Chapter Text
When I said I'd die to get samples of the tree of souls, I didn't know that I'd actually die, ‘bullets are bitches’ so they say…well, nobody's said that but who cares? It's true.
I sat and looked over samples over and over again, day in and day out, it was like heaven, well it was heaven. The whole getting used to being dead thing was strange but it didn't feel all that different from living except now I had all the time in the world to spend looking at samples or reading books. The quietness was a stark contrast to the constant bustling of my lab back at hell's gate even though it looked exactly Identical.
The only downside to being dead is that no one is dead with you, you're completely alone. Granted, I was never a sociable person in life and often preferred plants to people but still…you end up missing the bustling activity and noise that used to irritate you, here you could hear a pin drop. The loneliness here is the opposite to what religions on earth preach the afterlife to be, they say heaven reunites you with your family and friends but as I said, I'm completely alone here with only myself and my work.
“Grace?.”
I jumped a little in my seat, I quickly turned round to face the voice which had called my name. My eyes couldn't believe what they were seeing.
“Jake? Is that you? No, you're not dead, are you?,” I stood up, pushing my chair in as I ran over to Jake, embracing him in a hug, this was when I realised that the flesh I was hugging wasn't a fleshy peach but rather a stripey blue . I opened my mouth in shock but before I could speak, the tall blue Jake did all the talking for me.
Jake shook his head, “I'm not dead, I'm just in a new body, my avatar body,” He explained, he cupped my head with his hand, “I'm connected to a tree right now, I have news for you Grace.”
“News? Is everyone okay?.”
“We're doing our best, many were lost during the battle. Tsu'tey, Trudy and many others…I'm trying to do my best as olo'eyktan but it's hard, way harder than I thought.”
I rolled my eyes, chuckling a bit, “harder than you thought? Jake, being the olo'eyktan or the tsahik is the hardest thing any na'vi can do, what did you think it would be? A stroll in the park?.”
Jake's frown crept into a smile, his white fangs prominent against the dark blue of his lips, “even in death, you're still critiquing my ass,” His snigger then turned into a sigh as he made eye contact with me, yellow meeting brown, “I've missed you Grace.”
I wanted to tell him I missed him too but my mind darted back to the mentions of the losses of the battle, “Tsu'tey and Trudy…they were both so young, how's Neytiri holding up?.”
Jake paced around a little, his tail stiff as he walked, he fiddled with his large hands, “she's fine, she's upset like the rest of us but Grace, we really need to talk about something, I'd maybe sit down if I were you.”
And so there we were, both sat down on the cold, hard floor of my spirit lab. I tilted my head to the side as I awaited whatever he had in store to tell me.
“So Grace…you're pregnant.”
What?, I thought, this is what he came here to tell me?.
Is he being serious or joking? Is this why he came to see me? To joke around?, there was no way in hell I was having a child, doesn't he know I'm in my 50s? Any chance of me having kids was long past me…although he was now the olo'eyktan, he was still a dumb marine in some aspects.
I raised my eyebrows, my expression filled with a heavy dose of scepticism and confusion, “Jake, I'm not pregnant, I'm dead,” I spoke bluntly, I nodded back and forth repeatedly, “I've been sitting in this lab alone since I died, there's no spooky ghost around here that would knock me up.”
“No Grace, I didn't mean YOU as in the you I'm talking to right now, I meant your avatar body,” He covered his eyes with his hand, probably ashamed of how stupid he looked, “it's been brain dead since you died but the lab guys found a baby developing inside it, we don't know who the father is, genetically there isn't one.”
“But that isn't possible, in order for an egg-.”
“I know how that works Grace, I've got a kid.”
I got up and sat back down in the chair at my desk, I fiddled around with a pen as I tried to think of an explanation for this impossible situation, “it just doesn't make sense Jake…”
Then my eyes widened as I finally processed everything Jake had just told me, “You've got a kid with Neytiri? When?.”
“Well, they haven't been born yet, it could be any day now…the same with your little one.”
My eyes darted between Jake and my work, so it really was real, the baby growing inside of my avatar. I just sat there, trying to make sense of it all, I just couldn't believe it. “I guess they'll probably be friends…your kid and mine, kinda like how we were friends.”
Jake could probably see the tears forming in my eyes, I'm so bad at hiding them. I wiped a few stray ones away from my eyes. “What's wrong Grace?.”
“No, no, it's nothing Jake.”
“No, somethings wrong,” Jake kneeled beside me, looking up at me like a stray cat, “I've only ever seen you cry once and i know that when you're crying…you're feeling something strong.”
I took a long shaky breath in, I tried to speak but my voice came out as a croak, “it's just…I was never in the position to have kids in life, I was always focused on my career for years,” I went on, fiddled with my necklace, “years go by and you don't realise how fast opportunities like having kids fly away from you…”
“And now the time where I actually have a child, it's in my comatose body while I'm sitting here dead, i can't be the mother the child needs” I had tears streaming down my face but I tried laughing them off, I hated crying in front of people, “deaths a bitch I suppose…”
Jake looked to be getting emotional too, his large yellow eyes looked almost reflective in the light, he took my small human hand in his and held it tight. “Grace, me and Neytiri will love and raise her as our own, she'll come and visit you often.”
“Her?,” my voice cracked, a little girl, I'd always wanted a little girl.
Jake nodded reassuringly, circling my palm with his large blue thumb, “Yes, the lab guys told us, a girl,” he gave me a toothy smile as he used his other hand to wipe his own tears, “Na'vi children go through their first communion with Eywa not long after their birth, you'll get to meet her soon.”
I came down from my chair and hugged Jake once again, holding him tight while I fixed stray strands of hair that were falling in his face, “Thank you Jake…I never told you this when I was alive but I loved you,” I sniffled, “you were like the son I never had.”
I could feel Jake's heart skip a beat in his chest as his lips remained parted, he paused before bringing his face closer to mine so our foreheads touched, “and you took better care of me than most did,” he replied, looking directly into my eyes, a comforting gaze.
And with that, he slowly disappeared into the mist and I was alone again…