Work Text:
It feels weird.
Fakhri still finds the remnants of the shitty tyrannical system in his blood, his hands and fingers twitching from time to time, craving the feeling of hitting flesh and feeling the adrenaline run through his veins.
It feels weird, yet strangely normal to be loitering around at the back of the school with a cigarette in hand and shirt untucked. Even after they’ve burnt the entirety of the High Council away at a bonfire a year ago.
He takes another hit from the cigarette, leaning back against the wall as he blows the smoke into the air.
“Nasib baik warden tak round hari ni,” Fakhri is startled from his own thoughts when a familiar voice fills the silence.
Fakhri shrugs, unbothered by Kahar’s statement, “Bukan tak round. Dah round. Tiga puluh minit. Jap gi ku blah,”
Kahar hums and stands next to Fakhri in silence. He doesn’t ask for a stick, and Fakhri doesn’t offer him one. The older boy unwraps a lollipop instead, shoving it into his mouth wordlessly before casually shoving his hands into his pockets.
Fakhri checks the time and stubs out the cigarette. When the fire is completely out, he hides the cigarette butt in his shoe. Kahar is amused, but doesn’t say anything. Fakhri is about to leave when Kahar stops him with a hand against his chest.
“Kau pahal? Nak gaduh?” Fakhri shoves his hand away, jaw tight.
Kahar clenches his own jaw in anger, waving an unopened lollipop in front of Fakhri’s face, “Bukan, setan. Nak borak sekejap. Kan aku nak amik result japgi,”
“Taulah, tapi... Asal kau nak ku stay pulak?” Fakhri grumbles, but he snatches the lollipop from Kahar, opening and shoving it into his mouth.
Kahar chuckles but doesn’t offer an answer. He just squats down, leaning against the wall; Fakhri follows him, “Kau nak duduk sini sampai warden datang ke?”
“Tak buat salah pun, kan? Bukan smoke, lollipop je,” Kahar says cheekily, and Fakhri can’t help but snort out a laugh.
Kahar sighs, “Aku tak tau nak buat apa lepas ni,”
“Maksud kau?” Fakhri asks.
“STPM ke? Kerja ke? Mana satu aku nak pilih? Tu maksud aku,” Kahar gives a little more context.
Fakhri sighs, “Nak tolong kau pun aku tak tau cam mana. Aku sendiri serabut. SPM jauh lagi ni, tapi otak dah macam kena peram,”
Kahar laughs, and Fakhri just smiles. They sit in silence, mouthing at their own lollipops. Kahar clears his throat, “Nombor kau masih sama?”
Fakhri scoffs, “Wei, kau lupa kau dah jahanamkan fon aku?”
Kahar looks at him in disbelief, “Dah setahun, Fakhri. Kau tak beli baru? Kau nak aku replace? Aku okay je nak belikan,”
“Acah je. Adalah…” Fakhri pulls out a phone from his pocket, it's a red Nokia, “Comelkan?”
Kahar huffs out a laugh, “Haah. Comel,”
Fakhri passes it to him, “Nombor kau,”
Kahar types in his number on the keypad, and Fakhri leans in to see what he saves his number as. He doesn’t realise that he’s basically leaning on Kahar’s shoulder.
Save this number as Kapla (A. Kahar) ?
Yes / No
“Boleh?” Kahar softly asks Fakhri, lips grazing his forehead when he turns his head.
Fakhri nods, before he realises what he’s doing, “Sorry, aku tak–,”
“Santai. Stay je kat situ,” Kahar pulls his head back down onto his shoulder, passing his phone back to him.
“Kau datang sorang ke?” Fakhri asks.
Kahar shakes his head, “Keem, Zahrin, Fahmi kat DM. Tengah nak curi aiskrim korang,”
“Macam sial,” Fakhri laughs.
They sit in a comfortable silence once again. Kahar ended up resting his head on top of Fakhri's.
“... Ri, kau ingat aku gila ke nak masuk IT? Programming," the older boy suddenly asks.
Fakhri shakes his head, “Tak gila. Cool pe, ada coding semua. Macam hacker. Aku nak masuk Marine Aquaculture,”
“Cute,” Kahar hums, “Abang kau? Business lah, kan?”
“Naim? Tak lah. Ku ingat dia nak amik Aeronautical Science,” Fakhri corrects him.
Kahar hums. Fakhri sighs, “... Kau– Kau lega tak lepas SPM masa tu? Bila dah berambus dari sini,”
“Tak,” Kahar responds with no hesitation, “Tak lega pasal aku tak dapat habiskan misi aku,”
“Misi, eh? Apa unfinished business kau?” Fakhri asks, amused.
Kahar shakes his head, his voice soft and full of adoration, “Tak boleh bilang, tapi… aku ingat dah lengkap dah sekarang,”
Fakhri swallows down the lump in his throat, “Kahar–,”
“Aku tahu. Kau pun tahu, kan? Nak buat macam mana, Fakhri? Perasaan tak boleh kawal, tapi nafsu boleh kan?” Kahar says, hesitantly pressing a kiss to the crown of his head.
Fakhri slowly intertwined his fingers with Kahar’s, not trusting himself to say anything. The gentle gust of wind that cools the afternoon air cools their skin.
Fakhri fucks it all to hell when the tree leaves start to rustle, “Aku sayang kau,”
“Aku sayang kau juga,” Kahar hums, pressing a kiss to Fakhri’s temple.
The wind carries their silent vows to find each other in the afterlife away, locking it up in a box that is never to be opened or touched from then on out.