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Felix Felicis

Summary:

Felix Felicis - liquid luck - a golden potion that will grant incredible luck for a short period of time.

Potter Luck - the gift and curse of Potter’s to be able to go from the worst of situations to the best of situations.

What happens when The-Boy-Who-Wouldn’t-Die ingests Felix Felicis, while having basilisk venom and phoenix tears in his veins?

Chapter 1: Potter Luck Be Luckin

Chapter Text

Harry sat in the Room of Hidden Things, leaning against a cabinet, surrounded by towers of junk and treasure alike. Next to him was a bust of some time-forgotten wizard who looked like what happened when a molerat mated with a person, wearing a gaudy tiara. In his fingers he held a tiny potion vial, filled with a shimmering golden potion.

Dumbledore insisted he get a memory from Slughorn. So stupid, if Albus-named-after-a-donkey-Dumbledore couldn’t get the memory, how was Harry supposed to? He continues to twist the vial. If he drinks it, then the odds of him getting it would greatly increase. But does he really want to waste a once in a lifetime potion on getting a memory from a creepy old teacher?

There are so many better things he could use it for.

To defeat old voldie shortys.

To win the lottery.

To burn his relatives home to the ground and not get caught.

So many possibilities.

What if he took half the dose….would it be half as effective or last half as long? He stands up and starts to pace in front of the cabinet, debating his choices, while still playing with the vial. Suddenly, he is tripping over a cup on the floor. In his panic, he tucks the vial close to his body to prevent it breaking in the fall - but also preventing himself from breaking his face in the fall.

Fucking Merlin’s sweaty ballsack that hurt. He lays on the floor for a moment, the wind knocked out of him and his face aching. Gingerly, he sits up, checking the vial is fine, he then checks his face. He can taste blood in his mouth, and his glasses are broken again. Feels like he bit his tongue.

Sighing, he scoots back and leans against the cabinet again, wiping his mouth with his sleeve. Dumbledore expects him to get the memory. He supposes this is the only way he knows how. Wishing he could use the golden potion to make his life better, instead of doing what Dumbledore tells him to do, he opens the vial and tips it in his mouth.

Fire.

Immediately his entire body feels as though his veins are filled with fire.

Reaching out, he uses the bust to stagger up, something must be wrong. His hand slips when he grabs the tiara instead of the stone bust and he falls backwards into the cabinet behind him. The world begins spinning, and his body is on fire, and with a final scream he disappears from Hogwarts, and tumbles out onto a soft carpet.


Tom Marvolo Riddle is not having a good day. 

His most loyal are utterly insane from spending a decade with dementors. Lucius is loyal only to himself, and while he could be useful at times, his ass kissing was obnoxious as hell. Severus Snape was an unknown - he should be loyal, but some of his choices caused him to doubt. 

And that damnable boy. Something was wrong with him. He knows that the boy isn’t the reason he was defeated, he recognized the ritual circle his mother had drawn up only after becoming a wraith. But for some reason, he was still connected to him. Drawn to him. He would fall into his mind routinely, and when he attempted to possess him - well, he never wanted to do that again. There was something wrong with the boy, his body had so much pain that Tom couldn’t even form a thought. How was the child walking around when his body was malfunctioning like that?

He entered his bedroom, utterly done with being surrounded by people for the day, he needed a long hot bath, and to take his damnable glamour off. It itched. Sometimes he crucio’d his followers just so he could stop thinking about how much it itched. 
They probably deserved it anyway.

Just as he nearly reached his en suite, a humming sound came from the wardrobe by the window. Pausing at the unusual sound, his eyebrows shot up to see a body tumble out of it. 

What.

The.

Fuck.

His wand immediately drawn on the intruder, he quietly stepped forward and then stopped short when it registered what he was seeing. 

Harry Potter. In his bedroom. 

Quickly, silently, he disarmed, silenced, and immobilized the boy. The child was like a cockroach when it came to getting out of situations, he was leaving nothing to chance. 

Examine him closer, he could see the boy was holding something shiny in his left hand. Fury filled him when he realized it was Ravenclaw’s diadem, his horcrux. 

Why did he have this. How did he have it. How did he get into his bedroom behind not only the Malfoy wards, but his own personal wards. 

Why isn’t he at Hogwarts?

What the hell is going on. 


Harry was confused.

He was on fire. Then he was a tornado on fire. 

Then he crashed on something soft, before his body snapped together. He couldn’t make a sound, or move. 

He wished one of these ropes was just a little lower on his back, he had knots from sitting on the floor before. 

He could still see, but only it was blurry and sparkly. 

He had no idea what was going on, but he felt AWESOME. His skin was buzzing, he felt like he could do anything. 

He tried to wiggle, but couldn’t. Then he tried to open his mouth, but it was sealed tight. Settling in with nothing to do but wait, he started to hum. 

A blurry figure came up, looming over him, and he couldn’t help but giggle, something about the figure was making him think of Svengoolie, a tv host Dudley used to sneak out of bed to watch. He continued to hum while waiting for the figure to do, well, anything. 

Suddenly, his mouth was released, and he was singing, “Where did you come from?”

The figure loomed closer, “Where did YOU come from? You are the unwanted guest.”

”Where did you go?”

The figure hesitated, “What - I have been right -“

”Where did you come from -“ “I JUST ASKED-“ “Cotton-eyed Joe”

….

”What the fuck are you talking about Potter?”

”Shhh….you said a swear” Harry sing-songed, his eyes tracking the golden sparkles floating around.

”What is wrong- are you drunk?”

”Hey! I will have you know, I am a paragon of virtue -I never break the rules.”

”I am so su—“

”Except breaking curfew.”

”Well, that’s—“

”And stealing ingredients from Snape’s potion cupboard.”

”I am sure that pis-“

”Stole a car once too. Oh and food. Sometimes money to buy food. Also, once when Umbridge was done torturing me, I snuck back in her office and painted dicks on the walls with muggle paint, and shat in her desk drawer.”

”I don’t even know where to start with - you SHAT in her drawer? What did she do to you?”

”Made me write with a blood quill - lookie- oh…I can’t move. Do you think you could scratch my nose?”


Tom stared down at Potter in confusion. The boy’s eyes were the size of saucers, he kept humming, and his eyes were moving like they were tracking something, but there was nothing there. He seemed utterly unconcerned that he was tied up, and did not seem to know who Tom was, even though he was wearing his naga glamour. 

A blood quill. He would do worse than shit in someone’s desk drawer if they dared try to mar him in such a way. He leaned over to examine the boy’s hand and could see scaring, ‘I must not tell lies.’

Fury began to boil in his stomach. Tom might want to remove the obstacle for his power, but he wouldn’t torture school children.

Well, not now anyway with his sanity back. He supposes he did torture Potter last year.

The boy was now humming, and sticking his tongue out like he was trying to reach his nose. 

Again - What. The. Fuck.

Maybe his brain was addled in whatever process that launched him in his bedroom.

”Missy!”

An elf popped in, ears twitching nervously as she peeked at the incarcerated boy. 

“Yes Master Darky Lord?”

”Fetch Narcissa, tell her to bring anything she would need to diagnose and treat someone.”

She popped away again. 

“If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends” 

Sweet Morgana he was singing again. Tom looked at Potter distatefully before shooting a silencing spell at him again and stepping over to a chair to keep an eye on him. Boys eyes were closed, and his mouth still moving like he hadn’t noticed that he was no longer making a sound.


Narcissa gathered her healer kit and made haste to the Dark Lord’s quarters, concern over what could have harmed him while within her home. 

Upon reaching his door, she knocked, as was courteous, but then went in as it was apparently emergent. She froze momentarily upon seeing his snake-like visage. He did not typically wear the glamour in his quarters, only on raids, or in meetings with the unmarked. 

Then her eyes fell upon the tied up teenager on his bed.

Salazar’s dirty pants. Why is it always Harry Fucking Potter.

“My Lord?”

”He came tumbling out of my wardrobe. I believe his brains might be addled.”

”Addled? My Lord?”

He waved his wand and apparently there had been a silencing spell in place, because suddenly she could hear loud, off key…singing?

”YO I’LL TELL YOU WHAT I WANT WHAT I REALLY REALLY WANT, SO TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT, YOU REALLY—-“

The silencing spell was back in affect, although Potter seemed to be oblivious that no one could hear him. 

“Right. Let me run some diagnostics. We wish to …. Heal him?” She side eyed he Lord. His sanity may be back, but she did not know if that extended to the raven haired teen. 

“Let’s see what we are working with.”

She started with a diagnostic spell that would log all physical and magical injuries, a quill and parchment materializing in air and beginning to scratch away. This could take a few moments, so she then siphoned some blood and added individual drops to various vials for testing to test for illness, inoculations, and potions. Setting those aside to rest for 10 minutes before reading the results, she was surprised to see the quill and parchment still writing. She looked up in alarm at her Lord, to see a similar look of alarm. When the parchment was nearly as tall as she it finally stopped, the quill dematerializing. 

