Chapter Text
Usually, when Percy takes a shower, he doesn't have any major issues–in fact, it's usually the opposite. Water makes him feel great, child of Poseidon, and all.
Unfortunately, this was not one of those times.
Percy's known he could have children for a long time now. It was a very confusing morning when he woke up with a set of very non-human genitalia that he 100% did not remember ever having. That was a very awkward conversation with his dad. Yet, it was needed, because he never got his human dick back. He was stuck with hermaphrodite fish organs. He kinda got used to it though.
Percy also developed a habit of sleeping with any hot guy who'd give him the time of day, including the mermen in Atlantis. He wouldn't ever admit it to anyone, but he was very much his father's child.
This would be how he found himself in this situation–giving birth(?) to a child(?) he didn't even know he was pregnant(?) with. Or, well, maybe not a child? Or giving birth? That doesn't look like a baby. That looks more like-
Oh.
Oh.
Oh my gods-
He was fucking laying eggs. Actual fucking eggs. There were fucking fish eggs in his tub. He was laying roe. He knew he was more fish than previously thought, but this was-
He screamed.
He soon heard banging on his bathroom door, people frantically asking what was wrong. "Percy? I'm coming in, okay?" someone said.
"NO!" Percy yelled frantically. He couldn't tell who was on the other side of the door, too busy laying eggs, but unless it was fucking Thanatos himself here to reap his soul, no one would be coming in. "I'm fine! Just a-" He gasped and grunted as another egg left him. This was actually fucking surreal. This was insane. He, a cis male, was giving birth to fish eggs.
Well, he didn't know if he could be considered cis anymore, but not the point.
"Just a bit of a medical issue! I'm fine!"
"My dad's here! I'll go grab him!"
Percy quickly shot up to yell at Will to Not Do That, but practically crumpled back into the tub, his legs weak already. He was going to shoot himself in the nuts with horse tranquilizer. He could not have said that to a worse person.
He got out maybe two more before he heard Apollo's voice. "Perseus? Are you alright? William said-"
He quickly interrupted, "I'm fine!" He was going to kill himself actually. There was a moment of silence, and Percy could almost trick himself into thinking he'd be left alone, before he heard his lock fucking click.
"I'm coming in, Perseus. There's no reason you of all people should be screaming in the shower unless something is wr-" Apollo stopped in the doorway, eyes wide and silent.
Will tried to peek over his father's shoulder, having little luck. "Dad? Why did you-" Apollo quickly interrupted. "William, go back outside. Close the door behind you. Do not worry about it, I will handle this."
Will asked, "Is he alright?" Percy would have appreciated his concern any other time, but right now he just wanted him gone.
"William." Apollo said sternly. The boy got the message and left after. Thank the gods.
Percy gasped again, squeezing his eyes shut and dealing another one. This was mortifying. He sent Thanatos an actual genuine prayer to come reap him please. Apollo stared at the scene in fascination for what had to be like fifteen minutes. Percy would have preferred literal torture. Apollo then knelt down by the tub and then spread his legs to look what the f-
Percy screeched, "What are you doing!?"
"Were you born like this? This doesn't look like any case of hermaphroditism I've ever seen." Apollo reached out to touch him, intending to investigate, very obviously seeing Percy as a science project rather than a person. "It honestly looks more like-"
"Don't touch me!" Percy yelled, pulling his legs closer. "What the fuck, dude?!" He did his best to cover his bits with his ankles, and wrapped his arms around his torso. He didn't have anything there, but he felt so exposed he did it anyway for comfort. Percy hoped to gods he was done with these stupid fucking eggs.
Apollo picked up one of the eggs and investigated it, turning it over in his hand. They were about the size of a grapefruit. Percy was horrified on every level possible. Both normally and instinctually. He didn't want Apollo touching them because number one that just came out of him it was gross, number two because that was his baby.
Oh, gods, that was his baby. He had a baby. Maybe? Fish eggs have dark spots in the center if they're fertilized, right? Oh gods.
"Put that back, please," he begged.
"Have you ever laid eggs before?" Apollo didn't care what he wanted, evidently.
"Apollo, please."
