Chapter Text
He takes a look at the bouquet of lilies he bought, yet, it all goes to waste. Lilies were her favourite.
But, he should have realised it sooner, should have popped up with those, when she was still with him.
All he could do was look at them and drown himself in guilt and scotch.
He takes another look at it and all he can think about is apologising now. He knows he's probably much too late to apologise now.
Yet, he takes the last sip of his scotch and is on the move.
“I'm probably the last person you'd want to meet.
But .. I know I can't make it up to you anymore… I was dumb and reckless.. I didn't think it through, I was too proud and selfish. I didn't mean to hurt you that way… you've been better… I think this was much needed.. God” He lets out a sigh, “I know it's probably much too late, but I really am embarrassed for my actions”
He's probably had too much, because he ended up entertaining the thought of hoping.
He adds,
“Is it too late for me to clean up the mess I made? For better or for worse.
It's probably too much to ask right?”
With that he gets up, apologising one last time and turns on his heels
… …
She knew she wasn't the only one. She knelt in front of the door and listened to him, as he drunkenly apologised. “For better or for worse” That was the vow they vowed too.
But was this going to be involved in the ‘worse’ too?
But they vowed honesty, loyalty and sincerity?
Yet he didn't uphold any of those.
Didn't he know better?
Listening to it all, she replayed his drunken apology like a movie where the stop button does not exist.
In the end, she'd end up succumbing.
She'd always loved the colour blue. Yet, she felt so blue over the whole thing.
“He whispered words of love to another, I wasn't the only one,....we vowed, Lucy. We vowed honesty, loyalty, sincerity, it was him and I, together did death do us apart. Yet, I wasn't the only one for him, does this come under worse too?
She broke down, comfort not knowing to reach her.
She was a heartbroken mess, God it was awful to see her in that state. Her friend could barely take in the sight.
She was once strong, but she wasn't able to be anymore.
“I don't want to feel this anymore… Guess it's true, when he said I couldn't grasp on my emotions.
..am I at fault here?”
The voice in her head kept saying, she was to blame.
“Maybe I couldn't or… I wasn't able to live up to his expectations,.. Maybe I caused him… disappointment.”
Oh how she sought comfort, yet she couldn't feel any.