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If Tony’s going to be honest, the first few days without Jeff were rough. The two of them had been inseparable ever since they met and now he’s gone indefinitely off on a faraway crusade against the forces of evil, leaving Tony staring mournfully out the window like a widow who’s husband went off to war. Things only got worse once a terrifying group of aliens showed up and kidnapped him. He thought it was all over until Jeff blew the leader to smithereens and rescued him. Now that he’s back it’s nothing but smooth sailing… is what he would be saying if he wasn’t currently trailing behind the rest of the group as Jeff chatters with his new friends.
“I still can’t believe it took fighting one hundred and twenty seven of those things for Poo to get his sword back! Those are two pages in my notepad I’m never going to get back.” Jeff sighs. His clothes, alongside all the others, are both scorched and torn from their recent battle with the Starman Deluxe and their state hasn’t been helped by the green goop they removed from the pods keeping Tony and the others captive.
“If I never see another Super Starman it’ll be too soon.” Ness agrees. Tony’s managed to suss out that he’s the leader of their makeshift group and does most of the decision making, his hands currently emitting a soft white glow as he brings them to a wounded Paula’s (he was pretty sure that was her name) arm. The torn flesh just knits itself back together in a matter of seconds. It’s mesmerizing in the same way a tidal wave is; powerful and extremely natural for something so otherworldly.
“Hey, Poo! Mind using that fancy-shmancy sword of yours to break the last capsule?” She snaps, shaking the slime from her hair now that her arm’s healed. “The sooner we do that, the sooner we can blow this popsicle stand.”
“Popsicle stand.” Poo mutters, a bit of joy tinging his voice. “You Eaglelandians have such a funny sayings.”
“Yeah, yeah, can you hurry it up? I’m famished and if I have to spend another minute in this dump I’m going to lose it.”
Poo walks over to the last capsule containing a boy in red overalls with an equally red cap on top of his head. He observes it for a bit before bringing his sword precisely at the top, cleaving it cleanly in two. The slime gushes out, carrying it’s captive with it. Poo helps him off the ground and delivers an firm whack to his back, causing who Tony can now recognize as Apple Kid to cough and sputter. As Poo helps him to his feet, Ness and Paula rush to his aid, leaving him and Jeff alone.
“That was spectacular, Jeff. I don’t think there’s any other way I could put it.” Tony’s voice cracks horribly. Hetries not to wince at that. The first thing he does after seeing his best friend who has been missing for a week is swoon in his arms and the second thing he does is gush.
Jeff laughs nervously in that same way he did back in Snow Wood when Tony cracked a bad joke. “I couldn’t just leave you hanging, could I? Really though, I’m sorry I didn’t call when I was away. I kept meaning to but time got away from me and-“
"Hey, you two!” Tony’s head snaps to see Ness surrounded by the cluster of captives, holding what appears to be a mouse with a sign with an arrow in his cupped hands. “It’s time to go.”
“Oh thank goodness we have an exit mouse. Come on, Tony.” Jeff’s hand curls around his and gives a tug, following the crowd. Butterflies flutter in his stomach as he does so, thankful that the dingy lighting hides the blush blooming on his face.
“Okay, everyone! There shouldn’t be any aliens down here anymore, but just to be safe we stay as a group. Doctor Andonuts’s lab is right next to the base so you guys can crash there for a bit.” Ness says, turning and walking off after addressing the tangle of people present. They follow behind him as well, and with the confirmation that no creatures remain causes their cautious creep to morph into a hurried speedwalk.
The second the cold, fresh Winters air touches Tony’s face, he feels like crying. The tears don’t come. Dehydration stops them from doing so, but the crush of emotions that usually come with the action follow anyway. The moment he’s off the ladder leading out of the alien base he collapses into the cool snow, the sun’s light so bright it burns his eyes but he’s back up here and he never has to go back down ever again.
“We’re almost there, Tony. There’s an invention of the doctor’s, the Instant Revitalizing Device, that’ll have you fixed up in a jiffy.” There’s a calmness in Jeff’s voice that feels a bit unfamiliar. Emotions were never his friends strong suit and he tackled them a bit more robotically than normal, but this was with downright surgical precision.
Once everyone’s left the bowels of Stonehenge, Ness leads the group on a short walk to Doctor Andonuts’s lab, Poo and Paula watching the rear to make sure no one slips away or gets attacked. Jeff would probably be doing that too if it wasn’t for Tony’s hand clasped in his. It’s a bit hard walking again after spending so much time in suspension, but the warmth from that is more than enough to bring him forwards and through the metal doors of the lab.
“One at a time, please! Once you’ve rested please move to the side. I’m sure there’s something Doctor Andonuts can do to send you guys home, and if not we’ll just manually drop you off with PSI Teleport!” Ness says, cheery facade dropping to reveal exhaustion once everyone’s lined up. Paula slides him a granola bar that he devours in a matter of seconds.
