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It was getting odd with how much the enemy Scout has been targeting him, rushing and going to great length just to find the RED Sniper in his own little nest away from the rest of the never-ending battles, well, almost never-ending. It started with once every one or two days, but recently it had become more and more consistent.
Sniper wasn’t exactly sure why would the fast runner was putting so much effort into trying to get him. Heck! Sniper didn’t even expect the BLU Scout to find him! After all, most of his time in the battle are spent hiding in an obscure yet auspicious spot, he never thought someone like Scout will be aware of his location.
Even then, he still can’t figure out why the Scout had been targeting him specifically, it wasn’t that the Boston boy was trying to get revenge, it was rare for Sniper to even hit him, with how quick he can run, let alone killing him. And it wasn’t as if the BLU team specifically sending him to pick off the treat that is RED Sniper himself, no, that’s the BLU Sniper’s and Spy’s jobs.
And it wasn’t until then that he realized how lonely he was out here. Even when the only few times where someone was able to find him, it was the BLU Spy putting a bullet in his head, hah how ironic, or to plant a knife in his back.
Though he had to admit that part of the reason for the loneliness of his had felt like it had been amplified by the sudden change in his relati- wait no, arrangement with the RED Spy, the frenchman had been deliberately avoiding the camper for no explanation. Usually Sniper wouldn’t care much, he knew about people needing their own space, but after seeing the fact that the Spy refuse to cross paths with him for a healthpack during battle even as the nasty gunshot wound soaked his suit a deep blood red, he knew something was wrong, and he still didn’t have an answer to it.
Their arrangement isn’t exactly unconventional, but neither of them felt comfortable with bringing it up in general, and to be completely honest, Sniper himself doesn’t even know what exactly the relationship between them is. Are they colleagues-with-benefits, simple transactions of sexual pleasures? Are they friends who occasionally fuck one another into the mattress? Or are they something more? Sniper doesn’t dare to question out loud.
And Spy’s nature of hiding away parts of himself, even if involuntary, didn’t help either. It’s not like Sniper can bring himself to hate him for it. It wasn’t surprising, really, the rouge is an enigma. But he’d love it if the man opens up about his emotions more, still. That’ll make the unnecessary feelings, or well, everything easier.
Though the Australian couldn’t say that it wasn’t somewhat nice to have someone to visit him while he’s on duty, albeit the intention of the Scout is rather hostile. And he isn’t necessarily opposed to the bickering that just slip out of them as they defend themselves from each other’s attacks. Really, the BLU Scout can be quite clever with it.
But something, somewhere deep inside Sniper’s mind, is telling him that there is something more to the somewhat rivalry relationship between them. It felt almost silly, as if the rivalry is just like boys tugging at girls’ ponytail because they have a crush on them.
Yes, it was childish, but it was also something that Sniper needed, for him to feel a small spark of something after being consumed by the monotony of being stuck in something that might as well be a time loop. Spy was good at being that specific type of distraction but now that he’s ignoring him, it’s time for him to shift onto something or someone else.
It is a secret that he will take to his grave, something that has never been pried out of the deepest part of his mind, his desire for the BLU Scout, dated all the way back, before Spy’s sudden coldness, fuck, even before their arrangement. Scout has been the only thing close to a variable in this new life of his, the only person who have peaked his interest. Well, before Spy entered his life.
When faced with an unreachable target, one can only settle for less, something realistic and be content with it, right? Then why did he felt the need to beat himself up for not pursuing the enemy Scout? He should be content with Spy, now that mutual trust had been established, that Spy is willing to take his mask off around him, but with their current situation…
The feeling of having the loneliness creeping back in was terrifying, he thought he was well over that, the monotony that would’ve killed him was back in the picture. But maybe he could fo something about it, to indulge in a bit of play-pretend. The RED Spy being the BLU Scout’s father was barely a secret, he was only mere steps away from what he originally wanted. It’s not hard to imagine Scout in place of Spy, surely it couldn’t do any harm.
At first, it started of strange, the good kind, seeing Spy from a new perspective, one that can easily be twisted to fit the narrative Sniper wanted. The new approach surprised the rogue but he didn’t complain, instead the weird invisible gap between them that had been there for almost a month was now gone. Things were great, until it wasn’t.
Suddenly, it felt viscerally wrong to gaze into Spy’s eyes and see Scout’s eyes gazing back. It made him sick, thinking about Scout when they have sex, or worse, when they’re making love. The guilt was eating him alive, he really did love Spy, and Spy did too, yet he was using the earned trust to fulfill a selfish desire.
But a depraved part of himself feed on those emotions, a lump of ugliness that he couldn’t stop, and it’s getting hard to ignore…
Maybe one day he will finally make the first move, or he will remain a coward until the day he dies. He doesn’t want to know if there was a correct answer.