Archive of Our Own

There weren't many things Stelle was afraid of. After all, how could she be afraid of something she didn't know?

One of the main perks of having lost her memory was that she knew almost nothing about the universe. She had woken up on Herta Space Station barely remembering her own name, and it had only been a few days since she had joined the Astral Express crew. She had a modicum of knowledge about things. She knew how to read, for instance. And she knew what things like 'shops' and 'restaurants' were and what they were for. But she couldn't remember ever being in a store or eating in a restaurant. For her, reality consisted of theoretical concepts that she had yet to experience.

So how could she worry about 'enemies' and 'danger' when she had encountered very few of them? Sure, there was the matter of what had happened on the Space Station. And the Antimatter Legion, of course. Not to mention the Stellaron that supposedly resided inside of her. But everything happened so fast that she barely had time to register it. Moreover — and this was a factor not to be underestimated — the consequences had been positive for her. It was thanks to those events that she had met the crew members and found a place to stay.

As far as she was concerned, everything was just fine.

At least until her path crossed that of the creature, and everything changed.

Stelle knew it was there, watching her. She could feel the signs of its presence, just like someone would know they were being watched. The goosebumps were there, as well as the hairs standing up on the back of her neck as she stared at the ceiling of her room. She didn't dare to look left or right. She was afraid that if she did, she would meet the horrible gaze of the creature, and that it would seize her without mercy. Nor did she dare to move or change her position. She was afraid that, if she stretched her limbs even a few millimeters outside the mattress, the creature would grab her and devour her.

So she stayed where she was, arms pressed to her chest, waiting for the Astral Express's day-night cycle to change phase and the lights to come back on.

Ah, if only she had listened to her instincts when she had the chance! If she had requested a night lamp when March asked her if she needed anything, she wouldn't be in this situation. Instead, she listened to her stupid Common Sense, which told her that 'being afraid of the dark was for children'.

Well, good job, Common Sense! If she was in danger now, it was all its fault! She would never listen to it again, that was for sure!

Assuming that she would survive the night, of course. Because time was passing slowly and the day refused to come.

She wanted to check the time, but she didn't have a watch, and her cell phone was on the nightstand. Sure, all she had to do was reach out and grab it. The problem was that she would have to extend her arm over the edge of the bed, and that would be a clear invitation to the creature!

Moving only a millimeter at a time, she turned onto her side. She knew it was a very rash thing to do, but the waiting was becoming torture. She had to know what time it was and how long this ordeal would last. Besides, if she managed to grab her cell phone, the light from the screen might be useful to keep the creature at bay.

She positioned herself as close to the edge of the bed as possible. When she felt the moment was right, she quickly reached out her hand, aiming straight for the phone.

She didn't manage to grab it. She didn't even get close. Just as her hand reached over the side of the bed, something grabbed her wrist. In the darkness, it was impossible to see what it was, but she felt coarse fur and claws scratching her skin. And as she tried to pull her hand back and free herself, she heard a horrible sound, halfway between a laugh and a growl.

Stelle tried to scream, but no voice came out. She tried to wriggle free, but the thing was too strong. She was completely helpless.

Before she could think of how to escape — before she could do anything — the creature yanked her violently, dragged her kicking and screaming from the mattress to the floor, then began to pull her under the bed, where her fate would be sealed...

Stelle awoke with a start, a strangled cry trapped in her throat. She expected to find herself under the bed, in the monster's clutches. Instead, she was sitting on it, her heavy breaths the only sound in the otherwise quiet room.

Everything was normal.

The bedroom was always the same, tidy and clean, if a little barren since she had nothing to customize it with yet. There were no claw marks anywhere — not on the steel shelf, not on the white carpet, not on her desk. Even the wardrobe was still closed, a sign that the creature couldn't have hidden inside.

She examined her arms and legs, looking for signs of the monster's claws, but found nothing. No scratches, no bites, nothing. Even the white flannel pajamas she wore — borrowed from Himeko until she got her own — were perfectly intact.

There was only her, the silence, and the stars shining peacefully outside the window.

Stelle put a hand on her chest and took a deep breath, trying to calm the frantic racing of her heart.

It had been a dream. A stupid nightmare. Nothing had happened.

