Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Edwin was staring at his desk when Charles came home from Crystal’s new flat. That in of itself wasn’t too unusual. Edwin, when left to his own devices, would usually turn to reading or try to get ahead on the miles of paperwork that came with being official Afterlife-approved detectives. But Edwin wasn’t reading or writing, he was just staring blankly at a piece of paper on the desk with his hands folded. 

“You alright there mate?” Charles asked, perching himself at his usual spot on the corner of the desk.

Edwin startled, “Charles! I’m sorry I didn’t hear you return. How’s Crystal?”

“Settling in nicely,” Charles said. She got a new apartment a little closer to the agency and a little more fitting to the “New Crystal” rather than the “Old Crystal”. She was still a working member of the agency, but dedicated most of her time to sorting out her personal life now that her memory was intact. Charles had been spending a lot of time helping her settle in. Edwin would too, but his knowledge of the modern era was lacking enough that most of his advice was a couple decades out of date.

“Whatcha got there?” Charles asked, leaning to see the paper that captivated his friend so thoroughly.

“My asylum request,” Edwin said quietly, “It was approved.”

“What?” Charles exclaimed, snatching up the piece of paper. The Night Nurse said it would take months to be processed, they only sent it a few weeks ago. Well, Charles had been the one to send it, and write most of it. Edwin hadn’t been giving himself enough credit in the form and Charles wasn’t going to let his best mate accidentally self sabotage something like this. They weren’t expecting a response until the winter at least, maybe the Night Nurse pulled some strings to speed things along. Charles was pretty sure she was developing a little soft spot for them, even if she’d probably have damned him to Hell for accusing her of such things.

Charles scanned the paper, it was the same form they sent to The Lost and Found, only with a giant green APPROVED stamped on the front page. Edwin, who was still staring at the desk, handed him a smaller slip of paper, “This came with it,” he whispered. 

The slip of paper was worded with too much jargon but Charles puzzled out that Edwin’s request had been approved and his soul was no longer in Hell’s possession. He was now eligible for a personal afterlife and could contact the Afterlife to begin the process.

“Edwin!” Charles exclaimed, shaking his shoulders, “This is brills!”

Edwin only nodded in agreement, eyes still blank with disbelief.

“Hey,” Charles said, pulling Edwin out of his chair to look at him, “You earned this, I told you they’d approve it.”

“Yes,” Edwin said fondly, “You did.”

Charles put his hands on Edwin’s shoulders, “You know what this means, right mate. No more hiding from Hell.”

“Yes, I know Charles.” He laughed quietly and breathlessly, “I supposed I just don’t know what to do with myself now.”

“Now, we celebrate!” Charles said, wrapping his arms tightly around Edwin. Charles never thought they’d get here. For one, he didn’t know you could request asylum out of Hell until very recently. Charles assumed their eternity would always include running from Death and hiding from Hell. Now, they had to do neither. Charles tightened the hug further. Edwin was never going back to that place again, Charles would never have to stage another rescue mission.

Edwin returned the hug easily, “It hardly feels real.”

“I know mate,” he pulled away just enough to look in Edwin’s eyes, “But it is.”

Edwin nodded and pulled Charles back into the hug. They stayed like that for more than a few moments before Edwin broke away. 

“We have to tell Crystal,” Charles said.

“It’s late Charles. We can’t tell her in the morning.”

“It’s not that late! Come on,” he tugged Edwin towards the mirror. 

Crystal nearly shrieked when they popped out of her standing mirror. Then started going off on them about privacy and timing and ground rules. Edwin didn’t look like he was going to interpret anytime soon outside of argumentative quips- and knowing them, this could go on for hours- so Charles took it upon himself to share the news.

“Crystal, Edwin got approved,” he said loudly to be heard over her rant.

“Appr- wait, the asylum thing? Are you serious? But it’s only been, like, three weeks!” She gasped.

“Yes, they were surprisingly efficient,” Edwin said calmly.

Crystal hit Edwin’s arm, “Dude! That’s amazing!” 

She trapped him in a hug and Edwin forced a grimace, “Again, a handshake is more than suitable.”

Charles laughed gleefully and hugged Edwin too. It was half to spite him, half because Charles was so damn happy. He hadn’t realized how much stress the waiting put on him until it had all evaporated.

Crystal pulled away, “Well? How’s it feel to be a free man, huh?”

“About the same, if I am being honest,” Edwin said wistfully.

Crystal nodded, “Just wait for the news to set in.” She stepped back and clapped her hands together. “And I am really really happy for you but I have a meeting with my school counselor in the morning and need to sleep. I’ll see you guys tomorrow night though and we can throw a party.”

Edwin grimaced sincerely this time, “What if we didn’t?”

They laughed and said goodbye. Charles apologized for intruding so late. In his defense, it was an important announcement. Also having not slept in over thirty years he’s lost sight of what’s considered an appropriate time to drop in.

They did not subject Edwin to the horrors of having a party thrown, but they did have an enjoyable evening of board games. 

It was late into the night, around the time Crystal would usually be heading home, when Edwin got quiet again. He was holding the papers from the request in his hand, reading them over and over. 

“Hey mate,” Charles said gently, brushing their shoulders together, “Are you okay?”

Edwin nodded, “I have an Afterlife,” he said disbelievingly. “My actual Afterlife. I’m just wondering what it’s like.”

“It’s probably a big library,” Crystal said, “For all your nerd stuff.”

Edwin shot her a look, “My so-called nerd stuff has saved your life on more than one occasion, I’ll have you know.”

They launched into bickering almost immediately. At first, when they finally started getting along, Charles had foolishly thought the bickering would stop. If anything, it’s gotten worse. Usually Charles would listen in and enjoy the self contained chaos of their arguments, but not tonight. He suddenly can’t focus on their words, they are too muffled to hear over the ringing in his ears. Something wraps around Charles' chest and squeezes the air out of him. Something dark and looming.

Charles had an Afterlife of his own, one he never thought about much. They’re wasn’t a need to think about it. That night Charles decided to stay on Earth with Edwin and has never looked back. In the beginning, Edwin tried to push Charles to move on, had insisted on it. He thought Charles deserved peace and tranquility, that staying on Earth would lead to his doom. 

Charles had disagreed. He thought Earth was wonderful enough. Here, there was music and people and adventure. The stuff he didn’t get to enjoy for long enough while alive. Earth also had Edwin, who had quickly became the best friend he’d ever had. Charles was always sure he’d made the right choice to stay. There was no one else he’d rather be dead with, no other Afterlife that could top this.

He always assumed Edwin felt the same. Through the running from Death, the promises to never split up, he always assumed Edwin would never want anything else either.

