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Damian was sitting on his bed, a book in hand but his mind wasn't there. There were many things Damian missed after all that he had lived, after almost losing his father and after everything, he even wondered if one day their relationship would be better, no, at least good. There was some level of comfort and trust in them but at the same, there were moments when his brother always took the best of Bruce Wayne -or even Batman- and he was left with nothing but the leftovers... yet, they were there, being Batman and Robin, going through Gotham's rooftops together, investigating and punching some bad guys. Something was missing in their relationship. He had seen the trust he had in Dick Grayson, the first Robin and Damian's friend and something else, but Damian was too shy to admit what Grayson meant to him -his big brother, his favourite partner and someone who wholeheartedly trusted him.
He placed the book beside him, sighing, there was no need to keep pretending, it was hard to pretend that he was interested in what was written in there, not that moment at least, since it was a book he liked and he wouldn't mind giving it another read. He looked at the ceiling, looking at a small weird pattern on the paint, he was looking for another distraction before his mind took him to the spiral that would make him end in despair and he would hate himself even more, he would feel even more unworthy of the place he was in. At the end of the day he had to do something and delaying everything wouldn't help him at all. He moved to reach for his phone and tossed it under his bed in a failed attempt to pay no attention to it. To ignore it as his siblings -yes, after everything they went through he thought of them as such even when he wouldn't acknowledge it to them, or at least not all of them.- He looked at the screen, all the messages exchanged were about his father and the day to come. Bruce hadn't been the best dad but he had done his best for him and everyone in the family. He hadn't been the best son and the fact that he was ignoring his brothers that very moment probed it. He was driven by guilt and at the same time jealousy. Everyone else seemed to know his father better than him or know sides of him that Damian hadn't encountered before.
Dick was excitedly writing down ideas while, Tim put every one of them, being as Damian vehemently would call him -in his face, but that very moment only did in his mind-, 'smartass', Cass was sending emojis, almost too excitedly but it seemed common in her to do so. Jason made some bitter remarks here and there that were supposed to be funny, and maybe those were funny but only to himself. Damian at that point didn't know what to do. A joint effort would be the best course of action but at the same time he felt like he should do something bigger and even better than everyone else. Fueling the guilt inside him.
Despite the fact Damian had lived with Bruce for a long time, their relationship wasn't the best. He had been a stubborn kid and he had been under Alfred's wing and help. He had done the most in all those years and Damian had been just himself, somewhat annoying and proud of himself. Not so much anymore.
They weren't the type to celebrate many 'Special' days but this time they gave themselves some time to do it. They hoped for the best, they hoped the day in question could be a safe one, at least, until night light. Hoping the Batman sign stays out and they don't have too much job to do. Damian looked at the hour on his phone, it was time for him to get changed and go to patrol. There weren't big cases to work on and he questioned, for the very first time as he began his Robin life, if it was necessary for him to leave. Many people could do the job for him. He just felt tired but in the end, maybe patrol would help him to think about other things besides the fact he wanted to give his father the best Father's Day gift that could make everyone else ashamed. He had done something really big before, something that even though he had heard an earful from Bruce about spending money was thankful for the memories he had been given back. This time, there wasn't as much money as it was before, either from his father as much as from his mother.
All his siblings had done things that had made their father proud, and in some way, he knew he was proud of all of them despite their flaws and failings from the past.
He was already dressed and when he went to the basement, it was empty, with no sign of his father or even the batmobile. He went to the computer to see if there was some clue on where his father could be, as he clicked around through secret and locked files he sat on the chair as a thought went through his head. He looked through his old case files. His notebook was filled with notes and some sketches. An idea solid as wood was there, craved in his mind and for a moment and a second he felt proud of himself but in a way, he hadn't felt before, he feared everything was a bad idea but everything would need to wait for the next morning to come. He left everything and went to patrol with a newfound incentive.
It was 5 AM and he was already done for the day, it was almost time for him to go back to the apartment but he stopped in his tracks and rerouted himself to go to Blüdhaven. His idea was so carved into his mind it was impossible to not feel excited, enough to make him feel a bit giddy and shaky.
He arrived at Dick's house not long after, he was never the type to talk over comms and that time was no different. He silently went into the apartment and was about to open his mouth.
"Don't forget I keep track of all of you," Barbara said, not looking away from the computer as she typed something. "Do you need something?"
Damian frowned slightly, "I wanted to talk to Grayson," he said as he walked towards Barbara, she turned to look at him, over her glasses.
