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With Itadori Yuuji things were meant to be easy and perfect.
Pastel pink was the world that surrounded their relationship, their future golden and shiny, cushioned and secure.
Pastel pink; their meeting had been then a silly little meet-cute, straight out of a movie like Megumi could not believe was possible, butterflies in his stomach like he always thought was an exaggeration, entranced on honey eyes stupidly. Spilling his coffee all over the handsome stranger.
7:43 a.m. Megumi had entered the terrible campus coffee shop that he never quite liked, but he had woken up late that morning. His hair was a mess, he had thrown on the first shirt and pants he could find and rushed out of his dorm in an attempt to preserve his sense of punctuality. 15 minutes was about enough time to get his coffee and mentalize himself for his miserable first class with his least favorite professor.
Megumi had been grumbling under his breath about the stupid, ridiculous, preposterous prices of coffee in campus and fuck him because he would lost definitely be late for his first class since the idiot making his coffee had messed up twice —somehow–, damn it, and his day got exponentially more awful when opening the door he crashed into someone’s chest, spilling his coffee all over himself.
“Fucking shit-!”
“Ah, I’m sorry!”
All cliches and nonsense; the coffee didn’t only end up all over Megumi, but also on top of some sunny, pretty, perfect boy out of Megumi’s teenage dreams.
Sunny, pretty, perfect gave Megumi the biggest smile, a thousand watts over pearly whites and sheepish eyes, looking wildly between both their shirts, soaked in Peruvian roast. Under normal circumstances Megumi would simply tell the idiot to get lost -and maybe some other less than kind things- then angrily stomp away back to his dorm to stew in his own anger, but those eyes were disarming. And that smile. And those arms…
“Sorry, I’m sorry,” Perfect smile laughed and Megumi could feel himself blushing, “Umm, I would offer to buy you some more coffee but I think there are more important things right now.”
And that, for some reason, made Megumi laugh, “I- yeah- uh-” And stutter too.
“My dorm isn’t too far from here, I can lend you a shirt of mine if you’d like?”
And Megumi, who was paranoid to no end and lived through the stranger danger mentality everyday of his life since he was six, could only stutter, “Y-yes, please.”
Sunny, pretty and perfect smiled at him wider, introduced himself as Itadori Yuuji and, lo and behold, Megumi was done for. And it didn’t really matter that Nobara made fun of him. And that Maki was giving him looks as if saying he was an idiot with only her eyes. And it didn’t matter that Gojo amped up being annoying and nosy about his life. The butterflies in his stomach drowned out all the warnings and concerns.
Itadori Yuuji wasn’t the type of guy that fit with Megumi or that he had envisioned liking.
“He seems sweet,” Nobara teased him after Megumi had more or less invited the pink haired boy to join his friend group.
“He is,” Megumi answered back, watching as Yuuji made himself at home between his friends, fitting like a glove. He was staring very obviously, Nobara shoved at him and quietly told him to be a little less embarrassing about his dumb little crush.
They were stuck together easily after that.
It was dumb, too many of his friends and family members thought so, but dumb in a nice way, they would assure him. It was comical, laughable how Yuuji wormed his way into Megumi’s life like he had always belonged there. It was also glaringly obvious he had not, since they were like water and oil. Yuuji was carefree laughter and dumb jokes and living in the moment, pulling at Megumi’s hands tentatively to follow him and let himself be followed.
He liked manga and going on early runs and invading Megumi’s personal space, giving him the wrong idea.
“Let’s go to the movies,” Yuuji said, splayed over Megumi’s mattress in Megumi's apartment while the dark haired boy worked on some assignment.
“Mmm, and watch what?”
Yuuji straightened up in excitement, looking at Megumi with that lovely smile of his, “There’s this new human earthworm movie coming out so-”
“Oh my god, not again.”
“The premise of this one seems really good! You’ll like this one more than the last, I swear!” Yuuji bemoaned, shooting Megumi puppy eyes.
