Chapter Text
くコ:彡
"Yoo Joonghyuk-ssi!"
The former regressor snapped his eyes open as the loud cry interrupted his meditation. Irritated but not showing it, he turned to the source of noise.
Lee Hyunsung was panting at the door, face screwed in worry as he stared at their nebula's co-leader.
"I- it's Kim Dokja-ssi."
What did that squid do this time? Yoo Joonghyuk growled mentally.
As if sensing his thoughts, the former soldier gestured with his hands to follow him. "You should see it for yourself."
くコ:彡
Yoo Joonghyuk did not see anything that should cause any alarm. Yet the group, except for the kids, was looking at him expectantly, expressions mixed with apprehension and worry. Han Sooyoung, on the other hand was just laughing off to the side.
The former regressor still didn't know what he should be looking at.
"Well?" Jung Heewon asked impatiently.
"Well what?"
Jung Heewon looked like she wanted to strangle him. "What should we do with him?" She asked instead, a hint of hysteria in her voice.
Yoo Joonghyuk turned back to the pond in confusion. Him? Him who? Where?
Getting tired of the protagonist's stupidity, Han Sooyoung marched forward and gripped the bastard's head to force him to look at a certain direction.
"Oh my god, you stupid oaf. The squid! Look at the squid!" The false prophet practically shouted in his ear.
"Unhand me, woman," Yoo Joonghyuk growled menacingly, hand reaching for his sword in an instant. The latter yelped, quickly released him, and went a safe distance away from the former regressor and his newly polished sword.
He glared at her for good measure before the witch blew raspberry in his direction. Yoo Joonghyuk almost rolled his eyes at her childish antics but chose to ignore it and turn his attention back to the pond.
Ah, the squid.
The former regressor immediately saw it. It would be hard to see at first due to its miniscule size (almost the same size as his thumb) but the wriggling definitely caught his attention.
Don't tell me...
"... Kim Dokja?"
The wriggling intensified.
"Why...is Kim Dokja a squid again?"
"He failed a hidden scenario."
Yoo Joonghyuk felt a headache coming. He glared at the squid. The wriggling abruptly stopped, as if chastised. Joonghyuk closed his eyes and rubbed his temples before sighing out loud and asking, "How do you expect me to know what to do with this?"
As if waiting for this exact moment, a notification came.
[The constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire says she can give them a way to help save the constellation Demon King of Salvation.]
The former regressor narrowed his eyes at the screen, a bad feeling in his guts told him not to accept. But looking back at his distressed companions, he knew they had no other choice.
"What is it?"
Instead of a reply, a different notification popped up.
[A new personal scenario has arrived for incarnation Yoo Joonghyuk!]
A blue screen promptly appeared in front of Yoo Joonghyuk.
[Personal Scenario - Save your Life and Death Companion from a slimy demise.]
Category: Personal
Difficulty: C+
Clear Conditions: Regain the constellation Demon King of Salvation back to his human form with a true love's kiss.
Time Limit: Until Midnight
Compensation: 3 000 coins, the return of your beloved companion
Failure: Kim Dokja will remain in his current form forever.
For a moment, there was utter silence. Yoo Joonghyuk stared blankly at the conditions. Then his glare came back with full force, directing it to the heavens.
"You...!"
[The Demon-like Judge of Fire insists it's for the greater good.]
[The constellation who likes to change genders is intrigued.]
[The constellation who enjoys fairytales is overjoyed.]
[The constellation Secretive Plotter pities the incarnation Yoo Joonghyuk.]
[The constellation who likes seafood says just cook the calamari.]
[The constellation Abyssal Black Flame Dragon is annoyed at the conditions. He says there should be fighting to death involved.]
Frustrated, Yoo Joonghyuk redirected his glare to his companions. To Lee Hyunsung in particular, the one who called him out in the first place. It was pathetic how the huge man tried to hide behind Jung Heewon who only glared back at the former regressor.
Helpless and angered, Yoo Joonghyuk snapped his gaze back to the squid, who seemed to be back at his wriggling, but this time, at an alarming speed.
"Put the goddamn squid in a bucket and take it home," Yoo Joonghyuk gritted out to no one in particular.
"But-" Someone tried to protest but the former regressor snapped before they could continue.
"I don't care! Let that rat bastard rot in that form. I'm not kissing that!" He then proceeded to march away without looking back, ignoring the protests of the other nebula members.