“Well then. That’s unusual.”

She began to read the results, her eyebrows furrowing - at one point she stopped reading from the top and went straight to the bottom, her hand covering her mouth in horror. 

Tom silently held his hand out for the results, and she shakily handed them over.

Starting at the bottom he read: 

  • 16 months, 3 days - spiral fracture, humerus 
  • 17 months- malnutrition, dehydration
  • 17 months, 2 weeks - contusion, right orbital socket
  • 18 months - malnutrition, dehydration, vitamin D deficiency, calcium deficiency 
  • 18 months, 1 week - chemical burns, larynx

The list continued, month after month dehydration, malnutrition, and various deficiencies growing, broken bones, burns, bruises.

Tom thought back briefly to possessing Potter, how much his body hurt. He thought that it was a side effect of the possession or the boy’s mother’s protection - but now he couldn’t help but think that maybe that is just how Potter’s body feels all the time. 

How the hell does he do it?

He looks over at the boy,  who appears to have stopped singing and is now sleepily watching Narcissa pour her test potions on parchment to read the results. Her lips thin as the potion coalesces into words. Sighing, she hands over the results.

Harrison James Potter-Black

Inoculations: 

  • Dragonpox: administered 15.8.1981

Illness:

  • None

Poisons:

  • Basilisk Venom: administered 24.5.1993
  • Phoenix Tears: administered 24.5.1993

Potions:

  • Cupid’s kiss: administered monthly from 5.9.1992-5.6.1993, 10.9.1993-10.6.1994, 6.9.1994-6.6.1995, 15.8.1995-15.6.1996, 2.9.1996-2.4.1997
  • Felix Felicis: administered 21.4.1997

 

Tom sighs. “Should we start with a purge, then move on to healing?”

”My Lord, it would not be wise to purge him of the Felicis, that could cause hemorrhaging. And I am not sure how to purge the venom and tears…it will take time and research. It might be best to leave them be, they could be cancelling each other out. What I recommend is putting him on a regime of nutrient potions, and his inoculations since he somehow didn’t get them at all growing up or at Hogwarts his first year. We should also begin scheduling bone removal and growth over the course of the next month. We cannot vanish too many at a time, or administer skele-gro  more than once a week, but many of his bones have regrown incorrectly repeatedly. We will also need scar cream for the non-curse scars. A potion for his eyesight - I would say I don’t understand why no one has done that yet, but seeing these results I am not surprised.”

”Write the list of potions and balms. I will call Severus, he can brew them for you. Have an elf set Potter up in the adjacent room to mine. I want to keep and eye on him.”

”Yes My Lord.”

She called for Missy, and began instructing her on making up the adjacent room to be suitable for medical care. Tom left the room, trusting Narcissa to handle it and made his way to Lucius study. This could very well change everything.

Chapter 2: Onni onnettomuudessa

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Harry POV

Harry woke up slowly, his head feeling light and floaty. As his eyes drifted open, he could see faint sparkles in the air around his face. Pushing himself up to a sitting position, he stretched, frowning. Something was different. A glimmer caught his eye and he tracked it around for a moment, before his surroundings came into focus, distracting him. This wasn’t his dorm room, or the room at the Dursley’s. This room was large and elegant. He looked down, and smoothed his hands over the  soft cream and pale gold duvet. The curtains around his bed were heavy velvet in a rich chocolate brown, the walls a soft cream and gold pattern with antique furniture throughout the room. 

Another gold glimmer caught his eye and he traced it above his head and then down towards his hands, before it darted across the room. Curious, he carefully climbed out of the bed, smoothing his hands down silky soft midnight blue pajamas. Tip toe he crossed the room and when the glimmer went out the door he followed it. 

Wandering down a hallway, hardly noticing his surroundings, he began to hum a song stuck in his head as he zigged one way and zagged another following the pretty sparkle. 

The sparkle darted suddenly one way to the next and he leapt out to catch it, crashing into someone, and then feeling gravity pull him down the stairs that he was unknowingly at the top of.


 Tom POV

Tom watched the boy leave the room, his eyes darting around at something that Tom could not see. He didn’t even notice Tom sitting on the chaise by the window. Sighing, he followed the strange child out of the room and snorted at what he watched. 

The boy was wandering drunkenly down the hall, occasionally twirling, while singing something. His eyes were still out of focus, tracking the unknown. 

The boy’s singing picked up All the single ladies….all the single ladies…throw your hands up… And just as he reached the top of the stairs, he leapt forward reaching for something above his head. 

Unfortunately, wormtail, the hideous person, just happened to be coming up the steps, just as Harrison jumped, crashing into him. Before Tom could react, the two were tumbling down the stairs. 

He ran after them, after all the bloody potions and healing that boy went through he was not going to die of knock to the head from leaping down the stairs. 

Reaching the bottom of the stairs, he paused, confused. 

Harrison seemed unharmed, sitting on Pettigrew’s chest, scowling at the animagus. 

Pettigrew…was unnaturally still, his head and neck at an even more unnatural angle. 

Tom looked at Harrison in disbelief. 

“Did you just kill Peter Pettigrew by falling down the stairs?”

The dark haired boy finally looked up at him, surprise etched across his features. He took in Tom’s appearance, and he cursed to himself as he was not wearing his glamor at the moment, having forgotten in his curiosity over Harrison’s strange behavior. 

“Tom?”

He rolled his eyes. “Come here child. You are supposed to be in bed healing, not killing my ranks.” He reached for him, and Harrison wrinkled his nose in confusion, but allowed him to assist him in standing, before his eyes darted again looking at something. 

“I would think you would want to kill me, not heal me.” He spoke, even as his eyes continued to bounce around, unfocused. 

“Well, someone needed to heal you, for Salazar’s sake, how the fuck were you walking around?” Tom had Harrison by the elbow, and assisted him up the stairs, his arm around his back protectively to prevent another tumble. When they reached the top of the stairs, he cast a patronus. A flowing panther prowled around them then sat once it determined there was no danger. 

“Go to Severus and Narcissa. Harrison has awakened.”

Harrison looked up at the taller man, “What about the rat?”

I will worry about the rat, you just need to get back in bed, and allow Narcissa to examine you. You have undergone intensive healing the past few weeks, it wouldn’t do to undo all that work.”

Harrison froze and his eyes finally focused, meeting Tom’s eyes. “I don’t hurt anymore.” His voice was shocked, and he brought his fingers up to his face, flexing them, then counting on his toes.

”Nothing hurts…and look, my fingers, they move all the way now!” He thrust his hands in Tom’s face closing and opening his fingers. 

Tom’s face closed off, but inside he was furious. He may have tried to kill the boy in his insanity, but he never would have done to him what Dumbledore had allowed. And he would never have harmed him were he sane, as he is now. Harrison should not feel amazement that he is able to close his fingers properly. 

Talking a deep breath, he tucked the boy into the bed again, just as Narcissa and Severus both walked in the room, Narcissa with her healer bag, and Severus with a potions case. 

Severus raised his eyebrow at Tom, “I saw the staircase.”

“Yes, an unfortunate accident it seems.”

Narcissa POV

Narcissa ignored the two men as they spoke quietly to one another, and began casting her diagnoses spells, gathering blood for the testing once more. 

“How are you feeling Harrison?” She spoke calmly to the confused teenager.

”Uhm, a little lost. Not sure why I am not dead. Baffled that people who hate me are making me better, when people who care about me have blown this stuff off for years.”

She looked at him, her lips tight. “It is unfortunate that no one removed you from the situation you were in before. Or that you were even placed there to begin with. You will not be going back however. Now, how do you feel physically?” 

His eyes were wide, guarded but hopeful. “I actually feel wonderful. I don’t think I have ever felt this good before.” His eyes darted to the side, tracking something. Narcissa set the vials to the side, setting a timer with her wand. Looking into his face, she asked “Harrison, what do you keep looking at?”

His eyes dragged to hers, before quickly darting to the side again. “The sparkles. Is it magic? Or some sort of creature? I keep seeing them.”

”Sparkles?”

”Yes, the golden glimmers and sparkles floating around.” He pointed at the air the her side. 

“I see, interesting. I will have to look into that, I don’t see any sparkles myself. May I examine your eyes?”

He turned his face to her and nodded. She cast a diagnostic, and then using a lumos, she examined his pupils. The diagnostic came back healthy, but his pupillary  response was odd. When the light shone, his pupils did not contract, remaining blown. His gemstone green iris a thin ring around the black. This kind of response she would expect to see with someone on pain relieving potions, but Harrison hadn’t had any in over 24 hours. 

Turning to her potion vials, she saw the results were completed and finished the steps to get her parchment. Furrowing her brow, she looked up at Tom and Severus. Tom looked back at her, eyebrows raised, and gestured at her to join them.

