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My Average CRUSH Turned into an ISEKAI PROTAGONIST: That Time I Became the Overpowered Heroine & Followed Him to Another World!!

Summary:

Despite exclusively watching terrible F-tier television to prevent telepathic spoilers, Kusuo still tries to avoid isekai as a genre. Even ignoring the blatant fan service and across the board bad quality, there are a few characteristics they always have that he just can't stand:

1) the most bland average-joe protagonists you've ever seen,

2) so many clichés that every series being greenlit is identical to all the others,

and, 3) characters that are so ridiculously overpowered that none of the fights are exciting at all.

Simply put, it's a formula that always makes for a bad story, even by his standards. So he doesn't watch them.

...

...... but then why do those tropes sound kind of familiar?

Notes:

i preemptively made a little comic for a scene in this fic!! its posted to my tumblr dirtbagcore if you wanna check it out!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: My Average CRUSH: Gets Visited by Truck-kun!

Notes:

dont get me wrong, i actually really like isekai (despite its many many many flaws as a genre) cause it always gets right to the point of making the main character super cool (instant gratification my love), i always know what to expect going into it just from the title, and theyre all same-y enough that theyre safe but different enough that im not bored. ((so i.e., i enjoy it for a lot of the same reasons i enjoy fanfic (despite fanfic's many flaws too) djgdjsjdhdk))

BUT that doesnt mean i cant make fun of it! so here's this!! (ФωФ)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Hiroshi doesn't know what happened.

All he remembers is finishing a typical day at school and starting the walk he takes home everyday, then.. nothing. Everything feels fuzzy when he tries to remember past a certain point. And now...

'Where is this place?'

It's a white expanse. From the 'floor' under his feet to every direction he tries facing, there's absolutely nothing to see. Just a blank, white void; the only visible colour is the green of his school uniform when he looks down at himself. If he pushes past the fog and thinks back hard enough, he can see vague images in his memory: a stray ball, a little kid, a white truck swerving out of control. Visualizing it is giving him a headache and they're only flashes across his mind, but they paint a clear enough picture.

'Am I... dead?'

"You are still alive, Satou Hiroshi," says a mysterious, feminine voice from somewhere behind him. Hiroshi spins around to face it, and is momentarily struck in awe of what he sees.

Standing there is a woman with long, golden hair flowing in waves all the way down to her feet, dressed in delicately draped white garments and gold jewelery. The eyes that stare back at him are shrowded in what must be a halo, shining so brightly that he can barely see her face. What he can see, though, is gorgeous- he doesn't know if he's ever seen anyone so ethereally perfect looking before. Whoever this lady is, she might even be a rival for Teruhashi! Well, maybe.

Hiroshi hears the woman giggle, and a moment later his brain catches up to him. Oh, she had responded to his thoughts earlier. And so... if she could read his mind....

He feels his face heat up, embarrassed that he'd become so distracted so quickly by her looks.

"Um- !" he sqeaks out, rubbing the back of his head while trying to figure out how to apologize for thinking.

"It's quite alright, Satou-kun," she smiles down at him softly, "You must be wondering why you're here."

"Um, yeah kinda... I mean! Uh, yes ma'am," he replies, because he is curious. If this isn't the afterlife, then what is it exactly? How did he get here, if he's still alive? He definitely hasn't been here before, yet this whole situation is feeling a bit familiar for some reason- does she know why?

The woman has an ever so slightly grieved look about her as she meets his eye. Not unlike pity, if a bit kinder, "I'm afraid you were not wrong with your first perceptions of this place and how you came to be here, child," she confirms, halting his thought process. What? "Although your body has not died, your soul has found it's way to me on it's own. You could call this place a space between worlds- yours, and the one I rule over."

"So, you're some sort of Goddess? Wait-- are you telling me I really was hit by a truck?"

"I am, and yes, I'm afraid so. Your body is being kept alive by modern medicine, but it's simply too injured for your soul to stay attatched to. I am so sorry."

Hiroshi stares in horror at her. That's just as bad as being dead! "I- I can still go back though, right? Once I'm healed enough?"

The Goddess doesn't give him an answer, simply continuing to wear the same sad look on her face. It's answer enough.

"No..." that means his life.. is over. Effectively, he is dead. It might not have been exciting, and sometimes he himself was unsatisfied with how average it was, but his life was still his, dammit! And now, at barely seventeen, it's done. Just like that. Hiroshi stares at the ground in shock, willing himself not to cry despite his bangs covering his eyes to the Goddess' view. He feels his shoulders shake, regardless. How is this fair?

For a long moment, they stay like that. The Goddess standing silent, allowing Hiroshi time to process. Until, after some time, she breaks the silence, "Satou-kun..." she broaches, "If you wish it, there may be something I could do for you."

His head snaps up at her words. As a Goddess, was there something she could do to help his situation?

"I may not be able to return you to your original life," she begins, causing his heart to drop momentarily, "but, it's possible that I could send you to live in the world that I watch over, should you desire it. You would be able to do things that hadn't been possible in your original world- like possessing special skills and learning magic."

Hiroshi is stunned still once again, but in a much different way.

"...Are you offering to isekai me? Is this a prank?" that's why it feels familiar! This whole set up is eerily similar to shows he's watched before- there's no way it could be real though, and even if it was, there's no way he could be the main character! There's nothing special about Satou Hiroshi, he's just an average guy!

More delicate giggling from the lady in front of him, "This is no joke, Satou-kun, and it is very much a real opportunity for you. You'll be able to live out your new life however you please, with abilities you could've only dreamed of. The only thing is..."

"What? There's a catch?"

