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"Can you hurry up? Or I’m going to leave without you." Alex called up the stairs. Heavy footprints rumbled back and forth between rooms.
Henry stood at the counter preparing his toast. As the sound of his bustling family tornadoed around him. Alex swiped up his coffee cup from the counter reaching across his husband to give him a kiss on the cheek.
Henry felt something wet and soft and examined Alex as he took a swig.
"You've missed a bit." He said, taking him by the jaw and turning his head. Henry wiped the splodge of shaving foam off his husband’s cheek. "There. Beautiful."
Alex stood up on slight tiptoes, kissing Henry with the kind of force that threatened to tip them both over. Alex smelled beautifully of Alex in the morning : a combination of his shaving foam, cologne, toothpaste and now his coffee. A smell that became taste as Henry slipped his tongue gently between Alex’s lips.
Alex hummed.
"I know you think you're global queer icons. But in this house you're just gross." Ísa said now, appearing in the kitchen.
"Homophobia." Alex addressed his daughter purposely not taking his lips off Henry.
"And?" She joked as she rammed textbooks into her backpack. "If I could have one breakfast without watching my parents making out, that would be great."
"It's how you came into the world my darling." Henry said as he freed himself from his husband and set down a small plate of waffles and fruit on the table.
Ísa gave them both a look. "Wow, scientific trailblazers too! I thought I was adopted. But I was a scientific miracle all along." She clutched her invisible pearls. “Does this apply to Artie too?” She gestured to her 2 year old brother who sat in his high chair picking up pieces of strawberry. He offered one to her, but she had a feeling (from the amount of saliva that covered it) it had already been in his mouth, and politely declined.
“No, the stork brought him to us. Naturally.” Henry replied, going back to his own breakfast.
She plucked the piece of toast from Henry's hand and brought it to her lips only to realise just in time that it was smeared in Marmite.
"Oh Dad! You're actually disgusting. Please don’t serve any of the weird British food tonight." Ísa cautioned as she picked up her bag, swung it over shoulder, pushed rough kisses all over her brother’s giggling face and shoved a piece of jam-covered toast between her teeth.
"Any more hate crimes you want to inflict on your parents before 8am?" Henry said as he went through the same ballet of handling Alex a lunch item he couldn't find, despite it sitting 2ft away on the counter. Today it was his bottle of homemade juice.
"Maybe take it up with your local representative." Her muffled reply came calling back at them as she ran off to the car. "I love you!"
"Love you too angel. See you later! Have a good day. "
"Teenagers." Alex said. Kissing him on the cheek once more. Arthur squealed with joy.
“Again!” he pleaded. Alex gave Henry another kiss and their son let out the most heart-warming chuckle. He did every time. It was only bested by the elated scream of when he was being held by both of them and he could push their heads together and witness it up close.
“At least one of our children isn’t embarrassed by us.” Alex said.
“Oh she’s not really embarrassed. Is she?” Henry looked out the window as his daughter climbed into the passenger seat.
Alex drained the last of his coffee, and watched her too. “No! I mean, I don’t think so. I’ll talk to her in the car.”
“Oh really? Good luck!” Henry said. “You know she’s going to go through her rules for tonight for the 20th time.”
“Christ Hen, I’m nervous” he laughed, “Why am I so nervous? Why are you not nervous?”
“Of course I’m nervous. It’s our first Meet The Parents .”
“Yeah but we’re the parents.” Alex said as though he thought Henry might not have realised this fact. “Our little girl has a boyfriend! Am I supposed to play the ‘what are your intentions with my daughter? ’ line or- ” The horn of the car honked and Alex jumped.
“Stay calm, have a good day at work, and we will take it as it comes.” Henry said.
Little Arthur laughed.
He was a generically pretty looking 14 year old boy. Ísa had only ever shown them one photo, on her phone a few weeks ago when she had told them of his existence in her life. And Alex & Henry had held it together in that moment, saving a small conniption a few hours later. Yes, “generic” was how you’d describe Logan. A polite smile; sandy curly hair that he definitely took a lot of time over; a jaw that, given a few more years, would probably fill out to be square. (“I thought he’d be more interesting looking. Less “boyband”. I thought her type would be… I don't know, not that!” Henry had said. “Henry, Oh my god. Obviously I agree but I don't think we’re supposed to say it!” Alex had laughed.)
The five of them sat in the living room making pleasantries about their day. Ísa and her new boyfriend sat on one sofa. They looked an adorable picture of nerves next to each other, sitting at a distance clearly calculated so that her parents wouldn't try to have any (more, because yes the tally was now up to 3 including a delightful facetime with Mimi Ellen) conversations about intimacy. But also close enough to assert that this was a real relationship and not just some trivial schoolyard pastime. All the while the happy couple were nursing their glasses with great attention.