”I will be right back Harrison, I am reviewing your results now.” She pulled the duvet up further on him, then stroked his brow. His eyes grew larger and began to look shiny. 

Stepping over to Tom and Severus, she held out the results to them.

”Somehow, he still has the Felicis in his system. That should not be possible.”

Severus just sighed, put upon. “The boy cannot seem to be normal in any way, shape, or form. We cannot purge this from his system considering what else he has floating around, and considering the volatile nature of the potion.”

Tom looked thoughtful for a moment, looking at the boy then back towards the hall that led to the stairwell. “I believe the potion is still in effect, not just in his system.”

Severus raised an eyebrow but remained silent. 

“He moved as though drunk, singing and twirling down the hallway, looking at something, before trying to jump at the top of the stairs, crashing into peter, causing them both to fall. He was unharmed, but peter - well you saw.”

Narcissa frowned, “Is this permanent? Could it harm him? He is seeing sparkles, he calls them, and his pupils are blown as though he were high on pain relievers of the highest intensity. The potion is known to cause recklessness, and he was not exactly cautious to begin with…” She drifted off, concern filling her for the boy that she now felt intense compassion for. 

“We have had him here for weeks, we will continue to keep him and observe. We may have to make adjustments to ensure his safety. Severus, has the old man made any progress?”

Severus rolled his eyes, grimacing. “He finally called an Order meeting 3 days ago, and informed them that Harrison is missing. He had spent the previous 3 weeks searching everywhere for him in secret. It is bound to get to the public soon however that he is missing, especially as the end of the school year approaches.”

”Were you able to get his belongings?”

”Yes, though they are hidden in the Room of Requirement at the moment, I am going through everything to remove all of the spellwork. He had an unholy number of tracking charms, and compulsion charms on every belonging in his trunk.” Severus glared at the floor. 

“Once you have finished, I would like everything brought here. He hasn’t fought us on staying, and I am hoping he will continue to be cooperative.”

”He will need new clothing, most of what he owns are rags. He also does not have near enough the correct books for a muggle raised student. Considering he seems to have everything he owns in his trunk, I do not believe he left books at his summer residence. I am worried that he is unaware of the additional materials. I do not believe he has even done his own school shopping since his second year.” 

Tom rubbed Severus’ back, nodding, then looking at Narcissa. “Please order the introductory books for muggleborns, as well as the heir training books. While he is waiting for his belongings, we can give those to him to start. Also, contact your tailor, we will get him fitted for new clothing privately.”

She nodded, relieved that the boy would continue to be cared for. “Yes Tom. I will go to do that now. He needs food and rest, I will send an elf with something light for him to eat.”

Tom nodded at her and turned back to Severus. She moved back to the bed where Harrison’s eyes were half lidded, his breathing becoming even. 

“Harrison, I know you are sleepy, but I would like you to eat darling. I am sending up some soup and bread for you. I would like you to eat at least half of it.” He gazed at her, his eyes focused, and a look she couldn’t decipher. 

“Yes Mrs. Malfoy. Thank you for taking care of me. I’ll be good.” He spoke softly, for the first time it seemed he was fully aware of his surroundings. She smiled at him. “Of course you are good darling. I am going now, I need to take care of somethings, the elf will be up shortly. After you eat, you can sleep. I will be back to check on you later.” 

He nodded at her, his eyes never leaving her face.

She tucked him in once more, stroking the hair from his face, then stepping out of the room.

She would set Albus’ beard on fire before she ever let him near Harrison again.

Notes:

A/N
FINNISH Onni onnettomuudessa: (good) luck in bad luck

Chapter 3: Chanceux dans sa malchance

Summary:

Tom discusses betrothals with Harry

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Tom POV

The boy was just staring at him, aside from the occasional flicker of his eye tracking the so-far unknown sparkles, he had been staring at him silently for 2 minutes and 46 seconds. It doesn’t seem like a lot, except to a person who finds eye contact uncomfortable. 

Hm. Maybe that is why he is so brutal with legilimency. 

“Harrison, do you understand everything I have gone over with you?”

The boy’s eyes focused on him again. He nodded slowly. 

“You performed a ritual that made you go round the bend. You tried to kill me when you were insane because it made sense at the time, but it no longer does.”

Tom struggled not to cover his face with his hands. Or strangle the boy. They had been talking for over 3 hours, and that is all he drew from the conversation.

Taking a deep breath, “Yes. I did that. And I am genuinely apologetic for the loss of your parents, I regret my actions. But, this is important, do you understand everything we reviewed in those papers?”

Harrison continued to stare at him. Then gave a half hearted shrug. “Dumbledore knew I was being abused and let it happen. And he stole from me. And he and Molly and Ginny are trying to potion me so I will marry Ginny and they can get access to more than my trust vault.”

His eyes flickered away again. Tom gave in and pinched the bridge of his nose. He didn’t understand how he could be so calm knowing he had been so utterly betrayed. He is no longer shocked that Harrison was so willing to live here with him, the boy has had no dependable adults in his life whatsoever, that even the murderer of his parents is an improvement.

“Harrison, you understand how awful that contract is correct? You will lose any and all agency if it is fulfilled. Severus, Narcissa, and I are trying to find a way out, but we are running out of time. We could take….permanent…measures, but I am unsure you would approve.” Tom watched his face carefully. He wasn’t above killing the Weasley chit to get Harrison out of what was a glorified slave contract, but he knew that the teen would not approve of that.

Harrison’s eyes began to glaze over, and he started to hum. Tom froze, then summoned parchment. He and Severus were trying to track symptoms of the Felicis bonding in Harrison’s system. It seemed to follow a pattern, Harrison was typically lucid, if aggravating, but he would become unfocused, sing like a drunkard in a tavern, wander around like an even more drunk toddler, then complete some feat that should seriously cause bodily harm to him, but somehow result in something positive. 

Yesterday, he wandered out of the private, warded, living areas into the public portion of the house where some of the more fanatical, and unhinged death eaters were. He completely ignored Bellatrix’ presence, singing some song about a secret tunnel, which got Bellatrix up in arms believing he was leading the Order through a secret tunnel. She proceeded to cast a nasty cutting curse at Harrison, who was still completely unaware she was even there, when he saw Nagini, leaned down to coo at her, resulting in the hex striking Nagini’s tail.

Bellatrix lost a leg, and it’s currently unknown if she will survive, Narcissa had to place her in a healing coma.

Meanwhile, Harrison found a new best friend who follows him around while he calls her a “Pretty scaly baby” and “boops her snoot” to her delight.

Tom needed to keep Harrison from his death eaters. 

He may also need Severus to brew him more calming draughts. 

Watching the boy, he began to sway, and was still humming, but had not stood or moved away from the desk and the stack of papers in front of him. The Goblins had pulled a complete accounting of his assets and family legal documentation and he and Tom had spent hours going through it. 

Harrison’s eyes flickered, tracking something, then proceeded to sneeze violently, hitting his face on the desk, and scattering everything everywhere. 

Tom just dropped his face in his hands. 

This must be karma. That, or he died, and this was hell. 

Without looking up, he conjured a handkerchief, holding it to Harrison, who silently took it and held it to his bleeding nose that was dripping all over one of the pages. 

Sighing, Tom picked up the parchment to see if he could cleanse it, or if it would need to be replaced, but it then flashed gold in his hand. 

He looked at the page in shock, then at Harrison. 

“Harrison” His voice was strangled “Do you happen to know if you are a carrier?”

The boy looked at him. “A what?”

”A bearer. A man who is genetically and biologically of getting pregnant.”

Harrison’s eyes just blinked at him. “Men can get pregnant?”

Tom bit back a scream. “What the fuck are they teaching at Hogwarts.”

Harrison snorted, “Clearly not sexual education. How would I know if I am a carrier? I don’t have girl bits.”

He took a deep breath, before he shook the teen. “It’s a simple blood test. May I perform it?”

Harrison shrugged, but at least his eyes were clear. Tom cast a patronus, requesting Severus to bring the required materials. 

“Why would that matter. Ginny’s a girl. Would being a carrier mean I can’t get her pregnant?”

”That is actually, exactly correct. You would not be able to conceive a child with a woman if you were a carrier.”

”Relief that.” Harrison finally looked engaged with the conversation.

Tom looked at him inquiringly. “Not interested in children?”

”Oh, I want loads of kids. Huge family. I am just super gay. Like, super, super gay. I cannot tell you how many times I have thought about my quidditch captain, or Krum, or Cedric - but you killed him, shame that he was pretty. And a nice bloke. Actually, you were proper fit when you were younger. Old now though.” Harrison was grinning at him cheekily, the handkerchief hanging from one of his nostrils for some reason, and Tom clenched his fists to keep from shaking him, again. The teen was purposely trying to rile him up.

”Right. So. If you are a carrier, that would simplify things. Why is the handkerchief in your nose. That is disgusting.”