“Be right back. I’ve got to go talk with Doctor An- my father. For now, you should get in line. The Instant Revitalizing Device works really fast, so you shouldn’t have to wait long.” Jeff squeezes his hand before letting go, leaving Tony to hope that it looks like his rosy cheeks are just from the cold.
As Tony steps in line behind what appears to be a strange disembodied head with legs that Paula called a Mr Saturn, he thinks back to his relationship with Jeff. When he was younger, they were best friends and that was all there was to it. It made sense why he always wanted to be around him or why he smiled at even the bad jokes, that’s just what best friends did! He was content with that until one night when he thought, would it be weird if I liked Jeff in the more romantic way? The answer was yes, obviously, they were only friends and there’s no way Jeff even felt that way about him and boys just didn’t go together like that. But still, he couldn’t bring himself to snuff out that spark entirely. Maybe there was just something wrong with him, but all of the things a man was supposed to do when he had a crush on a woman happened him with to Jeff, and Tony was content with keeping that locked down until it went away.
That didn’t work when Jeff left. The moment he woke Tony up and said that he had to leave, panic struck him like a lightning bolt. You couldn’t just leave Snow Wood unless you were visiting family for the holidays or doing one of the more outdoor clubs and Jeff was talking about flying all the way to Eagleland, which was across a literal ocean. He brought up all these points to Jeff’s face, but he said that he had to go because it was incredibly important. Some part of Tony wanted to say that the only incredible thing about this entire situation was how incredibly ridiculous it was, but the other part agreed.
He always had a feeling that one day Jeff would do great things. The inventions he made in the stolen moments between classes or late at night were small but lovingly designed with a surprising amount of uses. Maybe that was why after the initial confusion wore off Tony helped him escape. Jeff was receiving a literal call to an adventure to save the world with equally great people. Tony didn’t stand a chance.
Doctor Andonuts walks into the room, Jeff trailing behind as he addresses the crowd, promising to finish up a project made to quickly transport people as fast as he can and that everyone can stay until it’s finished. There’s a few grumbles from the crowd, but no one voices them aside from that. The Doctor’s assistant passes out blankets to those finished with the machine. Speaking of the machine… the Mr Saturn jumps out of the chamber, trotting up to the assistant and taking a blanket in his mouth. Weird. If he could come out no problem, then surely it’s safe. Tony places a tentative hand on the sliding door to keep in place as he enters. The Instant Revitalizing Chamber reminds him uncomfortably of the container he just escaped, but everyone has gone through it so he might as well bite the bullet and go. The door has a latch from inside. How considerate.
Thankfully, the chamber doesn’t fill with liquid, instead emitting a soft gas that feels like a pleasant mist. Tony can feel the aches starting to fade and the liquid return to his body. There’s still a deep emotional weariness in his soul, but as far as physical performance goes he’s right as rain. The second the mist stops, he slides open the door and stumbles out. Waiting for him is Jeff, other friends loitering at the door to the lab. “Hey, Tony. Ready to leave?”
“Leave?”
“We can walk you to Snow Wood. It’s close by and there was something I wanted to tell you in person. Unless you’re not feeling up to it, of course! It’s better you recover than strain yourself, especially after what you’ve been through.” Jeff casts a glance to his friends, his newer, cooler ones that he’s been hanging with for the past month.
He can’t let this last moment slip through his fingers. Even though his still-raw body whines in protest at his quick movements, Tony’s beside him in a flash. “No, no, I’m all ready to go.”
“Good. I was a bit worried that the Instant Revitalizing Device would have been strained with the amount of people, but it looks like whatever Doctor Andonuts did to the internal mechanics keeps it capable even under the strain of multiple uses. I’ll have to ask him about it ten years from now.” The bitterness at the end is not lost on Tony. He’s sat through many a disjointed ramble about Jeff’s father, sometimes calm while he tinkered with an invention of his own and sometimes not when he curled up under the blankets of his bed. As they approach, snippets of the other members of the Chosen Four’s conversation reaches their ears.
“Ugh. Why couldn’t Apple Kid have hung onto that book for a bit longer?” Ness complains, currently performing tricks with his yo-yo.
“It’s really not that big of a deal. We have more than enough PSI between the two of us to hit all of the stops we need to travel to.” Poo refutes.
“I just know we’re going to crash into another magic butterfly. Those things are so small you don’t see them before you crash to a halt! I really don’t want to be covered in ash and swamp water.” Ness responds, moving his yo-yo to his pocket once Jeff and Tony rejoin them.
“Jeff, Jeff, back me up, dude.”
“Ness, I think you’re making a big fuss out of nothing. You always manage to make mountains out of molehills.”
