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“Going to the store is just an everyday chore, Yuji, no matter how awful the music is there, we still must eat,” Megumi said with a sigh, gripping the steering wheel as he tried to convince Yuji to calm down.
He did not calm down.
“There’s just… so many people, so many things. The music is awful and there are germs everywhere, like, you’d think somewhere we’d put our food would be less of a breeding ground for diseases,” Yuji said as if he had eaten the whole box of twinkies before they left.
He probably did.
“Don’t care, you’re coming with me,” Megumi finalized, backing into a parking spot. “Because I hate it equally as much and we need to…”
“To what?” Yuji asked after Megumi paused, putting the car in break and ripping the key out of the engine.
“We need to shop together because I know you ate all the twinkies, and there's probably more things that I’ll discover you used when I need them, it's best if you just tell me now,” Megumi explained, checking himself in the mirror while Yuji watched intently.
Megumi began to break a sweat, trying not to look at the guy in the passenger seat. “Alright- let's go,” he finalized, hopping out of the car, slamming the door behind him.
He walked- or rather, stormed his way into the grocery store, but he had only gotten halfway to the door when he discovered Yuji wasn’t by his side. In fact, he’d never even gotten out of the car.
“Get out of there before I have to drag you inside and make a scene- that’ll make things worse for the both of us!” Megumi whispered aggressively, pulling open the door.
“Think about meeeee, Megimoo moo!” Yuji pleaded, shoving Megumi’s face away from him, gently. “I don’t want to go into the store. We can just pay someone to do it!”
“I don’t have money- you don’t have money, that won’t work out.”
“Why are we going to the store if you don’t have money?” Yuji asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Well I have enough money for groceries!” He said, almost in a yell. Loud enough to turn heads. And heads did turn. “Come in with me or else I’ll…”
“What?” Yuji taunted.
“I’ll… Uh… Tell Nanami…” He stammered. “I’ll tell him about last fall.”
“You’d never!”
“I will. Get out,” Megumi said, stepping away from the door and holding it open for him, pointing a thumb to beckon him out.
He did so with a slight pout, crossing his arms as they walked through the parking lot together this time. Or at least- partially together. Megumi made Yuji (got it right this time) walk 10 feet ahead of him, just to make sure he didn’t try and run back to the car without him noticing.
Right off the bat, a hyper-pop song blaring obnoxiously over the speakers burned their ears as Megumi struggled to grab a cart from the cart holder thingy.
“I think you have to pay for it, Megumi,” Yuji interrupted, pulling a quarter from his wallet and putting it in the slot- but only after three full minutes of watching Megumi struggle with pulling it out.
“Touche…” Megumi said, shaking his head with contentment as he was finally able to pull the cart out of the thing. “Alright- first on the list is… snacks.”
“Okay. This isn’t so bad. I thought we’d spend an hour in the bread section trying to decide between… breads,” Yuji said, a bit of a pep in his step as he walked alongside Megumi. “Can I get in the cart?”
“No.”
“Please?” He asked, partially distracted by the spinning rotisserie chickens. (hope he isn’t vegan)
”No, you’re practically a grown man, Yuji, you don’t need to,” Megumi scolded.
“Fine.” His arms crossed again. “Hey! Look! Shrek” Yuji exclaimed, picking up a t-shirt from the clothing section.
“Put it in the cart…” Megumi said, annoyed that it was taking so long to get to the snacks, but they eventually arrived. Although, there was one problem. “Alright- what snacks do you want?”
“Fruity pebbles.” Yuji smiled.
“That’s not a snack… How about granola bars? Or cookies?” He suggested, picking up a box of chocolate covered granola bars.
“Fruity pebble granola bars!” Yuji shrieked, drawing Megumi’s attention from the protein facts of the cheez-itz.
“Do you know how many chemicals they jack that stuff up with?” Megumi scoffed. “Put it in the cart.”
“Alright!” Yuji said, a triumphant gleam in his eyes. “What do you want?”
“Uhhh…”
“We haven’t got all day, Megumi…”
“You go get the milk-” He pressed, looking over his list.
“What snack do you want?” Yuji said, throwing a bag of Taki’s in the cart.
“That’s… I’ll get it when you leave, okay?” Megumi attempted to say casually, but it did not come out casually.
“Why?”
“Go!”
Yuji raised his eyebrows in surprise, silently excusing himself to find the milk- which was probably not the right job for him, because he somehow wound up in the dog food isle, and debated buying some- just in case.
Meanwhile, Megumi stuffed a box of his favorite snacks in the basket, using the shrek t-shirt to cover it up.
After Megumi had finished getting the rest of the groceries, he started to look for a line to pay, but quickly realized he hadn’t seen Yuji since he sent him to get the milk.
He checked the milk section- in case he had trouble making a decision between 2% and whole, but he wasn’t there.
Yuji had been looking for Megumi as well, but he was way off target and was looking for him in the sporting goods aisle.
Megumi began to slightly panic, and then maybe feel a twinge of relief having finally gotten rid of him for a few moments, immediately feeling guilty for the thought that crept upon him, whenever the pop song on the speakers was interrupted.
“Mr. Megumi, please visit the Help center, your friend is here waiting for you.”
“I got the milk!” Yuji said as soon as he saw him with his basket full of bagged groceries.
“Congratulations- we’re done here, finally,” He groaned, giving a nod to the ladies at the front desk as a thank you for keeping him in check.
Just as they were leaving, a song came over the intercom. A good song.
“Aww c’mon!” They both said in union, their hands full of grocery bags.
The unthinkable happened. A car ran them both over.
Megumi had told Yuji to stop swinging the bags around so carelessly. He didn’t know if his snacks were in the bags in his hands, or Yuji’s. He just hoped that Yuji didn’t want to look in any of them.
Unfortunately, Megumi tripped after trying to stop Yuji from running out in front of a car. His plastic, flimsy bags ripped open, and out came the snacks.
“Goldfish cupcake flavored!? Teddy Grahams!? Granola bars- oh wait that’s normal- is this a pickle flavored chip?!” Yuji laughed, picking up the groceries out of the parking lot frantically.
“Shut it,” Megumi ordered, snatching his teddy grahams away with a scowl. “They’re delicious and I can still tell Nanami about last fall.”
“Hey- next time you go to the store, I’m coming whether you like it or not. This is great blackmail. Especially when you couldn’t get the grocery cart out for a full three minutes.”
“Har har har… Remember when you cried for mommy over the intercom?” Megumi shot back.
“Yeah yeah… I guess we’ll just have to lie about what really happened here today,” Yuji said, throwing the groceries into the trunk of the car.
“Swear?” Megumi asked.
“Swear.”
Just as they finished putting away the groceries, a man ran out of the grocery store, hollering about a thief.
“Wow, that’s crazy, someone should really find that guy,” Yuji said, putting the milk away.
“Did you… pay for that?” Megumi asked, pointing to the jug Yuji buckled into the backseat like a child.
“…no.”
THE END