Alex and Henry were on the other sofa, Alex’s arm draped over the back of the chair, absently stroking Henry’s jumper, to ground himself from his own nervous energy that coursed through him. Both their outfits had been curated very specifically by their daughter. Henry’s perhaps a little more than Alex’s. (“Daddy please just wear it, I don't know what 2020s olden days thing a slouchy librarian-core is or what light academia means for that matter, but you don't have to wear a button down every day.”
Alex had sat on the bed with Artie and a massive smile. “Go on honey bee please do continue to tear into your father's wardrobe. We're having so much fun.”)
The only one who was not fighting for their life was Artie, who meandered between them all, picking up toys, books and chatting over the conversation.
He went over to his parents attempting to climb onto their laps. Alex lifted him up and settled him between them. But he wriggled around to face them.
“Ow careful Mister, can you sit dow- no okay.” Henry said as Artie manoeuvred himself to stand up on them. “Do excuse us Logan.”
“Don't worry I remember my little sister was that age, all wriggly.” The boy said, relaxing gently against the sofa cushions. Ísa smiled fondly at him.
Artie said something and wobbled slightly. “Sorry?” Henry said, holding him steady.
“Kiss?” He said. Henry kissed him on his rich caramel curls. But Artie whined. “No. Daddy & Papi.” He gestured with his head towards Alex.
Henry laughed nervously. They usually had no qualms about indulging their son, but now was not really the time or place. “Not now, Daddy & Papi are talking. Look, we have a special guest. Maybe you-”
“Kiss!” he said with the piercingly stern ease only a 2 year old can. He reached out his little hands and pushed them together.
They relented and did a big pouty kiss with a loud “mwah”. Artie giggled. When they looked back, Logan had tensed back up slightly. Judging by the way she was looking at him out of the corner of her eye, Ísa had noticed.
There was a slight shift in the air.
“Should we get some dinner on the table? Anyone hungry?” Alex said, eagerly moving the evening along.
Alex and Henry disappeared to set Artie in his chair and to get the food.
Ísa stood, “What's the matter?” She asked as she lead them to the dining room.
“You don't think it's a bit…” Logan trailed off.
“What?”
“How they’re so…touchy.”
Ísa’s heartbeat quickened. She nervously laughed, as she said “I guess, though this isn’t even the half of it.” As soon as she’d said it she regretted it. Throwing her parents under the bus with not a second’s thought. She didn’t mean it like that, but it was all too clear how it sounded. Her stomach twisted.
“Eesh, sorry you gotta see that everyday babe.” Logan said, draping an arm over her as they sat down. She prickled slightly, all too aware of the irony.
There was an urge in her to ask him what he meant by “that”, but there was no time as she shrugged him off at lightning speed just as her Papi emerged with a bowl of pasta and followed by her Dad with the fixings. They set them down and took their seats. The gathered company all began to help themselves and Henry spooned in and cut up some pasta onto Artie’s bowl.
“So Logan, what do your parents do?” Alex asked, twirling linguine round his fork.
“Oh uh they both work in reno. They do flips and stuff.”
“They work for the same business?”
“Yeah, they set it up together like 10 years ago.”
“10 years? That’s brilliant” Henry added, “Gosh they must get on well to live and work together like that!”
Logan scoffed and tore off a bite from his bread. “Wouldn’t exactly say that, but they’re not divorced…yet.”
You could have cut the tension with a knife. Ísa took a long sip of her Coke, Henry wiped sauce from round Artie’s mouth and Alex cleaned his glasses back on his shirt hem.
Logan cleared his throat and picked up the conversation. “So sir, what’s it like in England? Does it really rain all the time?”
Henry sat up straight with a smile. “Not all the time, though it does feel like it on occasions. There are some beautiful places to visit, and-”
“Like Buckingham Palace?”
“Logan!” exclaimed Ísa. Alex’s hand tensed on Henry’s knee under the table.
“What? I mean, you won’t tell me what it’s like.” Logan said dismissively. “Sorry I just, like, living in Buckingham Palace? That’s insane. I’m curious, sir.”
Henry grabbed Alex’s hand and stroked it gently to calm them both. He was just a child, he told himself, he meant no harm. He could do no harm. “Very well. Firstly, I personally never lived at Buckingham Palace. But yes it is beautiful and I was very fortunate to have that as part of my history. But it is my history, Logan.”