Harrison shrugged again. “Can’t heal it can I? Keep the hanky there til it stops bleeding and I’m golden.”

Tom threw up in his mouth a little. How had he ever thought this walking disaster would be his downfall. 

Actually, all things considered, if he were ever to be a danger to the boy, he would probably burp and make a volcano explode causing Tom’s doom. 

When had his life become like this. 

A quiet, warm presence arrived and Tom was relieved Severus was here. He needed a voice of reason. 

“I’ve brought what was requested. Might I know why?” Severus’ deep bass rumbled pleasantly as he stood staring at the two.

”The walking chaos demon activated an older betrothal contract. We need verification that the conditions are met, and then the one for Miss Weasley can be invalidated.”

Harrison perked up, “Really? If I can get knocked up I don’t have to marry her? Wait - will I have to marry someone worse? Or can I pick? If I get to pick, Charlie Weasley hands down. Man is fit, has arms like Christmas hams have you seen?”

Tom buried his face in his hands. 

Severus raised an eyebrow at word vomit coming from his young ward. 

“Was this an event like we have witnessed previously?”

Tom sighed, pulling out the parchment that he logged his observations on and handed it to the other man who read it over, both eyebrows raising to his hairline.

”Interesting. It appears the phenomenon is not limited to when he boy is in imminent danger. I would be curious if it extends to any scenario he wants changed, or if it is only in cases that his mental, emotional, psychological, or physical wellbeing is at risk.” Not even looking up, he waved his wand, banishing the horrendous handkerchief from Harrison’s nose, and with a soft crack and an “Oi” from Potter, his nose was healed.

He loved the efficiency of this man. 

“I will need 5 drops of blood in this vial, then we will be able to get the results. As for who we would curse to be your lifelong partner, I have not read the contract so I would not know, nor do I care.” Severus stated all business, although Tom could see the barest hint of warmth in his eyes. 

Severus was attached. Narcissa was attached. Even he was bloody attached to the menace to humanity sitting in front of him. 

While Severus performed the test, Tom reviewed the contract. “It appears it is an older Black betrothal contract, that is specific to male carriers who are heirs. They must bond a male partner, to ensure the continuance of the line. It is open to whom you can bond with, but you must bond within one year of your majority, and cannot bond with another heir, as the Black name must take precedence. The conditions set are reasonable, you would retain your agency in career and finances, as well as remain as head of house - this is actually rather modern all things considered.” Tom looked up at Harrison who was watching him with interest. “I can have Narcissa assist in drawing up profiles of appropriate matches for you to choose from, and we could start having betrothal interviews. You would have final say of course.”

Harrison beamed at this. Tom had realized that nothing made him happier than being given choices. 

“Never thought I would hope to get knocked up, but cheers.”

”And on that note, you are in fact a carrier. Congratulations.” Severus voice was deadpan, but Tom knew he was relieved as well. 

“Cool. So, Charlie Weasley, yeah?” Harrison was smirking at him. 

“Do you really wish to bond someone just because they are ‘fit’?”

”Charlies cool though - wrestles dragons and what not.” Harrison had a look on his face and Tom braced himself for whatever horrendous thing he was about to say. “I’d like to wrestle HIS dragon.” He waggled his eyebrows.

”Oh come off it Potter, you are a virgin. You wouldn’t know what to do with a dragon.” Tom nearly swallowed his tongue at Severus’ dry response, and the pout on Harrison’s face. 

“Anyway, I will speak to Narcissa, request she come up with some preliminary profiles. Please, take some time to write out things that are actually important to you, and do not dare write something so vulgar as dragon wrestling, as Narcissa will be reading it.” Tom gave Harrison a stern look, who actually looked abashed. With a flick of his wand, all the papers were neatly stacked, and he withdrew the Weasley girl’s contract as well as the  Black contract. “I will speak with Narcissa, and then I will go file the updates with the Goblins. Now, it’s time for you to eat, if Missy tells me you ate everything on the tray, I might be persuaded to allow the elves to make you treacle tart tonight.”

Harrison beamed at him again, making his chest feel warm. Clearing his throat, he rose to leave the room. 

“Thank you. You know, for taking care of me.” Harrison blushed red and picked at his sleeve. 

Tom wasn’t sure what to say, but Severus stepped in, gently placing his hand on Harrison’s shoulder. “You deserve to be taken care of.”

Tom pretended not to hear Harrison sniffle as he left the room.

Notes:

This incident brought to you by the author sneezing so hard she hit her face on her steering wheel, and almost hitting a fire hydrant.
Nothing was harmed except the little dignity I had remaining.

Chapter 4: Удача не была бы без помощи несчастья

Summary:

Order meetings, betrothal discussions, and our dark lord’s heart grows two sizes

Notes:

I genuinely have no idea who I am pairing with Harry - I think I am just gonna write until something happens.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Severus leaned against the wall at Grimmauld place, listening to the arguments between the members. As usual, the arguments were surrounding the location of the golden-boy-with-liquid-luck-in-his-veins. His face remained passive,  but internally he was ignoring the irritating screeches coming from the Weasley matriarch, and instead reviewing the betrothal options for Harrison.  

To the boys devastation, Charles Weasley was not an option, feelers having been put in place, but the fact finding found that the man was asexual and aromantic and intended to live his entire life on a dragon reserve. Narcissa was able to determine a list of appropriate matches however, leaving Severus and Tom to narrow down the list to three. He hoped one would be acceptable to the boy. 

The ancient house elf popping in on top of the table the order was seated around, interrupted Severus’ inner musings. The elf was grinning maliciously,  and he snapped his fingers freezing everyone but Severus in place. Severus had to bite back a snort when he saw that Albus was frozen with his mouth hanging open,  having just popped a lemon drop in it.

”Intruders in House Black! Traitors must leave or,” the elf coughed, stood up straight, and placed his hands on his hips, “the badass elf Kreacher will fuck shit up.”

He looked rather excited to fuck shit up. Snapping, the order members were released, and immediately they all began shouting. 

“ENOUGH!” Albus roared, leaning over the table.  He turned and looked at Kreacher. “My dear elf, the previous Lord Black Sirius gave the order the use of the house.”

Kreacher snarled at the old man. “I is not you’s elf. And bad master Sirius is dead. Kreacher has permission to remove pests from great house.”

The Weasley twins were cackling in the corner, trading candy while they watched the adults lose their minds, shouting over each other. Molly reached out to grab Kreacher, and he popped out of her reach, reappearing on the top of the china cabinet. He danced from foot to foot, snapping his fingers, and suddenly Molly was bald, covered in boils, and her skin a sickly yellow.

”KREACHER IS FUCKING SHIT UP!” The mad elf cackled, and suddenly each order member was under fire. Albus’ beard was removed, and wasn’t his face horrifying to look at without it,  Tonks was covered in what looked like dragon dung, Mundungus was slithering across the table, his snail body purple and his shell orange. 

Snape felt the house shake, the magic becoming heavier, and realized the wards were about to eject the unwanted members. He calmly turned, walking out the door into the street, and summoned a camera, and then waited patiently. 

Two minutes later, order members were tumbling on the street.  Severus snapped several pictures, especially of Albus who was not only beardless,  but his robes turned Slytherin green, and bright silver words flashing on them “I’m a batshit old has-been who lets children be abused.”

Pocketing the camera, he withdrew his wand and apparated away. It had been a rather productive meeting after all.


Tom was sitting with Harrison having tea.  Harrison had become much more lucid over the past two weeks, now the potion in his system only reacted sometimes. Tom and Severus continued to monitor him, but it seemed he would not have long term negative side effects. 

Not that that stopped him from acting like the chaos demon that he is. This morning they were able to meet with the goblins privately at home, and Harrison was able to take his Heir rings - it almost seemed silly, since he would take the Lordship rings in just six weeks, but it provided an additional protections and Tom did not want to take any risks. 

Currently, he was eyeing  the younger man, who was being suspiciously quiet and well behaved. 

“When Severus returns from the order meeting, we will review the betrothal choices -  once you approve of the choices we will schedule the meetings so you can make a final decision. “

”Are you sure  Charlie Weasley can’t be one of the options?”

Tom pinched his nose. “Charlie Weasley has less interest in romantic dalliances than you do in his sister.”

Harrison sighed. “It’s always the hot ones.”

Before Tom could reply, Severus strode into the room, his cloak billowing, his eyes staring at Harrison. Tom sighed. “What did you do?”

Severus stood there, arms crossed, then glared at Tom.  “Did you allow him to take his heirships?”

Tom was confused about what Severus could be upset about. “We met the goblins this morning.”

Severus turned to Harrison, who burst out laughing. “The bad ass elf Kreacher?” He spoke flatly. Tom was even more confused.

Harrison cackled then called out, “Bad Ass Elf Kreacher!”

