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"Hah!? You want me to do what!?" Chuuya burst out in surprise and anger loud enough for the entire building to hear, before clearing his throat.
"You heard me, Chuuya-kun. I want you to go and spend a night at Dazai-kun's house, it'll help you get along better." Mori spoke softly, obviously hinting for the mafioso in front of him to shut up.
This wasn't the important mission Chuuya was called to do, right?
"A- Alright, then boss. I'm on my way." Chuuya grimaced in preparation for chaos before he took his leave, heading home to pack a quick bag of necessities.
The mafioso had a bad feeling when he was called to the boss's office; but once again- he couldn't just ignore it. It was his boss. The Mafia boss.
He went home and collapsed on his bed, followed by a groan. "Out of all the people in the Armed Detective Agency, why the bandaged bastard!? I would've prefered the tiger kid, I heard he's nice- or even that 'master detective' or whatever.!"
"It's like the shitty mackerel is haunting me. I'm sure of it!" Chuuya complained as he stuffed a bunch of crap into a backpack, angrily swinging it over his shoulder as he slammed the front door open and closed it, heading to the apartment he dreaded so much.
He used his motorcycle, parking it neatly outside the dorms before he went up the steps and started assaulting Dazai's door.
Dazai's head perked up as he finished arranging his pillows, a smirk on his face as he opened the door (which was being knocked upon harshly).
"Ouch!" He was met with a smack to the head the second he peeked it open, though he let the short man in. "What's wrong, chibi?"
"I told you not to call me that, and what's wrong is the fact that I'll have to put up with your shady ass for a night." Chuuya mumbled, dropping his stuff by the door as he took off his shoes to enter- the place was a mess, sure but it seems the mackerel actually put in a bit of effort to prepare; for one the empty bottles of sake and old bandages which were usually on the floor were gone, and a pillow along with a blanket were also set up on the couch.
Cheap wine was placed on the table- and Chuuya honestly didn't care about the price as long as it was wine; not to mention he was actually really pleased with the set up. "Damn, you.. actually put some effort into this, thanks I guess."
Dazai smirked. "Of course I did, how could I let my poor hat rack sleep on the floor~" He teased as he got two wine glasses from the cupboard.
"If you didn't prepare anything, I would've slept in your bed. You'd have been on the floor." Chuuya clarified, and Dazai chuckled. "Oh chibi~ your words wound me!" Dazai dramatically joked, as he took a seat while pouring into the glasses.
Then his eyes widened and a smirk crossed his face as he continued to pour, setting down the bottle. "Oh wait! I didn't realize you were so eager to jump into my bed, slug!" He leaned into tease, when Chuuya turned red. "Absolutely not, that's disgusting, fucking womanizer!!" the mafioso yelled as he grabbed on of the pillows on the bed hitting the taller man in front of him.
"It wasn't a few years ago when yo-" Dazai was cut off by the pillow to the face, a smug grin crossing his face. "Oh, you're on."
He grabbed a pillow, and the two started smacking each other (after Dazai paused the fight to place the wine glasses on the counter), as Chuuya hurled pillows at bastard- multiple getting thrown in return. He'd use gravity manipulation and send them flying right back at him, to which Dazai dodged letting them hit the wall. Loud.
"What the fuck's going on in Dazai-san's apartment? An apocalypse?" Atsushi stirred from his nap a mumbling mess, lifting his head off of Ryuunosuke's chest to ask the mafioso who was at the time reading a book on Haiku. "Language, weretiger. And to be frank, I don't know." Atsushi groaned at the basic response, his headache only increasing as the ruckus from the apartment next door ceased to stop. It wasn't that hard, opening the closet door and rolling out of his lover's arms. He stood up and brushed himself off.
"Nghh~" Atsushi grumbled as he yawned, stretching. He bluntly walked over to the thin walls, giving it a knock. "Hey!! Could you guys quiet down in there? For fuck sake, I'm trying to get some sleep here!" The weretiger yelped, and that stopped the ruckus for a minute.
"Watch your language, weretiger! Don't you dare speak to Dazai-san like that!" The mafioso got up in alarm, telling off his rival (?) for speaking like that.
"Oh yeah? What're you going to do about it?" Atsushi stuck his tongue out, and barely dodged the sharp Rashomon tendril swung at him.
Atsushi leaned forward, jumping onto Ryuunosuke. "You wanna fight?" Well.. Kyoka had gone a few doors over for a sleepover with Akiko, after all..
"What if I do?" The mafioso replied with a smirk, shoving Atsushi off of him and biting into the weretiger's shoulder.
Atsushi yelped in surprise, nearly leaping back before Rashomon dragged him back down- his hands transforming into paws as he slipped out of his shirt."Ah!"
"Holy shit, Atsushi swore." Dazai whispered to Chuuya as they put their hands and ears against the thin drywall, listening through the walls. "He's your subordinate, after all."
Dazai pouted. "What's that supposed to mean...?~" He whined.
They froze their playful banter upon hearing the voice of a certain mafioso- "Watch your language, weretiger! Don't you dare speak to Dazai-san like that!"
"Why is Akutagawa there?" Chuuya asked Dazai with curiosity. "I meant for them to get together, but damn that was quick..!"
"You meant for them to what!? They're not your plaything!"
Dazai earned another smack in the face with a pillow from the short hat rack, and thus the very violent fight continued.
"Dazai.. I'm not even surprised." Kunikida mumbled as he finished berating the man in front of him. "You managed to break the floor, make three holes in the wall, knock a door off of it's hinges all with a pillow." The stern man took a deep breath. "Trust me when I say: you're not going to stay a night with Chuuya ever again."
Then he turned to the nervous and fidgeting weretiger next to the suicidal maniac. "And Atsushi- I honestly am surprised about this one. How did you even manage to break a window? And it says here.. you also broke a street light, a potted plant on the neighbor's balcony, a few benches were crushed, and you also broke the closet door and the bed frame."
"What even happened?"
"A pillow fight started it." Atsushi sighed.