But Edwin never had a choice in the matter, did he? Not a real one anyway. For Edwin, it was either Earth or Hell. That’s not much of a choice. Charles had always known this, obviously. Edwin getting dragged back down to Hell was one of his worst fears- worst fears turned reality too. But Charles never considered what Edwin would do if he was actually given a choice.

The obvious pick was to stay, right? Only at this moment Charles wasn’t sure. Edwin loved their Afterlife, loved the agency, loved Charles. Was in love with Charles. But Edwin also loved safety, which was few and far between in their line of work. Edwin hated jumping into danger- Charles was the brawn, when they were in danger he faced it head on, but Edwin was the brains, he protected them by making sure there was no danger at all. It didn’t always work, just like how Charles couldn’t stop the Night Nurse from coming back, or that demon from taking Edwin, or Esther’s torture. 

Edwin liked quiet, liked safety. There was little of that here on Earth for them. Here was city noise and banshee screeches and running for your lives from a rouge ghost. Here was an endless pool of dangers Edwin couldn’t prevent and Charles couldn’t protect them from.

Charles realized, at that moment looking at Edwin’s approved asylum request, that Edwin might not stay. Edwin loved him, but that might not be enough to justify staying now that Edwin actually gets a say in the matter.

Charles wanted to throw up. Ghosts can’t get sick, the Edwin in his head says. That makes him want to throw up too, because there might be a future for him where he never hears Edwin’s voice say that again.

“Charles,” Edwin put a hand on his shoulder, “Are you quite alright?”

“I’m aces,” Charles said instinctively. This is a big moment for Edwin- if he wants to leave that’s fine, that’s good, he deserves eternal peace- and Charles doesn’t want to ruin it over his silly feelings. “I’m sure your Afterlife is perfect.”

“As is yours,” Edwin says, “I believe that is the entire purpose of them.” Charles Afterlife was perfect, for right now. It might not be soon, whenever Edwin decides to go.

Crystal left an hour or so later, leaving Charles and Edwin alone in their office. Honestly it’s a little strange to have someone around so often. It’s brills, Charles loves Crystal and he was right about how useful having a psychic would be (take that Edwin). But it makes the office feel so crowded sometimes.

Probably because the office was crowded on a normal day. They have souvenirs and knick-knacks and books and cursed objects piled in every spare space. The office is several decades of memories and adventures backed into a single room plus a closet. They had to nick one of the other empty rooms on their floor to make more storage space in ‘09 because of all the shit they collected. 

Some of this stuff was entertainment- you had a lot of spare time as a ghost- footballs, fencing equipment, bored games, mystery novels. A lot of it was things they picked up on cases. A cursed baseball bat from the States they got as payment for the Case of the Aggravating Athlete in ‘99. A fishbowl enchanted to turn any liquid into salt water from the Case of the Runaway Selkie in ‘07. An authentic bust from Ancient Rome they got from the Macabre Museum case of ‘92.

Charles picked up a vase of carnations. The flowers were still perfectly intact despite getting them in 1994. The vase was enchanted for that purpose, it was payment for helping an elderly ghost find her long lost sister. Charles had insisted on going out and finding flowers to brighten up the office. They took up residence in the building a year prior and it still needed some decorating. The carnations caught his eye in the first florist he went to and they haven’t changed it since. Apparently they meant love and devotion- or something like that, Charles wasn’t too good at the flower language stuff- he thought it was fitting for their office. 

“Finally thinking of changing them?” Edwin asked absently from the desk. He was back to sorting through case paperwork to send back to the Night Nurse.

It was an entirely innocent question, but it made Charles wince. These flowers were for deep love and devotion. They felt fitting back in ‘94, when he and Edwin were officially never splitting up. Edwin had stopped asking him about moving on after they had their first close call with Death. It had been terrifying and that day they vowed to never be separated. A few months later they got a magic vase and Charles overheard a florist talking about love.

Twenty years later, Edwin suggests getting different flowers. Maybe ones that mean hope or peace. Maybe in another twenty years, Edwin will walk back on their promise to stick together. 

“No,” Charles said harsher than he meant to, “I like these ones.”

Charles can hear Edwin set his pen down, “Charles,” he says carefully. “You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

“I know mate,” he said more calmly, turning to look at Edwin, “You can talk to me about anything too.”

It’s their old back and forth. Edwin’s lips are pursed and for a second Charles thought he might push for more. He didn’t though, instead he stood up and walked around the desk to a stack of books.

“Shall I read to you?” he asked, “I picked up an Agatha Christie we haven’t read yet today.” He held up the novel and Charles couldn’t help but smile.

“Yeah, that sounds aces”

They settle into their usual positions on the sofa. With Charles on his back, feet rested in Edwin’s lap while he read. This became a routine of theirs in ‘93, when they first got their sofa. Technically it started before then, before the office. Libraries were a common haunting ground for them before they settled into their Afterlife. Charles was having an embarrassingly off day in late 1989. New Year’s Eve was coming up and that made Charles realize exactly how dead he was. The world would keep spinning without him and he’d never appreciate a new year properly again. He wouldn’t age, grow up, becoming something more than he was. He was always going to be a sixteen year old fuck up. Edwin had switched to reading aloud that night to try and distract Charles, and it was just as effective as the first time. So he started doing it more often. Then they got the office and their sofa and this specific routine. 

Edwin’s steady, elegant voice washed over him as he began to read. It was almost embarrassing how quickly it made Charles relax. He thought Edwin should have been a radio host or something. Charles let the dark looming thing holding onto him go. Edwin’s voice replaced it as it went. 

It worked for most of the night. 

Then the dark looming thing comes back, wraps a single coil around Charles' thoughts and that’s all it takes. If Edwin leaves, he’ll never get to have this again. Never have his voice read to him or hear it in any respect at all. The realization left his stomach tied in knots.

He thought of Edwin in his Afterlife, which undoubtedly would have all the books he could want even with no one to read them too. Maybe Charles could go with him when Edwin leaves. Edwin wouldn’t turn him away, of course not. Edwin loved Charles as much as Charles loved Edwin, he would be delighted to have Charles join him in tranquility.

But Charles doesn’t particularly want endless tranquility. He could listen to Edwin read forever but that is more of a hyperbole. He needs a couple hours of excitement in between these perfect moments or else he’ll lose his mind. He also doesn’t particularly want to leave Earth. Earth with its people and music. Where nothing ever stays the same and Charles can still bask in some of the enjoyments he had in life. 

Would he even be able to follow Edwin? The Night Nurse said each Afterlife was unique to each soul. He doesn’t think Edwin would like his Afterlife, whatever it was, too much. The two of them were too different. Charles usually loved that about them. He loved Edwin’s unique quirks and he loved pretending to annoy him. He loved sharing music with him and he loved listening to Edwin read. Their differences work on Earth but in a pocket universe uniquely tailored to one of them? It would be a nightmare. Nothing like their office, which has both of them blended together. Charles’ sports equipment shoved next to a pile of detective novels. Charles’ stereo placed across the room from Edwin’s victrola so they could each listen to their respective music. Their differences might be so great that the Afterlife wouldn’t let Charles follow Edwin at all.