Like he always did, suggesting a god awful movie that Megumi would probably hate, Megumi released a deep sigh, “Alright.” He’d let him win, as always.
It was their routine, giving and taking and allowing the other to win too. It was like discovering a whole new world always, exploring unafraid, between soft kisses and immature pinky promises, annoying and bad horror movies, boring non fiction books and everything in between. Megumi thought of Yuuji’s existence by his side, his compass.
The progression of time only made Megumi feel more sure. Of course they had been young and naive when they first met, but as time passed he watched their life together unfold right before his eyes. Yuuji graduated before him, got an apartment and didn't waste a second before asking Megumi to move in with him. A ‘yes’ was final, loud, and undisputed. Gojo had looked at the boys and smiled widely; he had cleared his schedule for helping them pack and move their belongings to their home. He had also made a nasty hand sign and a dirty comment about making sure they made sure to not ‘disturb the neighbors. Maki helped them arrange their bigger furniture as stoically as she always was, made no comment about them moving together. Nobara was loud and eager in her support, organizing a house warming party within seconds of finding out they were moving together. She bought them a set of 8 glass cups they didn’t need and some champagne to drink between the boxes they still hadn’t unpacked. They did not like it and ended up ordering fried chicken and beers, Nobara called them unclassy but ate and drank nonetheless.
When people looked at Yuuji and Megumi they always imagined they would stay together forever.
Or maybe not.
Maybe the later hours, the quietness, the snappiness so uncharacteristic of his Yuuji. Or it was that maybe that wasn’t his Yuuji anymore.
The apartment was cold and quiet when Yuuji entered that night. Late, far too late, and even then Megumi sat in the living room waiting for him.
“Hi.” Megumi choked out over the tension.
“Hello;” Yuuji’s answer was curt and short and so unlike him.
It was killing Megumi not knowing what was going on and he had wanted to let Yuuji have some space, but he also knew that it was better to confront things early or at least before it was too late.
“Anything interesting happened today at work?”
“No.”
“A good day then?”
“It was fine.”
Megumi frowned as he watched Yuuji simply throw his shoes to the side and his bag by them. His shoulders and back tense as he padded into the kitchen and poured himself a glass of water.
“Doesn’t sound all that fine from your tone.”
“It was fine, Megumi.”
“You sure?”
“Don’t know why you’re doubting me or prying so much.”
“Because you’re talking to me like you’d rather still be at work dealing with literally anybody else.”
Yuuji set the glass down on the counter with more force than necessary, Megumi feared for a second that it would shatter into his boyfriend’s hand, “Drop it, please.”
“No. Yuuji, you’re clearly bothered by something and I’m your boyfriend, I worry about you, and I’m really worried right now-”
“There’s nothing going on, Megumi, just drop it ok? I’m tired, let's just get to bed-”
“Yuuji.” Megumi called out to him, making the pink haired man freeze on his spot, “What’s happening with you?”
The silence between them was thick, suffocating and Megumi feared the worst. He watched as he rolled his shoulders, clenched his fists, released a heavy breath and prepared for the worst.
“... My grandpa died last week.” Megumi felt the air leave his lungs.
Itadori Wasuke was all Yuuji had. Megumi knew the man, old but energetic in an almost spiteful way. The man frowned most of the time Megumi saw him, grumpy and muttering under his breath most of the time Megumi saw him. But he was a good man, always soft with Yuuji
“Oh Yuuji-”
“And he asked me to reconcile with- with my dad- in his will,” Yuuji choked out. Megumi didn’t have the chance to say anything else before Yuuji continued, “Asked me to meet with him and try to rebuild our relationship together- and- Megumi, I thought he was dead, Dead!” He raised his voice, he was laughing now, but in a rather hysterical way, Megumi took a step towards him, “Turns out he just left me with my grandpa because my mother wasn’t ready for kids. And did you hear that? My mother. My mother wasn’t ready for kids!” He exclaimed loudly, “So they dropped my at my grandpa’s door and he told me- made me believ my whole life that my parents were dead! Truns out they just… didn’t want me… I don’t know how I feel yet.”
