Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Ellie walked for hours, not knowing where to go. She can’t go back to Jackson, not after everything with Tommy and Dina; they deserve better.
She was hurt, but had no energy to fix up the arrow wound in her shoulder- it was probably infected by now. Her body ached and her feet stung with blisters, but she had nowhere to go and few supplies. She couldn’t stay at the farm; it hurt too much being there. She planned to just carry on walking until her body finally gave in; there was no point living in this fucked up world anymore.

•

Ellie was tired; she didn’t know where she was. She had been on the move for days, with little to eat or drink. She finally decided to find a place to wait it out, and settled on a seemingly empty arcade. It was ironic really, and her mind filled with memories from that night, her and Riley… her life was just one loss after another, everyone she had ever gotten close to had died- it was her turn now. Stop it, she thought, wishing for the last few hours of her life to not be filled with regret, and reflection on how much hurt she had caused. She sat down on an old sofa in a backroom and allowed her exhaustion to take over.

•

Someone, or something was pounding on the door when she awoke a while later. Ellie was fed up of running, but she didn’t want to die
a coward, so she grabbed her knife and attempted escape. She exited out a back door and was convinced it would be easy to get away. It was stupid, that was rarely the case; she was being chased within a few seconds due to her forgetting basic survival skills even after living in a literal apocalypse. Her foot got caught and knocked over a stupid fucking garbage can which quickly alerted several people of her presence. Might as well escape death once more, she thought.

The only problem, these people had horses, she definitely didn’t. Ellie sprinted through alleys, to avoid them gaining on her, until she reached woodland and was convinced she’d lost them. She looked around and noticed a small cabin hidden in well overgrown bushes- that’ll do I guess.
Her injury had gotten worse and was definitely infected now, she could tell she had a fever and chills ran through her body. Ellie had been through worse but despite that, it didn’t make her feel any better; her shoulder hurt like a motherfucker. In this moment, she really wished Joel was with her; he’d have fixed it, made sure she was okay… god she wished he was here.
She slid down the wall to the ground; her legs couldn’t hold her weight anymore, this was the end- it had to be. In her haze she failed to hear the hoofbeats outside the cabin.

•

“GET UP, HANDS IN THE AIR!”
Ellie startled, and considered whether or not she should bother.. or if she should just let them shoot her; she was dying anyway.
She felt the voice inside her telling her to listen, she would leave when she wanted to- after all, she took an ounce of pride in the fact that she was a survivor, despite the loss that had come with it.
“Ok,ok, I’m getting up” she replied, weakly.
She stood slowly, staggering to her feet. Her vision went blurry, head aching and fuzzy. She held up her hands, displaying her two small stumps that were once fingers- before everything happened on the beach.
“TURN AROUND,SLOWLY!”
Suddenly she realised she recognised the voice… oh god no, surely not; she can’t have gotten that close to Jackson. She could’ve sworn she was heading east. This was the one thing wanted to avoid.
“Look, you don’t have to do this ok? Just leave and I won’t follow, I’ll stay here until dusk. Please don’t do this.”
“TURN AROUND, THIS IS YOUR LAST WARNING; I’LL SHOOT!”
Maybe she was right- or maybe a side effect of dying was just imagining things, she knew it was a risk, and she really didn’t want to take it.
She turned cautiously, slowly. Head down and ready to run, despite the fact that she felt like she was about to fall over.
She took the risk- the odds really were not in her favour.
Shit.

•

“Oh my god, Ellie?” Maria lowered the gun.
Ellie made eye contact, felt the sting of tears in her eyes; and did the one thing she was good at. Ellie ran.
She couldn’t face the guilt, she’d caused so much pain to everyone, especially Tommy and Maria. She let Tommy down, didn’t go through with it. She let Tommy get hurt, after promising to Maria that she would bring him back safe. She’d was the reason Tommy had no living blood-relatives left. She’s ruined their lives purely by existing. She won’t let herself ruin anything more.

•

She darted past Maria and out the entrance of the cabin, praying that there wouldn’t be any others.
She was wrong.
Upon reaching the street, she came face to face with what seemed like half of Jackson.
Why was she this unlucky all the damn time?
Whispers of her name carried throughout the small crowd of people. Some atop horses and some on foot; she was trapped between them and the cabin she had left Maria inside, not that she’d remain in there long.
Suddenly, she noticed yet another familiar figure walking through the crowd towards her; recognising his obvious limp before even seeing his face. She couldn’t let him know she’d failed.
Ellie panicked, she had to get out of there before he saw her.
She pushed through the crowd, half-shoving people to the side. Finally coming to the end of the mass gathering.
She was out; finally.

‘Ellie?’ Oh my god’

Fuck, no, please don’t do this.

Chapter Text

Ellie was frozen; why was the world against her? Dina was staring at her like she was a feral animal. She felt small, stupid, alone.

Tommy eventually caught up to them, followed by Maria who was disciplining him for running on his bad leg.
Ellie needed to get away, she couldn’t deal with this fucking depressing reunion. She could feel herself getting weaker, courtesy of the infected wound in her shoulder; she noticed fresh crimson patches soaking her tank top once again; this time with yellow streaks peeking through… yep, definitely infected- she thought.

“Ellie, what are you doing honey; stop running from help.”
She deciphered Tommy’s sharp, southern accent despite not being able to make out whose face the voice came from; vision still blurry.
She had to get away.
She fought against her vision loss and noticed a small opening in a window behind her. She quickly sprinted towards it, sliding through the small gap and locking it behind her; using her last burst of adrenaline. They’ll leave soon.. she hoped.

It only took a few seconds, however, before Maria and Tommy were banging their fists against the window and calling for her; seemingly eager for her to let them take her back to Jackson. That was the last thing anyone wanted.
“Ellie, kid, why are you doing this. Please, let us help; open the window, we’ll work everything out.” Maria resonated with her.

“Please, just go. I’m tired ok? I’m so fucking tired guys! I tried to kill her- I tried, but I couldn’t. I was a fucking coward, I’m sorry. Just let me die, all I do is cause pain. Please, please just lea—“
She was cut off by the shattering of glass above her, and Tommy clambering through the broken window; with the much needed assistance of Maria. Ellie’s vision was still fading rapidly, but she noticed tears falling down both of their cheek’s. They were mad, she thought, mad that she didn’t go through with it.

Tommy pulled her into his chest, she was confused but accepted his embrace; she felt herself relax into his arms.”
Come on kiddo, don’t go talking like that, let’s get you back home, ok?”

Ellie remained silent as Tommy and Maria helped her to her feet. She managed a few steps, and then everything went dark.

“Shit, Ellie!”