At least for now. For all she knew, it could very well have been a prophetic dream. What guaranteed that the monster wasn't there, under the bed, waiting for her to make a wrong move? How could she sleep knowing that if she left an arm dangling out of the bed, she would be devoured?

She couldn't calm down and wanted to call someone for help, but she couldn't. The crew members were kind; in the few days she had spent with them, they had gone out of their way to ensure she was comfortable. She didn't want to abuse their kindness by bothering them in the middle of the night. She didn't want them to think she was a nuisance.

If she misbehaved, what prevented them from sending her away?

Still upset from the nightmare, she felt like crying. Part of her knew it was silly, but she couldn't help it: she was tired, sleepy, and scared. But most of all, she was lonely.

Just then, she heard a sound: an indistinct wail, halfway between a cat's meow and a cry of pain. And it was coming from somewhere below her.

She couldn't resist anymore. Her overexcited nerves gave way, and without thinking, she jumped out of bed and ran.

She didn't want to stay in that room one more second. Not with a monster lurking around, ready to kill her. She had to go, it didn't matter where.

The walk to the doorstep was realistically no more than a few seconds, but it felt like an eternity. She tripped over the carpet and then over her own feet, stumbling like a drunkard until she reached the door. She flung it open and burst into the corridor, leaving without looking back.

She had to find someplace safe. She had to find someone.

The first person she thought of was March. She didn't know her very well — like the rest of the crew, for that matter — but she'd always been nice to her. Besides, she said Stelle could come to her if she needed anything. Sure, barging into her room in the middle of the night was a little different than what she meant. But she also mentioned that they could have a sleepover in the future. So maybe she wouldn't be too angry.

The corridor was dark, and Stelle walked by feel, still too shaken to keep track of the doors she passed. The layout of the train wasn't completely familiar to her yet — at least not when she was moving blindly. For that reason, she relied on instinct to move in the general direction of March's room. When she thought she had reached the right door, she flung it open and rushed inside, her breath heavy and her head spinning.

After the initial panic subsided, the first thing she felt was confusion. It was true that she hadn't been in March's room more than a couple of times, but she remembered the decor being similar to hers. And also the stuffed animals and the board full of photos.

There was none of that here. The room was dark, but the furniture was clearly different. In the dim light, she could see the outlines of various electronic devices, small blue lights flickering underneath them. They were almost hypnotic. Under other circumstances, she might have stood and stared at them for hours.

Was this... the archive? Had she stepped into the wrong room?

"Who is it?!"

The harsh male voice made her jump, and turning in its direction, Stelle saw the silhouette of Dan Heng.

He was standing on the opposite side of the room, next to a crumpled futon, dressed in utilitarian pajamas: a simple black t-shirt and loose pants. But more importantly, he was wielding his spear, the tip pointing straight at her.

Stelle had forgotten that the train guard and archivist was in the habit of sleeping at his workstation. Bursting in so suddenly must have startled him. From the way he looked, it was as if he had jumped out of bed as soon as she entered, and his expression was tense, his lips pressed into a nervous line.

She raised her hands to show she meant no harm and stayed where she was.

"It's me," she quickly identified herself. "I was trying to get to March's room. I didn't mean to wake you up. I'm sorry."

Dan Heng stared at her for a moment. From his face, it seemed that he had also had a close encounter with the creature. She must have really scared him.

Soon, however, he calmed down. He sighed, put down the spear, and ran a hand over his face, as if to shake off a sudden wave of fatigue.

"No, forgive me. I shouldn't have pointed a weapon at you. But you never know."

His voice was calm and even as usual, but there was something different about it. A soft cadence it usually didn't have.

He seemed relieved.

...Of course, realizing that his sleep had been interrupted by a crewmate and not an intruder must have been a significant factor.

"March's room is next door," he told her. "You must have missed it."

Yes, she imagined that was the case. She also figured that the best thing to do would be to turn around, go to March, and let the poor guy sleep. Or even better, go back to her room and try to get some rest without bothering anyone.

The mere thought made her shudder. She couldn't go back to that room with the creature still on the loose. It would be suicide! Even going out into the hallway was dangerous: what if the monster had followed her there?

Instinctively, she hugged her arms to her chest, trying to control the trembling. She had to stay calm. She couldn't show how scared she was.

"Okay, thanks. Good night."

