleepwear into, wearing worn out pants and tanned to a cartoonish point. It was then that the real ceremony of chaos began.
"Jay!"
"Gil!"
The euphoric screams echoed deafeningly, accompanied by the cacophony of objects abruptly dropped, as a sea of arms swept them into the room and enveloped them in tight hugs from different people. The laughter, naughty giggles, hundreds of threats and protests for not arriving sooner and more lipstick marks than Jay had ever had in his entire life were a refreshing caress to them both.
They hadn't realized how hungry for familiar contact they were until they felt that deep warmth again quenching the ache of their hunger. Jay willingly accepted Evie's red lipstick mark on his right cheek, Mal's swipe on his arm that left a palm print on his skin, and Carlos' tears that dampened the collar of his shirt. His family was there and he was home.
"For God's sake, tell us how was the trip back," Mal demanded, all of them walking to the available seats to create a circle around the main table, where the jewelry had been discreetly replaced by cold drinks and rolls.
"Hell," Gil complained, pressing himself tighter against Uma's torso, who had her arms wrapped around him from behind and squeezing him tightly. "A flight attendant was bugging us the whole trip just because she wanted Jay's number."
"It wasn't the whole trip either," Jay protested, getting an accusing look from Gil that made everyone guffaw and Jay blush. "Forget it. Rather, someone explain to me who came up with the idea of a wedding in this infernal heat."
Jay knew he had asked the wrong question when an anguished sound of protest filled the solarium in unison and his friends were wearing expressions of varying levels of distress.
"You brought this one on yourself, buddy," commented Dough, patting Jay's shoulder in a consoling gesture and handing him an ice-cold beer as compensation.
"Let me educate you on that, Jay," Evie declared with an almost furious smile and yes, Jay knew he had definitely asked the wrong question.
Their bags were taken by the palace staff to their guest rooms which were already perfectly arranged for them, the snacks on the table were replaced by pizzas and the beers continued to flow, but this was something Jay registered very distantly, for if his attention strayed even a little from Evie's lengthy explanation, she was quick to scold him fiercely. It was to be feared, if Jay was sincere.
Somewhere between the special seasonal flowers Evie wanted at her wedding and something about lights for photographs, Cassandra came to the palace to pick up Gil discreetly. Jay barely got to say goodbye to him before watching him disappear holding Cassandra's hand and turning his attention back to the explanation about the sunlight highlighting the blue of Evie's hair for greater effect of something, Jay wasn't sure what.
Thanking all the gods possible, near dusk Uma decided that she would not stand one more comment about the wedding and if Evie continued with her endless verbiage she would be married under the sea swimming with the fishes.
Evie seemed to understand that Uma wasn't entirely joking, because she changed the direction of the conversation to Gil and Jay's travels; the latter, delighted to share with his family, related some things important to him without giving too many details, claiming that he preferred to wait until he and Gil could tell everything together.
His friends seemed to understand the sentiment, because they accepted Jay's distraction by asking Ben about his recent coronation. The, now, King Ben gave a moderate explanation about all his royal duties, which consisted of more paperwork than he considered humanly necessary and how he couldn't wait to marry Mal the following year so she could use the royal seal and take care of some of the paperwork for him.
"In the end he's only interested in marriage so he can have someone to sign for him," Mal accused, lightly punching Ben in the abdomen, to which he responded with a chuckle before draping his arm over Mal's shoulders, his fingers reaching out to touch Uma.
"At least I don't have to take over the Isle with Uma as its governor," Ben commented, his gaze softening as he met hers. Mal looked at her as well, affection evident in her eyes.
"How's that working out for you, by the way?" Jay asked, not commenting on the obvious relationship they had. He had been away for over a year, he didn't know how much had happened in the love life of the three of them.
"Running an autonomous state as governor, when its inhabitants are villains in rehab, isn't exactly easy," Uma replied, relaxing against the back of the couch. "Sometimes there are problems and many have had a hard time getting fully rehabilitated, but it's not a lost cause."
"Okay, enough about politics," Evie interjected, standing up and clapping her hands to get everyone's attention. "Tomorrow there's a pre-shoot to keep a record of the whole process. I've been waiting for us all to be there to start it, so we'll be up early. I don't want any excuses, let's get to sleep! We need the beauty sleep for this."
"The photographer is booked from 8: 30 am, so don't be late," said Jane, ignoring along with Evie the protests of everyone, including the groom.
"You'd think the wedding would be more about, you know, getting married," commented Dough to Jay, causing him to let out an ill-contained chuckle as they walked out of the solarium.
