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Rey paced the sidewalk like a caged animal, frustrated and wishing he could have a smoke. God, who would have thought a vampire could have nicotine cravings this bad?
He heard footsteps behind him and turned. Margot was watching him, her brow creased in concern. “You good?”
“Yeah, yeah I’m fine,” Rey lied, his voice tight. Every time he spoke to Margot, his Beast liked to flare up, like some kind of Pavlovian response.
“Sure,” Margot said, not believing him, but going with the lie for now. “You want to talk about what happened?”
Rey sighed. He knew what she was referring to. He had told the group that he was considering joining the Ivory Tower. They didn't take it well. Serif looked hurt, Isaac called him an animal, and Fuego…
“Look… I don’t know what I’m going to do yet,” Rey said. “All I know is that I’m really just trying to consider my options. I feel like I haven’t been able to make a choice for myself ever since this happened to me. Where’s the harm in that?”
Fuego shrugged. “Look, I don’t really know how things are supposed to go either. I’m new to all this too.”
Rey shook his head. He opened his mouth to say something argumentative, but his words were halted by Margot reaching out and touching his arm. He paused and reconsidered his words. “How do you do it?” he asked.
“How do I do what?”
“How do you… go through life, or whatever this is, so easily?”
Fuego laughed. “You think I have it easy? Oh no… oh, that’s too funny.”
Rey growled. “Well, easier, at least.”
“I don’t have it easy, I’m just a little better at hiding it.” Margot stroked his arm, maintaining physical contact. “Do you want some advice?”
“Sure,” Rey muttered.
“I’m not going to tell you not to fight for the things you want. Absolutely, do that. I love that fire within you, but you’ve got to be a little bit better at picking your battles, I think. Some things you’ve just got to… let go and let happen.”
Rey frowned, a little confused. “So I’ve got to keep fighting and also let go at the same time?”
“Pick your battles,” Margot repeated, “and be patient! You’re still acting like you have a limited time on this Earth.” She leaned in and pressed her soft lips to his ear. Rey didn’t pull away. “We’re vampires, baby,” Fuego whispered in his ear. “We have all the time in the world.”
Rey knew that this contact should have made his heart beat harder, but he felt nothing inside but his Beast clawing in hunger. Margot pulled back a little and saw the troubled look on his face. “Can I ask, and you don’t have to answer, but I’m curious, what did your embrace feel like?”
“It uh…” Rey didn’t like to remember it, but always had a hard time saying ‘no’ to Fuego. “It was painful. It felt like the bottom had dropped out of my stomach. My blood pressure dropped and… it hurt.”
“Hmm. So… like falling out a window?”
Rey blinked, then cracked a wry smile. “Yeah, I guess. It sort of sums up my life since then. Just… constantly falling out a window.”
Margot chuckled.
“What did it feel like to you?” Rey asked.
“Me? It felt amazing,” Fuego sighed. “I just closed my eyes and let go, let it happen.”
Rey scoffed. “Yeah… I can’t do that. I can’t just let things happen to me.”
“Well, maybe you should learn how to. Things are going to happen to you anyway, good and bad. Sometimes, you’ve just got to… let them.”