Regardless of Yuuji’s erratic attitude Megumi’s reaction remained soft, “Oh Yuu, I’m so sorry about Wasuke and he asked that of you, put you in that position. God, You should’ve told me sooner, Yuu, I know it’s selfish of me to ask, but you know I’m here for you always… Umm- maybe we can look into contacting your father in the future if you still want to, but I think we should sleep on it right now, baby, you look exhausted. Let’s go to bed-” He grabbed Yuuji’s hand and pulled softly in the direction of their bedroom.
“I’m moving to the States in a week, Megumi.”
Megumi took a second before he could muster a response. “What?”
“I finished the passport transaction and purchased the ticket today. I’m leaving.”
“Leaving?” Megumi asked quietly, “Leaving without me, I assume, since I don’t even have a fucking passport.” He snapped, feeling his chest heavy and his eyesight turning blurry. He swallowed he bitterness in his throat and continued, “Well, I can get one in the meantime, then we can visit again sometime after you come back-”
“I took out a visa. I’m moving there with my dad, I already talked to him.” Megumi felt like he was being punched in the gut, “The visa lasts five years… Grandpa told me not to end like him in his will… Be surrounded by family like I wasn’t… I’m sorry, Megumi.”
Hopes and dreams thrown into the abyss, Megumi had watched as Yuuji packed all his stuff neatly into a suitcase, a single sad look over his shoulder and he had closed the door to their life together, a soft click the only signal that things were done.
All he could do was sink into the couch, that had once been their couch, and sob.
[cut]
With Ryoumen Sukuna things were meant to be hard and awful. A boat waiting to sink.
Megumi had been fresh out of his relationship with Yuuji when he met Sukuna. He had been chugging straight vodka in the staircase of the shithole apartment complex he had moved into in an attempt to escape the memories of his lovely and done relationship when he heard him.
A low whistle, mocking and a rich deep voice, “Hey there, sweetheart.” Low, flirty, a little condescending, settling into Megumi’s bones alongside the vodka.
“Fuck off,” He slurred, annoyed, yes, but also feeling so close to tears he knew he would start the waterworks within the next 2 minutes and he would much rather be alone for it, thank you very much.
“Mmm, bad day, baby?” The man bothering him did not take the hint.
“Fuck. Off.” Megumi took another swig of the bottle.
The stranger laughed and unceremoniously dropped by his side, his body warm and sturdy against Megumi.
“Wanna talk about it?”
Megumi took a long swig of his bottle and smacked his lips, “Nope. And why the fuck would I tell you anything, anyway? I don’t know you.”
The stranger laughed, eyes sparkling in amusement and flashing him a sharp grin, “‘Cus then I can’t judge you… But you’re right, you don't know, so you can't trust me.” He eyed Megumi up and down with dark eyes that made him shiver and then looked him straight in the face again, “You look like you need to tell somebody, though.”
Megumi scoffed and rolled his eyes, trying his best to put some distance between them, and being unsuccessful, he sent the stranger a dirty look, “And you’re so trustworthy, I bet.”
“Oh, so it’s a big secret? Now I’m even more curious.”
Megumi felt his eyes sting and tried to push the other man away, “Fuck off.”
“Come on, baby.”
And the words had felt a little disgusting and a little sleazy but just the right amount of sweet, and maybe that was just what he needed, because damn it maybe he just wanted to sob and curse out and have somebody to tell all this shit to that wasn’t necessarily their friend. That wasn’t Nobara or Maki or Gojo. Somebody who’d comfort Megumi without being caught in the middle. Somebody who wouldn't know about Yuuji Itadori and how much of a gem he was. Let him be the douchebag that had left Megumi for no reason at all for one night. Let Megui hate him properly for a moment.
Megumi took a long drink from his bottle and sighed heavily, his tears leaking free, “My boyfriend left me, like, two weeks ago.”