With feet that felt like they were made of lead, she turned to open the door, her hand lingering in the air without touching it. She felt Dan Heng's gaze on the back of her neck and tried to gather her courage. To convince herself that everything would be okay. That she wouldn't be devoured the moment she stepped out of the door.

"Stelle, wait."

Not anticipating his call, she jumped so hard that, if he hadn't realized something was wrong before, he certainly would this time.

When she turned back to him, Dan Heng approached her in a few quick strides. In the pale, flickering light of the archive, she saw that he was watching her closely, his eyes narrowed.

"Has something happened? You look upset."

Was it that obvious?

Stelle lowered her gaze to the floor, fidgeting with the hems of her pajamas. How could she explain it without worrying him and without sounding ridiculous?

Seeing her hesitation, he put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"You can tell me. If there is any way I can help you, I'd be glad to do so."

Stelle looked up, her eyes wide. She hadn't expected this. At least not from him.

She couldn't say that she was close to any of the crew members yet. She had only been there for a few days, so that was normal. Still, Dan Heng was the one she had interacted with the least. Of course, she didn't think badly of him! He was a good person. However, he was much more distant than the others.

From her first moment as a crew member, Pom-Pom had treated her as if she had always been there. Himeko arranged everything to ensure that her stay would be as comfortable as possible. Welt taught her everything he knew about the Stellaron, then tried to entertain her with some of his animations. March treated her as a friend and never stopped talking about all the things they would do together.

Dan Heng had been polite to her. But he had never really opened up. When it was decided that she would join them, he had received the news lukewarmly. And after that, he had never stopped to talk to her more than necessary. He wasn't avoiding her on purpose — at least she didn't think so — but he hadn't shown any particular desire to make friends, either. And that was fine with her: she didn't expect everyone to like her, and as long as their relationship remained civil, she had no complaints.

So this sudden friendly gesture, combined with the gentle tone, left her stunned.

Would he really help her if she just asked? Even if the request was absurd?

...Well, he offered, right? Maybe it was worth a try.

"Can I sleep here?"

Silence.

Dan Heng blinked in surprise. His hand fell to his side as Stelle played with a strand of hair, waiting for his reaction.

From her point of view, it made perfect sense. She didn't want to go back to her room and she was afraid that the creature was waiting for her in the corridor. And even if she went to March's room and was allowed to sleep there, the problem wouldn't be solved. That's because March had a bed that the monster could hide under. Dan Heng, on the other hand, didn't have that problem. He slept on a futon. In that respect, the archive was probably one of the safest places on the train. Her idea was actually brilliant.

From Dan Heng's standpoint, though, the request had come out of the blue and without context. And as the seconds passed, Stelle realized that he hadn't understood the crux of the matter. In fact...

"Excuse me?" he said, frowning.

"Can I sleep here?" Stelle repeated. "I won't disturb you, I promise. I can curl up in a corner. I don't need sheets or a mattress. I can sleep just about anywhere!"

At first, it seemed as if Dan Heng was still in disbelief. He continued to stare at her, thinking that she was joking. However, Stelle's tone must have been pleading enough, and she must have looked so utterly miserable, to convince him that she meant it.

Without answering her request, he turned on the light. Then he picked up a chair and offered it to her.

"Sit down."

Stelle was confused. What did that mean? Was it a yes? Or was it a no? It was hard to tell. He hadn't thrown her out, which was a good sign. Nor did he seem angry. But he hadn't accepted either.

In any case, she decided it was best to play along. She sat down, perching nervously on the edge of the chair.

Once she was settled, he continued:

"Can you stay here alone for a few minutes? I'll be right back."

Stelle hesitated. Staying there wasn't a problem; by now she had judged the archive to be safe. But she didn't like the idea of him going out into the hallway. What if the creature attacked him?

Dan Heng wasn't worried, though. Maybe he had a way to defend himself.

She nodded and, with her approval, he quickly left the room. Stelle listened to the sound of his footsteps as they retreated to the next car, until everything fell silent.

A minute passed. Then two. Several more passed, and Dan Heng still hadn't returned.

Stelle began to worry, squirming on the edge of her chair like a tortured soul. What if something had happened to him? What if the monster had caught him?

She shouldn't have gotten him involved in this. If something happened to him...!

