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This wasn’t supposed to be a complicated excursion. This was supposed to be an easy trip to a supposedly infamous furniture store on Skypeia island, where they could pick up a coffee table for the ship’s lounge for cheap and then be on their merry way. Usopp should have known better than to believe that would be the outcome of anything with his crew.
“Even for a furniture store, this place is huge.” Robin commented as he grabbed a cart. “You said that someone mentioned this store sells the furniture in boxes and we have to put it together ourselves?”
“Yeah…” Usopp frowned. The place was oversized if that were the case. “Maybe they have areas where they show the furniture? That way we can measure it and see what it looks like in person. That sounds really convenient, actually.” He smiled. He was grateful that Pagaya had mentioned this place when Nami had complained about their lack of furniture and decor in the Merry.
“Woah, there’s a cafeteria?!” Luffy pointed at the sign pointing to different directions of the store. “I’m gonna go there while you guys get the stuff.” He went to Nami. “Gimme money for food.”
Nami huffed. “Seriously? We just got here!” Nevertheless, she forked over a twenty berry bill for him to use. That seemed to appease their captain, who scurried off in the direction the sign pointed.
Just as well, they could focus on the reason they came here without Luffy as a distraction. Usopp took in the beginning of the store, almost mesmerized by the picturesque decor hanging on the walls. “The sign said the showrooms are upstairs, we should head up-”
“Oooo, candles! And they’re only one berry each!” Nami was the last person he had expected to go rogue here, but there she was, darting over to the bin full of small candles that were discounted. “Mm, it’s pumpkin scented!” She put it in Usopp’s cart, then her eyes widened as she looked towards the supplies area that was the first floor of the store. “Woah, there’s a ton of cute stuff here!” She gasped and walked over to the kitchen supplies. “They have a sifter!”
“Wait, Nami! We just came for a coffee table!” Usopp hissed.
“These prices for pots and pans aren’t bad, and the quality seems pretty good.” Sanji mumbled as he picked up a saucepan to inspect it. “Plus if Nami-swan wants a flour sifter we absolutely need it!” His eyes became hearts and Sanji became yet another traitor in this Ipea trip.
“Nami, you should know better than anyone we don’t have the cash for this right now!” Usopp pleaded to no avail, as Nami continued to wander through the store. Her arms became fuller and fuller of random kitchen supplies, candles, bedroom decor…she was going to bankrupt them all if left to her own devices.
“I can sneak things back onto the shelves she puts in the cart, don’t worry.” Robin smiled.
Usopp slumped. “Thanks.” He looked around. “Wait, where’s Zoro?”
Robin looked around. “Shit, he’s lost. In his defense, this seems like an easy place to get lost in even for someone with a good sense of direction…”
Usopp scanned the floor, his eyes drawn to anything green. “Why is everything all sectioned off? I’m never gonna be able to track him down…”
“Usopp, can I ride in the front of the cart? There’s a seat just my size!” Chopper asked, smiling. Usopp couldn’t deny that adorable face, and immediately crouched down to pick the reindeer up and deposit him in the cart.
Chopper giggled as he found the seatbelt on it, then put it over his torso and buckled it. “Now I won’t fall out!” He grinned.
“Yeah, at least one of us isn’t running off to do god knows what…” Usopp grumbled.
“I’m sure Nami won’t get too out of control, plus a lot of the stuff she’s picking up seems to be on clearance.” Chopper attempted to comfort the crew’s sniper. It didn’t really help, considering he could see that Nami had now run out of room in her arms and was now using Sanji as a pack mule for the stuff she was grabbing.
The elevator leading to the showrooms had been back at the entrance to the store, so Usopp decided to leave Robin in charge of their rogue crew members and head upstairs. As soon as the doors opened, he regretted bringing Chopper with him. The area they entered was full of various stuffed animals.
The reindeer gasped and unbuckled himself, easily crawling out of the cart and hopping onto the floor. He ran to the stuffies. “Woww, they all look so cuddly and cute!” He began grabbing one after the other, with Usopp following behind to see the prices of them.