Two weeks and three days since Yuuji had packed his shit and left. Megumi had been counting.
“Ah,” Was all the man provided as commentary.
Megumi didn’t read too much into the reaction. The fucker had wanted to know, so now he would now to all extent, “Thought we were pretty solid, you know? We had been going two years strong; had all the right shit, degrees, an apartment, knew each other's families… He was bad at hiding things and I found the ring he was going to propose with.” He tried to take another drink from the bottle but it was gently removed from his hand, he would’ve fought, but he was too tired, too sad, and when an arm snaked itself around him, a big warm hand over his waist, he simply let it be, “I just- fuck- I don’t know what went wrong…”
“I bet.”
“We had a good thing going on,” Megumi sobbed, resting his head on the stranger’s shoulder, relaxing a little into the fingers massaging his scalp and softly playing with his hair.
“I’m not good at consoling people, baby, but I don’t think he’s all that, not worth getting alcohol poisoning, atleast.”
“You don’t know him,” Megumi defended instantly. His tone whiny and nasal as he buried his face in the unknown man’s arm, dirtying his shirt with tears, “You don’t know him like I do! He was- he was so nice and- and sweet and always so selfless and- and-” He dissolved into ugly sobs again.
He felt his back being patted, a patronizing ‘there, there’ over his misery.
“Don’t know what to tell you there, baby. Can’t say I’ve been through something similar.”
“God, why did I even tell you that?” He whined.
“‘Cus you clearly needed it, sweetheart.”
“No, I didn’t fucking need it. I just- I need-” He released a stuttered breath and then sniffled, “I need him back.”
“I’m sure you don’t.”
Megumi lifted his face up, and stared at the unknown man, trying his best to focus on all his features. All broad shoulders, tattoos on his face, on his wrists, probably somewhere else below his clothes. And pink hair.
“What’s your name?” Megumi slurred out.
Pink haired stranger lifted a curious eyebrow and smirked, “Sukuna. Yours, baby?”
“Megumi,” He answered back, sniffled and continued, “Hey, Sukuna.”
“Yeah?”
“Do you want to have sex?” He was heartbroken, miserable and drunk, he should probably not be taking such a decision. But maybe he didn’t need good judgment at the moment. Maybe he just needed the strange hot man who had approached him and who had pink hair just like his ex to fuck him. Maybe good enough to forget about Yuuji. Maybe bad enough to ruin the memory of pink.
“Sure thing sweetheart.”
They had been a boat waiting to sink, but damn it all, Megumi wanted to go down with it.
It was not good saying that he had allowed his drunk ass to be dragged into a stranger’s apartment and he had let said stranger fuck the daylights out of him in an attempt to forget about his ex. But it wasn’t like Megumi thought he would have to explain his and Sukuna’s relationship to anybody. He could cry and scream and moan into Sukuna’s pillows, roll on his covers, scratch at his back and then do the walk of shame the next day. Forget him and find another way to forget Yuuji too.
He hadn’t counted on the fact that Sukuna was actually his next door neighbor and that Sukuna was actually similar enough to Yuuji that he would somehow worm his way into Megumi’s life in all the wrong ways. They bickered, Sukuna got on his nerves, called him petnames, made him blush and then fucked Megumi until he felt like fainting.
At some point the thoughts for the tattooed man went from “I can’t fucking stand him” to simply hoping Sukuna wouldn’t bore of him too fast. Which wasn’t the case, because over the course of the next few months they somehow took a silent step together into a relationship. One day, Megumi realized he had a toothbrush, a towel and a side of the bed dedicated to him in Sukuna’s apartment. His own mug, spare clothes and all his work stuff. Sukuna knew how he liked his coffee and Megumi knew how Sukuna liked his tea. It was slow and fast; fast action in their bodies and their chemistry and touches, fucking any other night, making out at any time, looking at each other like they hung the moon. Slow in their words, it had taken a painful year and a half of mindblowing sex and nerve wracking pining before they had stumbled into a confession when Sukuna got jealous of Megumi’s coworker.
