Chapter Text
It’s raining again.
Jungkook looks out the window, watching the rain droplets hit the glass of the cold and dark apartment. Jungkook knows he could turn up the heat, but he doesn’t. It’s almost comforting how cold the air is, how similar it is to his heart at the moment.
Two years ago today, Jungkook met Seokjin. Two years ago he met his soulmate.
Two years ago he immediately fell in love.
How could he not when the older man is as charming as he is? Seokjin always knew how to make him laugh, how to make him smile, how to make him feel good.
But now, Seokjin is just an empty shell. Cold, expressionless, nonchalant, everything he wasn’t when Jungkook met him.
Work is stressful, Jungkook knows that. Work is stressful for them all, but Jungkook can’t handle it much longer.
Jungkook knows soulmates are meant for each other. They compliment each other in the best ways.
But Jungkook thinks that the fates were wrong this time. If they were supposed to compliment each other, why does Seokjin act like this only after meeting him?
Regardless, he expected Seokjin to at least be home on time this time. It’s their anniversary, after all. He had high hopes. Which is why he made his favourite meal as he waited by the door for him to get home,
That was three hours ago. Jungkook ate his portion an hour after waiting and glanced at Seokjin’s cold plate of food before putting it in the fridge.
Which led him to staring off as he sits on the couch, deep in thought.
Is this what he’s destined to be? Is this the life he deserves?
His thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the front door opening and closing. Jungkook doesn’t move at first, hearing the way that Seokjin’s feet move against the floor before he hears the fridge door being opened. At this Jungkook finally stands up, turning around as Seokjin looks up from the fridge door.
“Sorry, didn’t see you there.” Seokjin blinks at him before returning to the fridge. “Did you make supper?”
“You got home late.”
Seokjin looks up from the fridge again, an annoyed expression on his face. “Look Jungkook, I really don’t want to fight about this tonight-”
“Do you know what day it is today?” Jungkook interrupts him, taking a step forward.
“It’s Thursday.” Seokjin closes the door. “What about today?”
“You don’t remember?”
Seokjin blinks blankly at him and the younger man can’t help but clench his fists.
“It’s our anniversary today.”
“Oh,” Seokjin stares at Jungkook, caught off guard. “I didn’t realise.”
“Maybe if you weren’t so caught up in your work -”
“My work is what allows us to live in such a nice home!”
“I work too!” Jungkook raises his voice along Seokjin’s. It’s something he’s used to doing, something the house is probably tired of hearing. “You aren’t the only one providing for us!”
“I bring in the most money.” Seokjin points out. “My job is hard-”
“Mine is too.” Jungkook says between his teeth. “And yet you don’t see me forgetting my anniversary with my soulmate.”
“We’ll have plenty more.” Seokjin crosses his arms. “They aren’t a big deal.”
“They’re a big deal for me!” Jungkook has to fight the tears threatening to make an appearance. “They should be a big deal for you too.”
“Look, we can do something big next time-”
“There won’t be a next time.”
Seokjin’s gaze hardens, and Jungkook has never felt so scared in that moment. Not of Seokjin, but of what his words mean. What they mean for his future. He feels the soulmate bond weaken. Not that he can see it, but he can feel it. He knows Seokjin can too, because his hardened gaze breaks into slight panic.
“Kook-”
“Don’t Kook me.” As scared as Jungkook is right now, he’s certain that this is the right choice. “The amount of times I have tried to sympathise with you, the amount of times I took your side, the amount of times I put up with your bullshit only for you to not give a damn about me.”
“Of course I care about you.” Seokjin takes a step forward. “I love you, we’re soulmates-”
“Don’t!” Jungkook shouts, and the older man stops in his tracks. “Don’t say you care, because you don’t. You chose your job over and over again and I’m sick of it!”
“Jungkook,” Seokjin pleads, but Jungkook hates it, he hates it because he feels bad that he’s doing this, he hates how he’s the one bringing tears to his boyfriend’s eyes. “Please, we’ll work it out. Let’s just sleep on it.”
“No.” Jungkook doesn’t let himself be persuaded, no matter how much the soulmate bond is screaming at him to comfort his boyfriend. No matter how much he wants to, his heart can’t take it anymore.
He needs to leave. He needs to get out and never look back.
“Jungkook,”
“I’m done, Seokjin.”
Those three words alone, as simple as they are, change his bonded future with Seokjin.