An ancient elf popped in the room,  and Tom was mildly horrified at its appearance. The thing was wild, sharp teeth and a torn ear, wearing some sort of leather armored tunic. Looking closer at the sheen and pattern of the leather, Tom’s eyes widened.

”Is that elf wearing Basilisk skin armor?”

Snape palmed his face, his hair swinging forward, and Harrison jumped up on the settee he had been sitting on. “You were already able to get it? Awesome!” He punched the air in enthusiasm.  

“Of course I gets snakey skin for Demon Heir Black.” The elf sniffed, as if offended Harrison doubted him.

“What is going on?” Tom’s patience had ended.  Harrison continued to laugh, now laying on the floor, Nagini wrapping around him and bumping her nose against his forehead.

”Apparently, your chaos demon child’s first act as heir, was to instruct  his elf to, and I quote, “fuck shit up”. Which Kreacher loudly announced on the table, before proceeding to do just that.” Severus spoke calmly,  raising his eyebrow at Tom.

”Why is he my child when he does something insane?” Tom did not whine.

Severus just gave him an unamused look. “Seven. Horcruxes.”

Tom pinched the bridge of his nose. “Right.” Then raised his head, eyebrows furrowed. “Wait, he isn’t either of our child.”

Tom’s realization just made Harrison laugh harder, while petting and cooing at Nagini. “Forget I’m not your kid? Not like you healed me, fed me, clothed me, protected me,  and are helping me with my betrothal.”

Tom froze. 

He was acting like Harrison’s parent.

He was parenting his prophesied enemy.

His prophesied enemy was currently stuck in Nagini’s coils as she demanded “more boops.”

Tom stared Harrison for a long moment. He had never thought about having children before. And, he did rather like this one.

”Severus -“

”No.”

”What?”

”Whatever you are thinking, is likely insane. So, no.” Severus spoke calmly, pouring himself tea.”

“You haven’t even heard what it is I want.”

Severus sighed, setting tea down, absently reaching down and smoothing Harrison’s hair down. “Go on then.”

”Let’s adopt Harrison.”

”What??” Harrison struggled to sit up, but Nagini dropped her full weight on him, leaving him caught in her coils.

Severus pursed his lips, his head tilted thoughtfully. “I am not opposed to the idea.”

Harrison ceased struggling. “You aren’t?”

”I find you are not as…reprehensible…as I once thought.”

Harrison beamed at them both. “You both really want me?”

Tom stared at the boy for a long moment. We are alike. I know you, understand you. You are mine.

Harrison just smiled at Tom, responding with his lisping accent,  No one has ever wanted me before. I would like to be yours.

Nagini raised her head and looked at Tom. Master is stupid. Snakeling is Nagini’s. Tom just rolled his eyes.

Severus spoke up then. “By the way - Tom, I think you will enjoy developing the pictures on this.” He tossed a camera to him.

Harrison wrinkled his nose. “Gross. I don’t need to know about my dads’ sex lives.”

Tom looked horrified and Severus just sighed, rubbing his face. “It is not sex pictures you menace. In fact, you will like them as well.”

Before Tom could say or do anything, the feral elf popped in, snatched the camera, and popped away again, cackling  about fucking shit up.

Severus stared at the empty space. “Well. That can’t be good. Harrison, what exactly did you instruct your elf to do?”

Harrison looked up sleepily from his nest in Nagini’s coils. “I didn’t instruct him to do anything.”

Severus looked unimpressed. “The elf’s new vocabulary and pranking, suggests otherwise.”

Harrison gave him a stubborn look. “I didn’t instruct him to do anything.”

Tom raised his eyebrows at that.

”I made a deal with him.”

Tom pinched his nose. “You made a deal.  With a house elf.”

Harrison refused to look at them, gently petting Nagini. “Yup. Kreacher is a bad ass and a good elf. So, I made a deal.”

”And the terms of this deal?” Severus spoke softly.

”Well….I am going to be the Black Lord. And have Black babies I guess.” He scrunched his face up - he still had trouble wrapping his head around the fact that he would be getting pregnant. “Kreacher likes taking care of babies.”

”Harrison, what did you do.”

”I just happened to mention how pissed off I am at the headmaster. And Molly. And Ginny. And Ron. And how I wished I could fuck shit up for them. Kreacher wants to be the elf assigned to helping with my future babies. You know he helped care for Regulus? And, well, he is a vindictive little shit isn’t he?”

Tom and Severus shared a look before Severus spoke. “Let’s table irresponsible bargains with house elves for now. We have three candidates for your betrothal.  Once you approve, we will set up meetings with each in the next few days. It’s best we have it signed as soon as possible.”

”Ok. Can someone help me?” Harrison spoke up from where Nagini had him completed tangled in her coils, his arms flailing, while she tried to pat him down muttering about wiggly snakelings who needed naps.

Tom snorted and reached out to unwind her, when soft footsteps sounded on the floor. He looked up to see a barefoot blonde girl wander into the sitting room, a flower crown made of….nightshade…on her head. He raised his wand quickly, “Who are you and how did you get in here?”

The girl turned toward him, her eyes flicking to his briefly before wandering around the room again. 

“Luna?” Harrison spoke, sounding confused. 

“Hello Harrison. You look much better than before. Your fingers look like they are quite functional now.” The girls dreamy voice carried softly. Severus leaned back against his chair, eyes closed, and wordlessly summoned a bottle of fire whiskey. 

“Uh, yeah. Thanks Luna. I had some healing.”

”That’s good. It’s been a long time coming.”

”Luna, I am very happy to see you, but how are you here?  And why?”

”You haven’t written to Viktor in over a month. He was worried.”

”Viktor?  Really?”  Harrison popped up, struggling to push Nagini’s coils off him. He succeeded in freeing his arms, but his lower half was still solidly wrapped up.

Tom still stood there wand out, eyes narrowed. “Harrison, stay. Luna? How did you know he was here and how did you get in.  I wont ask again.”

The girl looked at him, her head tilted, and Tom had the uncomfortable sensation that she was reading his soul.   “The flittering soul-harpies told me. It was important that I bring a letter to him before he meets the other candidates.  And I wanted to make sure his new family was making him happy.”

She turned then to step lightly towards Nagini, gently stroking her scales.  “You are quite beautiful.  You are a good mother to Harrison.”

Severus was drinking straight from the bottle at this point, and Tom just gave up, putting his wand away then sitting down. 

“So - you have a letter for me?” Harrison spoke hopefully towards the blonde girl. 

“No. I have a letter for your fathers.”  She reached into the band of her skirt, pulling out a parchment envelope with a black seal, absentmindedly handing it to Tom. 

Tom, still suspicious, cast detection spells on it before opening it. He read through it once, then again,  his eyebrows raising, then silently handed it to his increasingly drunk husband. 

Severus took the letter and began to read it, rolled his eyes, and set it down.

”It seems someone would like to throw their wand in the circle for your betrothal.”

Harrison’s hands stilled over Nagini’s scales. “Who?”

At the question Severus rolled his eyes so hard, Tom feared he would lose them. “Viktor Krum, your pen pal.”


Breakfast the next day was quiet. Harrison was nervously playing with his food, Severus was nursing coffee and a hangover, Tom was reading over the ledgers for Harrison’s houses, and Luna was swinging her feet while popping strawberries in her mouth.  

“Harrison, the food goes in your mouth, not in circles on your plate.” Tom spoke absently.

Harrison huffed, but scooped some egg on his toast, and then chewed obnoxiously loud while looking at Tom. Tom just scowled at him, then cast a spell that snapped his mouth shut. Harrison chewed furiously while glaring. The silent back and forth was interrupted by the Daily Prophet delivery. 

Severus opened the paper, and promptly knocked over his coffee cup spilling it in his lap. Tom leaned over to glance at the front page, then grabbed it from his husband,  staring. 

Above a photograph of Dumbledore, sprawled on the street, his robes flashing the words “I’m a barmy old man” and “I allow children to be abused” was the headline:

Disgraced ex-Supreme Mugwump and Chief Warlock Spotted Drunken on the Streets of London

By Rita Skeeter

Tom scanned the article, which was gossipy trash, but the photo of the headmaster ass over cauldron was priceless. He was going to frame it. And maybe send Skeeter a fruit basket. Then he looked up - “Severus is this a photograph you took?”

Severus’ head was in his hands and he just nodded. Tom handed the paper to Harrison, who promptly fell off his chair cackling. 

“Bad Ass Elf Kreacher!!” He shouted. Tom needed to remind him elves did not require shouting. The ancient elf popped in grinning ferrally, his armor now including basilisk hide slippers and a hat protecting his ears. The blasted elf was wearing thousands of galleons in basilisk skin.

“Yes, Master Demon Heir?”

”Good work Kreacher!”

Kreacher preened at the compliment. “Does Demon Master have boxxy?”

At the question, Harrison looked somewhat shifty, but nodded quickly.  “In my room.” The elf grinned and popped away.