“Hang on, Chopper. These are pretty expensive. The big ones are thirty berry. Since Robin probably won’t be able to talk Nami down from at least a few candles and we still need to get the coffee table, how about you pick one of the smaller ones that are under ten berry?”
Chopper looked up at him, eyes wide and shiny in a pleading gaze. “But…they’re all so cute and soft…”
“I know, but we don’t have a lot of money right now. These are pretty generic plushies, you can probably find similar ones at different stores on other islands.”
Chopper sighed dejectedly and walked around the bins of plushies, eyeing each one and letting out a sad little sigh as he occasionally put them back. Usopp felt like the devil right now, but they needed to watch their finances if they wanted to continue to have the luxury of eating. Chopper finally returned with one of the larger plushes. It was a giant whale. His eyes were huge and pleading. “He looks just like Laboon. I know you said to get one of the smaller ones but I really want this one, please?”
Usopp sighed. He supposed this was all part of negotiation. “Fine, throw it in.”
Chopper smiled and put the plush in the cart, then trailed along behind Usopp as they began to walk through the various showrooms. They seemed ethereal in how picturesque the designs were. A family’s living room, complete with shoes in a doorway that didn’t exist. An apartment bedroom with a closet full of clothes. Everything was lived in, yet perfectly neat and the decor was tasteful. It was a strange idealized version of life that Usopp found incredibly off putting after having to live on his own in squalor since his mother’s death. You didn’t get this sort of nice furniture and fancy kitchens when you were a kid who had to beg and depend on charity in order to eat. He felt like a blot on each showroom they visited.
Chopper, on the other hand, seemed to be in some sort of titillating wonderland. He oohed and aahed at each room, big brown eyes raking over it all and absorbing it. “Wow, this is all so pretty! Way nicer than anything back where I’m from. They don’t even have snowshoes in the doorways, do they not get snow here?”
“I’m sure they do, it just doesn’t fit into the aesthetic for all this.”
“Do you think any humans live in these sorts of rooms?”
Usopp snorted. “I doubt it. There’s no dirty laundry, no figures or games or anything. There’s books, but they all look boring and lame. There’s no personality in any of these places. The kitchen’s don’t have stains, the floors don’t have scuffs or marks. None of this is lived in.” His fake confidence was actually starting to make him feel better about being here. He didn’t feel like a stain, but rather a critical observer seeing through the mirage this place was putting them into.
Chopper smiled. “Yeah, that’s true, I guess. It still feels fancy. Did your friend Kaya have a kitchen like that?” He pointed at one of the kitchens in the showrooms.
“Oh, no. Hers was way bigger and more industrial-looking. These kinds of kitchens would probably be more for upper-middle class types, y’know? Mid-ranking marines, doctors, lawyers, that sorta thing.”
“Ohhhh.” Chopper nodded. “That makes sense.”
However, the next showroom they came upon made Usopp immediately want to disappear. Luffy was currently snoozing on the bed. “Luffy! You’re not supposed to sleep in these!!” He hissed as he bent over to shake his captain awake.
“Mmh?” Luffy’s face scrunched up as he swatted at Usopp. “‘S a bed, what else is it for?”
Usopp groaned and pulled at Luffy’s arm, which didn’t pull the other out of the bed, rather Usopp pulled Luffy’s forearm with him as it stretched out. “It’s not your bed, dumbass! You aren’t supposed to sleep in it!”
Luffy rubbed his face and slowly sat up, shooting Usopp a glare. “You’re fired.”
“No I’m not. Someone needs to be you and Zoro’s impulse control.” Usopp grumbled. “C’mon, help me find a coffee table, all the ones I’ve seen in showrooms so far are way out of our budget. We need one that’ll be easy to nail down so it doesn’t move with the rocking of the ship.”
