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“Nancy, phone!” A voice calls from downstairs.
“God, what is this, the third time today? Someone’s popular,” Robin giggles to herself, eyes looking up to watch Nancy’s reaction. Nancy gives a nervous smile in return, moving various bottles of nail polish around her to get up.
“Nancy!” Her father shouts impatiently again.
“Yeah, must be,” Nancy sighs, leaving her room to hurry down the stairs.
“What are you, annoyed? ” Robin jokes back to her, smiling. She continues to coat her thumb nail in a hideous neon green, but somehow wound up buying it because Nancy Wheeler convinced her to. She still finds it surreal to be in Nancy’s room, painting her nails and sharing gossip on a Saturday night. Robin’s clothes and makeup are stuffed in a small duffel bag, slumped in a corner of the room.
They’ve taken turns alternating houses and weekends, finding it incredibly comforting to keep each other close after everything that's happened to their group. Nancy was the first to propose the idea of Robin staying the night weeks ago, filling her urge for the blonde girl to stay by her side a little longer.
Robin had been lonely too, and years ago if she’d told herself she considered Nancy Wheeler as one of her best friends, she’d never believe it.
“Anyways,” Nancy quickly sits back down next to Robin, bumping her leg into Robin’s playfully. “I think I’ll alternate my colors.”
“Who was it?”
“It was nothing. Stupid,” Nancy purses her lips tightly, mindlessly shaking her head. She rummages through the paint in front of her, avoiding any eye contact with Robin.
“Are you okay? Nance? Who was it?” Nancy should’ve known by now, Robin was entirely too nosy for a simple response.
“It was just Johnathan,” Nancy replies, quietly. She often found herself not being able to keep anything from the other girl. Something about the way Robin’s eyes would soften made her spill all her darkest secrets.
Robin can feel her face heating up. “Well- what, what did he want- oh shit,” she stammers out, having knocked over a bottle of nail polish remover. “Sorry- I’m sorry, here-” she stands up to get a box of Kleenex, spreading the tissue over Nancy’s carpet.
Nancy helps her pat the tissue in, soaking up the alcohol. “Don’t worry about it.”
“So what did he want, exactly?” Robin’s voice gets higher without her permission. She clears her throat. “How long has he been calling?”
Nancy sighs deeply, shrugging. “I don’t know, over a month? He calls a lot.”
“Over a month?” Robin’s voice wavers slightly. She can hear her heart beating loudly in her ears. She hopes her face has returned to normal, but she fears she can still feel the burning heat radiate from it. God, why couldn’t she be normal around anyone?
Nancy says something that Robin doesn’t catch. “Sorry?”
“Are you jealous or something?” Nancy repeats, annoyed. “You know how complicated it’s been with him.”
“‘Course not! I mean I like- I like Johnathan, he was nice to me. He spoke like two words to me but you know- nice guy.” Robin doesn’t realize how fast she’s nodding, her words spilling from her mouth a million miles a minute. “Nice, nice guy. He’s really nice.”
“Okay…” Nancy creases her eyebrows, ignoring Robin’s gibberish. “Yeah, he is nice. We’ve been through a lot.”
“I thought you guys were broken up? Didn’t you- say that?” Robin smiles tightly.
“Well yeah- but,”
“And he was keeping things from you!” Robin cringes at Nancy’s annoyed expression. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to cut you off.” Suddenly she’s the same girl she was nearly a year ago, not being able to keep her mouth shut around Nancy when everything was going down.
“Yeah well, sometimes that’s what guys do, Robin. Not like you’d know,” Nancy says sharply.
Robin’s eyes fill with hurt, her mouth parting slightly. “I've…been in a relationship,” she says hesitantly. She immediately regrets it, obviously never having told Nancy. A few weeks with Vickie might not have been a serious relationship but hey, it was something.
Nancy scowls. “What, in the first grade? That doesn’t count. I’m an adult, I know what I’m doing.”