Tom stared at Harrison.  “Boxxy of what?”

Harrison looked around the room, sipping his tea, not making eye contact. “Just ordered some stuff. You know.”

”Stuff.”

”Yes. Stuff.”

”What sort of stuff?”

Harrison looked at him then. “I’m not telling if you are just going to tell me no.”

Tom closed his eyes and counted. This was about to be his child.  Who was nearly an adult. He would not curse his child. “Just. What is it.”

Harrison tilted his head and quickly said, “Enoughdragonandthestraldungtofilltheheadmaster’squartersandoffice.”

This was apparently too much for Severus who snorted into his coffee cup. Tom bit back a chuckle and took a deep drink of his tea. “I see. Well. Have fun.”

Severus finished his coffee and stood. “Be ready in the sitting room in one hour. Goblin Goldfist will be arriving to perform. The blood adoption, as well notarize the betrothal paperwork. Everything will be filed today. Do not be late, wear dress robes, and for Salazar’s sake, do something about nest on your head.  We did buy you brushes for a reason.”

”Oi, it’s not that bad.”  Harrison looked offended. 

“I’ll help you with your hair Harrison.” Luna spoke up.

Tom looked at the girl, “How long will you be here?”

Luna gazed at Tom absently. “Daddy is in Canada looking for the Ug Wug. He wont return for another month.”

”Delightful.”

”Yes, I thought it was.” She smiled at Tom, then Harrison.


Severus, Tom,  and Harrison stood at three points in the ritual circle,  Luna standing as witness to the side, and Goldfist chanting. Goldfist handed a bronze goblet with the adoption potion, to Tom, who drank from it,  then Severus, then finally passing it to Harrison. After Harrison drank from it, Goldfist chanted faster and three golden lights entwined the three. At the crescendo of the chant,  the pressure in the room popped, and the golden bonds flashed, before everything was still. 

Goldfist brought out a parchment. “Three drops for your new birth certificate.” Harrison held his hand out and Tom cut his index finger, letting three drops fall before wandlessly healing him. 

Harrison James Potter-Black-Prince-Slytherin

Mother: Lily Potter née Evans

Father: James Potter

Father:  Severus Snape-Prince (adopted)

Father: Corvinus Thomas Gaunt-Slytherin (adopted)

Harrison looked at the parchment, then at Tom. “Why does it show this as your name?”

”I had it legally changed. If I want to claim my seat on the Wizengamot,  I need a legal identity that wont be arrested on sight.”  Tom said smugly. 

“And you chose Corvinus?”  Harrison snickered.

Tom just narrowed his eyes at his new son. Goldfist cleared his throat and laid out parchmentwork. “The adoption is complete, our last thing to complete today is the betrothal paperwork. The bonding must occur before your 18th birthday.”

Tom nodded, “We will plan so you are able to complete your final year of schooling, and the bonding will take place the first week after you graduate. Viktor is completing his final contracted year with Bulgaria, and is looking to work in England once the contract is complete.”

Harrison smiled to himself, only grimacing a little when the blood quill cut his name into his hand. Immediately after signing, Severus took his hand, wrapping it in a dittany soaked bandage. He murmured, “I am working on a balm to remove curse scars for you, it will just take some time.” Harrison smiled up at him. 

Goldfist gathered the signed parchmentwork. “Congratulations on your adoption and your betrothal.”  He and Tom stepped away to discuss business further, including payment for the home visit. 

“I need to complete brewing wolfsbane for the wolf, I will be in the potions lab for the next few hours.” Severus stood, straightening his robes.  

“May I watch?” Harrison asked. He learned so much from the Prince’s potions journal,  he wanted to see him work for real.

Severus looked at him for a long moment before nodding. “You will touch nothing, but you may ask questions if you are respectful and quiet.” Harrison nodded vigorously.


Harrison sat on a stool where he could observe the process but not be in the way. He looked over the ingredients in the bottles around him, admiring the glow of the ashwinder eggs in a jar.

”How do you know how many times to stir?”  He asked as he absentmindedly picked up the ashwinder eggs. 

Severus didn’t answer at first, very carefully adding the juice of sopophorous beans one at a time. Harrison waited patiently when something shiny caught his eye.  He tracked it without moving, watching it dart around the jar in his hands. He started humming as he moved the jar back and forth, watching the shimmer chase it.

”Don’t go round tonight…” He sang softly, focusing on the jar in his hands. Severus looked up in alarm, but Harrison was standing,  moving the jar back and forth quickly, shaking the eggs inside. 

“It’s bound to take your life…” Harrison’s eyes chased the shimmer, moving towards it,  his hands fumbling with the jar, the lid coming loose. 

“Harrison, stop - stand still.”  Severus spoke up reaching out to stop his new son.  Harrison jerked out of his reach, tripping backwards over his robe, and dumping 3 cracked ashwinder eggs into the cauldron.  Severus caught Harrison, pulling him away from the rocking cauldron,  snatching the jar of eggs from him and setting them on a table. 

“There’s a bad moon rising.” Harrison mumbled, his eyes unfocused. Severus stared at the potion that was boiling violently a moment ago,  but was stilling,  the color changing from blue,  lightening to a pale glowing white.  

“Harrison, are you alright?” He spoke softly, stroking the younger man’s hair.  

“Mm tired.” Came the slurred answer, Harrison’s head leaning against Severus’ chest. Severus nodded, casting his patronus,  requesting Tom come get their son.

Moments later Tom came down, worry coloring his eyes. “Is he alright?”

”He’s fine,  just tired. He had another incident.”  Severus gestured towards the changed  wolfsbane,  if it even was that anymore. Tom walked over to the cauldron, examining it closely.  “I’ll take him to  lay down, and leave you to figure out whatever the demon has done.” Severus nodded gratefully,  handing Harrison over.


15 hours later

Severus sat shellshocked at the parchment covered table in front of him, a dozen vials of the moonlight colored potion in a row.

”The menace created a cure for lycanthropy.” 

Notes:

Удача не была бы без помощи несчастья -Luck would not be without the help of misfortune (Russian proverb)

I guess Luna happened and now we know who Harrison paired with XD

Chapter 5: The heavy hand of fate, the gods smile upon you

Summary:

Some birthday tooth-rotting-fluff

Notes:

This chapter did not go anywhere I thought it would, I had plot and chaos planned, but apparently really wanted Harry to have a birthday party instead.
And maybe just a touch of chaos. Just a pinch.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Harry stood in front of the mirror in his room, twisting to see how his robes fit. Sighing, he tugged off the robes, and tried on the next set. Behind him, his door opened, and light footsteps danced across the floor. 

“I think the deep red robes would suit you.” Luna’s musical voice spoke, as she handed him the lightweight, fitted robes.  He shrugged his blue robes off, and pulled on the red ones she handed him. He wore black breaches tucked into dragon hide boots, and a slim fitted white shirt under the robes. 

“You look wonderful Harry.” Luna bounced on her toes, her fingers working through his curls, making the chaos look artful. 

“I haven’t seen Viktor since the tournament, I am a bit nervous. I know we already signed the papers, but what if he changes his mind?” He chewed his lip in worry. 

Luna, in an uncharacteristic move of solemnity, turned Harry to face her, cupping his cheeks. “Harry, you and Viktor are going to have a long and happy marriage, filled with many children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. You will be beloved, just as you deserve.” She leaned forward, kissing his nose softly, then turned and began digging through the box of jewelry that his new fathers kept adding too. 

Harry just stared at her for a moment, happiness filling his chest at her words,  but then some of those words registered.

”Many?” His voice squeaked. “How many is many? Luna?”


Tom waited in the floo room for their guests. He and Severus had completed renovating and decorating their new manor, just in time for Harry’s birthday. They kept the invitations to just a few people, seeing as his true identity was a secret. It had taken having a luncheon with the Longbottom matriarch and Severus, to explain that they had adopted Harry, after discovering how neglected he was, and that no, he was not missing, he had been under a healer’s care to resolve all of his health issues. 

Madam Longbottom had been thoroughly enraged that her grandson’s godbrother had been so ill treated, and stiffly expressed suspicious thanks to Severus for ensuring his wellbeing. Tom had no doubt in his mind that the woman was only coming with her grandson to ensure that Harry truly was being treated well. 

The floo flashed, and then Viktor was stepping through, casually, wandlessly removing any trace of soot from his person. Tom eyed him critically, noting the neat dark green robes, and straight posture. He bit back a snort, realizing that Harry will enjoy Viktor’s ‘arms like hams’. Viktor then spotted Tom, and stepped forward, bowing shallowly from the waist. “Well met, Lord Slytherin.”

Tom inclined his head. “Well met, Scion Krum. You may call me Thomas, considering you will be family this time next year.”

Krum’s dark eyes crinkled. “Please call me Viktor.” He stepped forward. “Thank you, for taking care of Harry. I was worried about him. He has said many concerning things over the past couple of years, but I did not have the ability to help him.” He sounded relieved but also frustrated. 