"Not here, you can ask before coming," she said and looked back into the computer, starting to talk, giving some intel and Damian was not interested in it. He moved around the apartment, not caring about how Barbara was looking at him from the corner of her eyes. He rummaged through some papers and the girl was about to complain when Damian returned, he was holding a stack of empty papers and a pen in his hands. They looked at each other for a moment and Damian knew he didn't need to be there and he felt embarrassed.
"I want to make a portrait of everyone," Damian said softly and Barbara couldn't help but raise an eyebrow as he looked at the boy, looking at small red spots on his cheeks. There was something in here that wanted to make a joke but she refrained.
"Do you need me to pose or something?" She asked and Damian shook his head.
"No," he answered as he put himself to work. The paper resting on one side of Barbara's desk, a small empty spot, Damian tried his best to be comfortable to work there and from time to time he looked at Barbara, she was no longer paying attention to him. He made a few sketches of her, from different angles. They were silent, broken by Barbara's small comments and instructions, directed to someone but Damian was too focused to pay attention. They stretched almost at the same time, making Barbara chuckle at it.
"Can I see?" She asked softly and Damian nodded. "It's almost time for Dick to arrive," she said as she handed back the pieces of paper back to Damian. He nodded as he looked at the papers, the gears in his head working to grasp the idea.
"Hey, Babs," Dick broke the silence as he entered the room. He didn't try to hide his surprise when he saw Damian, sitting on a chair beside Barbara's desk. "I didn't know you'd be here," he said softly as he walked close to them.
"Me neither," Damian said and smirked at his brother. "I want to make a portrait for my father," he said as he piled up the sketches and put some blank pages over them. "It's long overdue an update," he said with a smile and Dick smiled back at him. Damian stood, not wasting a moment and not letting Dick get close to Barbara, making her giggle at the confusion drawn into Dick's face. Damian pulled him into the living room and made him sit on the couch as he started to sketch him. The youngest Wayne was unaware at the moment of the smile drawn on Dick's lips, it wasn't until he saw the sketches back in his room and felt a wave of embarrassment but it passed as fast as it came. Dick Grayson was proud of his younger brother.
Damian wasn't the kind to ask for privacy but as he sketched on the canvas, drawings of Dick, Barbara, Steph and Tim on his wall, alongside some of Alfred's photographs, he required and demanded some privacy as he worked, his door locked when he was in or out of the room. He knew his father was paranoid at some degree but he wanted the surprise to not be spoiled at the moment. His fingers and the side of his hand were black with charcoal as he drew, everything stained in the canvas, something that was part of the process. The centre of the canvas was empty, and clean of any type of stain, an almost perfect circle. A soft knock on his door made Damian jump and blush.
"It's almost time to go," he hard at the other side of the door, he tried to hear some steps going away from his door but he knew it was part of him to be silent at almost every movement but he still froze for a few seconds before moving to the basement and change into his uniform. They went together for most of the night but a small buzz in his communicator made him excuse himself.
"Jason says he will be home," Barbara said, her words directed only at him. After the night he went to Nightwings and Oracle's shared home, she made herself the job to call him whenever anyone was free for him to go and do some sketches of them. He didn't take photographs of them because he wanted to be used to their faces, to the way the shadows moved on them and with a photograph it felt a bit distant and it was something that he wanted to be close to him and close to his father. If it was for him, it would be only his father and him, he could stop the whole hassle but they were a family and his father wanted it to be a family.
"I need to go," Damian said and Bruce looked at him, he could sense the confusion in his father. "I'll be home as always," he finished as he jumped away, leaving Batman alone, on a rooftop in Gotham.
Jason's apartment was small and a bit tattered but it was a place Jason called home and Damian had no reason to say otherwise, he had been there. Living in a small empty place, working on his father's black book. When he arrived Jason was expecting him, a smug smile on his face that made Damian hate his idea. Maybe a photograph would be enough.
"So..." Jason trailed almost mockingly.
"Shut up Jason," Damian hissed as he looked at him briefly before he started to draw in the sketchbook.
"I think you're doing great," Jason said and Damian couldn't help but sigh. He didn't hate Jason but sometimes he behaved in a way that made him feel annoying and anyone could say the same about him. "Bruce is gonna love it," Jason finished and when Damian looked at him, he could see a small glimpse of sadness. All of them have been hurt in one way or another and things haven't been the best for either of them.