When the god had no reaction and reached down to grab another egg, Percy snapped. "Apollo, please, put it down. That's my literal baby. Don't pick up anymore."
Apparently Apollo was too busy hung up on the fact he laid eggs to pay attention to the fact that they were fertilized, because his eyes widened dramatically. He looked at Percy with his mouth open and gaping like a fish.
"Close your mouth," the demigod said, glaring. He really wanted Apollo to put his egg down. It felt wrong to have someone else touch it "You'll catch flies. And put my egg back in the water."
Apollo went to do as told this time, except he held the egg higher than he should have over the water and let it drop. Percy quickly snatched it from the air before it could fall. The nerve of that scoundrel.
Apollo's eyes twinkled. "Ah, so you want to protect them instinctively?" Percy hated it.
"Die."
"I'm immortal, dear."
"If it has a soul, it dies."
Apollo stopped short, startled by the fact that Percy's statement rang true, which is exactly what the hero wanted. While the god was busy contemplating the knowledge that Percy unwillingly gained in Tartarus, the demigod quickly dumped water on Apollo, wrapped water around his body to cover himself, grabbed his eggs, shot up, and went into the center of the cabin and away from Apollo.
The god spluttered, jumping up after him. "Wait just a minute, Perseus! I'm not done with you!"
"I'm not a test subject!" Percy yelled.
"I'm the god of knowledge. It's practically my duty to investigate," Apollo pointed out.
The demigod snorted. "So what, you're the god of fuck around and find out?" Apollo shrugged. "That's a way to see the pursuit of knowledge, I suppose."
Percy's eye twitched. He sighed. "Just. Just let me at least get dressed and put these somewhere comfortable, please. And then we can talk."
"...Fine."
Percy walked to his dresser. He turned back to Apollo. "Are you going to leave?" Apollo crossed his arms. "No.”
Percy bit the inside of his cheek to keep from screaming. Apollo already saw him... do that, so what did he have to lose, really? He huffed and let the water cover fall, but kept the bubble with his eggs in it afloat. He changed in silence, putting on some baggy sweats, a tank top, and of course underwear.
After done, he turned around. "I need a bucket," he demanded. Apollo wordlessly summoned one and handed it over. Percy put his fish spawn in the bucket, counting them as he did. Seventeen. Okay then. That's... fine. He then went to the sink, turned it on, and put the water in the bucket as it came out. He did it until the water was about double the height of the eggs.
He then sat on his bed and took the bucket with him. He placed it between his legs and took a deep breath. "Okay. What do you want."
Apollo's reply was instantaneous. "I want to study you."
"I'm not a lab rat."
"I'll make a deal with you for it."
Percy and Apollo made eye contact. Percy pursed his lips and Apollo smirked. It was obvious Apollo had a plan of sorts.
"You said it yourself, those eggs are fertilized. You let me study you–scientifically–and I'll raise whatever comes out of those eggs with you."
Percy felt his soul leave his body and his brain short circuit. "Wh-what?" he choked out.
Apollo kept smirking. "You heard me."
And Percy actually thought about it for a moment. Realistically, he already knew his answer. He couldn’t raise a kid alone, let alone what was maybe seventeen. Gods, he couldn't believe he was doing this.
"Swear it. You will fully raise them with me, no matter what the consequences are."
"On the Styx."
Lightning immediately hit the Poseidon cabin directly, and the power went out. Apollo lit a fire in his palms.
The god whispered, "Well? What do you choose, Perseus Jackson?"
Percy bit his lip. "Okay. I'll do it." he murmured.
"I need your promise too, dear." The sun god looked ethereal in the light.
"I swear it on the Styx."
Lightning hit the cabin again, the power coming back on, and suddenly Apollo's flame was extinguished. Percy let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.
Apollo clapped his hands together. "Great! Now lay down on the bed, I want to see what your internal organs look like."
Percy's shoulders sagged. "Can you please give me at least a day? I'm still trying to grapple with the fact I'm apparently having seventeen babies."
Apollo's brows furrowed. "You should probably ask your dad about this too."
"I am not telling my dad that I fucking laid eggs."