But it was all fine after that. Sure, Sukuna wasn’t the most inviting person ever, Gojo didn’t like him and the feeling was mutual. Sukuna didn’t particularly care about any of his friends, again, a mutual feeling. He had no college education, an apprenticeship at some nice enough restaurant and a bouncer job to pay his bills was all he could offer him.
But Sukuna loved Megumi. Not a great life, but a good one.
Megumi knew their up was finally moving together, and as the pessimist he was, waited for their all time low with bated breath. Which came in the form of his boyfriend missing their anniversary.
Why? Because he got stabbed in the face during his bouncer job. Megumi had been worried as he blew the candles he had set and put their dinner plates away when he got a call from the hospital about Sukuna’s accident.
Megumi had rushed over and only briefly talked with a nurse about the incident, a drunk club goer getting rowdy about being removed from the premises had broken a bottle and aimed at Sukuna with a shard. Then he was looking at his boyfriend’s bloody face and only one of those beautiful dark eyes he loved so much.
“I really don’t know why you’re with me…” Sukuna confessed the day they arrived home together after his surgery to safely remove his eyeball.
Despite his tough exterior, and even interior at times, he mellowed too. Megumi mellowed him. They laid together in bed, tired beyond belief, counting with one hand all the issues in their apartment, all the fixings they needed to do and on the other their paychecks stashed together in order to afford Sukuna’s surgery.
Megumi brushed Sukuna’s hair out of his face, thumbing softly, sweetly over the patch that covered his empty eye socket and the scarred skin around it.
“Sukuna, come on-”
“I mean it, blessing… Paying for my surgery with all the money you had saved, another debt I owe…”
“You don’t owe me anything, Sukuna. I did what I did because I love you…” Megumi confessed easily, scooting over and pecking Sukuna’s lips.
“Maybe I don’t,” Sukuna choked out while Megumi pulled him into a deeper kiss.
“You do,” Megumi countered easily. Sukuna’s eyes were easy to read. Terribly glassy too. “You love me, and I love you, Kuna… We’ll get through this.”
“We won’t,” Sukuna denied, “We won’t, goddamnit, Megumi, I didn’t- I don’t want to take you down with me, baby… Please break up with me, Megumi, please do it.” He begged, holding onto him tightly
“Take down? You’re being dramatic, Sukuna. You lost an eye, had surgery and you’re alive. We can move from this, just… given time.”
Megumi has wanted to be good for Yuuji; his boyfriend then had been selfless and understanding and Megumi had tried his best to be the same for him. He had watched him go and follow a path by himself with no discussion and no objection. He had slipped like water between his fingers and Megumi had learnt how to be fine with that, somehow. He had moved on and knew the past would stay the past, no use pondering about what could’ve been.
But Sukuna was not his past; Sukuna was his present, he still had him between his arms and Megumi would not let him go. He was far more than willing, more than ready to hold onto him, drag his stupid fucking boyfriend kicking and screaming forward. Megumi had learnt how to be petty and selfish and he’d keep Sukuna, no matter how much he begged to be left behind.
“The only thing I’m worried about right now is that you’ll lose a finger trying to cook. I know you don’t love my cooking but you’ll have to take it for as long as it takes before you regain a semblance of depth with just one eye, Sukuna, I mean it. You’re not getting more stitches.”
“...I love you.” Sukuna sniffled and buried his face in the crook of Megumi’s neck.
“You’re so dramatic, Sukuna… I love you too… Maybe I could buy you some stylish eye patches if you want.”
“Shut up.”
Megumi fell asleep holding Sukuna. playing with his hair and throwing ‘I love you’s back and forth, more sure than ever that if being selfish was the solution to his problems.
[cut]
It was too fucking early for this, Megumi thought. Too fucking early to pass by the doctors office to look for Sukuna’s new pain medication in a snowy day, and Sukuna had told him as much. Getting up at ass o’clock by himself, he had planned to get ready in silence, leave, collect his prescription and meds, go back home and slip right below the covers again, all by himself and before Megumi woke up.