"Marrying Evie? You can't be that naive," Jay replied, returning the comforting pat on the shoulder that Dough had given him earlier.
Saying their goodbyes in the various corridors leading to the designated rooms, the group dispersed until Jay hugged Carlos one last time to let him and Jane go to their room in the wing of the castle belonging to the Fairy Godmother and her family.
A somber feeling overcame Jay as he found himself alone, the gloom of the desolate corridors barely supported by yellowish lights adding to the inner discomfort. Taking a deep breath, Jay pushed past his own thoughts and walked into his room, being hit immediately by a sickeningly sweet storm of memories.
There was a bittersweet taste to the scenes his mind conjured up with fervent ease. Leaning against the cold wood of the door behind him, Jay felt his eyes fixed on the bed that had cradled their last night of worshipping Harry's body, when they thought they would be parted forever.
For the past year and a half he had complied with Harry's request to give him his space. Even when he could hear Gil talking to Harry on the phone inside the poorly lit room of a cheap motel, while Jay pretended to give him privacy by staying on the balcony the entirety of the call, Jay forced himself to ignore it.
He didn't ask about him, because Harry had asked him not to, and he never heard Gil explain himself about Jay, so it was obvious Harry wasn't asking questions either.
Still, he could hear congratulations on his progress in therapy here and there, when Gil would get so excited that he would forget to lower his voice so his traveling companion could continue to pretend not to hear anything. At one point in his travels Gil even bought a small cake with a number candle and celebrated Harry's months of full sobriety.
From the balcony that night, with a cigar in one hand and a bottle of beer in the other, Jay toasted Harry's sobriety, enjoying the irony of his gesture.
Jay had sometimes spoken to Uma, when he called to talk to Mal and Ben and she was there. In fact, Jay couldn't remember a call toward the couple in the last eight months where Uma hadn't also been there. That was the answer to his doubts that afternoon, Jay surmised.
Despite having struck up a relative friendship with Uma, and even spoken to her alone a couple of times, Jay didn't ask. He wanted to and he was sure the myriad of questions were plastered on his face, if Uma's compassionate look was anything to go by, but he kept his word and Uma let him. If both she and he were proud of his resilience, well, that was just a bonus.
Even that day, back home and surrounded by all his friends, Jay didn't touch the elephant in the room. Harry hadn't been there and no one seemed to miss him, and Jay didn't want to ruin the mood by bringing up his ramshackle love life. But there, in the dim light of his room, in the dead of night, surrounded by so many memories his mind could no longer contain, Jay's control finally broke.
His trembling hands hurriedly opened the door, as if he feared it would close forever if he took a second longer, and the hallway greeted him with the same silent gloom he had left behind minutes before.
His eyes looked around, his breathing quickening to an almost erratic point as his mind tried to come up with a plan of action. He didn't know where to look for Uma. Would she be in the royal room with Ben and Mal? Or perhaps she had her own? Had she returned to the Isle? Jay was struggling to find answers when the questions were wiped from his mind with a single gesture.
In front of him, at the end of the hallway, stood Uma.
No words were needed.
'I was wondering how much longer it would take you,' her gaze said.
'Sorry for taking so long,' his pleaded.
Uma turned and began a slow walk down the desolate hallway. Jay followed her silently. The litany of his footsteps seemed a rhythmic harmony toward his decapitation, but Jay did not pause, following her down the stairs, past the large back doors, into the depths of the royal garden.
A fountain gently reflected the moonlight, the water flowing endlessly and the great statue of Beauty and Beast in the center crowding the structure. That's where Uma stopped. There Jay stopped.
"I admit it, you controlled yourself more than I gave you credit for," Uma whispered, in the quiet night her words reaching Jay with the clarity of screams.
"It was torture every second."
"I know," Uma replied, sighing with surrender before confronting Jay face to face. "Go ahead, ask."
He could speak, drop the deluge of questions that had gotten stuck at the back of his throat and slowly choked him, but he chose to ask the only question that truly mattered to him.
"How is he?"
Uma was silent, weighing the answer as her eyes scrutinized Jay. There was a vulnerability in him that Uma knew Jay would never have allowed himself to show years before. And maybe it was that, or that she was truly happy for once in her life, but Uma found herself delivering an honest answer.
"It was difficult for him at first. He didn't know how to get along with anyone on Auradon, there was a lot to sort out from the Isle and he'd always had rather toxic coping mechanisms," Uma let out a ragged breath, all the tension in her shoulders evaporating. "But his family was there, and the Isle, and me. All broken, frayed toys trying to put themselves together. So he started going to an alcohol support group with his father and therapy, took a placement test, got his high school diploma, and decided to take a few courses instead of going to college."