"And this time you will be part of it," Damian said softly. "I know it might be hard to sit out of the last one." Jason smiled and moved slightly to ruffle Damian's hair. He knew he hated it but at that moment he didn't care, he was happy to hear him say that. They weren't as different as they tried to appear. He sat again and left Damian to work in silence. He was correct, he liked the idea of being part of the family portrait.
When Damian finished, Jason stood beside him. "I hope this time you don't electrocute me," he said in a low voice and moved to hug Damian, it took a few seconds for Damian to hug him back.
He went back into the apartment and his room, hanging Jason's sketches on the wall before he fell on his bed to rest, he went to sleep, feeling a little accomplished.
Damian and Cassandra Cain didn't have much of a relationship, they came as good training partners to the other and challenging each other was a fun way to joke around. Both of them were good at fighting; it felt natural for them to do so. The moment he stepped into Cassandra's place he felt awkward to be there, there was no reason for them to share something else but fun bickering and banter. They sat at the table, Cassandra looked at Damian the whole time, silently and blanking, making the younger one blush at the intense stare, Cassandra smiled, something that didn't go unperceived by Damian and he sketched the small line her lips made.
"Do you think Bruce would like it?" She asked as she rested her elbow on the table and her chin on the back of her hands. Damian stopped the movement for a fraction of a second.
"I hope so," He answered, "if you wonder if he'll like you being in the portrait, the answer is yes, he most definitely would." He said, almost in a whisper but Cassandra could hear it clearly, she moved her hand to reach Damian.
"I know he'll love whatever you do," she said smiling and her hand retreated. Damian blushed, what else could he do? There was too much he didn't know but sharing those moments with his siblings made them know them a little better and feel comfortable around them. Perhaps it was what he needed to trust them a little better and become closer in the near future. He closed the sketchbook and looked at Cassandra who looked at the book in his hands.
"Do you want to see them?" he asked but she shook her head.
"I also want to be surprised," she said with a big grin. "Make me look prettier."
Damian chuckled, "I cannot do miracles," he said and Cassandra scoffed and pushed him to the door.
Damian walked into the living room, his father was in the kitchen, making himself some coffee as he worked in a case. The holographic map of Gotham filled the table as Damian walked closer. He tried to hide the painting behind him but the size was larger than him to properly conceal it behind him. A small dust of pink was spread on his cheeks and doubts, small were growing and it formed a knot on his stomach. Was this a good idea? He didn't mind the work he had put into painting each of the family members but, will his father like it, be proud of him?
"Father," he said, hearing his voice crack and he hated himself for it. It might be normal for his age but at that moment, it hurt his pride. Bruce looked at him over his cup of coffee and couldn't help but draw a small smile on his lips as he stared back at his son and the big frame.
"Yes, Damian," he said solemnly, looking at his son, acting like hadn't noticed what he had in his hands.
Damian cleared his throat, "You haven't been the best father," he began, making Bruce frown, taking a sip from his cup, "But you have risen to the occasion, and you have been adequate to the job. You have been a competent father figure these last years and I'm happy to be with you." He finished, he hadn't been looking at his father, a bit embarrassed about everything. "Happy Father's Day," Damian said as he carefully and almost uncomfortably handed the painting towards his father. Bruce stared at the work in front of him, his face illuminated by pride and happiness.
Bruce had always known about Damian's talent for art, he was good and he wanted him to keep working on that besides doing his job as a masked vigilante and that moment when he held the painting, made by his son, framed with a renaissance golden frame he was most happy of him doing something else and something he liked.
The painting had everyone's faces in it, starting with Bruce's in the middle, full front and everyone else was at the side, faces slightly turned as it reached the edge of the painting with the profiles of Cassandra and Damian. The background was dark but not black, no it was blueish and grey with a slight Rembrandt lightning on everyone and it was surprising for Bruce such use of light and shadows, demonstrating what Damian was capable of and he was even more capable of what Batman had anticipated.
"Thank you," Bruce said after a few moments and he couldn't help but to keep admiring the piece of art in his hands. At the rim of the frame there was a plaque and in it was engraved with cursive letters 'Wayne Family', he caressed the plaque. "It's beautiful," he said as he stood from his stool in the kitchen and walked to the living room, looking for a place to hang it. Damian looked at him with a proud smile and he retreated to his room until everyone else came home, celebrating, yelling and making some noise that would gladly be accepted, only that day.