"...Yes. I hate to involve you in this, Satou-kun, but I fear there may be no other choice. On my world, there's a threat that's been rising to torment my people, too powerful for any to stop it. The Demon King and his army. They plan to take the entire planet under their rule, wiping out humanity entirely!" the woman's voice begins to wobble as she speaks, clearly distraught by the story she's laying out in front of him. After the last word, her breath catches on a sob, curling into herself to speak the final bit into her hands, "The people I've nurtured, my people, are facing extinction at their hands- and th- there's nothing I can do to stop it!" she cries.

'Woah!' she's just going to start crying? Despite feeling a bit like he's being pulled this way and that by this conversation, having trouble wrapping his head around everything, Hiroshi has the inane urge to reach out and comfort the deity in front of him. Though, he stops himself before he can, feeling awkward as he watches her shoulders shake.

"I'm so sorry that's happening, um, miss Goddess. I'm a bit confused though, is there something you think that I'll be able to do about the, uh, Demon King..?"

She pauses in her sobbing, sniffling loudly as she wipes at her cheeks, "Well, now that you mention it..." she peers past her hands with- what he assumes are- big, sparkling eyes, "members of my royalty have been attempting to summon a Hero from another world to fight the Demon King's army, with no luck. I suppose, it's possible that I could bestow a skill apon you that could rival the Demon King, if you're offering to fight in my place..."

Alarm lights up his nerves, "Um-! Uh, no, I wasn't trying to--"

The Goddess breaks into sobs once again, fighting to get words past her hands, "Oh, how selfless you are! To offer yourself to come to my aid, you really are worthy of being a Hero, Satou-kun! And with no time to spare, you really may be our final hope; thank you, oh, thank you!"

Oh nooo.. she's fully convinced he was offering to fight for her. God, that's so much pressure. Shit! What does he say to this? Can he really just shoot her down, after all of that? Hiroshi only just found out that he's effectively dead, at most he'd want to relax in the afterlife and attempt to wrap his head around his new eternity as a spirit, not be sent to fight in the frontlines of some war! Hey, can't she read his mind anyway? So, she must know that it's a misunderstanding already, right?

The Goddess just continues to sob great big crocodile tears into her hands, not seeming aware of his pleas at all. Hiroshi cringes internally, struggling to make a choice with his head spinning from all the new information forced on him in the past five minutes. What is he supposed to do here?!

In her crying, the woman crumples to her knees; for the first time coming down from the impressive height towering above him. The noises she makes are tiny, whimpering things- like the keening of an injured animal. The Goddess really is that overcome by his assumed sacrifice, isn't she? Looking down at her, Hiroshi is distracted from his tumbling thoughts. To think, someone could be this relieved to get help from him of all people- does she really think he would be that useful? That he could actually be some sort of saviour, a Hero? The thought is completely foreign to him, but privately, Hiroshi can admit it sounds almost.. nice.

But, does he really want to overturn his entire life for some half baked fantasy?

'Wait, that's right. I don't have a life to be turned over, anymore. What's stopping me?'

He really hadn't meant to offer his help, but the more he thinks about it, why wouldn't he? This is every boy's dream isn't it, to be a Hero? It's not a role he ever realistically pictured for himself, but being able to save the day was always a secret desire of his- coming across people in need, being at the perfect place at the perfect time to help them, earning their praise and admiration. It'd always been a guilty pleasure to fantasize about, and something too embarrassing to ever tell anyone else about. But for it to become real? Well, he is being trapped by social convention, isn't he?

"...What type of skill would I get?" he broaches gently, trying to be mindful of her feelings even though he couldn't stop himself from just asking his most pressing question. If it's strong enough to fight the Demon King, and if this really is like an isekai, then it has to be overpowered, right? Imagine, average joe Satou Hiroshi with some sort of amazing super power. He's kind of getting a thrill at the thought.

She looks up at him at the question, taking a moment to gather herself before answering. For a brief second, he thinks he catches a glimpse of a smile under the swipe of her hand, but it's gone before he knows for sure. He was probably imagining it.

"All Otherworlders, like yourself, can recieve any number of unique gifts apon their arrival in my domain," the Goddess begins explaining weakly, seeming unsteady from her bout of crying. He's getting the urge to reach out in comfort again, feeling bad for her, but his arms resolutely stay at his sides, "For someone willing to fight the Demon King's army, however, I am able to grant you my Blessing. It's an honour very few have had over the course of history- something that is very effective against demons. I'm sure it will serve you well in your journey to slay the Demon King."

"Cool..." Hiroshi breathes out, sure there are stars in his eyes, "That sounds great!"

"I'm glad," the Goddess says simply, smiling up at him, "Then you best be on your way."

The space around them seems to glow brighter than before, the white quickly becoming blinding in it's intensity. The ground shakes under Hiroshi's feet.

"Huh?" he says dumbly.

"I wish you luck, our new Otherworlder Hero-kun," is all she says.

"But, you haven't explained what it does yet! Don't I need more information?" he exclaims, becoming panicked. The ground falls out from under his feet, leaving him in open air. As he begins to plummet, the last thing he sees is a flash of teeth under sparkling golden hair.

"Wait-!" he calls, but she's already gone; leaving him to his free fall, screaming all the way down.

Notes:

you should probably consider this more like a pilot than an actual chapter. tbh the first chapter was supposed to be twice this length- and not to mention, actually introduce the MC- but! i didnt wanna!! did Not wanna write it yet. just wanted it posted.

so here are some crumbs, i guess!! (・ω・) hope its at least starting to get the vibe across lol

Notes:

only planning on updating when i get a funny idea for a chapter, so please dont expect regular updates
( ´⊇`) i beg

gonna try my best 。。(〃_ _)σ∥

((love you ♡))