He makes a mental note to ask the Night Nurse about it later. If not, he will have to get used to the idea of Edwin leaving.

The concept was foreign to him, which was his own fault. Everyone left eventually, that’s how the world worked. That’s how Charles’ world worked because Charles was not a particularly easy person to be around for long but he was easy to get sick of. He tried his best to be cheery and friendly but sometimes things slipped through the cracks. Like in Port Townsend with the Devlins, or with the Night Nurse, or with those asshole jocks. He has had more slip ups lately than he’d care to admit. Enough that Edwin now knew what he was really like. A well placed smile or deflection wasn’t enough for Edwin anymore when he asked how Charles was doing. Even now, Edwin had work to do- that he should be doing- instead he was reading aloud because Charles freaked out over some flowers.

There was no way Charles was enough to make Edwin stay. He was only Charles Rowland. There was nothing else that kept Edwin tied here except for the agency. Edwin did not miss being alive, not like Charles did. There was nothing here his Afterlife couldn’t give him except for the agency and Charles.

The agency will lose its luster for Edwin eventually. He’ll get tired or they’ll have another dangerous close call like with Esther that will make Edwin realize it’s not worth it. Then it would just be Charles holding him back, which is about as effective as tying a feather to a balloon in order to keep it in place.

It’s not that Edwin would stop loving Charles. He wouldn’t dare suggest that, he knows Edwin would take offense. Because Edwin does love Charles, he’s been more open about it lately. Charles was a little worried rejecting Edwin would cut Edwin deeply and sour their friendship. It hasn’t done that at all, Edwin has seemed lighter in these past few months than ever before. So yeah, Edwin loved Charles but he wasn’t stupid enough to think that would keep him here. His mum had loved Charles also, but that wasn’t enough to get her to leave his dad or stick up for him. Some of his old school mates had loved Charles, but that wasn’t enough to get them to stop the rest of their mates murdering him. Edwin loved Charles but that won’t be enough to keep him from his Afterlife.

Everyone always left for their own thing, that’s the way the world worked. His parents moved on from their son’s death within a few years. They shipped him off to boarding school a few years before that because Charles living at home was too much. His schoolmates that were usually decent enough guys watched Charles get stoned to death in a lake, then left for bed while he died in an attic. Crystal hadn’t left quite yet. They had called off their fling- Crystal had to sort through her personal life and the logistics of a ghost and living girl in a relationship were not great- Charles had agreed, but the sort of rejection still stung. They remained friends, which was honestly better, but Charles knew it was a temporary thing. Crystal will grow up and live a full life, decades in the future she will pass and Charles doubted she would stick around Earth like Charles did. One day Crystal would leave too. Now, so would Edwin. Then, Charles would have to figure this out on his own. He hoped he could figure out how to one-man the agency, so he could at least hold on to this. 

Edwin’s hand brushed his ankle. His fingers settled around him slowly and began brushing soothing circles. “Not enjoying?” he asked, “I’ll admit, it started out nicely but drags in the middle. Would you rather something else?” 

Charles hated that Edwin was still picking up on his mood, “Nah, keep going.” Edwin hummed and did just that. 

They finished the book by the time the sun started peeking out over the horizon. Charles couldn’t really tell you how it ended. Edwin was saying something about it though, it was mostly gibberish to him since he stopped paying attention in favor of his own twisted thoughts. He still tried to listen though. Edwin loved mystery stories and he loved to talk about them. Charles, in turn, loved to listen.

He loved Edwin a lot-a lot, he was realizing. 

He sat up and crawled over to Edwin’s side of the couch. He then slumped back down on top of Edwin, burying his face in his neck. Edwin tensed in surprise, but relaxed quickly. He brought an arm around Charles’ back.

“Are you quite sure you don’t want to talk about what’s bothering you?”

Charles shifted his head and forced a smile, “I’m alright mate, seriously.”

Edwin sighed ever so slightly, “Alright, but it’s okay if you aren’t.”

Charles buried his face into Edwin’s neck again. They sat like that in silence for a while. 

“Edwin?” Charles finally said.

“Hm?”

“You know that I love you, right?” 

“Of course,” Edwin said, rubbing Charles’ back a little. “I love you too. You know that, right?”

Charles smiled, “Yeah, I do.” Charles just wished that could be enough.

The next day, Charles barged into the place the Night Nurse turned into her own office. 

She shrieked slightly and nearly knocked over her comically large stack of papers. 

“Ack! Charles Rowland, what have we said about knocking?”

“Sorry Charlie-“

“Do not call me that.”

“I just had some questions for you, about the Afterlife.”

That made the Night Nurse pause, she raised an eyebrow at him, “Finally decided to go where you belong, have we?”

“No,” Charles said immediately. He decided the opposite in fact. He wanted to know if he could join Edwin in the Afterlife, even if it wasn’t his Afterlife. “Can multiple people have the same Afterlife?” he asked.

The Night Nurse paused, “I am not sure, it’s not my job to make the contents of the Afterlife. Each one is unique to each soul.”

“I know that part,” Charles said, “But let’s say my Afterlife isn’t right for me unless Edwin’s there… Would we be able to stay together?” He asked hopefully.

Charlie sighs and smooths out her pantsuit, “I should have known this was about your friend,” she said, “It always is.”

“Is not!” Charles protested.

“Yes it is, he is just the same if not worse!” she huffed. “And now I am chaperoning you two for eternity.”

“Well,” Charles said, “If we can go to the same Afterlife it may become a temporary position.”

The Night Nurse raised her eyebrow, “I suppose,” she admitted, “But I do not know if it is possible.”

“Can you find out?” Charles asked.

“No!” she wailed, “Do you have any idea how much paperwork you boys cause me? I don’t have the time!”

“It’s not so bad with Edwin helping you. He’s aces at this stuff.”

That made the Night Nurse hesitate again, “Yes,” she agreed, “the boy is surprisingly efficient. I suppose if I request he handle some of this…”

“Come on Charlie, please?” he pleaded with the most pitiful, sympathy-inducing puppy dog eyes he could muster. If he’s gotten good at one thing since being dead, it was doing that. Mostly because he quickly figured out how quickly they made Edwin cave.

“Alright, fine!” They seemed to work on the Night Nurse too, Charles duly noted. “But!” the Night Nurse adds, “You must wait patiently, no barging in here every hour asking for an answer like you did for Edwin's asylum request!”

“I got it!” Charles said, putting a hand on his heart, “I swear to not bother you about it.”

“And! You must stop calling me Charlie,” she finished.

“Alright..  Charlotte then?”

The Night Nurse gritted her teeth, “No.”