“Yeah but your mom is literally the Queen of England, right now! Why would you want to leave that?”
Alex piped up. “Son, I don’t think-”
“No darling, it's alright. Because that was not my life. You seem a very inquisitive young man, so I’m sure you know,” he took a calming breath, “all about it. I wasn’t happy there. But then I found someone who made me happy, and a place where I could be happy.”
He bought their clasped hands up to rest them on the table, but not before Alex kissed his knuckles. Henry looked into Alex’s eyes and smiled softly.
“Thank you baby.” Alex said under his breath.
Logan let out a little sound.
Ísa’s head whipped round to look at the boy beside her “The fuck was that?”
“Eloísa!”
“No Papi. What was that? What is any of this?” She started calm but it wasn't long until her eyebrows had slammed together and her nostrils flared. “I can’t sit here and listen to any more. What has happened to you?” She was glaring at Logan. His cheeks turned a bright shade of pink under her stare.
Alex and Henry tore their eyes off their daughter for a second to share a look, which said that was probably their cue. Henry lifted Arthur out of his high chair. “We’ll just be outside.” but it fell on deaf ears as their daughter stared down the boy who was becoming increasingly less smarmy by the second.
“Got nothing to say now? ‘cause two seconds ago you’re interrogating my dad like, I don't even know what. Is that why you wanted to go out with me in the first place?” Logan reached out to touch her shoulder.
“No babe.”
“Stop calling me that. I hate when you call me that. It is, you’re a liar. How much have you googled my parents? Oh my god, you’re so weird. And and and you have the audacity to act like there’s something wrong with them.”
Logan attempted to appeal to her calmer nature. “Oh come on b- Ísa you said it yourself, they’re all over each other.”
Her blood was boiling now “Not tonight they haven’t been. And so what if they are? They’re two married people in love. It’s quite telling that you think that’s all over each other. There could be two reasons. You’re a nasty little homophobe?” Logan frowned as if that was the most ridiculous insinuation, “No? Not sure I 100% believe you, but let's play pretend. So it’s your parents? Well I’m sorry Logan, I’m sorry your parents hate each other. I’m sorry they clearly have never demonstrated love and respect to you. But you don't get to come into my house and disrespect my family. Interrogate, laugh at them, stare at us like we’re exhibits in a bloody museum.”
“Wow.” Logan muttered. He had no other retort.
“Yeah.” Ísa turned away from him and stared at the empty chair where her Dad had been sitting. “I’d like you to go.”
His voice cracked as it came out. “How am I supposed to get home?”
“I don’t know. Uber, ask my parents. They’d probably do it, because they’re nice people .”
Logan opened his mouth. And closed it again.
Alex, who had definitely not been listening outside the door, emerged. “Everything okay in here?” He looked at his daughter who had her arms folded and was staring blankly, lips pursed.
“Thank you sir, but I think I should be going now.” Logan said, his nervous demeanour from about 3 hours earlier, fully returned.
“Oh, uh okay. You need a lift buddy?”
Ísa shot a look up at her Papi at the sound of a nickname.
“Um no, but if I can sit in the other room while I wait for a ride.” He waved his phone.
“So long as you’re sure? I don’t mind.” Alex offered once more.
Logan declined and Alex disappeared again. He tapped away at his phone, and then set it down on the table.
“So I guess we’re not together anymore?” Logan asked nervously.
“What gave it away?” Ísa said with a sarcastic smile.
“Okay. Well.” Logan rose from his chair. “I guess I’ll see you at school tomorrow.”
“Don’t remind me.” She replied. He walked to the door and went to open it. “Logan.” She said. He spun around. She was looking at him like she couldn’t believe she was about to say this. “Get home safe.”
Logan was gone 10 minutes later, and Ísa had gone to her room, (“Not to cry!”) 5 minutes after that. After an appropriate amount of alone time, Alex and Henry knocked on her door, to find her curled up on her bed, EarPods in and cheeks wet. She looked up at them, tried to smile and then burst into tears again.
They rushed over to her, bracketing her into a hug.
“I’m sorry.” she sniffled. Tucking her head into Alex’s chest.
“Oh mija you have nothing to be sorry for!”
“I thought he was a good guy. Like, he's never been like that. I'd have never gone for him if I'd have known.”
“If there's one thing I can tell you,” Henry said solemnly, 'men ain't shit'.”
Alex laughed and Ísa looked at him, her teary face breaking into a shocked smile.
“Well yeah, your dad never liked him.” Alex blurted out.
“Alex! Err I what happened to ‘ we weren't supposed to say things like that ’?”
