Work Text:
A cry pulled Wednesday from the long awaited slumber she felt like she’d just fallen into.
Her head was spinning, she barely even knew what she was doing, pulling on that lightweight robe over her nightgown. It was only a little after three in the morning, marking the third time she was up before dawn had broken.
The noise made Tyler stir. “Stay -ere,” he murmured groggily. “I’ve got him.”
She was shaking her head before he even finished. “He’s probably hungry. Go back to sleep.”
Down the hallway she went, gliding into the nursery where Dean’s sobbing penetrated through her already pounding head. Her breasts weren’t any better; swollen and sore to even the softest touch, it made her quit wearing a bra altogether for the time being.
Wednesday picked up her child, her head still heavy through this haze that hadn’t quite left her, taking a seat in the rocking chair given to her and Tyler by her parents. Pushing herself back and forth with her foot, her eyes closed for a second’s relief.
She might have stayed like that, just for a few extra seconds if the crying wasn’t getting to her.
Mechanically, she brought her breast out, getting him to latch on. And then there was some much needed silence. A sigh left her lips, her back leaning in the chair.
She’d been aware going into this that having a child was not going to be easy. They’d both been there for Enid and Ajax to witness the change they were thrusted into, and expected much of the same. Except, Wednesday believed she would handle it better than her former roommate had. Back than, there’d been a time when Enid came over while Ajax and Tyler were both working, eyes bloodshot, face lined with stress. She’d bawled, pleading with Wednesday to watch over Aiden for a short while to allow her a chance for uninterrupted sleep.
Surely a newborn wouldn’t be too difficult for her .
Unfortunately, she hadn’t known how wrong she would end up being.
“Where are the other diapers?” Tyler called.
His voice had floated into their shared bedroom, taking her out of the flow she’d started to get into. Was it so hard to ask for some time to herself without someone needing something? How was she supposed to work on her novel at this rate?
Biting back some choice words so as to not upset their baby, Wednesday stalked down the hallway. Tyler was wiping him down, frowning as his eyes swept over the room. “ What? ”
“The diapers,” he said. “Where are they?”
“What do you mean where are they? ” She couldn’t believe how incompetent he was acting. “They are in the same spot as they always are.”
“No, they’re not,” he showed her the empty drawer. She could see he was looking frazzled, glancing down at their child and then back at her. “Didn’t we just buy some?”
“You were supposed to.” He’d gone to do the shopping for the week.
He sighed. “I did . I know I did.”
“Then why have we run out?”
“I don’t know,” Tyler shut his eyes, taking a deep breath. “Just- look, I’ll go get some real quick.”
“And we’ll do what with him in the meantime?”
He was annoyed, side-eyeing her. “I’ll put his pants back on and put him in his crib.”
“ That is your plan?”
“What do you want me to do?” He demanded. “There’s no other option, Wednesday.”
They couldn’t speak as freely as they normally would have. Dean was content at the moment, wiggling here and there. It wouldn’t bode well for him to be distressed by their raised voices.
“When he soils himself, it will be you who will clean it up,” she said curtly.
She stormed out of there before he had the chance to respond.
Things didn’t seem to get better.
The two of them ran on fumes, going through the motions with dark circles under their eyes and a headache that seemed never ending. Any other time, Wednesday might be able to appreciate the way the dark circles enhanced her appearance but not today.
Dealing with a newborn was difficult enough, let alone with these postpartum symptoms that have taken over her. It was hard to tell if she was suffering more from a lack of sleep or the fatigue that had set in shortly after giving birth. Either way, she hated it right along with the soreness in her abdomen.
Her mother tried to give her some advice on the matter, only for Wednesday to shut her out completely.
Tyler tried to help as much as he could, sensing how run down she was. He’d been trying to make it easier for her, making up for the fact that she was the one getting up in the middle of the night more often than he was. Sometimes he came along despite it not being necessary.
She was aware of all this. Still, Wednesday’s temper had been getting the best of her lately. And sometimes when that happened, Dean was disturbed.