“Lottie?” 

She hesitated, “No! Enough with this name nonsense!”

“Got it Lottie, thank you for your help!” Charles called as he left the room.

Charles felt a touch better after talking to the Night Nurse. There was a chance he and Edwin could stay together even if Edwin was done on Earth. He decided to push the Edwin-leaving thoughts out of his mind. Mostly because if he didn’t he’s hit with how much he really wanted to stay on Earth but there was no perfect Earthly Afterlife without Edwin.

This whole thing sucked exponentially. Which was shitty because this whole thing was also supposed to be a good thing. Edwin was free from Hell, free to do whatever he wanted without fear. Yet, here was good old Charles being miserable about because what? His best friend in the history of his existence might find happiness away from Charles? Real mature. 

Solving cases started to lose its shine. With each one solved, dread would pool in his stomach because what if that was their last one together? What if this was it?

Crystal and Edwin noticed how withdrawn he was. Nothing he seemed to say or do could get them off his back. Not that he could blame them for harping on his behavior. It was starting to bleed into their case work. He wasn’t as fast on his feet, as friendly with clients, as aware of danger. 

His dad probably would have lost his mind on him if Charles had been acting this way when alive. Would have lost even more when he found out why. That it was because he was feeling a little down about his friend leaving. Then he would have scoffed and said something about how he shouldn’t have expected so much from a son like Charles. 

His friends weren’t like that though. They were patient- usually, neither of them were above drilling into Charles when he did something especially dangerous or stupid. They were mostly concerned. A flurry of are you okay you know you can talk to me it’s not good to keep things bottled up it’s not helping anything. 

Then Edwin started acting really really weird.

It started after they finished a particularly long and draining case. Edwin came back from visiting the Night Nurse with a new stack of paperwork. 

“The Night Nurse said she needed my assistance with these while she’s tied up on another… project.” Edwin announced as he returned.

Shit, Charles forgot he saddled Edwin with extra work. At least he knew the Night Nurse was keeping her promise.

“I can help you,” Charles offered. Usually Edwin handled this side of the job, he had a better eye for it and also got some weird enjoyment out of organizing their cases. Charles would sometimes help fill in details but Edwin did the brunt of it. Still, it wasn’t unusual for Charles to lend a hand when they were particularly swamped.

So it wasn’t surprising when Edwin opened his mouth to accept. But then he shut it abruptly and set the paper on the desk. “I can manage fine on my own.” he said stiffly. 

That was weird. Edwin didn’t bemoan paperwork like Charles did, but he was not above complaining about it when there was too much. “Come on mate, my handwriting isn’t that bad,” he tried joking. 

Edwin shook his head. “It is legible, yes. But I can handle this,” he insisted. “Besides, it’s Saturday, don’t you have plans with Crystal tonight?” 

Charles blinked, he did usually hang out with Crystal Saturday night. But he also could see her Sunday afternoon, or Tuesday night, or on Friday when she came by the agency, “Yeah, but we can reschedule if you need help.”

“I am perfectly fine,” he said firmly, “Go enjoy your night.” 

So Charles didn’t push it. He forgot about the incident quickly enough, until more weird things started piling up.

Edwin stopped scolding him when Charles did something particularly stupid on a case. He hardly said a word. Not when Charles got himself slashed with iron while guarding a client. Not when he jumped a train chasing a rogue ghost and almost got pulled under the iron rails. Not when Charles accidently smashed their getaway mirror. Instead, Edwin would fume silently, tell him to be more careful, then move on.

Edwin stopped bickering with Crystal so much, at least not around Charles. Crystal would try to provoke him like poking a stick at a wasp nest, but Edwin wouldn’t take the  bait. Charles could tell that it kind of stung for Crystal. They were getting along better and their endless petty arguments had become “their thing” so to speak. But Edwin’s snippy quips at Crystal dropped significantly.

In all honesty, the thing that got to Charles the most was that stupid cursed painting. It was an original oil painting of a coastal city, not that you could really tell because the thing was that damn ugly. It was also cursed to drive people temporarily insane if you looked at it too long. Charles was never convinced it was actually cursed, he thinks it’s more likely it made people go mental just because it was so furiously ugly. They got it off of a client in 2011 and for some bloody reason Edwin loved it. They weren’t affected by the curse as ghosts, so that wasn’t an issue. What was an issue was Edwin insisted on hanging in the office where Charles was forced to look at it everyday. For the last decade Charles has pleaded with Edwin to get rid of the damn thing. Even tried hiding it in his bag of tricks backpack. It always ended up back on the wall though and in 2019 Edwin spelled it so only he could take it down. Charles had given up his quest to get rid of it, but they still joked about it from time to time.

He almost didn’t notice the painting was gone. When he did, it felt like the flowers again. Under ordinary circumstances, Charles would have celebrated the painting's loss. He hollered with glee at his victory in the Painting Debacle of 2011. But he was already noticing how weird Edwin’s been acting, so the missing painting left a sour taste in his mouth.

He pointed it out to Edwin, who waved him off. “I simply have come to see your point. The painting is… an acquired taste.” Edwin had picked his words carefully and very pointedly did not look at the empty space were the painting used to be.

Charles spent the rest of the evening digging around their space to find the painting. It was tucked very carefully in the back of the extra storage room they had. When Edwin went out, he hung the gaudy thing back up.

That incident made Charles conclude something was seriously the matter with Edwin. He was not acting like himself and it was making Charles worried.

His biggest fear was that this was the Worst Case scenario. That Edwin was getting ready to move on from Earth, and by extension Charles and the agency. He wasn’t as present as he was before- more withdrawn and reserved. He was acting like he did back in ‘89, before he and Charles became close. Edwin would bite back his sarcastic remarks and try not to get angry with Charles then. But it’s been nearly forty years of friendship, there was no reason for Edwin to be holding back now. Unless he was mentally preparing himself to leave. Getting the office better suited for one detective rather than two. 

Charles decided to go to Crystal about it. Crystal was pretty good at advice even if it was usually just whacking Charles upside the head verbally.

“I’m worried about Edwin,” he said one night while hanging out in her flat. Her new place had come together nicely and it was more spacious than the office. So they would hang out here a lot nowadays. “He’s been acting strange,” Charles added.

Crystal looked up from her laptop, “Yeah, I noticed that. Has he said anything to you?”

Charles shook his head. He tried asking about it once, but Edwin brushed him off far too easily. “Do you think he’s leaving soon?” Charles asked quietly.

Crystal stopped whatever she was typing, “Huh?” she asked. “Leaving for what?”

“You know, the Afterlife. He’s not tied to Hell anymore. That’s the whole reason he stayed here.” Charles said, waving his hands around.

Crystal raised her eyebrow and clacked her purple nails on the side of the keyboard, “The whole reason?”