"Kept himself busy," Jay commented with a smile, a strange sense of peace melting the cold inside him that he longed for a fragment of warmth.
Uma smiled, nodding once and turning toward the fountain. Jay took two more steps, stopping beside her, the distance between them almost nil and their closeness bringing with it a comforting calm.
"There were bad days, even worse nights, but he found his way out," Uma continued, her voice trailing off in an almost muted whisper, as if her words were a precious confession that could fracture. Jay treated it as such.
"I want to see him, Uma," Jay murmured, his crystallized gaze focused on the fountain splashing his pants. "Where is he?"
For a few seconds the night clothed that moment in lulling silence, breaking in harmony with the steady flow of the fountain's water.
Later, another day, if Jay had to tell anyone how he felt when Uma answered his question, he would only say that a hole opened deep in his chest and swallowed him whole. The good and the bad disappeared at once, leaving nothing. But that would be later, because at that instant the sensation was happening and the darkness spilling over the edges of his soul was poison of his own making.
"He's gone, Jay."
"What do you mean, he's gone?" Jay asked, not fully aware of how long it took him to get the question out.
"A few months ago he came to see me. He said he couldn't stand the litany of this life anymore, fixing others when he could barely fix himself," A grim expression darkened Uma's face. "He asked my permission to leave, as if I could stop him; I suppose he was afraid of losing me if he left me alone with the Isle. He gave back his untouched reward money to the crown in exchange for a favor from the Fairy Godmother: that she would use her magic to fix and modify the Jolly Roger, so that he could travel the waters of the present world. He set sail a day later, with a small crew of five, and hasn't returned since."
Jay felt his knees fail to support him, propelling his body just enough to drop him onto the wet wall of the fountain. His hands covered his face and his mind cut off from the world, Uma's words echoing like a chant in the emptiness of his mind.
The echo repeated infinitely and Jay wanted to scream, to cry, to break something; but also to laugh, because his pain could not mask his happiness.
Harry was fine, strong, moving forward on his own without being under anyone's care and protection. Harry, who looked to Uma for permission before speaking, who obeyed blindly and hated being in charge of others, now sailed the seas being his own captain. He had taken control of his life and, though the road was still long, Jay felt a burst of pride flooding inside him and swallowing everything else.
"Do you talk to him?" He finally asked, his raspy voice evidence that he had been crying beyond his conscious ability to register it.
"Sometimes," Uma replied, politely choosing not to point out anything about Jay's collapse. "He calls from time to time, if he spends a few days in some port of his liking before he leaves again, but most of the time he's at sea, so he doesn't get reception."
"Can you... Can you...?" Jay stumbled over his own words, a pitiful smile tugging at his lips. "When he calls you again, give him my number, please. No strings, no rush, just... tell him he can call me anytime, if he wants to."
A quiet nod was all the answer Uma gave, but for Jay it was more than enough. He couldn't be the one to contact Harry, he had to wait and trust. Trust his love or Harry? Maybe himself? Jay wasn't sure of the answer, he just knew he would wait anyway. For the time being, he would enjoy his life and embrace what he had by his side, the family they had all created together.
That night, Jay returned to sleep in the bed he had shared with Harry during their last night together, feeling like the emptiness beside him was an icy desert capable of consuming him. The feeling lingered for the next few nights, because the pain of not having him was more real now that he was home, but Jay ignored it. He breathed through his torment and continued to smile and enjoy the company around him.
He wasn't faking it, not exactly, but he admitted that he put more than genuine enthusiasm into every thing he did to compensate for the internal burning. It wasn't until Carlos sat him down one day and forced him to face his mental hell that Jay broke down. He cried, feeling stupid because of the emotional ambivalence inside him. Carlos hugged him, reassuring him that what he felt was perfectly valid, and held Jay's hand in the waiting room of the consultation with his therapist. It was time to resume his therapy.
Things got better after that step. There were gray days and dark nights, but the smiles in Evie's wedding photos were absolutely genuine, conversations with his father were no longer charged with a cutting edge that threatened to bleed them dry, his house didn't feel empty because he lived there alone, and his life had taken on a new purpose when Jay decided to use what was left of his reward.
There was a lot of paperwork involved and Jay wanted to strangle the notary on several occasions, but it was all worth it when the Rehabilitation Center for Evil Behavior opened. They built it on the Isle, in Dr. Facilier's old lair thanks to Celia's help in convincing her father to sell the place. The facility was divided by age and levels of evil, seeking to rehabilitate and safely reintegrate into society not only villains and their children, but also anyone capable of evil in Auradon.
