Chapter Text
“Jane!!!” Darcy ripped her key out of the lock and shoved the door open hard. “Jane!” She kicked her shoes off in the general direction of the shoe cupboard, stepping further into the house Jane and her shared.
“Jane! Code Margarita!” She threw her handbag on the couch, disturbing the sleeping cat. “Sorry, Sir Snuggles.” The tuxedo cat only glared at her before leaving the room. Now, the cat was mad at her—her day had gone upside-down since meeting with Human Resources and Security to discuss the results of her security clearance assessment. Hence, Darcy's demands for Margaritas before three in the afternoon.
“Darcy? What happened?” Jane rushed in through the open garage door, wearing a welding helmet and heavy leather jacket, looking concerned. “Did they fire you?”
“No, but I need Thor-sized Margaritas.” Darcy flopped down on the couch, rubbing her eyes. The multiverse was punishing her—she was sure of that. Darcy shouldn’t have asked for a little more excitement. All she wanted was a little less boring. Not this.
“Okay, but why are you already home? What happened?” Jane took the helmet off and sat on the couch table before Darcy, patting her friend’s thigh in sympathy but mindful of her dirty fingers.
“They sent me home to take care of some business they discovered during their security check for my governmental security clearance.” Darcy lifted her hands a little to look at Jane from beneath them.
“Wow. That doesn’t sound good.” Jane got up, squeezing one of Darcy’s forearms. “I clean up and get the good Tequila. And you, go and change into something comfortable. Let’s meet in fifteen minutes on the patio, then we have Margaritas and analyze your situation. We won’t stop until we have a solution for your problem. We are badass scientists and women—there isn’t anything we can’t do.”
“Thanks, Jane. You’re the best. ” Darcy hung her head for a moment before she jumped up. Jane was right. They would find a way. There was no need for self-pity—her situation wasn't as bad as it sounded. She wasn’t fired or dying. It was just strange and didn’t really affect her. It hadn’t in the last year. Something like this could only happen to her.
Twenty minutes later, the blender made wonderful loud noises as Jane prepared the Margaritas. It was music to Darcy’s ears. She dipped the oversized Margarita glasses in lemon juice and salt—they were classy when they drank in the middle of the day.
Jane stopped the blender and unlocked the jug. “So, what happened?”
“Your friend, Darcy Lewis, is married not to one but two hot hunks of men, Jane Foster.”
The unexpected voice coming from Jane’s left side startled her, and she did the only sane thing she could think about, throwing the blender jug full of their iced Margaritas at the female stranger.
Darcy had the same idea, jugging a lemon.
The blonde woman effortlessly caught the jug and lemon. She opened the lid of the jug, taking a big gulp. “Not bad, but it needs more Tequila.”
“Who the fuck are you?” Jane held the bottle of Tequila as if it was a bat. That woman had some nerve, invading their home and then drinking their booze.
“Hey, don’t waste the alcohol.” The stranger put the jug on the table and threw the lemon back at Darcy.
“Listen!” Jane started, but Darcy stopped her.
“Jane, stop. This is Yelena Belova. She’s the private eye I hired to help me with my case.” Darcy turned to the newcomer. “I didn’t think to see you so soon.”
“I’m good,” Yelena smirked and sat in a patio armchair, pouring the Margarita into the glasses Darcy prepared. “And most people are so stupid—they share everything on social media nowadays. That made it easy.”
“So, you already found him?” Darcy took the glass closest to her, taking a sip.
“Them!” Yelena took a folder out of her bag. “As in two.”
Jane looked at them, shaking her head. They lost her. She hated the feeling. She needed to know what was going on. “Darcy! What is going on?”
Darcy stared wide-eyed at Yelena before she looked at Jane, handing her the other glass. “You know I had the briefing for my security clearance today. Jennifer, the head of the Legal Department, told me that they discovered that I was married during the security assessment, and it wasn’t in my paperwork from HR. They asked me why I didn’t report it as I should have. BUT Jane! I didn’t know I was married. So, Nat, the head of security, you know Nat, we had tacos with her last month, told me to talk to Yelena.”
“Yeah, and my sister gave me important info about the date and the location of the wedding. From there on, it was easy to find her husbands. Like I said, social media made it easy.”
“Your sister?” Darcy again stared at Yelena.
“Yeah, Natasha is my sister.” Yelena took the jug and drank.
Jane felt left out, but at least she had a Margarita. And it was so good. But she had questions. Yelena always used the plural when she spoke about Darcy’s spouse.
“Okay, so you’re married.” Jane pointed at Darcy and then at Yelena. “You always say husbands. What does that mean? Isn’t that illegal?”
“In the United States of America, it is illegal if you aren’t a male Mormon, but there are some places in the world where it is totally normal, like Saint Corine, a little island in the Caribbean. ” Yelena grabbed the bag of tortilla chips and opened it. “You got any dips for the chips?”
Darcy just stared.
Jane kept an eye on her friend but handed the dip to Yelena. “Weren’t we on Saint Corine last year during the total solar eclipse?”
“Yeah, you were.” Yelena dipped and ate the taco tortilla chips slowly.
“Oh, fuck!” Darcy blinked and rubbed her hand over her face.
“So, you remember.” Jane looked concerned at Darcy.
“I think so.” Darcy drank two big gulps from her Margarita. “The pride party at the beach?!”
“Bingo!” Yelena said, opening her folder. “Do you know their names, or should I?”
“Please, I’m not sure.” Darcy sunk further into the cushion of the patio couch.
Jane got up and sat next to her best friend, hugging her from the side.
Yelena handed them two pictures. “The blonde guy is Steven Grant Rogers, and the brunette is James Buchanan Barnes called Bucky. Both are from Brooklyn. One is a firefighter, and the other is a paramedic.”
“You recognize them?” Jane asked.
“Yeah, we danced and had fun together. Steve and Bucky were sweet and respectful. They brought me to the hotel and expected nothing but me to get into my room safely.”