Charles looked at her puzzled, “Yes?”

“Mhm, I don’t know if you’ve noticed but he also likes you a whole lot.”

“What? Oh yeah I know that,” Charles said. “I just meant Edwin likes when things are quiet and peaceful. Not a whole lot of that on Earth, less in Hell. So he would probably want to move on at some point.”

Crystal considered that for a moment. “Yeah, you could be right I guess. But it’s still Edwin, I don’t think he’d just up and leave like that”

Charles shrugged, it made enough sense in his head. 

“You should just talk to him,” Crystal added.

Charles promised he would before he left that night.

He didn’t end up talking to Edwin. He was planning to, promise. It’s just that Charles always made a big show of being brave, being the brawn. In reality he was bloody terrified of what Edwin would say. 

Especially after the Night Nurse got back to him. The long and short of it was this: humans and spirits don’t get to know about the Afterlives before going. No ifs, thens, or buts. 

So Charles was back to square one. Edwin was leaving, Charles may or may not be able to follow, Charles still preferred what they have on Earth to whatever the Afterlife is offering.

Edwin was still acting weird too. Weirder even. He seemed more nervous and agitated but was still very withdrawn. 

It reached a boiling point one early morning. The sun wasn’t out yet, they had no case to work on, and Edwin was tenser than ever.

“Charles,” Edwin said rather loudly, “I must speak with you. It is important,” his voice was tight and uncertain.

Charles perked up instantly, “Yeah? Is everything okay?” Oh god he hoped this wasn’t the conversation he thought it was. This was all too real now.

Edwin cleared his throat and pressed his fists together. He tried to start talking but then switched his approach a couple of times. It was unlike him, Edwin was usually very put together and planned out his serious conversations. That meant this had to be bad.

“Charles,” he eventually said, “Do you wish to move on to your Afterlife?” he asked very quietly.

Charles drew back in shock, “What? No!” he scrambled over to where Edwin was sitting, “Wh- Why do you think that?” 

“You haven’t been yourself, you’re withdrawn and disinterested in cases,” the words spilled out of Edwin’s mouth in a flurry, “And You’ve been asking the Night Nurse about the Afterlife! You’ve never shown any interest in it before!” Edwin exclaimed.

Charles blinked, “I wouldn’t leave you.”

Edwin looked down and pressed his fists together tighter, “I would not fault you,” Edwin said softly. “It would be long overdue. I know you were not ready before and felt an… obligation-“

“Obligation! To what?” Charles fought to keep his voice down but nothing Edwin was saying made any sense to him. 

Edwin took a deep inhale and exhaled, “You are an exceedingly good person Charles. I know you feel it is your job to protect your friends and that my… predicament with Hell weighed on you-“

“No,” Charles interrupted, “No, what are you talking about mate?” Charles looked around, unsure of what he was looking for. Maybe a reason for how this all got so tangled. “I want to stay here with you, no matter what.” He squeezed Edwin’s shoulder, who put his hand over Charles’. “I’m sorry I’ve been distant. I’ve been- well I’ve been worrying about you leaving.”

Edwin turned to look at him and blinked, “Where am I going?” he asked.

Charles couldn’t stop the nervous laugh from bubbling out of his lips, “The Afterlife, mate. You aren’t stuck here anymore.”

Edwin furrowed his brow and Charles could practically see the wheels in his head turn. “Wha- Charles. Surely you know I could never leave you either?”

Charles shrugged, “It’s different, innit? I’m not blaming you for it.”

Edwin is looking at him, face wide with horror. He made a grab for Charles’ hands, “It is most certainly not different. I would not leave you, why do you think that?” he asked, echoing Charles’ words.

“You have an actual Afterlife now, the one you were always supposed to have,” Charles reminded him.

“So do you,” Edwin pointed out, “And you loathed me suggesting you should be there instead of here with me. Do you think I would not stay for you?”

Charles hesitated and Edwin’s face crumbled. 

“Charles Rowland, you are the singularly most important person to me. I am so sorry I ever made you doubt that.”

Charles tugged Edwin closer, “I didn’t doubt that!” he promised, “I just didn’t think… that was enough? I guess. Shit, this isn’t coming out right.”

Edwin carefully readjusted his hands so they were cupped around Charles’, “It is more than enough. I am honored to share my Afterlife with you.”

“Oh,” Charles said. “Oh, so you aren’t leaving?”

“No, and I don’t ever plan to, if that is amicable for you,” Edwin said confidently.

“Yeah that sounds pretty brills to me- wait, why were you acting weird then.” Charles asked

Edwin looked a little guilty, “I thought you were thinking about moving on. And I hoped, rather selfishly, you may stay if I removed some of the…bothersome… aspects of living here.”

“Edwin,” Charles said half scoldingly, “You don’t have to do that mate. Actually don’t do that at all.” He took a deep breath, “I love you and I love what we do. I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me, remember?”

“Yes,” Edwin said fondly, “It seems we’ve both been rather foolish as of late.”

Charles snickered, “Just a touch.” Charles pulled Edwin into the tightest hug he could manage. “I love you.”

Edwin hummed and reciprocated the embrace, “I love you too.”

They stayed like that for much of the early morning. Charles felt the tension in his incorporeal body dissipate. All he could want was right in front of him, and it wasn’t going anywhere. 

Chapter Text

Edwin scarcely believed what he was seeing. He scanned his eyes up and down the pages again and again, but they never changed. It was no Hellish trick or delusion of his own mind.

He was done. He was free of that wretched place with its green tinted walls, endless filth, and haunted giggling. He was never seeing the Dollhouse again. Or any part of Hell for that matter. No more trading or torture. 

The Night Nurse had appeared in the office early into the evening, and handed him his asylum form with a stiff but surprisingly sincere congratulations. She disappeared immediately after, leaving Edwin alone to process.

He never truly considered being free from Hell, truly free and not simply on the run. It had never seemed a possibility and Edwin was not one to dwell on impossibilities. But then months ago, the Night Nurse had handed him an overly complicated form for asylum. Then it was suddenly a very real possibility.

Edwin had shoved the form in his desk the same day. He never once considered he might actually belong in Hell. Not in all those years of running through endless hallways did he consider a punishment for his own sins. It was a technicality, a clerical error. But when he had to stare down that asylum form requesting he profess his innocence, Edwin feared maybe some of it was warranted.

There was a lot wrong with Edwin Payne. He was stubborn and rude and petty. He was cold and unpleasant company. He was also incredibly selfish. He was selfish in his reasoning for opening the Dead Boy Detective Agency. He was selfish in monopolizing Charles Rowland’s time, and selfish for wanting to continue to do so.

So, fearing rejection, he simply opted to not fill out the form. There was no need to, right? They had their deal with the Lost and Found, he was permitted to stay on Earth. Of course that was assuming they remained useful enough, then that deal went up in flames like a particularly sunny level of Hell Edwin once ran through during a botched escape attempt. 

