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The front door opens, squeaking when Alex steps inside. Now, that he thinks about it, he should get it fixed. His hands trembling with a cold he can’t wash away, stick that smears in the creases of his hands but when he looks, nothing.
Muffled yipping of a dog, Rocky, coming from what Alex assumes is his bedroom, the door opens and the sounds of paws against the wooden floor, trotting to greet him, the barking only ceasing when he notices it’s Alex, the tail picking up pace, wagging.
Rocky barks once more when Alex walks briskly past, only dropping his hand to graze his fur momentarily. “Alex? Is that you?” A woman appears in the doorway, blonde hair tied back, Amy smiles weakly, and her face drops.
“Oh God,” she breathes out, she’s moving before anything registers in her brain, her hands reaching out, one on the base of Alex’s neck. “What happened to you?”
“Are you hurt?” Amy’s voice is cautious as she speaks, her arms draping over Alex’s shoulders, she guides him into the bathroom, her free hand on the doorknob, pushing the door open with her hip and she has Alex sit down on the edge of the tub.
Pushing back the dark lace curtains that lined the outside of the tub, she flicks the lights on, illuminating the bathroom, it shines on the porcelain of the sink.
opening the cabinets and rummaging through the towels and soaps underneath the sink—this sinks into an almost new normal.
The lace curtains are pulled open, Amy’s shoulders brushing against Alex’s, she leans in pressing a kiss to his cheek. “I’m going to go bowling with Jess, you gonna be alright alone?”
Alex nods, he smiles nudging Amy forward. “Don’t worry about me, Love, I’ll be fine.”
Amy nods, she grabs her purse and keys off of the dining table. “I love you, see you later, darling.”
Alex’s eyes peer out the window, watching as Amy walks down the front porch and down to her car. His phone lights up and he pushes his glass water away, it’s a message from Jay.
Are you doing any better?
Alex opens his phone, typing back. Yes, is Sarah still mad?
Pissed.
She’ll come around. Alex opened up his phone, pulling up Sarah’s number, which had given him an idea. He knew Sarah wouldn’t come to visit him if he didn’t apologize, he was being a bit of an asshole.
And what he was planning didn’t make him seem any better, but he had his reasons. If he didn’t do this, pushing aside how he felt about it, he doesn’t know what that thing is planning what it’s gonna do to him or her—he doesn’t know what it’s gonna do to any of his friends.
It’s contagious, he knows this. It’s painful, if he said anything surely they’d lock him up. But this was real—and its intentions were anything but pure and he didn’t wanna see any of them hurt because they stuck around him.
He’d already done enough damage as is, he dials Sarah's number. It rings a few times before she picks up to Alex’s surprise. “Hello? Do you need something?”
“Hey, I… I wanted to talk, I’m sorry about filming earlier. You wanna come meet me at the park?” A few beats of silence and he gets his answer.
“…sure, what time?” she asks.
“I’m free now if you are,” Alex says, tapping his fingers against the dining table.
“Give me 20-30 minutes tops?” Sarah murmurs.
“Alex, where are you taking me?” Sarah asks, she may not have thought this out entirely by the time Alex had hauled her into—well, what would you call this?
No wonder he and Jay were best friends.
“I wanna show you something cool I found,” Alex calls back, slowing his pace. “As a peace offering.”
Sarah scoffs, folding her arms in front of her chest as she picks up her pace to keep up with Alex. His mood had seemingly improved and perhaps it was just stress and sensory overload playing a part in it. After all, that hit Alex easy and the pressure was on to make something good considering Alex had turned down some prestigious colleges to pursue filmmaking.
And his father wasn’t happy about it, not letting Alex live it down. He was intelligent and there were so many other things he could’ve done—and an actual compliment from his father, backhanded but it was a compliment and Alex took it as that for as long as he could.
Because at least his father would admit he was smart even if he thought his artistic pursuits were childish.
Alex had wanted to prove him wrong too, call it stubbornness or a desire for his father’s approval he was digging his feet into it to do what he enjoyed and prove it was worth it.
Naturally, given Sarah was in Alex’s close-knit friend group, she and Brian, who had done theater for years were chosen to help the film. Jay didn’t wanna be filmed so he was designated script supervisor, and Seth was the cameraman because he liked being behind the scenes—after having to drag Jay away from wanting to do that with Seth—Tim was chosen to act as well despite it not being his thing, Amy off and on did makeup, and Jessica was there off and on only because her friends were.
Alex’s voice snaps Sarah out of her thoughts. “Jay and I were out scouting for places to film a while back—“
“Scouting to film? Why would you film here” Sarah’s brows raise, her arms flat over her chest.