She was contemplating braving the danger to look for him when the archive door finally opened and Dan Heng returned, a steaming cup in his hands.

Stelle was so happy to see him safe and sound that she almost hugged him. But they weren't that close and she didn't know how he would react. So she stayed where she was, watching his every move.

Dan Heng handed her the cup. When she didn't take it and continued to stare at him, he said:

"This is for you. Drink it. It will make you feel better."

Stelle took the cup tentatively. It was warm, but not too hot, and contained a yellowish liquid. As she brought it to her face, a pleasant, sweet aroma filled her nostrils.

"It's chamomile tea with honey," he explained, seeing her hesitation. "Don't you like it?"

Oh, so that was chamomile tea! The name sounded familiar.

"I don't remember ever drinking it."

A little curiosity managed to overcome her anxiety. She brought the cup to her lips and took a sip.

It tasted good. It was sweet, and as it went down her throat, its warmth melted away some of the anxiety that was knotting her stomach.

She had found something she liked.

She smiled to herself, and Dan Heng was pleased. He took another chair, moved it next to hers, and sat down at her side.

"Now, will you tell me what happened?"

There was no hint of reproach in his voice. It was calm and gentle. Soothing, just like the chamomile tea in her hands.

Stelle looked up from the cup to meet his gaze. With his hands clasped in his lap and his torso leaning toward her, he was giving her his full attention. And a spark of warmth ignited somewhere around her stomach.

"The monster that lives under the bed," she replied in a barely audible voice.

He tilted his head.

"...What?"

"The monster that lives under the bed," she repeated, more clearly this time.

Dan Heng frowned and rubbed his neck.

"It's the monster from a children's story, if I remember correctly."

Stelle nodded, taking another sip to gather her courage. Just talking about the creature made her shiver.

"One of the stories I read before bed talked about it. It hides under the bed and attacks anyone who gets up during the night. Just a peek over the edge, and it's ready to pounce on you. And then it will drag you under the bed to devour you!"

She shivered, clutching the warm mug tighter between her fingers.

"So, if I understand correctly," he said, "you think this monster is under the bed in your room."

She nodded again, more firmly.

"I dreamed it attacked me. And then, when I woke up, I heard a terrible noise, and I knew it was coming for me. So I ran."

Dan Heng listened to her confused explanation, drumming his fingers on his knees.

"What kind of noise?"

"It sounded like a wail. Or a moan. Something like that."

"A creak, maybe?" he offered.

Stelle was about to deny it, but paused in confusion. Actually, now that she thought about it, it might have been a creak. The 'unoiled metal' kind of creak.

"We're on a train, Stelle," Dan Heng said. "There are a lot of machines that are always running. Sometimes they make noise. That's probably what you heard. The story you read scared you, you had a nightmare, and when you heard the noise, you freaked out."

She sat there, her mouth comically open, the now half-empty cup clenched tightly in her hands. In a matter of minutes, he had taken the entire situation that had frightened her and made it seem ordinary and mundane.

In fact, aside from the nightmare, she had never actually seen the monster. The noise was the only real clue she had, and as he had pointed out, it didn't prove anything. And it was also true that she had had a nightmare right before, so her mind was easily affected.

But she wasn't completely convinced. Even the most rational explanation struggled against an irrational fear.

"But what if the monster is actually there? Just because I haven't seen it doesn't mean it isn't real."

"The monster that lives under the bed doesn't exist, Stelle," he replied. "It's just a story."

"You said that many stories and legends are based on real things."

It had been only a couple of days before. Stelle had gone to the archive looking for something interesting to read. While she was there, she had stumbled upon an entry dedicated to the myths and legends of the planets visited by the Astral Express. When she asked Dan Heng for information about the stories contained there, he told her that many of them were inspired by real events and phenomena. So, by his own logic, the monster could also be real.

This time, it was his turn to be taken aback. He probably hadn't expected that his comment would be used against him. After a moment of confusion, however, he regained his usual composure.

"What I meant was that they were created to explain real occurrences, but the stories themselves are fictional. I think the monster that lives under the bed is meant to represent the fear of the dark that many children—"

"So you're sure it doesn't exist? Is there any proof?" she interrupted, leaning hopefully towards him.