His fears had bubbled over and spilled out three weeks ago. He lamented to Charles and bore his soul to him which should have been ludicrously embarrassing. But it was not because Charles had been patient and kind, because Charles Rowland was not capable of being anything else.

Charles had helped him start the form, then had snatched the pen from his hand because apparently Edwin was being too harsh. Edwin thinks Charles is just biased and has a penchant for storytelling, which is to mean embellishing. They had sent the form on its way, expecting an answer by mid January at the earliest. Edwin had effectively pushed the whole matter from his mind. They had cases to solve after all.

He supposed that’s where much of his shock came from. It’s been three weeks, and the Afterlife had already approved him. How could they have decided so quickly? What did Edwin do to deserve such good fortune? Edwin Payne seldom had good fortune. 

He hadn’t heard Charles come home and nearly jumped from his seat. He hasn’t quite composed himself well enough to be around company, but Charles has never minded his idiosyncrasies.

“Edwin!” Charles shrieked when he saw the form, “This is brills!”

It was, as Charles put it, brills. Objectively, it was objectively true and good. Edwin liked logic and objectivity, but he struggled to wrap his brain around this piece of good fortune. It was contradictory to everything else he had observed of the world. Contrary to what his friends say, Edwin was very capable of admitting he was wrong. The problem he had was figuring out what was right after being disproven.

 Charles pulled Edwin to his feet, “Hey, you earned this. I told you they’d approve it.”

“Yes, you did.” Edwin said, failing to hide the fondness in his voice. Charles had been very reassuring when they sent off the form. Charles flattery probably had something to do with the easy approval of Edwin was honest.

“You know what this means, right mate? No more hiding from Hell,” Charles said. At least his jubilance was befitting the situation, even if Edwin was still catching up.

“Yes, I know Charles. I suppose I just don’t know what to do with myself now.”

There was no Hell, no Death to be running from. He was by all accounts perfectly and wholly safe. But there was still a phantom thrum of adrenaline, the itch to be on the move, to stay on high alert. There was still the instinct to stay quiet and unseen. Seventy years of that was hard to shake, harder still when there was nearly forty years of running after it. 

Charles did not seem to share in Edwin’s lingering anxiety, “Now, we celebrate!” he cheered. He pulled Edwin into a hug that surely would have broken a living person’s rib. Edwin wanted to share in the euphoria but the nagging anxiety that has kept him company for one hundred and seven years would not let him. It was too simple, too clean. It did not feel real to him.

He said as much to Charles who held him tighter, “But it is.”

Charles dragged him to Crystal’s new flat to share the news, even though it was well into the evening and Charles had just returned from there. He supposed Crystal did like to be kept in the loop. The three of them spend a pleasant, workless evening together the following night. That was when it all settled in. 

The notice from the Afterlife confirmed his soul was no longer Hell’s jurisdiction and he was now free to move on to his actual Afterlife. The Night Nurse said they were tailor made paradises for each soul. Edwin never gave his much thought, it served no purpose in Hell or on Earth. Another impossibility.

Maybe his had stars, Edwin missed seeing stars at night. When he was a boy vacationing at his family’s country estate, he would lose hours of sleep watching the night sky. You could hardly see most constellations nowadays even outside the throes of London. Maybe his Afterlife would have stars. Stars and sunrises.

The fantasy felt hollow, but it was all he could conjure. There wasn’t much from his life that could be gained by settling in his Afterlife. Truthfully, he did not mind being dead. Although he could have done without being murdered as a sacrificial lamb. He doubted this supposed paradise would be a reflection of living then. 

It was impossible for it to be a reflection of his current life, although it was the closest to paradise Edwin could muster. He was happiest here, with Charles and their work. Far happier than he was in flesh and blood life. But how could the Afterlife conjure this? At best maybe a cheap intimidation of it all, but Edwin finds the idea repulsive, so he doubted that was it. 

Perhaps the Afterlife has a quality like Dante’s Paradiso, and not something mortals could fully comprehend without having seen it. He hoped that was were the similarities ended though, he always thought Dante failed to make Heaven sound like an appealing place to be in for eternity. 

Edwin is snapped out of his thoughts by Charles leaning on him, “Hey mate, are you okay?”

Edwin cleared his throat, “I have an Afterlife- my actual Afterlife. I am merely wondering what it’s like.”

“It’s probably a big library,” Crystal says, which admittedly does sound appealing. “For all your nerd stuff.”

Edwin glared, “My so-called nerd stuff saved your life on more than one occasion, I'll have you know.” 

“Oh yea, I forgot how life saving your Sherlock Holmes facts are,” She bites back sarcastically.

They bickered for a while, some comments more biting than others. Edwin would never admit it out loud but he rather enjoyed his lighthearted rows with Crystal. 

Usually Charles would have interrupted by now, either to take someone’s side or shuffle the conversation along, but he was noticeably quiet. When Edwin looked over to him, Charles was staring absently. 

Edwin carefully put a hand on his shoulder so as to not frighten him, “Charles, are you quite alright?”

Charles jumped back to reality and said, “I’m aces,” in an instant. But his smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes and his response lacks the glee from mere hours before. “I’m sure your Afterlife is perfect,” he added.

“As is yours,” Edwin reminds him, “I believe that is the entire purpose of them.” A few decades ago, Edwin would have assumed Charles' suddenly sour mood was because he was regretful about staying on Earth. However, Charles had never expressed any interest in moving on, even when Edwin had tried pushing him towards it. Surely,  something else was the matter, though Edwin hadn’t the faintest idea what. Edwin did not push the issue in front of Crystal, who also seemed to notice Charles’ behavior. Edwin did not want to make him feel cornered. Besides, Charles seemed to bounce back to his usual self for the rest of the night. Perhaps it was just a sudden bout of melancholy, Edwin was not above such moments either.

That is until, later in the evening when Charles’ mood soured again. He had been staring rather contemplatively at their enchanted flower vase. Charles had picked out the carnations decades ago to brighten the office and test the enchantment; they haven’t changed them out since at Charles’ insistence. 

“Finally thinking of changing them?” Edwin asked casually. He didn’t mind the consistency of the carnations, he was rather curious to test if the enchantment would keep them alive forever. But they had gotten them around the time they first moved into the office, and much has changed since then. New flowers may be in order in honor of that.

“No, I like these ones,” Charles snapped uncharacteristically.

Edwin looked over to Charles, who faced away from him. His shoulders were tensed and Edwin could tell he had a weirdly protective death grip on the vase. “Charles,” Edwin said, “You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

Charles agreed and turned to Edwin, “You can talk to me about anything too,” he said with another empty smile.