His father was among the first to join the program for adults and veteran villains, even accepting the consultations with the psychiatrist and the treatment he was put through. His relationship with his son remained strained, but Jay was proud of his father for committing him and that smoothed out several rough edges.
To Jay's surprise, among the staff at the emotional support and behavioral rehabilitation center was a very familiar face: Harriet Hook. Although Jay had always been closer to CJ than to the older Hook sibling, working with Harriet proved to be easy and relaxing. She didn't ask Jay if he knew anything about Harry, he didn't ask if she talked to him, and their days continued quietly.
It was on a visit by Mal to the Underworld to meet his father's wife, Persephone, that Jay found himself at the front of the Isle, as Uma and Ben were dragged by Mal with her on the grounds that she would not bear the headache of understanding that his father had returned to his ex-wife, they had remarried, and she was pregnant.
Jay felt during that month that he would end up melting from internal combustion in some meeting about more ways to improve the Isle and a health care system that would address the major ailments the Islanders had due to their years of malnutrition and misery.
Carlos, being the great savior that he was, kidnapped Jay from an extremely long meeting with the help of CJ, who pretended to pass out at the door of the place and attracted the attention of the group of old men with sticks up their asses and wax plugs in their ears. That night they all gathered on the beach, drinking beers and singing around a campfire. It was the first night Jay slept without dreaming of Harry, the side of his bed as warm as if there were a person there, the emptiness less noticeable.
Mal and Ben were married early the following year, Jay as Ben's best man and Evie as Mal's maid of honor. Ben's father was the one who made the ceremony and the marriage official, dedicating words of love that made Bella let out a few tears and Hades roll his eyes, which seemed to amuse Persephone and draw a giggle-like gurgle from the little baby god she carried.
If Mal and Ben went on their honeymoon with Uma and Jay had to go back to taking over the running of the Isle, well, now he knew that Carlos would kidnap him to rescue him when he pushed himself too far.
His life was not entirely monotonous, but the lack of excitement was something Jay was infinitely grateful for. The comfort that safety brought was welcome to him and those around him.
"So, how is Carlos?" Asked Lonnie from the other end of the phone, the sound of something falling interrupting Jay's answer for a few seconds as she spat out insults. "Well?"
"Seeing Cruella in the psych ward hasn't been easy, as you can imagine," Jay replied with a sigh, resting his free arm on his bent knee. "Luckily, Jane knows how to support him from sympathetic silence."
"That explains the ring you two have been looking for all week for Carlos to propose to Jane, they're a perfect match."
"Yeah, but if I have to parade around one more jewelry store, I swear I'll end up proposing to Jane myself," Jay mumbled in a deadpan complaint, laughing with Lonnie at his dramatics.
"Okay, I'll hang up then, but remember I'm going to Auradon this weekend and I have every intention of sleeping in as soon as I get there, so clean your house."
"I'll make time for that."
"I mean it, Jay! I'll mop the floor with your long hair if I come in and find my room dirty!"
"All right, all right! I get it!" Jay replied, fighting back a laugh. "See you soon, Lonnie."
"Get some rest Jay, you haven't slept at all and it's almost dawn over there," said Lonnie with a soft sigh, not waiting for an answer, and hung up.
The cell phone fell from his hands to the padded surface of the cushion beside him, leaving Jay with only his thoughts to occupy him. The sky lightened in waves from the deepest blue to a faint cerulean, no hint of the sun's gold yet.
His sleepless nights were not as frequent today as they once were, but years of a nocturnal life had proven difficult to erase from his habits. On nights like that, with the moon hidden and only the stars for company to welcome the sun, Jay preferred to stay awake and enjoy the more advantageous sides of his insomnia. He couldn't quite correct it, so he chose to revel in the beauty of opportunity.
The sound of his cell phone receiving a call interrupted the passivity that enveloped Jay, but a smile graced his lips as he picked it up from the cushion without even looking. It wouldn't be the first time Lonnie would call to make sure he was following her orders to take care of himself.
"I'm too old for you to be monitoring my night's sleep," he commented as soon as he answered, his eyes still fixed on the brightening horizon.
"I was counting on you to stay awake, actually."
The landscape in front of Jay froze, time stopping at that very second and jamming oxygen into Jay's lungs.
A second? A lifetime?