くコ:彡
[The constellation Most Ancient Liberator asks don't you have remorse? Will you let our maknae continue to suffer like this?]
At his words, Yoo Joonghyuk absentmindedly looked at the water tank beside him. Heewon and Hyunsung brought it in their complex after much debate (they tried to persuade Joonghyuk to get the scenario over with so they can have their leader back but the sunfish bastard was stubborn and the argument led to nowhere). Kim Dokja was leisurely swimming in circles. The former regressor muses on what might the squid be thinking.
[The constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire says the incarnation Yoo Joonghyuk must be shy.]
Yoo Joonghyuk gave an annoyed grunt.
[The constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire says it's okay, it's still his beloved companion. No need to get shy.]
"I said before that I'm not interested in men," Yoo Joonghyuk said loudly.
The squid in the tank froze, before suddenly wriggling, like it was laughing at Yoo Joonghyuk. The latter glared at it.
[The constellation Secretive Plotter says the Nile is a river in Egypt.]
[The constellation Secretive Plotter takes back what he said. It was not him who typed that.]
[The constellation Secretive Plotter says being stupid runs in the blood.]
[The constellation Secretive Plotter says ignore what he's saying.]
[The constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire wonders if the constellation Secretive Plotter is alright.]
[The constellation Abyssal Black Flame Dragon says the constellation Secretive Plotter always has a screw loose.]
[The constellation Most Ancient Liberator says their maknae is not a man at the moment but a squid. Surely that qualifies.]
Yoo Joonghyuk scoffed at the constellations' stupidity. He was tempted to call out Biyoo and shut the annoying pests up but he recalled Kim Dokja's lectures about not overtaxing the tiny dokkaebi.
[The constellation Maritime War God says the clock is ticking.]
At that, Yoo Joonghyuk's mood soured further. The orange hues of the sky outside the complex indicates that it was already nearing sunset. The living room might be barren at the moment save for Yoo Joonghyuk himself and the squid (the former regressor kicked everyone out earlier when he had enough of their whining) but he knew his companions were worried to death and would come barging in later. They didn't tell the kids about what happened so not to cause panic and distress. Somehow, they managed to distract the lot from seeing Kim Dokja's pathetic form.
"If you asked me for help, this wouldn't have happened, you fool," Yoo Joonghyuk said loudly to the tank.
The squid swam rapidly in circles before stopping and floating up and down near Yoo Joonghyuk's direction, as if relaying its agitation.
"Why am I even in this mess?" Yoo Joonghyuk groaned out loud. He knew he was acting uncharacteristically. But he knew the situation was heavily serious. They might not get their leader back if he failed this personal scenario. Putting this responsibility in his hands was daunting, especially with the kind of condition he had to do.
Why the fuck is there a kiss involved? It could've been much simpler if they really wanted to help! Like sock the squid maybe or squish the squid.
Ignoring the notifications from the constellations and looking away from the tank, Yoo Joonghyuk stood up and proceeded to lock himself in his room to brood.
くコ:彡
Yoo Joonghyuk fell asleep. He didn't know when but that was not important. The urgent thing was his dream.
The former regressor could tell he was in a dream. The haze that surrounded him, the inability to control his movements, and the daze-like state he found himself in were the indicators.
It started normal enough. Yoo Joonghyuk was polishing his sword in his brooding corner in the living room like the usual. Then for some reason, his former companion in past regressions suddenly barged in the room. Delusional Demon Kim Namwoon marched up to him and easily snatched his sword out of his grip.
"Find the squid, your highness," he said with a straight face.
Before the bewildered Yoo Joonghyuk could speak, the white-haired young man walked past him in a blur. The former regressor could only stare in horror as Kim Namwoon stopped by the window and proceeded to throw away the sword with all his might.
Yoo Joonghyuk stood up, a thunderous expression on his face, and advanced on the boy. He grasped his collar tightly and spat in his face, "Why did you do that?!"
The Delusional Demon merely smiled. "You need the squid."
Before Yoo Joonghyuk could ask what the hell are you talking about, the dream did it's strange transition thing.
Kim Namwoon disappeared from his grip, replaced by a leaf. Confused, Yoo Joonghyuk blinked and looked around. He was suddenly outside although the surroundings seemed unfamiliar. It was definitely not the destroyed Seoul.