If he could prove that the monster didn't exist — that it was a figment of her imagination — she would be the first to jump with joy. She was all too eager to be told that this was the case.

Unfortunately, her hopes were dashed when he lowered his eyes and ran a hand through his short dark hair.

"...No. There is no proof, except for the fact that no one has ever seen it."

Stelle slumped, as disappointed as a raccoon who has been deprived of a trash can. The knot of anxiety in her stomach — which had loosened a bit thanks to the chamomile tea and her companion's kindness — tightened again.

As far as she was concerned, it wasn't enough that no one had ever seen it. How could there be witnesses if all of them had been devoured? In fact, this bothered her even more: it showed that the monster was not only ferocious, but also cunning. It was capable of covering its tracks!

She was drowning in these negative thoughts when Dan Heng's defeated sigh interrupted her. When she looked back at him, she saw him straighten his shoulders with determination.

"You're right," he said. "I don't believe the monster exists, or that it's on this train, but I can't prove it. And I understand that's a problem for you. So I won't let you go back to your room like this."

Stelle beamed, relieved at his acceptance. Knowing that he was on her side made her undeniably happy.

"You're giving me permission to sleep here?"

"No," he replied firmly, and Stelle felt an unpleasant weight fall in her stomach. But before she could feel too hurt, he continued. "I can do better."

He gently took the empty cup from her hand and placed it on the closest counter. Then he stood and grabbed his spear with the determination of a warrior preparing for battle. And when he saw Stelle's obvious confusion, his lips curved into the faintest hint of a smile.

"Let's go chase the monster away."

If someone had told her that morning that Dan Heng would come to her room to chase away the monster that lived under her bed, Stelle wouldn't have believed them. But there she was, cautiously hiding behind the threshold of her room, watching Dan Heng — the silent, stoic Dan Heng — searching every nook and cranny for a monster that might not even exist. Not only that, but he was using his spear — that beautiful spear that looked like it was made for a king — to probe all the dark corners, ready to impale any potential threat. All this with the utmost earnestness, as if the future of the Astral Express depended on quelling the irrational fears of someone he'd only known for a few days.

It was like watching every idea she had about him go straight into the trash can. And once the curtain of preconceptions and prejudices had fallen, she found that she liked what was underneath. At that moment, he looked like a true hero to her. A knight in shining armor, just like in the fairy tales she had read over the past few days.

It was absurd how quickly things could change. If she hadn't been afraid of the monster, if she hadn't taken the wrong door when she tried to reach March's room, she would never have seen any of this. And even though she was still terrified, a part of her was happy.

Happy that someone had listened to her.

Happy that someone was willing to do that for her.

Happy that that person was him.

"Nothing," Dan Heng concluded after looking under the bed for the third time, just to be safe. "If the monster was here, it must have fled before we arrived."

Stelle peered over the threshold.

"So there's nothing? Is it safe?"

"Absolutely. But in case the monster is still listening," he added, raising his voice to address some invisible presence, "be aware that there are four people on this train who won't tolerate any harm being done to Stelle. And if you try to hurt her, you'll have to deal with us."

With that not-so-subtle threat, he turned back to her and gestured for her to come closer.

Stelle entered the room. At first, she moved cautiously, fearing an attack at any moment. However, as she approached him, Dan Heng's reassuring demeanor soon made her feel more at ease, and she gave him a broad smile.

"You were a real hero!"

"Don't exaggerate. I didn't do anything special," he replied. "Do you feel better now?"

She nodded. Maybe it was because he was there, but the room seemed a lot less scary now.

"Do you think you can sleep?"

She nodded again, but her smile faltered. She hadn't lied when she said she felt better, but her fears hadn't disappeared completely. When Dan Heng said the monster wasn't there, she believed him. But the memory of the nightmare was still vivid in her mind, and she feared that if she fell asleep, it would happen again. The fear was there, buried deep in her mind. But she didn't want to show it. He had already done so much for her and she didn't want to bother him any further.

She tried to keep a calm expression on her face, but either she was terrible at it, or he was especially sharp, because she didn't fool him for a moment.

"Would you like me to stay here until you fall asleep?" he asked with such gentleness that it twisted her from the inside.

"That's not necessary! I've already bothered you enough!" she stammered, caught between surprise and confusion.

"You're my companion and I want to help you. Unless, of course, my presence bothers you."

