Work Text:
"Even though we never
said it to each other,
we knew."
"Himiko!" Ochako bolts up in her bed to the sound of her 5:30am alarm. Sweat dots across her forehead and soaks her night shirt. Her fingers grip the sheets tightly so she wouldn't accidently float herself. She huffs, panting in and out until she's finally collected her breath.
Ochako flops back down and stares at her ceiling.
Just another nightmare.
She gets ready for the day.
Blood is hot and thick all around her. Plastering her hair to her skull and sticking to her face, her right eye squinted and blinking through the red, tar-like substance. Her breaths leave her in heavy, desperate huffs.
Ochako knows there's an unnatural weight on her chest. The weight of a person resting their entire body weight onto her, an arm tucked across her stomach, a leg tangled with hers. She struggles to pull in a breath but does nothing to push the person off. They're so warm.
The sun, drooping and dozing, glints off the pooling red of their joined bodies. It stains their clothes; the stench of iron clings to them.
The person breathes softly into her throat where they're wrapped around her. They pull Ochako closer, unhearing of her pained grunt, and they begin to hum softly.
Her voice is so sweet.
Ah. Right. Himiko....
Himiko's humming softly into Ochako's throat as she holds Ochako.
Ochako's eyes have slowly sealed shut over the course of the last minutes. Dried shut by the blood. It's heavy on her lashes and sour on her lips and tongue. Her hand twitches where it's pinned beneath Himiko, and she wishes, not for the first time, that she could touch the girl again.
"I want to touch that sadness deep within you!" She remembers yelling, only minutes ago. It feels like it could've been hours ago, but it couldn't have been. The puncture in her torso still bleeds wet and slow, pulsing sharply every second. That alone is enough to tell her it's only been minutes.
She's tired to the bone.
She can't really feel most of her body. Her arm tingles where it's gone numb under Himiko - Himiko, whose blood is sliding into her through that strange tubing the girls always carrying around. Himiko, whose grip on Ochako is slackening with every second that passes, with every drop of blood that leaves her to enter Ochako.
Ochako swallows. It's dry and it hurts more than it offers any relief. The burn behind her eyelids aches.
She huffs, and prays that when she opens her eyes, it's to Himiko's smile.
"Yoo 'Chako, are you with us?" Mina's familiar voice breaks Ochako out of her thoughts. Blinking them away, the brunet clears her vision to a room full of her friends. Right, that's where she was. It's the surprise party for Bakugou to celebrate him becoming the Number One Hero.
Mina's hand is warm on her shoulder. "Hey, you spaced out on us for a minute there, you back? Good?" The pink skinned woman grins. Faced with the full force of Mina's sunshine, Ochako smiles back, "Yes! Yes, I'm good." She giggles, taking her friends hand and squeezing.
Her unoccupied hand holds a glass of wine that she takes a quick sip of. "I don't know where I just went, but, I'm back! It's probably just the wine." The gravity hero excuses, relieved when her friends eyes widen and lips split into another grin. "Gotcha, girl. Lightweight makes sense for you. Y'know, zero gravity and all!" Mina reasons outloud, as if there's any correlation between the two things.
Nevermind the fact that Ochako hasn't finished a glass the entire night. The brunet just nods politely.
"Well, come onnn!! I'm pretty sure they're about to compare our first Hero popularity stats of the year! You know Todoroki's gonna say something that sets off Bakugou, and I don't wanna miss it!" The acid quirk user all but bodily drags Ochako across the room. Ochako, despite her earlier mood, feels the excitement in her building.
It's their fifth year officially done as Pro Heroes, and while it's definitely had it's ups and downs for them all, it's been incredible, too. To think just barely four years ago they were all in school together...
She swallows, pushing those thoughts away again.
Ochako scans the room to distract herself. There's Bakugou in the corner, leg kicked up with his arms crossed and smirking. He's saying something to Todoroki - and based on what Mina said, it's probably him telling Todoroki he's "definitely got him beat" in the popularity votes. The explosive heroes eyes flit between Todoroki and somewhere in, unsurprisingly, Deku's direction.
Laughter explodes to her left, and Mina slips away to join Momo and some of the other girls who are still giggling at whatevers just been said.
Attention drawn back to herself, Ochako looks to Deku again. The green haired mans also laughing where he stands with Kaminari, Tenya and Kirishima. There's a brilliant smile on his face that used to set Ochako's heart soaring. It looks impossibly handsome, he looks impossibly handsome. His suit is tailored to his size, and she thinks helplessly back to that time on I-Island where he'd worn a suit that looked two sizes too big on him.
The scar under his eye does nothing to draw away from his handsomeness.
"Deku! Hey!" Ochako calls, pushing herself forward and away from those thoughts, too. She thinks she maybe does that a lot, lately. Run from her thoughts. Large green eyes settle on her and brighten. "Uraraka, hi!" Deku smiles widely, taking the last few steps and meeting her. It doesn't upset Uraraka as much as it used to - him not calling her by her first name anymore. He hasn't really, since their UA days. And she's never been brave enough to ask him why.
"Deku. You look nice." Ochako thinks the red that floods his face is sweet, but it also opens a pit in her stomach. "So, Bakugou's finally made good on that promise, huh? Number one?" She giggles, quickly adding, "Always knew he could do it, y'know, if he watched that mouth on him!" Despite her words, her tone is genuine, and Deku flourishes at the praise of his childhood friend.
He smiles with a good natured shake of his head. "No, even with it, I always knew he'd do it. Even when we were kids, I knew this was who he was meant to be. The next Number One." It's spoken softly, but reverently, and Ochako knows a sensitive subject when she sees it. The scars on his hands catch her eye, so she holds out her hand and waits for him to place his in hers, upside-down and barred.