He was standing beneath a willow tree, a lake to his side. From a distance, he could see a castle. Frowning, Yoo Joonghyuk turned his head, only for his reflection on the clear water to catch his attention.
The Supreme King grimaced as he looked at his reflection. For some reason, he was wearing a tiara. Thankfully, he was still in his usual clothes. Then a glint from the corner of his eye caught his attention.
He could feel his expression relaxing as he saw the unmistakable form of his sword at the bottom of the lake. It was situated near him and it looked like it wasn't that deep. He was about to dive in when...
"Hey."
Blinking, Yoo Joonghyuk looked around for the source of the voice. It sounded familiar to him.
"Down here, Princess."
That irked Yoo Joonghyuk. He looked back at the lake, squinting his eyes. There. A familiar looking thing wriggled on the water, disturbing the stillness.
A slimy looking squid.
Squids don't even spawn in lakes.
"I can retrieve the sword for you. All I want in return is a kiss," it spoke in its familiar drawl, although Yoo Joonghyuk couldn't see where its mouth was.
"I can get the sword myself."
"Ah, but you'll get your dress wet, darling."
Astounded at its audacity, Yoo Joonghyuk glared at the squid.
"I'm not wearing a dress."
"Oh. Your chest belts then."
"Get lost, squid."
"You're hurting my feelings. Just so you know, I'm a great kisser!"
"I will kill you."
"Don't be like that, darling."
"Stop calling me that!" Yoo Joonghyuk snapped.
"But your highness, don't you recognize your beloved life and death companion?"
That made Yoo Joonghyuk freeze. The term was familiar to him but being in a separate setting from reality, Yoo Joonghyuk couldn't put a finger on it.
Then, in a sudden poof, the squid disappeared, startling Yoo Joonghyuk. In its place, a man suddenly stood, lower parts of his legs soaked in water.
Yoo Joonghyuk could only gape as Kim Dokja stood there, grinning at him. He did a clumsy bow before speaking. "Greetings, your Highness, Princess Yoo. In case you forgot, I am your soon to be betrothed, Prince Kim Dokja of the Underworld."
Before the former regressor could process his words, Kim Dokja turned around and quickly dived in the lake. The familiar tinge of worry seeped into Yoo Joonghyuk's chest as he watched his companion disappear in the water.
But not a moment later, he emerged again, hair soaking wet and a mess on his head, with Yoo Joonghyuk's sword in his hand.
"I got it, your highness!"
Yoo Joonghyuk bit back a reply. Hurry and get out of there. You'll get a cold.
Kim Dokja walked out of the water, looking like a pathetic drenched rat. He offered the sword to Yoo Joonghyuk but before the latter could snatch it, the squid took it back.
"Ah, ah. My kiss first."
Yoo Joonghyuk looked at him like he lost his mind.
"Don't look at me like that. I was cursed by that fucking witch, Han Sooyoung, and I had to endure living like a squid for what felt like forever! I just need your kiss to lift it."
"I'm not interested in men," Yoo Joonghyuk glowered as he took an unconscious step back.
Kim Dokja stepped closer, head tilting as he looked up at Yoo Joonghyuk under his fluttering lashes. "Are you not really?"
Yoo Joonghyuk froze at his change of tone. He was coming closer, almost a hair breadth away. Water dripped from his hair to his pale cheeks, sliding down until his chin before it dropped onto his collarbone. Yoo Joonghyuk could feel his throat going dry, not realizing that his gaze was now focusing on the squid's pinkish mouth. It opened a sliver, making Yoo Joonghyuk's stare burn even more.
"Does Joonghyukie not want to kiss me?" The sly squid said in a pout, tiptoeing a bit as he stared at Yoo Joonghyuk's mouth.
The former regressor couldn't find his voice. A whip of Kim Dokja's scent assaulted his senses and he felt the grip on his sanity slowly slipping away. The rat bastard's face was looming closer, hands coming up to rest at Yoo Joonghyuk's shoulders, leaning into his space. The former regressor's traitorous hands gripped Kim Dokja's waist to steady him.
"Joonghyuk-ah," the reader breathed against his lips. And...
Yoo Joonghyuk woke up, face raging red.
He decided that that nightmare was everyone's fault for putting him in this mess. He tried not to dwell on the details but failed miserably as he couldn't get the stupid squid and his inviting mouth out of his head.