“Well, we got distracted and Jay dragged me in here,” Alex explained.
Sarah laughs. “That makes more sense,”
“Why? Are you scared?” Alex’s neck cranes to peer at Sarah.
“This seems like a bad idea?” Sarah calls back, jogging to catch up with Alex when he stops. “Of course, Jay found here.”
“Besides that,” Alex says, turning back to Sarah who’d stopped next to Him. “I wanted to apologize for being such an asshole while filming, I was stressed and I shouldn’t have taken it out on all of you.” it’s not like he wasn’tsorry, because he was sorry for being so mean. It wasn’t even just not reading his tone like had been his issue before, it was just being so temperamental.
And he was sorry for that, and for what he was about to do. Even if he was doing the right thing.
“It’s fine, stupid,” Sarah says, her lips quirking up into a small smile. “I forgive you, I get how stress can be. So, where’s that thing you wanted to show me anyway?”
“up a little further ahead,” Alex points out, he begins to walk a bit slow and Sarah walks past him.
“You walk like a grandma!” Calls back Sarah, over her shoulder.
Alex’s hand tucks into the pocket of his jacket, popping the pocket knife into place, and pushing it behind his back. He catches up to Sarah, his heart thudding rapidly against his chest. “Again, I’m so sorry.” He croaks the sound barely emitting from his throat.
Alex’s free hand reached out, latching onto Sarah’s wrist, grip bruising.
Sarah’s head whips back, her hair sitting on her cheek when she does so. She’s yanked backward and yelped. “What the hell, Alex—“
Dark eyes widened when she caught sight of what was in Alex’s hand, her stomach twisting, she attempted to wrench her hand from Alex’s grasp and it ended up with her falling on the ground, dirt flying up around her.
“I’m sorry—“ Alex croaks, Sarah’s legs lifting and kicking desperately at him, to no avail, her heart hammering against her chest. The knife rises and is plunged forward there’s a loud hiss and a kick placed sharply against his stomach, knocking the air out of him. Alex rams his knee to knock Sarah back down, he raises the knife again—“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Sarah rasps, it comes down again again again and again.
Sarah’s writhing stops, Alex stumbles backward, hands slick with warm, sticky blood, and his back hits something he doesn’t know an ache blooming inside his skull, heat pricking at his eyes. His eyes screw shut. Eyes damp, blood in the creases of his hands, coated in crimson, soaking his jeans.
The door opens, barking, and then Amy’s voice from the hallway. “I’ve been trying to call you!” Her voice is loud, she’s sure he hears her. “Where have you been? I’ve been worried sick!”
Appearing in the doorway again, phone in hand, her lips forming a deep frown that resonated in the rest of her face, brows downwards, curves in the corners of her eyes. “Is your phone not on? Are you okay?” Amy’s questions continue, the ache in the side of Alex’s head festering as he dismisses it.
“I’m fine,” he breathes, brushing past her in the hallway. “Don’t worry, I’m okay.”
“Don’t worry?” Amy’s voice calls back, her footsteps not far behind, and she shuts the door behind her.
“That came out of you?” Amy’s voice comes out in a harsh whisper, Alex’s back is pressed against her chest, her hands over his as the hiss of the faucet overpowers her voice, her fingers brushing soap against stained hands, the red swirling down the sink. “What happened?”
There’s a dark bruise spanning the side of his forearm, Amy’s damp fingers press to it and earn a hiss in response. “How don’t you know what happened? There must be an explanation! We love each other, we don’t keep secrets.”
Alex’s eyes dart around, Amy’s soft hands covering his, he shouldn’t be touching her hands. Was that his blood? God, he hopes it is.
“I don’t remember,” he breathes, squeezing Amy’s hands, and lacing his slim fingers with hers.
Her eyes peer back at him, darting from his eyes to his jacket and back to him. “I don’t know what to think anymore, Alex,” her heart thudding in her chest, she hears Alex’s shifty breathing.
“I want to believe you, I do, but it’s hard when you keep disappearing and coming back like—this offering no explanation.” Amy’s hand goes to the side of Alex’s face, her fingers pulling away sweaty strands of hair that are plastered to his face. “I want to help but you’re not helping me.” Amy swallows her throat tight.
“I don’t remember, Amy,” Alex insists, his lips twitching.
Amy’s thumb brushes over Alex’s knuckles. “This isn’t the first time it’s happened, Alex, I’d brush it off if it was but this keeps happening! Every night now! You keep coming back like this!”
“I called Jay to see if you were with him—I called Brian—I-“ Amy’s lips part as if she’s about to speak until she’s interrupted by Alex’s weak voice.
