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Silence.
It’s all he hears as he stalks to the hall closet to get a pillow for the couch.
Where just moments before there was anything but… Instead the house was filled with raised and heated voices going back and forth until both were tired and hoarse and just over it. Evan storms into their room slamming the door shut behind him and Tommy had decided as soon as the first angry statement was made; if he wants to go to bed angry, so be it.
So Tommy stands outside the room for a moment and stares at the door, giving Evan a chance to come out. He knows he won’t. He knows Evan internalizes everything and they have been working on this but they aren’t past it yet. Still, he doesn’t go in, he doesn’t try to fix it himself. He just stalks to the hall closet and grabs a pillow for the couch.
Silence.
It’s all he hears as he lifts his stiff body off the not nearly comfortable enough cushions.
Tommy sits up and stretches, his bones creak and pop. He goes first to their room, knocks… No answer. Once more, then he pushes the door open to find the bed made. Evan is already gone.
He’s not entirely surprised, and he’s even less surprised that his clothes are laid out for him on the bed, and there’s a note on the counter by the premade coffee pot that a plate of bacon and eggs is in the fridge for him. Tommy sighs, gets the plate out and sticks it in a bag to eat later at work. He supposes this is Evan’s way of making amends.
Silence.
It’s all he hears on the car ride across town towards Harbor station.
He doesn’t feel like listening to the radio, so he cracks his window and stares blankly ahead at the road. He wonders how long they won’t speak if he doesn’t reach out first. He picks up his phone and moves his eyes from the road to the screen as he scrolls to Evan’s number. He could potentially end this whole thing by just pressing it.
He is suddenly being jolted hard towards his door, his shoulder hitting the window with enough force to break it; glass slices into his skin. His truck is pushed through the intersection by a semi. He didn’t even hear them blaring their horn… because they hadn’t. Then never even had the time to do so when he cruised through the red light; distracted by something he should have taken care of last night.
Silence.
It’s all he hears once unconsciousness takes him under and he is left floating amidst the pain his body is in.
With the lack of visuals the silence seems much, much louder. Seems eerie. He isn’t sure how long he is there; emerged in the absolute nothingness of it all. Then slowly, as if the sound is being turned up by a volume knob he hears the static buzz he has memorized as that of a defibrillator.
He feels the jolt. He sees a flash of light.
“Evan Buckley…” he hears the introduction, clear as a bell. Then he sees him, smiling around the worry he’s internalizing for Bobby and Athena’s fates as he extends a hand towards Tommy.
“I just wanted to get to know you…” he hears next. Sees Evan standing in his loft, eyes shining at him as they both begin to realize what had been going on this whole time.
“I think that something… could be with you…”
“Be safe…”
Tommy doesn’t move, doesn’t breathe — doesn’t think he could if he wanted to — as he watches his memories play out. Oh god, I must be dying, he thinks. He listens to Evan’s voice; clings to it. “Be safe,” “I love you,” “Marry me.” He feels the cool metal of the wedding band he wears on a chain while at work laying against his chest; his hands swell sometimes during intense shifts and he doesn’t want to take it off and lose it.
Silence.
It’s all he hears after the last words Evan said — “I don’t feel like fighting about this right now.” — play out.
He feels cold. He thinks he might be dead. He can only imagine the guilt wracking Evan right now; it’s probably equivalent to the guilt wracking Tommy…
“I’m sorry,” he hears, though all he sees is nothing. “I- I’m so sorry,” Evan cries, and Tommy can feel a hand is his, gripping it for dear life. “Tommy please, you have to come back to me. I will never go to bed angry again, just please come back to me.”
There is everything but silence in the room.
Machine beeping, and whirring, the tv playing, people talking in the hall, Evan softly sobbing beside him. “It’s so loud,” Tommy winces, cracking his eyes open, before shutting back immediately from the intense bright light above him.
Evan shoots up like a rocket. His hands can’t seem to decide where to go; Tommy’s face, his chest, the call button which he presses repeatedly. “Oh my god you’re awake! I can’t— I thought— Oh my god, Tommy…”
“Baby, it’s ok, come here,” Tommy says, reaching out as best as he can towards Evan. “I love you, it’s ok.”
He is checked out by doctor after doctor and nurse after nurse — not to mention visitor after visitor — before he and Evan are finally left alone again. Through some persistence he finally convinces Evan the bed is, in fact, big enough for the both of them. (It’s really not, he doesn’t care.)
“Baby…” Tommy says once Evan finally settles against his side, he feels him shift and look up. “My breakfast… I never got to eat it,” his face hurts from the cuts and stitches in it but he manages a pout regardless.
He hears Evan chuckle; thinks it’s one of the most amazing sounds to ever exist, along with every other sound Evan makes. “As soon as I get you home, I’ll make you the biggest breakfast ever, all your favorites.”
Tommy smiles, moves just enough to press a kiss into the side of Evan’s head. “I like the sound of that.