Tom guided him out of the room towards the gardens.  “I was surprised you and Harry had maintained communication. I was not aware you had much contact during the tournament.”

Krum’s eyebrows furrowed. “I helped him where I could. He was very lonely, the students at his school were abominable towards him. We spent many evenings in the kitchens speaking.”

”And yet, you took Miss Granger to the Yule Ball?” Tom glanced at him curiously.

Krum grimaced. “I did not wish to take anyone, but she asked me and did not seem to care about the fame, so I agreed.”

”I see. I was under the impression you asked her.  As is Harry.”

Krum glanced up at him, eyebrows raising slightly. They came to the garden doors, which Tom opened, gesturing Viktor through. “Go ahead, Harry is in the garden. I must go to greet our last guests when they come through.” Krum nodded walking through the doors. Tom could hear Harry’s laughter, followed by Luna’s and smiled, before heading back to the floo.

He moved leisurely to the floo room. Normally, he would have an elf greet his guests, but Kreacher was …unpredictable. And Madam Longbottom required direct interaction. His timing was perfect, getting settled back in the room just as the floo flashed, and the woman stepped through. She stepped to the side, leaning on her cane, as the floo flashed again, Heir Longbottom stepping out, gift in hand. 

Tom stepped forward, bowing and reaching for Madam Longbottom’s hand, kissing the air above her knuckles. “Well met, Madam Longbottom, Heir Longbottom.”

Heir Longbottom bowed in a practiced fashion, “Well met, Lord Slytherin.”

Madam Longbottom just waved her hand, “Yes, well met Corvinus. Let us be off and see Heir Potter.”  She made a shooing motion toward the door.  Tom nodded respectfully, leading them down the halls of his home. He and Severus had decorated with brightness in mind, pale painted walls, landscape paintings, and many house plants.  The matriarch took everything in with a calculating eye, but spoke no negative. The Heir appeared to appreciate the greenery, pausing several times to examine various plants closer. 

“Come, Neville, do not lollygag.” The woman gently swatted at her grandson with her cane. From the fond smile the boy gave her, it was clearly an affectionate reprimand. 

“Harry mentioned you were a prodigy with plants. Severus has cultivated extensive gardens for his potions, you are welcome to explore. I believe we may have some rare varieties of sopophorous plants in the marsh greenhouse. Luna has been enjoying the gardens, although she seems fond of the flutterby bushes - at least I assume so since we have had awaken the girl from them twice now.” He smiled as he spoke. The girl was odd, but Harry enjoyed her company, and she was gentle with Nagini.

Madam Longbottom looked up sharply. “Miss Lovegood is staying here?” She sounded scandalized. Tom was calm in his reply though. “Yes, she showed up one day, telling us her father had taken a trip to Canada. We couldn’t just send her home to an empty home. And, she has been good for Harry -  he is only now allowed off any type of bedrest, and she is calming.” 

Madam sniffed,  but said nothing further. They reached the garden doors, which opened automatically for them. As they stepped out, they could see the tables set up in the yard, Luna was gathering flowers from the decorative beds, and Harry was standing blushing next to Viktor. Severus sat at a small table observing them all. Tom looked at Madam Longbottom, “We kept the party small, while it is a major milestone, Harry was uncomfortable having too many people here, only wanting his closest friends. We do have one more guest coming, but the young people are free to visit. Lunch will be served shortly.”

The woman nodded at him, then marched to Harry herself,  no doubt intending on interrogating his son to ensure his wellbeing. Tom found himself feeling mixed feelings about this,  on one hand he was glad someone cared enough about his son to ensure his wellbeing - but on the other, where was her concern all the years before. He tamped it down, walking to Severus and kissing his cheek. “Will you go get our last guest?”

Severus nodded, standing, running his hand down Tom’s spine.  “I will return shortly.”

Tom turned to watch the children. Viktor and Harry were being interrogated by Madam Longbottom, Viktor was maintaining a respectful distance from Harry, their only contact being Harry’s hand wrapped around Viktor’s elbow. Luna was weaving flower crowns and chattering to Neville, who was listening with rapt attention.  

“Kreacher” Tom called softly. The elf popped up near silently, still wrapped in ear to toe basilisk armor. “Demon Master’s Snakey Father calls?” 

Tom repressed a sigh. “Kreacher, please lay out refreshments, and bring a good bottle of sherry for Madam Longbottom.” The elf nodded and popped away and Tom took Severus’ seat.


Severus landed outside of a worn down flat, glancing around, then taking the steps up to the door, rapping his knuckles briskly on it.

He waited a moment, hearing movement inside, but no one answered. “Wolf, either you answer or I walk in. I do not have all day.” Another sound of movement, and then the door clicked, creaking open. Lupin stood in the doorway, bags under his eyes, unshaven, wearing worn muggle clothing. Severus sniffed pointedly.  

“Snape, what is it you need?” Lupin sounded hoarse, leaning heavily against the door.  He reeked of alcohol. Severus shoved his way inside. 

“This will not do. Get your arse in the shower. You have ten minutes to become presentable. Is this your room through here? I will find appropriate clothing.” He swept through the small flat to the bedroom. Lupin’s mouth dropped and he followed. 

“Snape, leave, I cannot - not today. Just leave.”

Severus whirled around and glared at him. “This is pathetic. If you wish to see Harry, you will make yourself presentable. Am I clear?”

Lupin pulled up short, his eyes wide in shock, then anger. “You know where he is? Everyone is worried sick! Does Albus know?”

Severus pulled his wand, digging it in Lupin’s chin, backing him into the wall, eyes flashing. “Albus does not know, nor will he find out. It is because of the Headmaster’s oh-so-wonderful neglect, that Harry ended up in such a wretched state that my husband and I have had to nurse him back to health for that past two months. The only reason I am allowing you access to the boy, is he misses you. If you breathe a word of his whereabouts or wellbeing to anyone, I will not only reduce you to potions parts -  I will not allow you to partake in the test group for the new lycanthropy cure.”

Several emotions crossed Lupin’s face through Severus’ rant, ending with confusion, and hope. 

“Shower. Now. I will gather your clothing.” Severus stepped back, and Lupin stumbled to the bathroom, glancing back in shock at Severus.  Severus continued to the bedroom, sneering at the assortment of ragged clothing. With a huff, he transfigured worn pants into better trousers, and repaired and refreshed one of the man’s cardigans. The fabric was still worn, but it was neater than it was before.  Summoning a Sober-Up from his pocket, he gathered the materials and laid them on the bed, then returned to the living areas. He glowered at the mess, flicking his wand and vanishing rubbish and empty vodka bottles, then cast a refreshing charm to remove the sour air.  He heard the man yelp in the shower, followed by a crash and closed his eyes. He should have given him the Sober-Up before he got in.

Ten minutes later, the man was slinking out of the shower into his room, and several minutes after that, he came out again, marginally more presentable than he was before.

”Ok, I am ready, where are we going?” The man’s eyes were bright, flashing briefly of gold. 

Severus eyed him, then held his arm out. “If you upset Harry, you will be thrown out of the wards before you can say werewolf.” Then, without warning, he apparated them both. They landed on the path before his home, and he removed his arm from the other man and stalked up the cobblestone path. “Come. Everyone else is here.”

Lupin gaped at the white stone manor before them, but followed Severus around the side to the gardens out back.  Severus’ face softened at the sight of Harry, wearing a crown of red spider lilies, sitting between his husband and Viktor. Viktor was nudging a plate of fruit in front of Harry,  who was eating it absentmindedly while he listened to Neville speak. Severus tucked that trick away for later. Harry glanced up, seeing Severus and smiled brightly. Severus felt contentment settle into his bones, affection for his son reflected on his face.


Harry had never felt so happy as he did today. His new fathers showed him the room they had designed just for him, and it was so perfect, he couldn’t have dreamt a nicer room. And they made sure he would get to see Neville - they both had sat through what must have been a long and tedious lunch with Madam Longbottom, just so Neville would be allowed to come over. 

And Viktor - he hadn’t seen the other man since the tournament, and he was just so thrilled to see him again after years of writing letters. And if his mouth was dry, and his tongue tied at the sight of his future husband, that was no-one’s business but his own.

He sat basking in the attention of the people closest to him, eating the strawberries that Viktor thought he was sneakily putting in front of him, and listening to Neville expound upon the virtues of the variations of hellebore, when he saw his dad out of the corner of his eye. He turned and couldn’t help but smile at the sight of his no-longer-feared-potion-teacher-turned-dad, and reveled in the content smile that was turned his way as well. His eyes caught a flash of beige, and then Remus was stepping out from behind his dad. Harry’s eyes widened, and his heart filled. He knew his father did not like Remus,  but he also knew how much Harry missed the quiet man. 