“Oh please,” Paula scoffed. “You squealed when you realized that the Counter-PSI Unit worked.”
He’s about to jump in with a defensive remark when Jeff shoots back with a playful, “Like you were any better when you learned PSI Freeze Gamma. I’m pretty sure the Mr Saturns could hear you from all the way across the sea when it happened.”
That’s new. Jeff never had been confrontational, but here he is ribbing back and forth with (if Tony is being honest) a rather scary girl. The soft crunch of snow adds a soft undercurrent to their conversation. Tony let’s himself get lost in the familiar sound until the hiss of snow melting reaches his ears. His head snaps up to see a Lesser Mook, Whirling Robo, and Wooly Shambler block their path.
“Oh come on, really?” Ness sighs, pulling out his bat. “Was Stonehenge not enough for you guys? Whoever destroys the most goons gets to pick where we eat next!”
The Chosen Four slink into their battle positions with eerie fluidity. Ness and Poo take the front while Paula and Jeff linger in the back, Tony beside them. Jeff calls to him. “Help me set this up, Tony.”
He scrambles to his side, grabbing parts from Jeff’s bag and passing them to him as he slots them in with the precision that comes from doing something lots of time. As he does so, Tony’s eyes can’t help but wander to the rest of the party.
They move in lockstep like the world’s strangest centurions. He supposes they are, given the fact that a prophesy was made about them. Ness sends a dazzling spray of diamonds at the enemies, piercing their bodies whether flesh or metallic. Poo’s quick to finish off the Whirling Robo, sword slicing through steel like a hot knife through butter and darting away before the Lesser Mook’s follow up attack can connect. Paula’s eyes glisten cold blue like the ice PSI she hurls out of her hands, freezing the Lesser Mook as Poo whacks the ice block with a powerful kick, shattering it and the creature inside to thousands of pieces. The Wooly Shambler’s running away where it could potentially harass more people. Tony’s worried about a chase when a bottle rocket roars after it and causes it to explode into pieces of shrapnel.
It’s amazing. It’s lonely.
“Jeff, you’re amazing!” Ness whoops, echoing his thoughts.
“It was only a small invention…” Jeff says.
“Are you kidding? Without you we would still be chasing that Wooly Shambler around. Don’t sell yourself short, man.” Ness grins and elbows him in the side.
"
Oh, very well.” Jeff smiles fondly at him. Jealously pricks at Tony’s heart. It’s stupid and childish and Jeff deserves to have more than two friends but why does he have to look so happy with them?
“Paula, that combo was incredible! And Poo, what a show!” He’s turned his attention to the other members of his party, slinging an arm affectionately around their necks.
“Forgive me for my crude language, but if I had to eat another burger I would implode.” Poo snarks, but does not wiggle out of Ness’s grip. “There’s a lovely place in Dalaam. After we drop Tony off, we can teleport there.”
Drop him off. Like he’s a package they’re transporting.
“Can’t we just teleport? Snow Wood isn’t far from the lab.” Paula asks. She’s playing it cool, but little sparks of lingering energy flicker at his hands. Impatient, maybe.
“Nah. It only works if you remember being there, and last time I checked you or I weren’t anywhere near Snow Wood Boarding School.” Ness refuted.
“That’s a shame. Looks like we’re walking all the way there?” Paula sighs, conjuring up a ball of flames in her hand to keep the cold away.
“Yeah. It’ll be good to stretch our legs a bit longer. Besides, I’ve been dying to try out a new group singalong.” An audible groan from Jeff. Apparently, these started when the two original members of the Chosen Four got trapped in an alien prison and carried on as both a teambuilding exercise and a morale booster. When Tony had asked why he joined in if he disliked singing, Jeff merely gave him a wry smile as if he could never understand why yelling ninety nine bottles of beer on the wall while trundling through the Scarabian deserts was so appealing.
“That’s the spirit. Now, c’mon! It’s a very easy song to pick up. The ants go marching one-by-one hurrah, hurrah. The ants go marching…”
They had reached ants marching by seventeen-by-seventeen when they arrived back at the shore to Lake Tess. Tony was glad. He wasn’t able to come up with anymore words that ended in teen after “sheen”, “queen”, “preen”, and “bean” (and if he was being honest, that last one was pushing it because in the context of the song it was bean as in the plant not been as in the word but no one wanted to come up with anything better, so bean it was). Snow Wood was right across the glittering lake. The only problem was the fact that there was no way to cross.
“Hey, Jeff, how did you get across earlier?” Ness asks, looking around for any boats or bridges that he might have missed.
“Ah. Tessie took me, but…” Jeff gestures to the lake, which is shining, beautiful, and notably Tessie-less.
Paula frowns. “Dang.”