Edwin pursed his lips. He has gotten much better at noticing when Charles was deflecting since Port Townsend, now that he knew to look out for it. He had been careless with their friendship before, by taking Charles’ words at face value. He had never known Charles to lie to him, so he never questioned him either. Edwin is rather ashamed it took a then near stranger to point out Charles’ pain. 

Noticing Charles’ being upset was only half the battle. The other half, the comforting part, Edwin was still hopeless at. He had never been good with people, even while alive. But he loved Charles with all his heart and had to at least try something.

Charles did not like to be interrogated about what he was feeling, especially when emotions were high. Charles did like when Edwin read to him. So, Edwin picked up an Agatha Christie and offered to do just that.

They settled in their usual spots on the sofa, with Edwin sat on the side furthest from the door and Charles laid across with his legs in Edwin’s lap. Reading aloud always seemed to soothe Charles, although Edwin couldn’t begin to understand why. He would have thought it was too reminiscent of the night Charles died, but Charles seemed to enjoy it anyway.

It worked this time for a while, but Edwin noticed Charles get melancholic again. His eyes became far away and his eyebrows were knit with worry. Charles encouraged Edwin to finish the story anyway, and he did, but it didn’t seem to have the same soothing quality as before.

He must have picked a poor choice of a novel. It was a shame, Edwin usually liked Christie’s mysteries, but this one did not hold up. He was trying to explain this to Charles when Charles abruptly flopped onto Edwin with his face buried in his neck.

Edwin reached an arm around Charles in a way that was hopefully comforting, “Are you quite sure you don’t want to talk about what’s bothering you?” he asked gently.

Charles tried to move so he could smile at Edwin, although it didn’t really work with their current position, “I’m alright mate, seriously.”

“Alright,” Edwin tried next, “but it’s okay if you aren’t.” Edwin has learned Charles feels the need to be the sole morale booster of the agency. Edwin was not quite sure how their dynamic ended up like that but he was determined to make room for change. Charles didn’t say any more for a while, but kept his face buried in the crook of his neck. 

“Edwin?” Charles asked, “You know that I love you, right?”

He blinked in confusion, “Of course,” he said while rubbing small circles on Charles' back. Was this somehow related to his mood? How? “I love you too. You know that, right?” 

Edwin could feel Charles’ smile against his skin, “Yeah, I do.” Edwin didn’t know how this related to Charles' poor mood today, but at least he knows that. 

Charles’ behavior grew increasingly strange after that night. He was withdrawn and absent during cases. Especially during cases, he seemed to get quiet in a way that was terribly un-Charles-like. 

He tried talking about it to Charles, but he wouldn’t budge. Every time Edwin would ask, Charles would spend the next few days being overly chipper, before falling back into his withdrawn behavior. Not even Crystal seemed to be able to get him to talk and Charles was usually much more open about these things with her.

Edwin feared he may know what is wrong now. 

He’d gone by the Night Nurse to drop off a copy of their latest case file for the Lost and Found Department. Usually it is a silent interaction, maybe a few pleasantries exchanged but nothing more. This time though, the Night Nurse stopped him on his way out.

“These need to be completed before the full moon,” she said, sliding a large stack of papers across her desk to him. “I would of course do them myself to ensure they are completed properly. But Charles Rowland insisted I take care of some business for him.”

Edwin paused, and slowly picked up the papers, “Business? Of what nature?”

The Night Nurse sighed, “More pestering questions about the Afterlife. I do not understand why children feel they need to know everything!”

Edwin stared at her, “He asked you about the Afterlife? His Afterlife?”

“Yes, that is what I said. I don’t know why he needs to know anything else other than that it is unique but, whatever convinces you boys to move on.” She continued speaking shrilly about how important these papers were and how she was trusting Edwin with this task and her expectations. Usually Edwin would slip in a snide remark or two about her impolite behavior, but he felt too blindsided to bother. He could only nod wordlessly and leave the room.

Charles has never, ever, had any interest in his Afterlife. No matter what anyone said, he was firm in staying on Earth. Why the sudden change? The strange behavior? He never said a word about the Afterlife to Edwin. Not since they were celebrating Edwin’s freedom from Hell.

Oh.

Oh no, no no no. Surely that can’t be it. 

Only that’s when all of this started- it started with Edwin’s asylum being approved. That was when Charles started acting odd. He has been pulling away, from Crystal, from the agency, from Edwin. He has been pulling away and asking questions about the Afterlife. 

Charles didn’t intend on moving on, did he? He never wanted to but he also never asked about it, he also was never so disinterested in their cases.

Edwin returned to their office to find Charles lounging in there. He smiled when Edwin walked in. Edwin swallowed and announced, “The Night Nurse said she needed my assistance with these while she is tied up with another… project.”

Some recognition flashed across Charles’ face. Edwin waited for him to say something. To admit to being behind the Night Nurse’s project and offer an entirely innocuous explanation. 

Instead Charles offered, “I can help you.”

Edwin nearly agreed, the extra load of work needed to get done and he would have appreciated the help. Only, Charles was always helping, wasn’t he? He was always trying to help people, help Edwin. That’s why he stayed on Earth.

Charles stayed on Earth for a great many reasons. Edwin knew he longed for living in a way Edwin never understood. He knew Charles loathed boredom and found Earth exciting. Most of all, Charles was very insistent about staying with Edwin. Even more so, he was insistent on keeping Edwin out of Hell. 

Charles Rowland had spent his entire Afterlife so far with the expressed goal of helping Edwin hide from Hell. It wasn’t the only thing Charles had done, but protecting Edwin was always something he put emphasis on. From desperate attempts to improve Edwin’s self defense to stepping in front of Edwin when he froze. Charles Rowland did his very best to protect his friends. Now, his friends did not need protection. Now, Charles was bored with cases and asking about the Afterlife.

Edwin could not help but wonder if Charles was enthusiastic about an eternity on Earth as he was three months ago when facing the Night Nurse. Or as enthusiastic as he was twenty years ago when he told Edwin he was staying no matter how hard Edwin pushed him towards his Afterlife. 

Edwin hasn’t checked if Charles still wanted to stay, or if his main motivation was feeling like he couldn’t leave Edwin alone to face Hell. Was that why he seemed so tired of them lately?

Edwin swallowed, “I can manage just fine on my own.”

There were many other things that kept Charles on Earth other than a sense of duty. If Charles was thinking of moving on, perhaps he would less if Edwin just reminded him. Made their life here easier for him.

Charles laughed, “Come on mate, my handwriting isn’t that bad.”

“Yes it is legible, but I can handle this. Besides, it’s Saturday, don't  you have plans with Crystal tonight?” he asked. They usually did- Charles liked hanging out with Crystal. He liked live music and people watching and comedy movies. The Afterlife wouldn’t be able to supplement all of that.

Charles looked confused, “Yeah, but we can reschedule if you need help.”