No pressure, no annoyance. Just kindness. If she asked him to stay, he would do so without a problem. If she asked him to leave, he would go without taking offense.

How did he know exactly what she wanted? How could he always say exactly what she needed to hear and do the right things? And how could she have been so wrong about him?

She was an idiot.

"...Please stay," she muttered, eyes lowered, fingers twisting a strand of hair.

Perhaps to spare her from embarrassment, he said nothing. He simply stepped aside as Stelle passed him to reach her bed.

She turned off the light and slipped under the covers, pulling them up to her nose. Dan Heng, for his part, sat on the edge of the bed, his spear leaning against the wall to make her feel safer. He also avoided looking in her direction, his gaze fixed straight ahead. No doubt so that she would not feel watched while trying to relax.

But Stelle was too restless to sleep. And there was still something she wanted to say to him.

"Dan Heng?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you for everything."

She wanted to find better words to express how grateful she was, but she couldn't. She was terrible at this.

"Don't worry about it," he replied. "But I'm a little surprised. I saw you fight on the space station, and you had no issues whatsoever against the Legion. I never thought you'd be afraid of fairy tale monsters."

It was true. The Antimatter Legion was tangible, real, and a bigger threat than anything she would find in books. Still, it didn't scare her. Maybe it was precisely because it was tangible and real. Whereas monsters...

"I might be afraid of the unknown. The idea that something terrible could be creeping around in the dark, for example. Something I wouldn't know how to deal with. Something my bat might be useless against," she pondered.

Dan Heng nodded in understanding.

"I see. It makes sense."

"Aren't you ever afraid of the things you can't see?" she asked. Now that she was beginning to see what was behind his iron curtain, she couldn't help but be curious.

"Generally, I prefer to focus on what's in front of me. The universe is a dangerous place as it is, and I prefer not to think about what else might be lurking out there," he said. "But I understand what you mean and how that nightmare must have made you feel."

Stelle lowered the blanket a bit so she could observe him better. Now that her eyes had adjusted to the darkness, it was easier to see him. And though it was hard to catch every detail of his face, the hunch of his shoulders and the somber tone in his voice told her more than he probably intended.

"Do you have nightmares too, Dan Heng?"

He turned to look at her. He appeared emotionless and didn't answer right away. But when he did, he sounded weary.

"...Sometimes."

He said nothing more, and Stelle figured he didn't want to talk about it, so she didn't press him. It was up to him what he wanted to share. However, in light of his kindness to her, she wanted him to know that she was on his side.

"If you ever have a nightmare and need someone to talk to, I'm here. If it's a monster, I can hit it in the face with my bat for you."

He chuckled. It was the first time she had ever heard him do that. His laugh had a pleasant ring to it.

"Unfortunately, I doubt it would help much, but I appreciate the sentiment. Thank you, Stelle."

He was right, of course. If she herself was afraid of the monster that lived under the bed, she would hardly be able to protect him. But she would learn not to be afraid, sooner or later. Then she could return the favor. It was a goal to work towards.

"By the way, can I ask you a question before you fall asleep?" he suddenly asked.

Stelle nodded and he continued.

"You said you read the story before you went to bed, right?"

"Yes," she replied. "It was terrifying! It took me forever to fall asleep. I kept thinking it was going to jump out at any moment."

And then, to add insult to injury, when she finally fell asleep, she dreamed exactly what she feared would happen.

"Then why didn't you call someone right away?" This time, there was a clear hint of reproach in Dan Heng's voice. "If you were so scared that you couldn't sleep, why did you wait so long?"

Stelle curled up tighter under the covers, as if to protect herself from the question. It was legitimate and came from a place of concern, but it was still a sensitive subject for her. If she refused to answer, she doubted he would insist. On the other hand, if she wanted to get to know him better, she might as well take the first step and let him know her first. At the very least, Dan Heng wasn't the type who would make fun of her.

"I didn't want to bother anyone. I was afraid you'd get mad at me."

He frowned so deeply that she could see it even in the darkness.

"Why would we?"

Stelle shook her head.

"I don't know. Maybe because you're all so close already, while I'm still new. I thought if I proved to be a nuisance, you'd kick me out. That I would find myself alone in some remote place. And then I wouldn't know what to do because I can't remember anything. I don't even know if I would survive in such a situation."