“Amy—“Alex's thumb strokes the back of her hand, she wants to pull away, but she doesn’t. “I don’t remember, it’s just… it’s blank from there.”
“You have to understand what this looks like to me, you’re disappearing and coming home with blood on you, you’re bleeding, you’re bruised and you don’t know what happened! What am I supposed to think?”
“And, and, I’m supposed to believe you don’t know remember?” Amy’s hands tremble.
“Alex, you’re scaring me,” Tears prick at Amy’s eyes, she’s now sitting beside Alex, making him sit on the edge of the tub after pushing the curtains back.
“I don’t remember,” Alex repeats a little firmer this time and Amy’s lips frown, her face creasing in concern.
“You don’t remember?” Amy repeats, she frowns. “And I’m supposed to just believe that? You’ve been giving me nothing to work with, darling, you keep telling me it won’t happen again and it does.”
Alex’s shoulders are haunched, his hands wring against each other. Amy scanned over him, splotches of red seeped into his jacket and his dirt-caked jeans.
He didn’t remember, it wasn’t technically a lie. He didn’t know whose blood it was—whether it was his or Sarah’s—he hadn’t spared a glance at where the blood was soaking into the ground.
“Let’s get you out of these clothes,” Amy whispers, her hands fumbling with the zipper of Alex’s jacket, her fingers digging into it as she pulls it down. Not much staining his shirt and Amy pulls it over his head. “What happened?” She asks once more and her throat tightens when she watches how Alex curls in on himself, his hands shaking.
Amy sits down on the edge of the tub again, shirt and jacket gathered in her lap, her hand extending behind him, rolling her fingers over the small of his back. Her eyes scan over Alex’s slumped form for anything else and she takes notice of a particularly dark spot on his stomach, her fingers press to it. “Does that hurt?”
A hiss of pain in response and Amy’s expression is apologetic. “Can I see your hands?” There’s no protest and Alex simply offers up his hands, there’s a cut or two and Amy frowns. She places the clothes in the hamper once she stands up, she rummages for some Isopropyl and the first aid kit. She presses some of the isopropyl with a wipe and then she peels back the wrapper of the bandaid, placing it on the cut. She does the same for Alex’s other hand, her thumb stroking his knuckles.
in the following weeks, Alex gets little sleep, he awakes in a cold sweat. Sweaty hair plastered to his forehead, beads of sweat dripping down his face, eyes brimming with hot tears that threatened to spill, breathing caught in his throat, being forced out by quiet sobs.
Shifting in bed next to him, Amy’s eyes open. “Alex?” There’s no response and she sits up, hearing a strangled sound escaping Alex’s lips.
“Alex?” she repeats, she's crawling out from the covers, cold, open palms pressing to his bare back, her chin hovering over his shoulder. “What’s wrong?” Her fingers rub very carefully.
“Bad dream? Is that it?” A whimper follows and Amy’s hand moves from Alex’s back and her arms wrap around his neck, she’s leaning up on her knees. “Come here, it’s okay,”
Alex flinches at first, but Amy persists. He doesn’t protest, leaning back, his back pressing against Amy’s chest. Her hand resting on his back, her fingers tracing shapes. Alex turns around shortly, his face burying into Amy’s shoulder, tears glistening on her bare skin, his face rubbing against the strap of her tank top. “It’s okay, it’s okay, I’m here.” She breathes, her fingers carding through his hair, placing sweat-plastered hair behind his ear.
“Breathe with me, okay?” Amy’s voice is soft, her fingers gently rubbing his tense shoulders, easing the tension from them.
Listening to Amy’s deep breaths and exhales escaping, Alex copies it shakily, his throat tight.
“Good job, good job,” Amy soothes, she inhales and exhales carefully. Her chest rising and falling, she feels Alex’s breathing slowly, easing back into a normal pace.
Seth clears his throat, wrapping the leash around his hand.
Alex stepped slightly to the side to put some space between himself and Seth’s dog, Bailey, a sweet dog but he’d never been a fan of big dogs, they scared him—all dogs had scared him up until one of Seth’s dogs had puppies and Amy returned with one of the puppies—who they named Rocky.
“Have you seen Sarah?” He asks, concern lacing his tone. “She’s not answering her phone, her aunt called me asking if I’d heard from her and her apartment is empty.”
“You got in?” Asks Alex, raising a brow his stomach flips.
“She gave me an extra key, I found Ruby,” Seth answers. “Fed her but no Sarah.”
“I was going to look for her today, do you wanna come?” Alex offers, his hands beginning to slick with sweat.
Alex steps to the left.
“Is that blood?” Seth peers over the camera, where Alex is standing.