"I don't feel them much anymore. The scars." Deku speaks up again. "They've had time to heal. And.. it's been a long time since I've.. done anything to put stress on them." He flexes his hand with a pop of the bones and a sheepish smile.
Ochako's smile is light and sad. "I'm glad you're doing so well now, Deku. I've been worried about you. You know.. After the war, I was so caught up in myself, I never... I never took the time to ask how you were doing. I didn't even... Gosh, Deku. I thought about it all the time, but I never asked you. And you did so much, so much for us all, and..." She trails off and swallows down the rest of what she wants to say. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry about One For All, Deku." She finishes.
When the silence threatens to bury her, Deku clears his throat, coaxing her to look up. He's rubbing at his eyes that are dotted with moisture. Her heart squeezes in her chest. "Oh, Deku, I'm sorry! I didn't mean- oh, I shouldn't have said anything! Gosh, tonight of all nights!" But Deku laughs, shaking his head sharply. His eyes are brighter than before when they meet hers, nervous and guilty.
"It's okay, Ochako, really! You didn't do anything wrong! I'm happy, actually. Is that weird?" The freckled man sniffles, swiping at his nose. It gives Ochako pause. Had he just called her Ochako? "Happy?" Her lips twist, not unkindly. "I mean, it's not the response I was going for, but it's leagues better than you crying because I.. opened up a five year old wound, or something?" She tries, giggling a little at the absurdity of it all.
"You didn't!" Deku assures her. "It's just- I've actually felt good, since then. Well.. Not since then, it's definitely taken a lot of time. I guess I just feel freer, in a sense. Like letting go of One For All was like letting go of it all. The fighting, the losses, the death... The war." At the mention of the war, his eyes find Bakugou so naturally, so habitually. The blonde is smiling for once.
There's history there, Ochako knows. Between Bakugou and Deku. History that could never be put to rest. And it's one of the things that lead her to letting go of the man in the first place. But there's a spark in Deku's eyes right now that she hasn't seen in years, so she tucks it all away and smiles knowingly at him.
Deku looks back at her. "Do you feel it, too? Free, I mean."
Oh.
The question throws her back to her thoughts. She wishes she could forget, but it burns her alive, it opens the pit in her stomach until it gapes and swallows her down inside, concaving her ribs and bleeding her dry.
Tears mix as they drip down a melting face, a mixture between hero and villain, and something so much more. "These feelings are genuine, Ochako. So I'm giving you-"
"I'm gonna go get another drink, Deku."
"So I'm giving you all of my blood."
Deku eyes Ochako's full glass as she walks away.
"I want to touch that sadness deep inside you!" Ochako shouts, stretching as far as she could reach. Hands reaching, heart begging and eyes passionate in their pleading. Slit-pupiled, golden eyes widen, framed by blood soaked golden lashes. Ochako's heart squeezes. She's so pretty.
The stab to her stomach hurts.
Himiko reaches back for her.
Everything flashes in and out. The shouting, the floating and the falling.
"You have such a lovely smile!"
"You think... I'm cute?"
And the truth was so plain, it hurt, because there was nothing she could say that could encompass all she felt.
"The cutest girl in the whole world."
Those hands reach her.
And when did they end up on the ground?
Himiko's knees knock against her ribcage when the girl sits beside her, fiddling with gadgets as she speaks. "Your words made me really happy, even though I said it was a battle for survival...- But, I can't stand to lose you like this, Ochako-san!" Something sharp pierces her, just under the thin skin of her wrist.
Oh, right... She's dying. Himiko stabbed her, didn't she?
Himiko settles down, curling her body around Ochako protectively. Her blond head rests on hers, nose pressing into tangled, sweaty hair.
Ochako's head rolls to the side - and there she is. With her one golden eye and one brown eye, that's slowly melting away into twin golden eyes. She's smiling, too, a fang pushing against her lip. She's so pretty, Ochako thinks. It makes her want to smile, too, but that hurts, so she doesn't. Himiko shushes her and pulls her closer, starting to hum.
Their noses brush - and this close, Ochako can see the girl is crying. Tears drip steadily down her face. Why is she crying- she shouldn't be crying- "Him..i..." She mumbles pitifully, and Himiko giggles. The sound wobbles, caught on another cry, and then she starts to hum again.
Time passes, and eventually, they're able to mumble back and forth.
"You're so weird, Ochako-san."
"Says you.. If you do this.."
Thoughts come and go, for Ochako. She isn't too sure how much time passes, only that Himiko is no longer holding her as tightly. Her breaths, too, are short and far apart. Her heartbeat thready and timid. Even still, Himiko hums.
Ochako's eyes have long swollen shut, dried and crusted with blood and sweat, but she turns to Himiko anyway. Her lips brush something soft, something also covered in the heavy taste of iron. The softness shifts to gently curl into the shape of a smile. A familiar one.
The soft, warmth presses back, and Ochako loves how that smile feels. It's beautiful.
Her consciousness wanes, as does the strength in Himiko's arms. Her touch falls away just as Ochako slips away into darkness.
She wakes up briefly in a van. She's cold, where as just moments ago she was too hot. Smothered in someone's arms that lulled her to sleep. She feels bandages wrapped around her and a blanket on top of her.
"Himi...ko.."
"Miss Uravity, please, stay calm! You're in good hands now! We're taking you both to get help!" Someone all but shouts, to her sensitive ears, but all she hears is both. Hope fills her so quickly it leaves her dizzy and breathless-
"It's a darn good stroke of luck we got to you in time! By the time we reached you, that villain girl was long dead, and good thing too or else she might've-"
Oh.
A pit opens in her stomach.
She goes back to sleep.