She was on the other side of the nursery door when Tyler came out, having put Dean in his crib.
“What?” he said, noticing the glare.
“You gave him a bath.”
“Yeah...” He said slowly. “What about it?”
“I told you I was going to do it.”
He shrugged, which agitated her even more. “It’s no big deal. I thought you’d wanna try writing again. I know you haven’t been able to.”
It should fill her with gratitude. She had been wanting to finish the chapter she started the day she’d gone into labor, but then something else reared up in her- the urge to defend herself and her ability to care for their child. She was not an invalid. She didn’t need him doing things for her. It was giving her this distinct feeling he thought she couldn’t handle this.
“You didn’t ask,” she said, irritated.
His eyebrows shot up to his hairline. “I have to ask to bathe my own son?”
That isn’t what she meant. And his confusion only made her breath out deeply, resisting the urge to smack him with a heavy book. “You know that isn’t what I’m saying.”
The lack of sleep was getting to him as well. “Well, what did you mean?” He said, voice snippy.
“You know very well what I meant-”
“ No , I don’t-”
“Stop insulting my intelligence!”
That had done it. Dean’s crying filled the air, stopping them both in their tracks.
Tyler looked regretful now. Wednesday wouldn’t have admitted to anyone, but she was too. The anger just evaporated right there.
“What could you possibly have to cry about? Just go to sleep ,” Wednesday muttered, trying to mimic how Tyler rocked him. She was certain hers was less effective, seeing as he hadn’t quieted down at all since she came in here.
That was nearly an hour ago.
He’d already been fed. The diaper was changed. She was trying to soothe him.
And nothing was working. What could possibly be so wrong with him that he was crying out nonstop?
She was just so tired . Nothing seemed to be going right. Not to mention, she hadn’t known how much it would bother her not to be intimate with her husband. In fact, in spite of living in the same house, the two of them hardly said much beyond what was necessary for the baby. It wasn’t that they were fighting , although they had raised their voices a few times over the course of the couple weeks since Dean was born. There was just a lot going on. A lot more than they anticipated.
It took a teardrop falling on Dean’s face for her to realize that she was also crying. Tears of frustration that she’d probably been on the brink of for days now.
“Wednesday-”
“What?” Her shout was doing nothing to calm their son down.
Tyler was coming in, not taking him out of her arms like she thought he would. Instead, she felt him kiss her head, one hand on her lower back.
“He won't sleep,” she said miserably.
Tyler did take him this time, cooing. “Hey, Buddy. What are you doing up so late? Your mama and I need to sleep and so do you.”
Dean was still crying, but something in her stomach lurched when she realized he’d started to calm down-if only slightly.
How was he able to swoop in like this and take care of the situation so quickly?
It bothered her more than it should.
“Hey,” he whispered, “it’s okay.”
Wednesday didn’t even bother wiping away her tear tracks. It was useless when he’d already seen them. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
“No one expects you to know, Wednesday,” Tyler said comfortingly. “This is new for me too. We’ll get through this, I promise.”
She scoffed, not saying much else.
With one arm securely holding onto Dean, Tyler wrapped his other one around her, nuzzling her temple. “Get some sleep. I’ve got him.”
“Tyler-”
“You were falling asleep when you fed him earlier,” he pointed out gently. “Go. If we need you, I’ll wake you.”
Wednesday couldn’t figure out why she was almost hesitant to do so. She was exhausted, having been drinking as much coffee as she could possibly hold so the caffeine would do its job and keep her awake.
Somewhere along the way, there came this odd attachment to the child. Complete nonsense, really. There was no reason she shouldn't just go and finally get the sleep she’d been yearning for.
“You’re...” She looked up at him, taking note of how tired he looked as well. “You’re sure?”
He kissed her for the first time in days, slow and sweet. By now, Dean was calmer. “I’m sure.”
When she did make it to the bedroom, she crashed, falling asleep within minutes.