Usopp ignored his captain’s complaining as he plunged forward, eyes peeled on all the fake living rooms for a coffee table. He just wanted a coffee table. Maybe one that had enough space to hold stuff like blankets or board games? That would be nice, they could have more room that way…
Finally, there was a small, round table with a cage-like setup beneath the wooden top of the table. “Oh, this is nice…” He went to the table to see if it was easy to lift the lid. It came off easily enough, and looking at the wire bottom it wouldn’t be too hard to nail it down in the right spots to keep it in place. And the lid fit tight enough that it wouldn’t fly off if they ended up in a hurricane or thunderstorm.
Usopp stood up and went to the cart, grabbing the paper and miniature pencil that the store had had sitting out for people to write down the furniture item code so he could pick the coffee table up when they got to the part of the store where all the furniture was actually kept.
Chopper approached him, then sat on the display coffee table. “Pretty nice, just don’t put me in there.” He pointed to the caged section of the table.
Usopp blinked. Did Chopper think that was some sort of jail for him?! “Oh, no, I was gonna put maybe board games or blankets in it. It’ll be nice for when there are storms and stuff, then everything won’t go tumbling around on the floor.”
Chopper nodded. “Oh, that makes way more sense!” He giggled and hopped off, then began walking to the next showroom.
As they walked, dragging a sleepy Luffy behind them, he couldn’t help but worry about the others. Had Robin managed to do enough harm reduction in Nami’s shopping so they could afford all this? And where the hell was Zoro, they hadn’t managed to find him at all since he’d disappeared.
Whatever, they’d figure out Zoro when they had finally checked out and were ready to leave. In the meantime, Usopp had worked up an appetite and after the last showroom, they came back to the cafeteria. “Anything good here?”
Luffy hummed. “They had some Skypeish meatballs. Those were pretty good. They gave me a ton of peas for my first plate, though.”
“First plate? You got more than one? I thought Nami only gave you twenty berry!”
“Yeah, they’re super cheap here. One plate was only like, five berry. So I had four.” Luffy shrugged. “You have money? Can I have more?”
“WHAT? You already had four plates worth of food!”
“And?” Luffy gave him a nonchalant stare, absentmindedly picking his nose.
Usopp huffed. “One more, you can have one more since it’s so cheap. You hungry, chopper?”
“A little, I can just have some of Luffy’s plate.”
“No way, I’m gonna eat it!” Luffy huffed.
“Yeah, I’d advise not going near Luffy’s food, Chop. Last time Zoro tried to bum a french fry and we had to take him to the ER because of how deep Luffy bit him.”
Chopper, despite being covered in fur, managed to pale at that knowledge. “Right, maybe I’ll just get a snack if they have any.” He mumbled, following along behind the two humans.
Once they got in line for the food, Chopper seemed happy to discover that there were plates containing various cakes and other desserts available. He grabbed a rainbow layered cake, smiling wide. Usopp decided to try the meatballs that Luffy had seemed to enjoy, and his captain got his fifth plate of Skypeish meatballs for the day. Usopp wasn’t really sure about the cranberry sauce that came with it, but the meatballs and gravy looked pretty good and he imagined the mashed potatoes would pair with that nicely.
When they checked out and got back to the table they'd left the cart at, Nami, Sanji, and Robin were sitting there. It seemed that they had managed to catch up with Usopp, Chopper, and Luffy. Usopp was relieved to see that Nami had been negotiated down to only a few cheap decor items and the pumpkin scented candle. Great, they might actually make it out of this place without breaking the bank.
“Did you find a nice coffee table?” Robin asked.
Usopp nodded. “Yeah, the bottom is like a little cage thing we can put stuff in. I’m sure it won’t be hard to nail it to the floor in the lounge so it won’t move during storms, either.”
“Oh, we can put my candles in it!” Nami smiled wide.
“I was thinking we would put our board games or extra blankets, actually…” Usopp grumbled.
Nami shrugged. “I’m sure we can make room for both…” She pouted.