“Well, maybe you can say it now. Oh but don't think I've forgotten about your little profanity Ma'am.” Alex said, looking down at Ísa. She cringed and hid her face further into his chest.
“Come now I think we can let that slide, don’t you?” Henry said, nudging her playfully.
“What has happened to you? Though we were on the same team?” Alex scoffed.
“ Your Dad never liked him. ” Henry mimicked.
The three of them lay there in an embrace that could have stretched forever. Occasionally Ísa would hiccup a sniffle and one of them would grip her tighter.
Little unbalanced footsteps came along the landing before a small face emerged into view. Artie was smiling at finding his family, up until he realised his sister was not.
“Ísa sad?” He said, stopping in his tracks. Alex extended an arm out to him, inviting him over. “Yeah, Ísa’s sad right now. So we’re having a hug. You wanna join?”
Artie toddled over and clambered up. He put his head awkwardly on her chest and tapped her shoulder. “There, there don’t cry any more.” He lifted his head and looked at her expectantly. She pulled him up gently and hugged him tight.
“I love you Artie.”
“Yes.” He said brightly.
Henry laughed, and faux-whispered to his son, “Do you want to tell her you love her too?”
“But I always love her. And you and you and you and everybody!” he rattled off pointing to Henry and Alex and all around before flinging his arms open and nearly flopping backward on Ísa’s bed.
“I wanna say sorry.” Ísa said timidly.
“Papi already said you don’t have-”
“No, please wait. I want to say sorry for this morning. I was only joking, I don’t think you’re gross. Well no more than the average teenage probably finds their parents gross. I love that you love each other. How you love each other. How you love us all. It’s probably really hard for him with his mom and da-” She shook her head off, fighting back a gentle tide of tears that threatened to flow back in. “Anyway I know words have power. You taught me that. And I should have remembered. So I wanted to say sorry if I hurt your feelings or if something I said encouraged him accidentally.”
Alex sat up and took her hand, “You listen to me. His actions, his opinions, they’re his and his alone. Honey if me and your dad know one thing, it’s what malicious intent looks like. And, mija, it’s not you. None of this is your fault. I heard what you said to him.”
"You were listening?" She gasped.
"Hey, hey, you were yelling real loud. But yes I heard you. And I want to thank you for the way you stood up for this family. You have an admirable set of morals, I'm so proud of the young woman you're becoming. I'm proud of you. A little terrified, but heck of a lot proud."
Her throat tightened, her eyes burned and she squeezed him as he fought off his body's need to do the same.
Henry piped up and she looked at him with huge brown red rim eyes. “You’ve lost tonight and you are allowed to be as upset as you need to about that. You liked him a lot, I assume, and to find out that wasn’t perhaps the full picture, it’s going to hurt. So take your time. But Eloísa you don't take it out on yourself.”
She wriggled around to hug him. “And don’t hold it in either. We have a complicated family. Not many out there like us. Your Papi and I know how hard that can be, so you must talk about it. You can talk to us, or Tia & Auntie, Aunt Bea, Nanna, Mimi and Pops, Abuelo, Amy and her kids understand, I feel like Auntie Pez’s advice might be misguided, or there’s-”
“Okay!” Ísa cut him off before her father listed off their whole family tree. “I get it.”
“Good. I just want you to know that you have a huge network of people to talk to. And of course talk to your friends, but in the event that you feel like they don’t understand your situation, you are never alone.”
There was another comfortable silence.
Which after a while was interrupted by Artie bringing up something he had heard. “We go and see Nanna?”
Henry looked to his son, waiting patiently, yet full of excited expectation. “No my love, we’re just talking about her.”
Artie’s face sunk. And then shot up again.
“But we see her tomorrow?” He tried.
Alex looked at Henry, one eyebrow raised. He sneakily gestured a phone above their children’s head.
“Isn't she in Ottawa right now?” Ísa asked, “That’s only like 1 hour ahead.”
“Okay yes thank you all.” Henry sighed. “Not right now. I will arrange to speak to my mother tomorrow.”
Artie heard the buzz word. “Tomorrow?”
“Yes we will speak to Nanna tomorrow. Right now, though, there is a carefully constructed chocolate pudding downstairs that is not being eaten, and I for one think that a certain someone deserves first dibs on it.”
Ísa hopped off of the bed and took herself and her brother downstairs for their desserts. The pair of them let out shaky sighs. Alex took Henry into a crushing hug, resting his head on his shoulder. “Well, that was a rollercoaster.”
Henry pushed a kiss into his curls. “I think my darling. That was just parenting.”