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Maul had not said a word unless he was spoken to and was expected to give a formal response. He had noticed that the adults around him were paying attention to him because of this, but he could not manage to play the normal child's game. All his thoughts were on his lightsaber, which would be red, and soon the kids around him would be training even more enthusiastically to master the basics of wielding the weapon, and they would be training with their own lightsabers. Maul would be expected to do the same, and there were only so many times he could "forget" his own lightsaber before someone got annoyed that he was airheaded and asked him to go and fetch it.
When that happened, they would all know.
When they got back, Maul secluded himself in the Archives and kept a low profile until Master Nu woke him up, making him realise he had fallen asleep.
"Well young man, I think it's time for you to return to the Crèche."
"Mmm... don't want to."
"I'm sure you don't, but the Masters are worried and are looking for you everywhere."
Maul grumbled something about not being a kid, Master Nu nodded with conviction every time and guided him gently towards the rest of the Temple, trusting the Temple Guards to make sure he got home safely while she closed the Archives for the night.
Dodging the Crèche, Maul made his way unnoticed towards Eeth's flat and managed to enter the code and open the door.
"Good night," he murmured with a yawn as he entered, barely hearing the answer behind him as the door closed.
"Sleep well, kid."
Walking blindly into the dark, Maul trusted his memory and found the sofa, climbed on it and immediately rolled into a ball on it, curling up in the thick, soft plaid.
The smells on the fabrics were familiar and comforting as he rested his head on a Zabrak pillowcase strong enough not to be damaged by his horns. He fell asleep quickly, soothed by the peaceful, warm and welcoming energy he felt in the room just a few steps away.
The next morning he was awoken to the extremely domestic and strangely comforting sight of a couple laying the table and preparing breakfast.
"Is everything all right?" Eeth asked in a very gentle tone as he crouched down to face him." The Crèche has been informed that you've come here, how are you? "
"I'm fine," he murmured as he straightened up, dodging the worried gaze of the Zabrak in front of him. "What time is it?"
"Time for the children to get up," Master Windu said as he left the kitchen to look at him. "Come on, you must be hungry."
It was not really the case, he had lost his appetite, but tried to eat anyway, playing with his food to save time. Despite his efforts, the two Jedi Masters shared several glances before Windu finally made up his mind to find out more at the root of the situation.
"Did something go wrong when you went to get your kyber?"
"No, it was... self-evident. I found it very quickly, it was calling me."
"That's great! What colour is it?" Eeth asked innocently, unable to hide his excitement.
"What colour do you think it is?" Maul asked in return with a smirk that seemed to be enough for the other to play along.
"Hmm... somehow I don't think blue is your colour, so I'd say a shade of green?"
"Windu?"
"Not purple, or you would have annoyed me the second you walked through that door."
"Saying ‘not purple’ isn't enough Mace, that's not even the point, pick a colour that you think is the colour of the crystal."
Korun looked at his partner speculatively before sighing.
"I agree with you, probably green. In general, the colour is something that reflects your personality."
Maul winced discreetly at that. Red, the colour of the Sith. It was who he was at heart, no matter how hard he tried to hide it, no matter how sincerely he tried to change, it was who he was. He was the son of a Nightsister, a Dark Witch, and a Sith Lord.
You could not change what you were. No matter how hard he tried to convince himself otherwise, it was as if his destiny was already completely mapped out for him.
You can't escape your destiny.
"So, are we right?"
"I'm not telling you. Only to Savage."
"Why not?"
"It's private."
The Jedi looked at each other without understanding.
"Far be it from me to say it's desirable or even acceptable to activate a lightsaber at every turn but... it's not that restricted here."
Were they going to force him to show it?
"Hey, it's okay, you don't have to show it to anyone, you don't even have to use it," Windu continued quickly, looking worried.
Maul must not have been able to contain his fear well enough. For once, he did not care if it was a form of weakness: if they left him alone, he would accept the label of weak.
It was better to be weak and a protected pet than powerful and an enemy to defeat.
The day it would spread, everyone would say they had been right: once a Sith, always a Sith, they had wasted their time, there was nothing to save in him.
And it would be his own fault, because he would have proved them right.
Maul could only hope he had enough strength in his legs to run as far as he could, because he doubted they would let him go.
He would end up locked up in a Darksider prison and if there was one fate he felt was worse than death, that was it. The confinement, the isolation, it was driving people mad. Maul had already experienced madness, never again.
"Don't worry, it'll be fine," Eeth promised as he led him back to the door once the meal was over, trusting him to find his way home. "Everything will be fine."
For once, Maul selfishly took advantage of the embrace offered and seeked refuge in the protective and stable cuddle.
It might be the last time he would be allowed one before the Exhibition, so he might as well indulge himself and allow himself this weakness.