That was not the case. His plan was promptly soiled by those stupid puppies he had gotten Megumi, that the younger one insisted on having sleep by their feet on the bed with them. The little mutts, as Sukuna called them, started whining and barking as soon as they saw him putting on his shoes. Trying to shush them back into sleep proved unsuccessful, because Megumi started stirring and blinked blearily at Sukuna and then frowned prettily, pouting and fumbling with the covers, grumbling about the pink haired man and his stupid self sufficient attitude.
The rest was history, as they say, and now Megumi stood grumpily outside the clinic, freezing his ass off but refusing to let his boyfriend go alone.
“You literally don’t have to be here,” Sukuna told him before he left for his check up, “I told you to stay in bed and sleep until I was back.”
“It’s fine, I wanted to come.”
“That’s a fucking lie and we both know it. Zip that coat all the way up, damn it,” Sukuna grumbled as he zipped his coat up and pulled something from the bag he had snatched from their counter at home, “Eat this and wait for me, I’ll only take a little while.”
Megumi sighed, watched as his boyfriend left and bit into the muffin in his hand —banana, chocolate and a bit of coffee, Sukuna’s latest insane concoction–, pulling his coat tighter around himself, shivering pitifully and wondering how much longer Sukuna was going to take.
It was surprising and jarring in ways Megumi did not like. Uncomfortable and totally not his fault, the way his heart skipped a beat in anxiousness when he made eye contact with Itadori Yuuji after 5 years apart.
Maybe Yuuji didn’t think the same, as he offered him a smile. That smile; the sunny, pretty, perfect one, the one that had caught Megumi's heart years ago. The one that Megumi had loved and hated and eventually gotten over.
“Megumi?” He asked, tone excited.
“Yuuji, hi.”
“Hi, it's been a while, how are you? You look amazing, by the way!”
Megumi smiled softly to himself, easing back into Yuuji’s presence instantly, like he had once. Almost like he had never left. “You don’t look too bad yourself. How’ve you been, Yuuji? I didn't know you were back in japan.”
“Thanks, and yeah, I just got back.” He offered Megumi a sheepish smile, “It’s been a while, what are you up to lately?”
Ah, there was that Yuuji. He, who had once been his Yuuji. Wanting to know all about Megumi, asking all the right questions and smiling bright enough to illuminate his life, once.
“Well-”
“Meg!”
Megumi and Yuuji both turned to look at the person calling. Yuuji stared in silence as Megumi’s slightly guarded face that had offered only a sliver of a smile to him, that courteous thing he used to offer to most strangers, split into a wide grin. The ice around him thawed as an unknown tattooed man approached.
Yuuji watched, a little more than baffled as said man, —big, bad, tatted, an obvious no good kind– leaned over and shared a peck with Megumi, a pout on his face.
“How was it?” Megumi asked, still smiling wide and sweet.
“Fine… We talked about the reconstructive surgery options-”
“Kuna,” Megumi admonished softly, “I’ll support you in whatever you decide, but you know you don’t need it. You look handsome just the way you are right now.”
Big and tall in a way he dwarfed Megumi, voice gruff and tone edgy, a mean frown and over face tattoos, the man blushed and pursed his lips together in a pout, staring into Megumi’s eyes for a second and then buried his face in the dark haired man’s shoulder.
“Shut up…” He grumbled, “Let’s just go back home, I’m freezing.” He pulled at Megumi’s waist.
Megumi followed him without complaint, a hand over his mouth to muffle his laughter. He turned around for a second and looked at Yuuji over his shoulder.
Smiling, older, mature, happy. Megumi’s eyes shone as he told Yuuji, “I’ll tell everybody you’re back. You know how Gojo is, he’ll want to throw you a big party when he knows you’re back.” He reached for the tattooed man’s hands and squeezed, “I’ll introduce you two then. I’m sure you and Sukuna will get along just fine.”