Work Text:
We’re the kids who are dead inside
But we’re the ones who feel alive
We dream ‘cause we don’t sleep
We’ll never get rest but we got this
-Cheapshots & Setbacks by As It Is
Pete was at home with Bronx,Saint, and Meagan when he got the call. He heard his phone go off and excused himself from the room to answer. “Hey,Andy” Pete said when he answered the phone “How was the party last night?”
“The party?” he heard Andy say. He seemed confused for some reason. “We didn’t end up going”
“Why not?” Pete asked, confused.
“That’s what I need to tell you.Joe...Joe’s…”. Andy’s voice became quieter and quieter as it wavered slightly.
“What’s wrong,Andy? What happened?”. Pete wondered what could make Andy start acting this way. He was a tough guy, he could cope with almost any problem. When Andy didn’t respond, Pete continued to push on “Andy, tell me. What happened?”
“Joe...Joe’s dead” Andy whimpered. The words sounded insane, impossible, untrue. But Pete could tell from the tone of Andy’s voice that it was the truth.
“What? How?!” Pete asked loudly. His mouth was beginning to move without him even thinking about it. His mind became a huge blur as he tried to process what Andy had just said to him.
“I don’t want to talk about it” Andy responded “I just want you to know that he’s dead and I can’t go on. I can’t cope with seeing what I saw. I’m sorry. Also, let Patrick know what I’ve just said”
After taking a moment to process the words, something clicked in Pete’s brain. He could tell that Andy was about to do something ridiculous. Pete was once again at a loss for words.
“Andy, you’re not going to…” Pete said, unsure of what to say.
“Yes”
“Please don’t” Pete begged “We can get through this”
“You can. I can’t. I’m sorry,Pete”. Before Pete had a chance to respond, the line fell silent.
Pete rushed through the living room. Just before he reached the front door, Meagan stepped in front of him. “Where are you going?” she asked.
“I need to get to Andy’s. It’s an emergency. I’ll tell you more later” he said, moving around her. He sprinted to the car and climbed in as quick as he could. As he set off,he pulled out his phone and called Patrick.
“Hey,Pete” Patrick said calmly when he answered “What’s up?”
“Are you anywhere near Andy’s house?” Pete asked, frantic.
“No, why?”
“I think he’s going to try and kill himself”
“What?!” Patrick exclaimed “I’ll get there as quick as I can”
"
Thank you”. Pete hung up and drove as quick as he could to Andy’s. He took every shortcut he knew and drove as fast as he could, often going over speed limits. All that he cared about at that moment was his friend. When he arrived, he saw Patrick’s car pulling up. The pair rushed to the front door and used all the force they had to knock it down.
They both ran upstairs and split up. Pete went into the bathroom, while Patrick went into Andy’s bedroom. His heart stopped when he saw it. It couldn’t be real. This had to be a dream. This couldn’t actually be happening. Tears filled Patrick’s eyes as he choked out a sob. “P-Pete” he quivered “I found him”. He slowly approached the body that he saw on the floor. He saw the gun, the body, and the blood. He pressed his hand to Andy’s neck, desperately trying to find a pulse. He moved his hand around to so many spots, hoping to find a sign that Andy was alive.
“Please don’t,Andy” he said, shaking “Please, no. You can’t be. Andy!”
He heard footsteps then felt a gentle hand on his shoulder. He saw Pete stood there, eyes red and lip quivering. “We were too late” Patrick sobbed “We could have helped him, but we were too late”. He let the tears stream down his face like a waterfall. Pete wrapped an arm around Patrick and pulled him in tight. Pete began crying too, as he stared at his other friend’s lifeless body.
“Why?” Patrick asked “W-Why did he do this? He always seemed so happy”
“Something happened last night” Pete told him, his mind struggling to pull words together “He saw something he didn’t want to see”
“What? What happened? How do you know?”
“He called me. And...And Joe…” he said. He then broke down in a fit of sobs. Patrick had never seen Pete so feeble and weak.
“What happened?”
“Joe’s dead” Pete said. Suddenly, his sobbing stopped and his eyes looked dead.
Patrick fell silent for a moment before saying “Joe too?”. Pete just silently nodded.Patrick’s sobbing grew heavier and louder.
Patrick looked up by the window and saw a picture. It was himself, Pete, Joe, and Andy at the start of 2013. They all seemed so happy. They were so happy. It was supposed to stay that way. They were supposed to continue making music and laughing and singing and having the time of their lives. It was never supposed to end this way. Memories came flooding into Patrick’s head. He thought of so many things: their first album;their latest show;the first time they recorded after the hiatus;the time they won a VMA. So many memories that they were supposed to be able to look back on together when they were all older.
Pete took Andy’s drumsticks off of a nearby shelf and began twirling them in his hands. Andy was an amazing drummer. Not only was he an amazing drummer, he was an amazing person. He was the glue that held Fall Out Boy together in the toughest times.
And then there was Joe. The silly little joker. He was an incredible guitarist. He was also such a funny person. Whenever someone was down, he could always make them laugh and he’d cheer them up in an instant. It wasn’t fair that both his and Andy’s beautiful personalities had to be taken away from them.
“We...we should call the police” Patrick stammered.
Pete nodded and pulled out his phone. He dialled 911 and placed the phone to his ear.
“Hello? 911? Yes, I’d like to report a suicide”
It hurts and they like that
They fight fire with cheapshots and setbacks
They take cloudless thoughts and pristine hearts for granted.
-
Cheapshots & Setbacks by As It Is