The soulmate bond snaps. Jungkook can’t hear it, but he can feel it. He knows Seokjin can feel it too with the step he takes back. The younger man doesn’t react, knowing what he was going to do before he did it.
They’re done.
Seokjin doesn’t say a word, as if he’s in shock with what just happened and suddenly Jungkook feels like he’s suffocating.
What did I just do?
Without sparing another glance at his ex soulmate, he walks out of the living room. Jungkook doesn’t think as he grabs his keys, slips on his shoes and walks out the door, slamming it behind him. He runs to his car, the rain drenching him in the dark before he gets in and drives off as fast as possible.
Jungkook doesn’t cry as he drives, his mind is concentrated on driving only. He also doesn’t cry when he pulls into the driveway, nor does he cry when he rings the doorbell.
He finally breaks down when his best friend, Taehyung, opens the door.
Taehyung is immediately at his side, pulling him out of the harsh weather as Jungkook chokes on his sobs. Taehyung places him on the couch, wrapping a warm blanket around his shoulders before giving him a tight hug. Jungkook cries into Taehyung’s shirt and Taehyung doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t ask what’s wrong, or where Seokjin is, he just lets Jungkook cry.
Jungkook doesn’t know how long he cries before his sobs lessen and his tears slowly stop. Taehyung still has his tight grip on him and Jungkook is hugging back just as tightly. He doesn’t let go as he speaks the first words since he left his house, his old house.
“I broke up with Seokjin.”
“You broke up with him?” Taehyung doesn’t hide his surprise. “I know you said you were unhappy, but he’s your soulmate-”
“Not anymore.” Jungkook clears his throat, his voice hoarse from crying. “It snapped.”
Taehyung pulls away and Jungkook is already missing the warmth of the hug. The other man looks even more shocked than before, as if Jungkook is playing some trick on him.
“Really?”
Jungkook nods, the tears appearing in his eyes again. “I broke it.”
“I’ve heard of it happening, but…” Taehyung blinks at his best friend, staying silent for a moment. “I didn’t realise it was that bad.”
“He forgot our anniversary, Tae.” Jungkook whispers. “And when I told him, he didn’t care.”
Taehyung is silent again and Jungkook looks up to see his guarded expression.
“Was he home late again?”
Jungkook nods. “I told him before how I hate it, how it seems like he doesn’t care. His excuse was always work.”
“I bet he’s regretting it right now.” Taehyung then gives Jungkook a soft look. “You did the right thing.”
“Did I?” The younger man doesn’t think he did. There’s no reversing the soulmate bond. They’re done, there’s no going back. “I could have just asked for a break.”
“Men like him don’t change, he had his chance.” Taehyung takes one of Jungkook’s hands. “You’re better off without him, Kookie.”
Jungkook isn’t fully convinced, but he nods. For a moment his mind drifts to Seokjin, he wonders what the other man is doing right now, how he must be feeling.
He reminds himself it’s none of his business anymore.
“You aren’t alone either.” His best friend reminds him. “You have me, and I’m not going anywhere.”
Jungkook nods. “Can I stay here for a few days? I just need to find another place.”
“Of course Jungkook.” Taehyung gives him a warm smile. “You’re always welcome here.”
Jungkook nods before hugging Taehyung tightly again. He isn’t sure what he’s going to do next, how he’s going to proceed in life without a soulmate, but he’ll figure it out.
He has Taehyung with him, he has to remind himself he isn’t completely alone like he thinks he is.
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Twenty seven messages, eighteen missed calls, and two weeks later, Jungkook finds himself in a cold and empty apartment.
There’s no bed yet, no furniture, no food. Just an AC and lights.
Jungkook yearns to go back to the house he shared with Seokjin, at least it felt like home. This empty apartment doesn’t feel like home.
But he made his choice, and now he needs to stick with it.
Seokjin has stopped trying to reach him a couple of days ago and Jungkook is almost upset that his ex soulmate gave up so easily.
Isn’t that what I wanted? For him to get off my back?
Jungkook sighs, looking at his phone to text Taehyung. His friend has an extra bed he can use as he waits for his own to come in. A lot of his things are still at his old house, but Jungkook can’t go back there. Not yet. He’s not ready.
He doesn’t think he will ever be ready.
But that’s a problem for the future. For now he just needs to go back to Taehyung’s house and pick up the bed.
Leaving the apartment feels liberating for Jungkook. It’s easier to ignore how real everything is becoming, how permanent it is.