“Well, I think that’s our cue for a little break!” Ness claps his hands together, and three heads turn to him with scary speed. Jeff sits down, leaning on a tree. Tony follows suit. “We’ve been walking for quite a while and need a bit of time to figure out a way to cross. Poo, do we still have that pizza from earlier?”
Poo grimaces. “Yes.”
“Neato! Don’t worry, I got a couple bottles of water for you.” Ness digs around in his bag for a bit before pulling out a couple plastic water bottles and tossing them to everyone.
Poo’s expression is replaced by a smile as he materializes a grease stained pizza box from nowhere. PSI stuff, Jeff mouths to him. Ness takes a half eaten slice while Paula picks at her own full piece. The box is placed at their feet before the rest of the Chosen Four group up a sizable distance away. Tony can’t hear their words clearly.
“I know it looks bad, but it’s better than some of the other things we’ve had.” Jeff says, pulling out a measly sliver of a pizza slice. “Besides, I’m sure Snow Wood has some food from the cafeteria you could get.”
“Yeah.” Tony sits cross-cross, trying not to approach the elephant in the room right off the bat. “Having fun?”
“If I’m being honest? Not really. Saving the world’s a lot different than all the books or movies. There’s a lot more bruises and heat exhaustion than you’d think and the toughest battles are usually not that bad on their own. It’s more like a bunch of little things build up overtime and the next thing you know two of you are unconscious, one of you is poisoned, and the last one standing is flat out of PSI and the Giant Plague Ray Of Doom is about to make you into it’s next snack. That was a nasty one.” Jeff finished his recount by devouring what remained of his pizza sliver.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. You didn’t know.”
“I could have.” You could have stayed, Tony does not say.
“Listen, I’m very sorry I haven’t kept in touch, but there were more important things happening! Paula’s half dead by the end of every day and there’s only so much Ness and Pop can do against PSI-resistant enemies. Half my time is spent making weapons and the other half is spent fighting with them. When downtime comes it’s rare and I can’t spend the few minutes I have not battling aliens or cars or evil mushrooms and I know it sounds so incredible idiotic but I feel like I’m falling apart, Tony. I’m falling apart and if I make it back to Snow Wood alive I will not be the same man who became your friend all those years ago and I need to tell you this in case I die for real.” Jeff takes a deep, shuddering breath. “I love you, Tony, and I’m so so sorry I can’t love you like a normal person. I’m sorry you had to find out after being kidnapped by Starmen because you were someone important to me. I’m sorry I might die in the past to kill a deep and primal evil after telling you this. I’m sorry we can’t just be normal teenage boys with normal teenage boy problems because of the prophecy. I’m sorry I won’t stay behind. I need to do this and I wish I didn’t. If this sullies your opinion of me, then that’s alright. I probably won’t be around to see it and I can’t blame you if you’re disgusted. I just needed to tell you this before I left, possibly for good.”
Snowflakes drift from the clouds above, framing Jeff’s slightly desperate face and all Tony can do in the moment is reach forwards and cup it in his hands. “I love you too. I can’t believe you feel the same, honestly, but I loved the Jeff back in Snow Wood and I love the Jeff that’s in front of me now and I’ll love the one that comes back to me however many days from now and goddammit you better come back to me, alright? Or else I’ll walk to the edge of the universe or time travel or anything inbetween to come and get you. Some big, stupid evil thing that hasn’t even shown it’s face isn’t going to kill you. I won’t let it.”
“Gee, I’ll make sure to tell Giygas that.” Jeff sniffs out, tears causing his glasses to fog up as he pulls out of the hug to look at him properly. “So, uh, does this mean we kiss now?”
“You keep talking about how you’ve changed, but you’re the same dork underneath all that.”
“Is that a yes?”
“Yeah.” Tony pulls him forwards and with a bit of giddiness spurring him on, pecks Jeff on the lips. It isn’t a long kiss, or a good one. It’s clumsy and awkward and it’s just right and afterwards Tony sits beside him and leans his head on Jeff’s shoulder. They stay there for an unknown amount of time until a call reaches them.
“Hey, Jeff! Is that Tessie?” Ness yells, pointing to a massive shadow starting to loom up and out of the water.
“Yes, that’s her!” He yells back, helping Tony to his feet. “You’re going to love riding Tessie. I think it was one of the coolest moments of my life.”
They manage to rejoin the rest of the group in time to see Tessie’s magnificent head burst through the water, bowing it’s neck down so they can clamber onto it’s head. Once everyone’s atop her, she swims leisurely to the other side.
“I’m gonna miss you even more, you know that?” Tony says, climbing off her neck once they’ve reached dry land. Jeff stays on top.
“Me too. I’ll try my hardest to call you more. Maybe you can yell at me enough to make me sleep at a reasonable time.”
“When you come back, Jeff, I’d love to pretend to be normal teenagers with you.”
“Of course.”