Jay wasn't sure, but he felt the exact moment his heart started beating again, the engine of his life starting a mad dash to the finish line. The clock ticked forward again, the sky lightened two shades more, and Jay's mind went mute.
'Finally.'
"Harry," The name fell from his lips like a sacred prayer, fiery hope and longing suffusing his voice.
"Hello, Jay," Harry greeted and Jay let out a choked sigh, almost able to feel the smile on the pirate's lips. "Uma gave me your message."
For months after his return, Jay had watched his cell phone obsessively, pining for the moment when it would ring and it would be Harry on the other end of the line, planning every single thing he would say to him and what he would promise. Now, as his wish came true, Jay's mind went blank and his thoughts seemed to have gone dead.
"Are you still there, or did spending so much time inside the lamp finally melt your brain?"
The remaining laughter burst lightly from his chest, shaking Jay's walls from the inside out, rearranging everything.
"How are you?" asked Jay, coming out of the silence imposed by his stunned reaction.
"Red as a lobster," Harry sputtered, a frustrated snort echoing against Jay's ear through the cell phone. "Who knew I couldn't tan properly? I seem to wear a constant blush on my face, it's disgusting."
"I'm sure you look excellent, your blushing face is a sight to behold."
"No matter how much coquetry you put into your words, I'm not going to think any better of my looks," Harry replied solicitously. "I'm gorgeous and I know it, but this orange blush just isn't my thing."
"Are you wearing sunscreen?"
"Sometimes, almost always, but you know how I am. My mind has a lot of things to take care of before I think about that."
"Well set an alarm or something, it's risky for your skin to burn constantly," Harry guffawed at Jay's fatherly scolding and Jay himself felt embarrassment cover his face in the form of heat.
"You've matured, Jay," Harry commented, the laughter dying in his mouth and leaving behind a melancholy drag.
"We're not sixteen anymore," he replied in a whisper, sighing at the clarity of the life they now led. "How are you?"
The question settled heavy between them, more real this second time. There were so many possible answers that Jay hugged himself inwardly, preparing for the final blow. His fear was never consummated, Harry's voice becoming a longed-for balm to his torment.
"Happy," Harry let a few seconds pass after his confession, allowing Jay some much-needed time to digest that answer. "I felt caged, surrounded by nothing and oblivious to so much. I needed to breathe and, now, I do. I am calm."
"You always belonged to the sea."
"Yes, I suppose I did," Harry agreed with a chuckle. "I'm not saying I don't need the warmth of the land too, but, this: the Jolly Roger, open sea and trips from port to port, that's what I need now."
Jay believed him, could feel the reassurance of his happiness welling up in every word that fell from his mouth. This Harry was someone beyond his reach, one who was unknown to him and probably to everyone, the Harry who was being created based on his own desires and expectations, not molded by life around him and the influence of others. And Jay felt a burst of pride suffocating him in the most pleasurable way possible.
"How are you doing?"
"At peace," Jay admitted, almost surprising himself by the serenity with which he managed to speak, facing his own truth.
The silence stretched for a few seconds, their breaths being the only thing they could hear from each other, bringing comfort in an unexpected way.
"Jay, I..." Harry cleared his throat, in that smooth, barely-there way he did when he was nervous. "Why did you ask me to call you?"
"Because I needed to hear from you," Jay answered immediately, not a trace of embarrassment in the sincerity of his words. "Why did you call me?"
"Because I needed to hear your voice," Harry confessed in a hoarse whisper that forced Jay's eyes to close, the pleasure of that admission coursing through his soul.
"Will you come back?" Jay asked, mentally counting the beats of his heart that echoed in his ears, choking out all sounds but Harry's breathing.
"I don't know," Harry muttered, a chuckle escaping his lips. "We all come home, someday, and that's what Auradon, the Isle, Uma and the pirates are. It's what you are."
A lone tear descended down Jay's cheek, rushing into the void and dying on the velvety surface of the cushion.
"I'll be here, Harry," Jay promised. "As long as it takes, no eternal oaths or ring, just me. I'll be here."
"I can't ask that of you."
"You don't," Jay countered firmly, his vision focused on the image of Harry his mind conjured behind the darkness of his closed eyelids. "Live your life and I'll live mine. But always remember that I will be here."
A hoarse, tearful breath came to Jay, and he let his own also travel to wherever in the world Harry was. They were written history and blank paper all at once. Books of a saga that was not yet finished. They had had several endings in different parts, but never the final end.
Their story was still unfinished and Jay; oh, Jay; he was going to hold on to that with his very life.
"Goodbye, Jay."
"See you, Harry."