“Whatever.” Usopp grumbled. “Let’s just eat and get out of this place.” He took his fork and finally got a good look at the Skypeish meatballs, complete with a tiny flag stuck into the dish. He smiled a bit before taking a bite, letting out a soft hum. “Oh, that gravy is nice.”
“The cranberry sauce is pretty good too. And this time they didn’t give me too many peas.” Luffy mumbled through a mouthful of food that would be physically impossible for anyone else.
“You guys didn’t find the idiot marimo yet, did you?” Sanji frowned. “As much as I’d love the chance to abandon him here, he's bound to get into trouble soon.”
Oh, shit. Usopp had completely forgotten that Zoro was still lost. “Let’s just get checked out and drop everything off at the ship, then we can go back to look for him.” He really didn’t want to procrastinate any more on the original goal of this trip.
“Like I said, I’m totally fine with just ditching him here.” Sanji grumbled.
“We’re not just leaving Zoro here!” Nami snapped at him.
“Of course we aren’t!” Sanji flipped like a switch, hearts in his eyes once again. He then shook his head in bewilderment before finally pouting in silence as the others in their crew ate.
Once they were ready to check out, Usopp led the crew to the elevators and the warehouse on the first floor, only stopping to allow Robin to physically restrain Nami from the clearance section. The coffee table was retrieved, everything was paid for, and Usopp felt relieved as their journey to Ipea was almost concluded.
By some strange coincidence, Zoro ended up wandering around the docks outside, however he was on the opposite end of the dock, slowly walking around while trying to find…whatever the hell he thought he would find by coming all the way out here.
“Heyyy, Zoro! Over here!” Chopper yelled, jumping up and down in the seat of the cart. Robin had to use her devil fruit powers to catch him when he lost balance and almost fell out of the cart.
Luffy went running to Zoro, and eventually brought him back. Usopp felt like he would be able to breathe again once they were finally on the ship and had everything loaded in there.
“Alright, that’s everything.” Nami put her hands on her hips as she stood on the deck, smiling. “Now we just need to return the cart.”
“I can do it.” Zoro volunteered, perhaps out of guilt that he had gotten lost and not helped with anything during their trip.
“Someone other than Zoro.” Nami, thankfully, knew better than to let Zoro roam unsupervised.
“I’ll do it.” Usopp mumbled, grabbing the cart and pushing it to the walkway they had set out.
“Thanks,” Nami smiled. “Sorry you had to do all the work for this trip. I’ll make sure to give you some extra berry in your allowance.”
Extra berry from Nami usually meant somewhere between one and five berry, so that wasn’t much of a reward. “Yeah yeah…” Usopp sighed as he pushed the cart down to return it. It would be worth it, though, if they could use that coffee table. He wouldn’t have to hear the thunking of the board games being moved around due to the sea at night while he was trying to sleep. Growing up a lonely orphan had made him into a light sleeper, he had been far too paranoid that robbers or whoever else would try to break into his old house. There wasn’t much they’d be able to steal from him, but the chances of that were still far too scary.
When he got back onto the ship, he was pleasantly surprised when Nami held out a fifty berry bill and a small candle. “These are for you.”
“Me?” Usopp took the money and put it into his pocket, then sniffed the candle. It smelled like a garden, like the one he’d grown food in to save money back home. “Oh, this is nice.”
“Yeah, Sanji and Robin helped me pick it out. I would’ve gotten the bigger size but Robin switched it out with a smaller one while I wasn’t looking.” She pouted. “We wanted to get you something since you were leading the charge in all this and being responsible.”
Usopp stared down at the candle with wide eyes. Screw the creepy liminal perfection of the Ipea, he had all these friends who had thought about him and gotten him a present. He didn’t need picturesque rooms and decor when he had a home as great and loving as the Merry. He found his vision blurring and his nose beginning to run. He sniffled as he looked up back at Nami, smiling wide. “Thanks.”
Nami smiled and pulled him into a hug. “Of course, everybody else got something they wanted from the store, you should too.”
That only made Usopp cry harder as he hugged her.