Alex steps closer, his eyes widening at the sight. There are splatters of it, and his stomach flips.
“Did you hear that?” Seth questions, the camera toppling from his hands—
Alex’s eyes fluttered open, not needing much time for his eyes to adjust to the light because there was barely any filtering in. His ears ringing, an ache blooming in the side of his skull.
His hand flew to the side of his head, rubbing the side. There’s something damp and sticky on his hands, staring at them in his lap, some still-damp and some of it dry, staining his skin, his mind, he thinks he can taste it—that it hisses at him—he stumbles forward, his hands pressing to the grimy floor, pushing himself upright.
His phone vibrates in his back pocket, he grabs it. The nausea riding up in the back of his throat. Retrieving the camera as he looks at the notifications, the light burning his eyes.
5 missed calls: Amy
3 unread messages
Alex presses on the call uncertainly as he steps out, it rings and rings and rings and rings. He stuffs it back in his pocket.
With another wave of nausea, he tastes it in his mouth. Alex finds himself next to a tree, heaving, bile burning the back of his throat, dripping from his lips, chapped, he heaves again. heart thudding against his chest, rattling his ribcage as if it’s caged.
Alex doesn’t know when he finds himself opening the front door to his house, the lights are cut off, no TV or nothing, and no barking.
Amy must be sleeping if she stayed the night again.
Alex stuffs the camera somewhere safe, he opens the door to the bedroom, his head spinning. Tomorrow, he’ll bring Ruby to Sarah’s Aunt.
He shuts the door and Rocky’s head perks up, he barks. Amy stirs in bed, her head rising from the pillow. “Alex?” She scoots over to the edge of the bed where the lamp is on the nightstand, she clicks it on.
Eyes adjusting to the light. “Where have you been? You weren’t answering the phone—“ her voice trails off and she sees Alex’s stained hands, her heart drops.
“I can’t keep doing this—“ Amy’s pushing the covers off, slipping off the bed. “What is going on with you?”
No response. “Why won’t you talk to me?” Amy insists, her eyes burning. “You’re scaring me, what’s going on?”
“Why won’t you tell me?” Amy croaks, her voice cracking. She sobs and sobs. Her vision is burning but she pulls Alex into the bathroom, they don’t speak. She scrubs his hands again—she swears she hears him sob, his breathing growing heavy with each breath.
Alex knocks on the door, he feels his stomach flipping again. Cat in arms, soft white fur against his arms.
A woman answers the door, she looks almost like Sarah but she has green eyes and is older—Vivian, Sarah’s aunt.
Alex offers a weak smile when he sees the frown enveloping her face.
“I was going to ask if you’d seen Sarah, I suppose not.” The air grows thick as her eyes land on Ruby.
“Seth said she was alone,” Alex licks his lips, he pets the cat, and she purrs. “I’m sure she’s okay.” He lies, through his teeth. She’s safe, she’s safe, she’s safe, she’s safe, she’s safe, she’s safe.
He saved her. He did the right thing.
His smile doesn’t reach his eyes, something doesn’t reach the woman’s eyes either.
“I’ll let you know if I hear anything, Mrs Reid,” Alex promises, scooping the cat into her arms. He walks off the front steps, not sparing another glance. He couldn’t offer another glance.
Alex's heart thuds against his chest, he thinks it’s gonna beat out, Extending his hand to allow Bailey to smell his hand, the dog’s tail wags.
Alex scoots closer slightly, his throat tightening. his fingers dig into the leash, he hooks the leash over the collar and he brings Bailey out and into his car.
Taking a deep breath, he pushes the key into the ignition and starts up the car. He drives, his heart jumping every time Bailey leans over the driver's seat and licks his cheek.
Stopping the car, Alex exits the car, he shuts the car door. He opens the back door, grabbing the leash. He clears his throat, knocking on the door, keeping Bailey on a short leash.
The door opens, and Seth’s dad coming out of the door, a chorus of barking following him, blocking numerous dogs with his legs.
“Is that Bailey?”
Alex nods.
“He was alone,” Alex murmurs, his throat closing.
He looks down at Bailey, leash wrapped around Alex’s hand, his nervous expression. He takes the leash. “Thank you,” he says, his frown disappearing only for a moment.
“Why don’t you come in?” He offers.
Alex fumbles with his pockets, his throat constricting making it impossible to breathe. “I’m sorry, I can’t…” he forces out.
The man offers a nod and Alex smiles apologetically.
The door shuts and Alex wants to rush off the porch, but he doesn’t. Stomach-churning with each step he took, he opened the car door, got in, and sat down. Hands going to the wheel and his head only knocks against it.