“I am perfectly fine, go enjoy your night,” Edwin assured him. Charles liked hanging out with Crystal, but he loathed filling out paperwork. There was no need to push this on to Charles when he could be doing something he enjoyed.

That night, Edwin resolved to do everything he could to make Charles as happy as possible. He would cut back on things that annoyed Charles or got in his way. Maybe if he reminded Charles of all the other things he loved about Earth, then he would want to stay. Subliminal messaging of sorts. It was horribly selfish, and Edwin felt guilty thinking about it, but Edwin didn’t think he would last long in an eternity without Charles Rowland. He always had a habit of acting selfishly, anyway. What was one more sin to the list?

He started with the incessant scolding. He tried biting back his words whenever Charles was reckless on a case. It was rather difficult, Charles would sometimes act with a level of impulsivity and carelessness for his own wellbeing. Edwin was sure if he didn’t stop such behavior, Charles would find himself grievously injured. He tried to keep his concerns to a minimum and express them with a calm temper. He didn’t want Charles to think he stopped caring but didn’t want to bombard him more than necessary.

He stopped fighting with Crystal over everything. At least around Charles, he liked bickering with Crystal and she felt much the same. But Charles could get exasperated with the fighting, especially during a case. He tried to keep the environment stress free and keep everything running smoothing rather than subject everyone to his poor moods.

The painting was more of a snap decision than part of the plan. It was one of Edwin’s favorite pieces of decor; he found the city coastline pleasant and was charmed by the unusual brushwork, an artistic trend that seemed to come after his time. Charles however loathed it and spent years trying to get Edwin to get rid of it. Apparently the artwork was hideous and driving away clients. When Edwin had spelled the painting so no one but he could take it down, he was mostly being spiteful. Which is an unfortunate habit of his- another unpleasant behavior he was trying to cut back on. So, he removed the painting from where it rested on the wall and found a safe place in the storage room to keep it. If Charles was to continue giving up his Afterlife, Edwin could at least make their space hospitable and aesthetically pleasing. Even if by just removing unfavorable decor and reminders of Edwin’s uncouth stubbornness.

Charles didn’t seem pleased with this specific action when he noticed, for some reason. He campaigned to get rid of the painting for so long, Edwin thought it might bring at least some jubilance. Only Charles seemed saddened, and the painting reappeared in the office a few days later. Charles seemed more withdrawn after the fact and was quick to disappear to Crystal’s. Leaving Edwin alone, unsure of his error, but suddenly terrified his plan was not working at all.

So Edwin resolved to rip the bandages off in one go. Perhaps a more direct approach to convincing Charles to stay would be more effective. He would speak with him soon, he just needed to get his thoughts in order first. It would be unwise to begin such a conversation without a plan. He mulled over it for days but couldn’t settle on the best course of action. He then realized he may or may not be on a time crunch and if he waited any longer, he may be too late.

So one morning, Edwin cleared his throat to get Charles’ attention. “Charles, I must speak with you. It is important.”

Not a bad start, maybe a bit too foreboding if Charles’ facial expression is anything to go by.

“Yeah? Is everything okay?”

He tried to respond, but every second sentence seemed to be wrong. Edwin pressed his fists together to steel his nerves, “Charles, do you wish to move on to you Afterlife?” he finally asked. 

Charles stared in shock- perhaps Edwin was too blunt?- he leaped to his feet, “What? No!” He moved to closer to Edwin, eyes wide with confusion, “Why do you think that?”

Charles seemed entirely stunned by the question, as if the thought never crossed his mind. He was relieved by such a firm answer, but a little embarrassed by Charles’ shock. He felt it was a reasonable question, what with how Charles was acting. “You haven’t been yourself. You’re withdrawn and disinterested in cases. And you’ve been asking the Night Nurse about the Afterlife! You’ve never shown any interest in it before!”

“I wouldn’t leave you,” Charles said plainly.

It was what Edwin wanted to hear, but it still left a sour taste in his mouth. “I would not fault you,” he said, in case it needed to be. “It would be long overdue. I know you were not ready before and felt an… obligation-“

“Obligation?” Charles interjected, “To what?”

Edwin sighed and wanted to bury his face in his hands but refrained. “You are an exceedingly good person Charles. I know you feel that it is your job to protect your friends and that my… predicament with Hell weighted on you-“

“No,” Charles interrupted. “No, what are you talking about mate?” He reached out and put his hands on Edwin’s shoulders and squeezed. “I want to stay with you, no matter what.” Edwin put his hand over Charles’ to keep from crying, “I’m sorry I’ve been distant. I’ve been- well I’ve been worrying about you leaving.”

Edwin frowned, “Where am I going?” he asked. Edwin didn’t particularly enjoy traveling, he only ever did at Charles’ insistence-

“The Afterlife, mate,” Charles laughed. “You aren’t stuck here anymore.”

It was Edwin’s turn to gawk in surprise, “Wha- Charles! Surely you know I could never leave you either?”

Charles shrugged and ducked his head. “It’s different, innit? I’m not blaming you for it.”

Edwin frantically reached for both of Charles’ hands. “It is most certainly not different,” he insisted. “I would not leave you, why do you think that?” Edwin demands, clearly he has erred more terribly than he ever thought if Charles thought he was capable of that. 

Charles only said in response, “You have an actual Afterlife now, the one you were always supposed to have.”

That explained precisely nothing, “So do you and you loathed me suggesting you should be there instead of here with me. Do you think I would not stay for you?”

Charles didn’t answer and Edwin nearly lost his composure, “Charles Rowland, you are the singularly most important person to me. I am so sorry I ever made you doubt that.” he said with as much authority as he could muster.

“I don’t doubt that!” Charles promised quickly, “I just didn’t think… that was enough? I guess. Shit, this isn’t coming out right.”

Edwin wrapped his hands around Charles’ so he was cupping them, “It is more than enough,” he promised, “I am honored to share my Afterlife with you.”

“Oh,” Charles said blankly, “Oh, so you aren’t leaving?” he asked with tentative hope.

“No, and I never plan to,” Edwin said firmly. “If that is amicable for you?” he added.

Charles grinned, “Yeah, that’s sound brills to me- wait, why were you acting weird then?”

Edwin ducked his head in shame, “I thought you were thinking about moving on. And I hoped, rather selfishly, you may stay if I removed some of the…bothersome… aspects of living here.” It sounded even more mortifying and insane said out loud.

“Edwin,” Charles scolded gently. “You don’t have to do that mate. Actually don’t do that at all. I love you and I love what we do. I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me, remember?”

Edwin did remember him saying that, so many years ago. “Yes, it seems we’ve both been rather foolish as of late.”

“Just a touch,” Charles laughed and pulled Edwin close, “I love you.”

Edwin hummed as he returned the hug, “I love you too.”