くコ:彡
It was two hours before midnight when KimCom members finally had enough and barged in Yoo Joonghyuk's bedroom (Han Sooyoung knew how to pick locks, to no one's surprise). They dared to disturb the peaceful, squid-less, atmosphere that Yoo Joonghyuk built hard for the past hours (by ignoring everything outside his room and pretending nothing's the matter - very unprotagonist of him). They even dared to force a harassed-looking supreme king out of his room, dragging him to the rooftop of all places. Yoo Sangah then shoved a half-full water bucket in his hands.
"Get this over with, Joonghyuk-ssi."
"Save the rat bastard or we will force you to do it ourselves," Han Sooyoung demanded (she looked like she enjoyed his suffering more than being worried about the squid).
Yoo Joonghyuk was, as anticipated, greatly displeased. He did not appreciate being shoved around and threatened. But his intense glare and murderous aura didn't seem to faze KimCom anymore. They all stood there, glaring back at the former regressor defiantly (except for Lee Hyunsung who looked more constipated than defiant).
"Well? What are you waiting for?" Jung Heewon asked impatiently.
Yoo Joonghyuk looked at them in disbelief, then scoffed. "You're not staying here."
"We won't leave you alone. You might try to escape," Yoo Sangah said calmly.
Furious, Yoo Joonghyuk placed the bucket in his one hand while using his other hand to get his sword. He swung it around him which caused the others to fall back with noises of surprise.
"Get out or I'll kill you all!"
"Joonghyuk-ssi-"
"I'll kiss the goddamn squid if you get out of my sight!"
Not fully assured, KimCom reluctantly went down, warily eyeing his sword as they go.
"Make sure you leave a big smooch!" Han Sooyoung gleefully said before slamming the door shut.
Furious, Yoo Joonghyuk set his sword aside and glowered at the bucket in his hands. Water splashed as the squid swam about in agitation.
"I'm gonna kill you when you turn back Kim Dokja," he said without heat. He was more worried about the kiss at the moment.
He then set the bucket down on the ledge before scooping out the squid gently with both hands, making sure the water wouldn't easily leak from his palms. The squid wriggled in his hands, tickling his skin a bit.
"This is ridiculous," he said out loud.
[The constellation Demon-like Judge of Fire is squealing in delight.]
[The constellation Abyssal Black Flame Dragon says he can't watch this.]
[The constellation Most Ancient Liberator is pulling his hair.]
[The constellation Secretive Plotter is watching with amusement.]
Yoo Joonghyuk, fed up with their antics and not wanting for the whole star stream to see his humiliation, called out Biyoo and told her to turn on the ads until he gets the scenario over with. The tiny dokkaebi thankfully did so, cutting off the protests from various constellations.
He glared at the squid for a long time, the said squid was squirming, obviously uncomfortable with the tension.
Then the Supreme King closed his eyes and brought his hands closer to his face. It was quick, just a silent small peck at the side of the squid's head – Yoo Joonghyuk barely felt the slimy texture of the creature's skin – but the effect was instantaneous.
Not even a second later, a disgruntled, red-faced Kim Dokja appeared in his arms. Yoo Joonghyuk wasn't prepared by the sudden added weight so they both tumbled to the ground. The former regressor let out a grunt as he landed on his ass and as Kim Dokja landed on his lap with a yelp.
[The personal scenario - Save your Life and Death Companion from a slimy demise has ended.]
[You have earned 3 000 coins as an achievement reward.]
Both men stared at each other for a while, flustered and disoriented. Then, as if only realizing their positions, Kim Dokja yelped and shot out of the former regressor's lap in a blur. He dusted himself for a distraction as he stood a safe distance away.
The former regressor reigned in his messy thoughts and calmly stood up, face impassive as he retrieved his sword. Then he faced the squid himself. He looked the same as ever, his white coat and all – only looking slightly rumpled. For sure, living as a squid for hours wasn't pleasant experience. And the rat had gone through that twice already.
"Kim Dokja."
"Yoo Joonghyuk."
They stared at each other (more like Yoo Joonghyuk was drilling holes into the reader's head while Kim Dokja sheepishly stared back).
Yoo Joonghyuk certainly did not recall how Kim Dokja looked in his dream – nightmare! – and compare it to reality.
"Next time you subject me in something like this again, I will kill you right away."
Before the rat bastard could reply, Yoo Joonghyuk already walked past him, cloak billowing. He slammed the door with extra force than necessary, trying to ignore the image of Kim Dokja's parted lips searing into his brain.
くコ:彡