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*ring-ring*

Summary:

Bureau for strange magic occurrences, rogue fecal demons and other supernatural disasters; this is Ralathor speaking...

Notes:

You will get a wall of text and you'll like it.

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(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

*ring-ring*

- Bureau for strange magic occurrences, rogue fecal demons and other supernatural disasters; this is Ralathor speaking… *deep sigh* Yes, Your Imperial Highness. Yes, it’s been… what? No, we do not deal with deathknight hopefuls here. No. Yes. Yes, strange magic occurrences, that’s right! Yes. I… I suppose, if something concerning them… yes. Who should vet them? Well, that’d be you, Your Imperial Highness. No. Yes, the law states so very clearly: The Deathknights of Crail hopefuls are to be thoroughly vetted first, by His Imperial Highness, Lord Zargothrax, in person. No, there is no way that could be misunderstood. No. Yes, Your Imperial Highness, that is what the law says. Who’d sign such stupid law? That *deep sigh* that’d also be you, Your Imperial Highness. Yes. Please, do not snarl like that, Your Imperial Highness, you are going to choke again. Yes. No. Okay, could you… could you tell me exactly what is going on? I don’t think I’m quite following. Yes. Mhm. Mhm. Mhmmmm. Yes, I see. Mhm. New Dreadlord. Well, yes, I suppose the previous one did bite the dust rather early, didn’t he? That’s sadly what happens when one meddles in the affairs of the goblin trade union. Maybe I should try that. Nothing, Your Imperial Highness. Please, continue! Mhm. Well, I suppose you stabbed him. There’s no other way I know that’d make a Dreadlo— of course he’s a Shade now, why wouldn’t he be?! The Deathknights of Crail hopefuls are to be thoroughly vetted first, by His Imperial Highness, Lord Zargothrax, in person; does that ring a bell?! As in, you have to check for magical talents they might possess, before you stab the— I am not yelling, I am talking in a slightly raised voice! And what do you suppose I should do about that?! Don’t you “Ralathor” me, Zargothrax! This is entirely on you! ”Your Emperor”, you’re a slacker, that’s who you are! Because I will have to deal with this now! Because you couldn’t be bothered to run a simple test that would take five minutes, to complete! Five minutes, Zargothrax! At most! No! Yes! No, I won’t! You— Tell you what, you can get your arse back to your fancy throne and start looking for a new Dreadlord! And for a new head of this bureau as well, while you’re at it, because I’m done! No! No, I don’t even have the personnel needed to run things around here, let alone send them out to look for a Shade! A Shade, Zargothrax! I don’t care! Send the deathknights then! They can do something else than scaring the peasants for once! No! No! I’ll be seeing you alright! Slacker!

*SLAM*

*deep breath*

*angry screaming*

Notes:

Do NOT assume I'll be working in the ''canon'' from now on. This was just too funny of an idea to pass up. If I get more, this work will be updated. For now that's it. Yes, it's been 7 months and that's all I have to show for them. deal.

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