“Do you? Johnathan isn’t- he’s not anything interesting, really Nance, I mean the guy turned into a stoner and barely even called you when he was in California. You said it yourself you were so hurt and-”
“Can you just- stop talking? Please.” Nancy looks away, knowing she came off too harshly.
Nancy’s words hurt Robin a little more than they should, but she finds herself unable to follow her wishes. “But I’m not… I’m not jealous.” Robin’s face flushes once again, and she pushes down the nauseous feeling that piles itself in her stomach.
Nancy looks up at her, expressionless.
“I’m not jealous,” Robin whispers, again. She doesn’t dare to break the eye contact that Nancy holds. The world around them seems to fall silent, only the quiet sounds of their breathing are heard, Robin’s heavier than Nancy’s.
Nancy ignores the voice inside her that says to lean in, to close their already minimal distance. The way Robin is looking back at her weakens her heart, so she decides to look away.
“Should we see if dinner’s ready?”
-
Hours pass, and nighttime falls over the town of Hawkins.
Words had barely been spoken to each other since, not like there was anything to say after that, anyway. Both of the girls were left in thought, and Nancy found it surprising that Robin hadn’t left after how harsh she’d been.
Robin had already gotten ready for bed and had curled up on her side of Nancy’s mattress like she always did. At first glance, it’d look like nothing had happened between them at all, with Nancy getting un-ready in the bathroom and Robin waiting for her to come back. Nancy brushes through her curls, staring at herself through the mirror.
She has an idea to sleep on the couch in her living room downstairs instead, but ultimately decides to stand her ground.
Robin says nothing as Nancy climbs into bed, pulling her comforter in her direction, and turning off her room light. The silence is as loud as ever, as both girls rack their brains over what to say.
Time passes, and Nancy is the first to break. She parts her mouth to speak, then closes it as she begins to shake with nerves. Clenching her hands into fists, she whispers.
“Can you…give me a reason,” Nancy pauses, unsure if Robin is still awake or not. She could be saying it all for nothing and she wanted to do this right. She wanted to do something right. She hears Robin turn around next to her, telling her she was listening.
Nancy does the same, finding Robin’s eyes in the dark. She continues. “...that I shouldn’t get back together with him?”
Yes. Robin thinks immediately, and several reasons start pouring into her mind. He’s arrogant. He doesn’t listen to you. He knows he messed up which is why he can’t let you go. He’s bad at communication and confrontation, he doesn’t reach out… I can treat you better.
But she doesn’t say any of it.
“I don’t want you to be unhappy…” Nancy feels the soft tickle of Robin’s breath on her lips. In all of their time spent together, they’ve never been so close.
“I’m not unhappy,” Nancy whispers. “I want you to give me a reason.”
Robin feels her heart begin to beat faster. Like earlier, they don’t break the eye contact they've created, as everything around them goes silent. Quiet breaths fill their space and they can almost taste the sweetness of each other.
Even in the dark, Nancy’s gaze was still so demanding. “Please,” she murmurs. She shifts, resting her weight on her arms instead, lifting her upper body. She looks to Robin again, waiting. A warm feeling washes over her as Robin’s fingers slowly trace one of her exposed arms, touching her in a way no one had ever before.
Nancy bites the corner of her bottom lip, blue eyes pleading.
“Nance…” The word is swallowed as Robin lifts herself to lean over Nancy, finally pressing her lips to hers. Nancy’s eyes stay closed, even as Robin parts from her, only granting her one kiss. Just in case Nancy maybe didn’t want this, to be kissing Robin instead of a boy who wanted her as much as Robin did.
But Nancy didn’t deter.
The anticipation of carefully watching Nancy’s eyes flutter open is short-lived. Nancy wants this just as much as she did. Nancy leans in slowly, lips brushing teasingly before she kisses Robin again. She allows Robin to lean over her, touch her, and kiss her like she’s never been kissed.
Robin can only hope and pray that she is a good enough reason.