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Yi Sang had gained his purpose, again. A sweet little mirror that allows him to talk to whom he thought he lost. It means the world to him.
Their first talk, after such a long time, is not an easy one, however. Sang Yi was ever the smart one, and could tell from a moment's notice that he was far better than he had been in the years prior.
“...Yi Sang…How are you faring today?”
“...Fine enough…The sun is setting on brighter lands, now…Even through the pain of the past.”
“...You must be thinking a lot, aren’t you?” He sees Yi Sang nod, and continues on. “Your time in T Corp…It was shown to you again. In K Corp.”
“...It was.” He did many things he regrets, there. Some he didn’t. Some of it was simply a fact of life. He was, even today, still trying to process a lot of what had happened. Equality was odd.
He was equal with his friends. On the farm. Equal with his friends until he was below everyone outside of that group. Then he was equal again. “...I was held as lesser for many years. Due to my status.”
For who he was, for what he was, for something he couldn’t change.
So they went after his work. Himself as a person. His everything…
His very self was targeted. Simply because others saw themself as more.
“That you were. In K corp it was a tad better, was it not?”
“...Restricted as I was, my wings were barely allowed a flutter. Nary that, I was restricted while feeling free.”
The pure color of white still is in his eyes, sometimes. Purity doesn’t suit him much either, he thinks.
Sang Yi’s wings spread, showing their impressive range. His wings…He couldn’t see them. There weren't words for them. There was no set of words that could fit the colors spreading out across panes of glass, linking together yet breaking apart all the same. Yi Sang wishes he could give him even a momentary glimmer of what he sees.
Maybe he’ll try anyway, one day.
“Yi Sang…” He stops, as if saying his name just to hear it. “You’re free, now. Your wings have spread and are still spreading…As if this is just your beginning. The past has harmed you and helped you.”
“Very much so.”
“...Do you hold onto those feelings?”
He pauses, “...When you feel lesser, do you ever feel equality? Or is equality only truly admired after being lesser for so long?”
“I am not the person to ask this to.” The wings shrink, seeming to fold… “Do you feel as if you are lesser, or equal?”
“...For quite a time I was lesser.” Gregor’s suffering had made him remember the past, after all. Hermann, he saw at least once, so seeing her again had made him shrink internally.
She saw everyone as lower. So in that way, equality was there too.
“But as time went on, I was more.”
He pins down at what point he felt more. Calw was one of those moments. Simply because he was familiar with everything. He never met Kromer on a first-hand basis, but he’d heard stories of an up-coming young lady to rule a branch.
But besides a few key moments in K Corp, he hadn’t really felt more than anyone.
“It wasn’t very often, but it was something.”
He pauses again, Sang Yi doesn’t speak.
“...At many points, I felt equal. Right now, I feel equal. For whatever that counts for and whatever that may mean.”
“...Were you ever called names, at T Corp?”
“Many times. Oft day to day.”
“Are you called names in your current residence?”
“Never anything cruel. In fact, many seem to be positive lately.”
“Are you proud of this?”
“I cannot say. My heart and brain are often in different places. And right now that is still much the same.”
The talking grows silent after, both of them seeming to trail into their own separate thoughts. Perhaps of different topics entirely. It’s hard to say. But regardless of the how or the why, Sang Yi does eventually speak up again.
“How badly were you treated?”
“...Beyond all forms of natural cruelty. Perhaps they made new forms from it.”
“...Do you want to see your old friends again?”
“...I am not sure.” He takes a breath, “Two have passed on now. One saw me as lesser despite being similar, and I haven’t a clue on how the others have changed. Or if they have.”
He pauses again, “I am not sure what would hurt more.”
“...I am not sure either. Perhaps both would hurt in equal and opposite ways.”
“Perhaps so.”
Another pause. This lapse is less awkward.
“Sang Yi?”
“Yes?”
Yi Sang feels an odd lump in his throat, but he asks. “...Do you have friends, in your self?”
“I do. And they mean everything to me…Do you feel the same, about the ones you are with now?”
He has to think. They are rowdy and loud and often get into more trouble than they’re even knowing of. But he hasn’t felt more free in years. “...I believe…If I were to have friends worth a life, thousands of lives, I would want it to be them.”
“...My friends are not yours. But from what I’ve heard of them, they seem like they are feathers to your flock.”
“...Yes. I will do anything for them.”
“I believe that’s all anyone could ask for.”