He doesn’t stop walking when he walks outside, the hot air hitting him in the face like a brick wall. Regardless, he welcomes it. The walk to his car is quick, and turning on the car is quicker.
When he hits the road, he can’t help but let his mind drift to Seokjin.
As much as Jungkook doesn’t want to regret his decision, he is still in love with the older man. He’s surprised he is, he always expected the soulmate bond was making all the chemistry between them possible. Jungkook wonders if Seokjin still loves him too.
I doubt it, he didn’t seem to care about anything but sex near the end of our relationship.
Jungkook does know that Seokjin regrets it, the missed calls and texts begging them to talk show that.
Jungkook just wishes the older man missed him, not the comfort of having a soulmate.
He wishes things were different-
Jungkook doesn’t get to finish the thought before a powerful force causes him to lose grip on the wheel. He panics for a split second, not understanding what’s going on as he tries to regain control of the car, but he doesn’t get to try before another powerful force hits the car harder, this time causing Jungkook to black out before he could process anything more.
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Can someone dim the lights?
He shuts his eyes tight to block out the light, but to no avail. He goes to put his hand over his face, but his arm seems restricted. Confused, he opens his eyes.
Wait, is this a hospital?
“Jungkook?”
He tries to turn his head to the voice but winces. It is then that he notices how much his head hurts.
“Jungkook! Can you hear me?”
Jungkook?
“Please stop shouting.” He tries to mumble, but it comes out slurred. He closes his eyes again.
“Oh my god I can’t believe you’re talking- you’re awake.” Jungkook opens his eyes again, the man now standing in his line of vision.
“What…” But Jungkook’s voice is too dry to continue.
“Kookie you were in an accident.” The man walks closer, grabbing Jungkook’s casted hand. “A really bad one. They said you hit your head…”
“Hurts.” He utters out.
“I’ll go get the doctor.” The man says before rushing out of the room.
Can you ask them to bring water too?
He doesn’t get to think too much before the man comes back with a doctor and a nurse holding a cup with a straw.
Thank god.
“I’m glad to see you awake, Mr. Kim.” The doctor smiles. “You gave us quite the fright.”
The nurse holds the straw to his lips and he drinks the water generously.
“You were in a car accident and got pretty banged up.” The doctor explains. “You broke your leg pretty badly and fractured your arm. When you came in you were bleeding into your brain, but we were able to get it under control.”
The nurse pulls the cup away and he blinks at the doctor.
“You were unconscious for a week, I’m glad you woke up quicker than I anticipated.” The doctor smiles at him again. “You seem to recover quickly, Jungkook.”
There’s Jungkook again. Am I Jungkook?
“Not quick enough.” Jungkook drags his eyes to the man that was by his side earlier. “You scared me shitless.”
Jungkook blinks at the man dumbly, searching his memory for a name, a connection, anything. But he comes out blank.
“Who… who are you?” Jungkook’s voice is still hoarse, but he knows the man heard him with the way his face blanches.
“Stop playing with me Kookie. It’s me, Taehyung? Your best friend?” He chuckles nervously.
“I…” Jungkook blinks at Taehyung, thinking hard. But he can’t think of the man, he can’t remember having a best friend at all.
“Jungkook.” Jungkook doesn’t react at first, not until Taehyung looks at the doctor. “Do you remember where you live?”
Jungkook blinks at the doctor blankly. “No.”
The doctor schools his face as he asks another question. “What about the name of your parents?”
Jungkook tries to think hard, but starts to panic when he can’t think of anything. He can’t remember his parents at all. “I… I don’t…”
“Hey, it’s okay.” The doctor reassures him. “It’s not uncommon for people who suffer from major brain injuries to have amnesia. It usually isn’t permanent.”
“How long will it last?” Taehyung is no longer looking at him as he asks.
“It could last a series of days, months, or even years.” The doctor scribbles on his notepad. “I’ll tell the nurses to check up on your memory often. If you remember anything, please let us know.”
Jungkook tries to nod before the doctor walks out of the room. The nurse moves to one of the IV bags and Taehyung grabs his hand again.
“You’ll get your memory back soon, I just know it.” Taehyung flashes him a smile. “You don’t have to worry.”
Jungkook doesn’t say anything. He wants to believe the other man, but he’s having doubts. His mind feels so empty right now, it seems impossible.
But the doctor said he woke up earlier than expected, maybe he’ll get his memory back just as fast.