Work Text:
As Blitz walked down the steps all he could think of was how badly he fucked up. His thoughts were blank as he watched everyone around him. He watches as people around him drink like it's the last day of their lives. He watches people rip and throw knives at dolls of himself.
He stops as his eyes fall onto Stolas dancing with the other imp. Stolas, looking as if he's having the time of his life. Blitz stops as he realizes that he really is the problem. That if he never met these people they wouldn't be this miserable.
He continues to walk forward as tears leak from his eyes. He keeps his head down as he continues outside and to his van. He's full blown crying as he sits in the driver seat.
“FUCK! WHY THE FUCKING FUCK AM I LIKE THIS. DAMMIT!” His head slams down on the horn as he tries to hide himself in his arms. “WHY! WHY!” He slams his head down multiple more times onto his horn. ‘I really am a problem. If i never met him, he wouldn't be this broken about everything. If I never existed. If I wasn't around anymore.’
His thoughts come to an abrupt stop at that last thought. “If I wasn't around? Could I?” His face scrunches up as he really thinks about it. “Wouldn't it be better?” He shakes his head hard. “No. No. No. NO.”
He stops. “But it would be better, right?” He hangs his head. “Yes, it would be.” Making up his mind he starts up his van and drives off.
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He sighs as he walks through his apartment door. He goes over to Loona's room and knocks. “You home Loona?” He yells lightly. After a few moments of no answer, he goes to his room and opens his drawer. He sighs again as he grabs the revolver sitting inside the box.
After grabbing the gun, he walks back out and to the fridge, grabbing the strongest drink he can. Popping off the lid he downs the whole bottle instantly. Throwing the bottle somewhere he moves to his couch and plops down.
He pulls out his phone and opens his messages with Stolas.
He holds his eyes closed tight as he hits send. “Guess this is it, huh? I won't be around to hurt you anymore.” He starts crying again. For a moment he regrets this, but he shakes his head. “This is for the best.”
He keeps his eyes shut as he aims the gun at his head. As he starts to pull the trigger, images float in his head. He watches as someone's whole life passes by. He watches from the strangers eyes as Stolas cries and pulls them into a deep hug. More images pass by of the stranger and Stolas laughing together as they watch a movie, at the dinner table. Images of a wedding, of ‘I do’s’, of happiness. He watches as the stranger stands before a mirror next to Stolas. Blitz’s eyes open in shock as he sees himself and Stolas together in the mirror.
He shuts his eyes tight again, and more images appear, this time worse. He watches Stolas waking up alone in bed. Stolas reaches over to his phone and his eyes widen in shock, as he frantically hold the phone to head. “No, no, no. Please no. Not this. ANSWER! BLITZ PLEASE!” His eyes blank as the call goes to voicemail. He calls again, and again, and again. After what feels like hours the phone drops from his hands. “Blitzy, why?” Stolas croaks out as he buries his head in his hands as he breaks down.
He watches a funeral from above. He looks around and notices familiar faces. He sees Moxie comforting a crying Millie. He watches Loona crying between Beelzebub and Vortex. Shock rolls through him as he sees Verosika crying lightly near the coffin. Looking at the coffin he watches Stolas crying over top the coffin. Blitz moves next to Stolas and he hears him speaking. "Why Blitzy? Why? Blitzy why couldn't you just tell me? Why didn't you just talk to me? I miss you." Stolas cries harder than before, falling to the ground. "I loved you Blitzy, why'd you have to go?"
Blitz opens his eyes again, as he stares at the gun in his hands. For the third time he thinks over what he’s about to do.
‘I can’t, can I?’
‘But it’d be better for everyone, for him.’
‘Why can’t I just be better?’
‘Why do I always fuck everything up?’
Blitz’s gaze hardens, “I have to. I have to get rid of the problem.” He points the gun at his head again. “I’m sorry Loona. I’m sorry Moxie, Millie. I’m sorry everyone.” He continues to cry as he starts to pull the trigger. “I’m sorry Stolas.”