He was out of his seat and flying to them, wrapping his arms around Severus. The man froze, but then returned his embrace.  “Thank you” he whispered. He pulled away and smiled at a very confused looking Remus. “I am so glad to see you! I’ve missed you.” The other man’s eyes flicked between them, but gave him a smile in return.

”I missed you as well. I was worried about you.”

“Oh, I am doing loads better now. - look! I don’t need glasses anymore! And look at my hands! My fingers work now!” Harry wiggled his fingers in front of Remus’ face.  Harry still couldn’t get over how much easier moving his fingers was, and frequently found himself staring at them while he flexed them. Remus made a wounded sound and Harry’s head jerked up to look at him. “You ok?”

Remus had a look on his face that Harry didn’t really understand, his eyes flashing gold, but he nodded. “I am perfect, now that I get to see you.”

”Well, come on. I want you to meet someone. Come on dad, father has some sort of fancy wine that Madam Longbottom is getting completely sloshed on.” He turned to head back to the garden table, missing the look of complete shock on Remus’ face, and the smug look on Severus’.

They reached the table and Harry noticed Remus’ eyes were wide, flicking around at the people sitting there. Viktor stood, holding his arm out to Harry and Harry just sighed at how sweet the other man was, before taking the arm. 

“Uncle Moony, this is Viktor Krum, my betrothed. Viktor, this is my Uncle Moony.” He was so excited to get to say that, he couldn’t help but grin.

Viktor nodded his head politely. “It is a pleasure to meet another member of Harry’s family.”

Remus’ voice sounded strange and high pitched. “Nice to meet you as well.” He looked at Harry. “Betrothed?”

Harry grinned nodding. “Yes. Oh - and you know my dad Severus, and Madam Longbottom, and Neville, and Luna - but this is my father Corvinus Slytherin, I don’t think you know him yet.” Harry felt amusement with introducing his new father to his uncle, knowing who he was before.

Remus eyes whipped to the other man. “Father?” He looked at Severus. “Dad?”

His father spoke then, his eyes crinkled in amusement. “Yes. My husband Severus, and I, chose to adopt Harrison recently. He was amenable.”

Remus sat heavily in a chair looking around, and Viktor pulled out Harry’s chair so he could sit as well. 

His father leaned forward,  “Now that everyone is here, I believe it’s time to eat -  Kreacher!”

The elf popped up, and Harry laughed outright at the look of shock on Remus’ face as he whipped to look at Harry.

”You? You are the new Black Lord?”

Harry grinned. “Yep!”

”But - you had Kreacher kick out the…group…from the house?” His eyes flicked around the table.

Harry shrugged, taking some of the Cornish hen that Viktor had stacked on his plate. “If the headmaster wanted to use my house for his super-secret bird club, then maybe he should have removed me from my relatives when he knew they were abusing me.”  He took a bite, moaning at the taste. “Well done Kreacher! This is delicious.”

Remus was growling in the back of his throat, but his dad spoke up. “Oh calm down wolf, he has been removed, and is enacting his plays of revenge against the headmaster. He is healthy, and safe, and loved with his family now.”

Remus backed down, suddenly looking sad. “Harry, I am sorry. I didn’t know, Sirius didn’t know. He would never have- you wouldn’t have been left there.”

Harry shrugged. He had mixed feelings about that. “Eat up, Kreacher made an excellent lunch. No sad talk on my birthday.  Viktor - after we eat, fancy a seeker’s game?”

He turned to his betrothed, whose lips were quirked in a ghost of a smile as Harry caught him adding even more food to his plate.

Conversation was light but pleasant as the group of people ate the meal,  Madam Longbottom was loudly discussing the next Wizenagamot session with his father, Harry and Viktor discussed his plans for the end of his contract, and Severus,  Luna, and Neville discussed different growing methods for devil’s snare. Lupin seemed to content to sit near his nephew and interject from time to time as he focused on each conversation.  

Everyone was sipping their tea, when Kreacher popped up, holding a large strawberry cake that he floated to the table. Everyone wished Harry a happy birthday day, and slices were cut and distributed. 

Luna clapped her hands. “Gifts!”  And immediately pulled a small purple wrapped present from her dress pocket, enlarging it and handing it to Harry.  His eyes crinkled as he opened it, and then stared. It was a painting, of his fathers, out of focus, with golden shimmers flittering across the canvas. It looked exactly how the sparkles looked when something was about to happen, and the view looked exactly how it had when he had lay on the bed and both men stood looking over him. He looked up at Luna, who was weaving together foxglove into a bracelet.  “That is the moment your luck changed, and you gained a family.” His throat felt tight, but he cleared it as best he could. “Thank you Luna. It’s perfect.”

Neville handed him a gift, as he handed the painting to his dad. Inside the shimmering packaging, were sketching supplies, a special tablet of enchanted paper, assorted inks and fountain pens. “You always used to sketch things, but I noticed after third year you had trouble holding the pens and stopped. I thought, now that your hands are better, you can start again.” Harry felt warmth in his chest, clutching the gift close. “Thanks Nev, this is great.”

Viktor handed him a long box next. When he opened it, his mouth dropped, and he stared at his betrothed. “This isn’t even on the market yet!”

Viktor grinned smugly. “I called in favor. It’s one of 6 prototypes. Usually, they go on display with the company.” Harry ran his fingers over the broom, his initials etched in gold on the plate that said ‘ThunderBolt 5000 - Prototype-4’. “We can take it out on our seekers’ match.” Harry beamed at the other man, wishing very, very hard, that he had paid more attention to his betrothal contract, and that his fathers hadn’t banned anything more intimate than hand holding - he wanted to kiss Viktor silly right at the moment. Viktor seemed to understand how Harry was feeling, from the grin he gave him. 

His dad cleared his throat, giving them both a look. “Your father and I have a gift for you as well.” He pulled a carved wooden box from his robes, handing it to Harry.  

Harry handed his broom to Viktor and carefully took the gift. He lifted the lid and sat staring at the pocket watch tucked inside. 

It was golden, and etched on the face were the crests of House Potter, Black, Prince, and Slytherin in four quadrants, with lilies etched around the frame. He pressed the button on it to open, seeing first the beautiful opal watch face, hands labeled with his families names, and locations, like the Weasley clock. On the left side of the opening was a photograph of his parents, James and Lily. He stared at their smiling faces for a moment as they waved, then they ran out of the photograph, and his fathers stepped in, looking more serious than his younger parents had. He looked up at his fathers, unsure of what to say or how to express how much he loved the gift. 

His father spoke first. “You can add additional photographs, they will continue to cycle. And, as your family grows, we will be able to add watch hands. It’s charmed against most natural damage and spells.”

Harry rose from his chair, moving around the table, and wrapped his arms around his father. Thank you for giving me family. His father squeezed him back tightly.  After a moment, he let go of his father, and pretended he didn’t notice the man’s eyes were glassy. He moved to his dad, and hugged him as well, whispering to him, “I love you both. I am so glad to have you both.” His dad stroked his hair. “I love you too Harrison.”


Viktor was guiding Harry through the gardens, his small hand wrapped around his arm. He was feeling quite pleased. He had only dared dream that Harry would consider his contract, but Luna had informed him that as soon as he knew Viktor wished to wed him, that he refused to even hear the other options. He puffed his chest out slightly, proud as he looked down at his betrothed. 

Harry was basking in the sunshine as they walked. Viktor had to guide them, chuckling every time Harry tried to lead them out of sight of his fathers. The contract had very strict stipulations, and from the way his fathers were watching them, like owls on the hunt, they had every intention of their son’s virtue remaining untouched until his wedding night. 

Viktor was fine with this, he had waited this long to even be considered, he could wait to kiss his betrothed. Harry, however, was incorrigible. 

Harry began humming and swaying, and Viktor smirked slightly. He was adorable.  Not that he would ever tell him that again. Harry could toss a stinging hex that felt as if a bite was taken out of you.

His smirk fell, when he realized Harry’s eyes were unfocused. He glanced over at the men across the garden - he knew about Harry’s problem, but not what to do.

Sha-la-la-la-la-la - Don’t be shy.  Harry twirled away from Viktor, who immediately was alarmed, reaching forward to catch him.

Do what the music say. Viktor was able to grab Harry’s arm,  just as Harry stepped in a small hole, tripping. Viktor lurched, pulling Harry, twisting, and they both fell. 

You gotta kiss the girl Harry murmured against his lips, were he was sprawled across Viktor’s chest. Viktor enjoyed the sensation of his betrothed against his lips for a moment, pressing a soft kiss back, before carefully lifting him up and off of him, checking him over for injuries. 

Severus and Corvinus came storming over, and Harry looked up at them sheepishly. 

“Oops?”

Notes:

Trying to create a writing schedule I will stick to - next update will be 11/27 *fingers crossed*
Will be making edits to prior chapters to correct grammar issues this week before the next update as well