Her voice broke, her mind unable to make logical sense of all her fears. She was just scared. She didn't know how else to explain it.

Her answer was met with silence. Dan Heng looked at her without saying anything, and she felt like sinking. She turned to the side and buried her face in the pillow, curling up even more.

Would he be angry? He would have every right to be. Now that she had said it out loud, she realized that she hadn't painted a flattering picture of the crew members. He might think she thought of them as horrible people, which wasn't true at all. In fact, it was quite the opposite!

She was the problem, and she didn't even know where her fears came from or why she felt that way. Maybe it had to do with the mysterious past she couldn't remember, but she didn't know for sure. And it was so frustrating!

All she knew was that she didn't want to leave. She didn't want to be alone again.

As her thoughts spiraled downward, Stelle felt Dan Heng move closer to her, and a hand rested on her shoulder.

"You know, I grew up in a place where it wasn't possible to have much contact with other people," he said. "I spent a good part of my life there, and when I finally left, I knew nothing about the world except what I'd read in books. I didn't know how to talk to people or what I needed to do to survive. Even going into a store to buy food seemed difficult."

Stelle lifted her eyes from the pillow and focused on him. He was close enough for her to see his expression clearly, and she noticed a hint of melancholy on his face.

She had never imagined that Dan Heng's situation was so similar to her own.

"But in the end, all these things you learn over time. If I made it, I'm sure you will too. I have no doubt about it," he continued. "What's really hard is finding a place you can call 'home.' A place where you feel safe. Where you can be yourself with the people you love."

"Have you found it here?" Stelle asked.

Dan Heng glanced out the window, at the sea of stars outside. Towards a place she couldn't see.

"I don't know," he finally answered. "But Himeko, Mr. Yang, and March have always done everything they could to make it feel that way. They want the Astral Express crew to be a family, and I know for sure that includes you. They're glad you're here, Stelle. And if you want, this can be your home. No one is going to send you away unless you choose to leave. So please, if you have a problem, talk to us. You're our companion now. We want to help you."

He leaned toward her so she couldn't avoid his gaze.

"Is that clear?"

Stelle nodded silently. She felt that if she tried to speak, she would burst into tears, and she didn't want to. But she was happy. Happier than she had been since she woke up on the Space Station. For the first time, she felt accepted by someone. For the first time, she felt like she had found a place where she belonged. Whether it would last for a short time or forever, she didn't know. But she sincerely hoped it would, because she liked these people and wanted to stay with them. She wanted to know them better.

Dan Heng removed his hand from her shoulder, but didn't move away.

"Now try to sleep. If you don't rest, you'll be exhausted tomorrow."

He was right. She needed to rest, for both of their sakes. If she didn't sleep, he wouldn't be able to rest either.

She made herself comfortable on the pillow and tried to relax, but she couldn't. Her eyes kept returning to Dan Heng, who was staring ahead again to give her space.

She had never quite noticed it before, but he was very pretty. His features were chiseled and well-defined. The straight line of his nose, the thin lips that rarely smiled, the elegant outline of his jaw... everything about him was graceful. Not to mention his bright, piercing eyes. She couldn't see them well in the dark, but she remembered that they were green. A beautiful green that, depending on the light, sometimes tended toward gray, sometimes toward pale blue.

He looked like a prince. And who knew, maybe he was one. March said that his past was as mysterious as the ingredients of Himeko's coffee. It wouldn't be so strange if he really was an exiled prince, forced to leave his country for some unknown reason.

She wanted to know more. She wanted to talk to him more. She wanted—

"What is it?"

Noticing that she was staring at him, Dan Heng turned to her, tilting his head inquisitively. And Stelle felt her cheeks warm.

"Nothing. Good night!"

Trying to keep her composure, she turned over and pulled the covers up over her forehead, her heart pounding so hard she feared he might hear it.

A few seconds passed, during which Stelle wished that she could disappear into the floor. Then...

"Good night, Stelle."

His voice was soft to her ears. Whether it was his intention or just her imagination, she had no way of knowing. All she felt was a strange tingling somewhere in her stomach and an equally strange giddiness she couldn't quite explain.

In the end, everything was the monster that lived under the bed's fault. And at this point, she was grateful for that.