Chapter Text
In all the years he’s lived there, the temple’s walls never felt so suffocating.
The smell of dust and humidity never bothered him, the chatting of members in adjacent rooms never distracted him.
His grandfather used to say that the temple would always be his home, even if Sethos liked to explore every dune and every cave as soon as he was granted permission, even if he spent the night staring at the stars from a palm tree unwilling to walk back just yet. The temple would wait for his return, like a parent patiently waiting for their child, welcoming Sethos with its dim light, the incense burning at the entrance, the intricate rooms that he could navigate with eyes closed and familiar faces that would always smile at him.
No matter how far he ventured during the day, no matter how many oasis or camps he passed by, he knew every journey would end with his return to the Temple of Silence.
He was thirteen when his body took full control over the spirit inside him, he still remembers the pain fading away slowly, day after day, as the electricity flowed inside his veins, no more menacing but empowering. He remembers the first time he was able to summon that power, forming a bond with its owner and releasing a strength he never possessed before. Sethos remembers every single moment of his life as a vessel and, above all, remembers his grandfather’s proud eyes while he knelt before him.
“You are him. You’ll guide us. This temple will be yours.”
Growing up Sethos never forgot his duty, never thought of a life outside of the temple or without the spirit. He studied, trained, prayed every day to become the leader everyone expected him to be.
Until Cyno came to take away everything he had worked for.
Losing his Ba fragment felt like losing his own identity, his purpose and his temple. Sethos thought he would never be able to accept his new self, even if it was a consequence of his own plan, a measure to save the temple itself and provide his grandfather with the reassurance he needed to finally let go and put an end to his suffering.
Funny how Cyno was also the one who extended his hand first, treating Sethos like the brother he needed in that moment, a new family embracing him right after losing his only relative.
He was grateful, truly.
But suddenly the temple didn’t feel so welcoming anymore. Every room brought up memories Sethos wasn’t ready to face, every book reminded him of a past he was still trying to overcome. He was the leader of the Temple of Silence, the rightful heir of the knowledge of King Deshret, yet the pressure of that title was weighing on him like never before.
Sethos loved his people but for the first time he was feeling… undeserving.
The situation worsened after his job as an ambassador brought him in the city and Sethos realized just how much he didn’t know about the world, how many places he hadn’t visited, how many experiences he hadn't lived.
It made him feel immature and unprepared to take over the role as a leader.
Which brings him to the present, sitting on a cold stool made of stone, quill in one hand and blank scrolls lying on the table in front of him.
Two months and a half have passed and Sethos is still unsure of what his real role inside the temple is, but one thing he knows for sure: he’s not ready to settle.
The temple will always be his home, his final destination.
But for now, he feels the need to learn more, to explore more. To become the leader the temple deserves.
Sethos knows he will have to fully commit to his job as a leader one day, better sooner than later, but for now he wants to take the chance and enrich his personal baggage while traveling in the forest.
Before becoming a real leader he must discover the real Sethos, the human one.
Sethos dips the quill into the ink jar and lets his hand hang above the scroll for a moment, a thousand thoughts rushing to his mind.
The first ink drop stains the corner of the paper, then the first letter is written with cautious movements and after that a dozen other letters fill the page, eagerly, anticipating.
By the time Sethos is done there are various crossed words and stains on the paper, his hand is inked black on the side and his lips stretch into a smile.
He will find himself, he will make his grandfather proud again.
Things I want to do before becoming a leader:
[...]
Whenever he’s in Sumeru city, Sethos is an errand-boy, or at least that’s what the forest citizens think.
When his face became familiar around the city, people also started wondering which led to a serious conversation between him, General Mahamatra Cyno and Lessen Lord Kusanali herself.
“As long as the documents provided aren’t meant for public knowledge it would be better to act undercover.”Had suggested Nahida (as she pleaded to be addressed) and Sethos had nothing to retort, he was taught about the secrecy of King Deshret’s scriptures from a young age and had been trained to protect them ever since.
If Nahida hadn’t taken full responsibility for the possible consequences of a data leak, Sethos would still be skeptical in handing such precious documents to the Akademiya.
Being an errand-boy isn’t bad and isn’t technically a lie. He does run errands back and forth from the desert, just not the kind of errands everyone in the city imagines. Actually, he should have seen it coming when people became a little too accustomed to his presence and started hiring him for their own daily commissions.
The first time he almost refused, but the smell of freshly fried panipuri offered as a reward convinced him to accept an easy errand. And he never stopped.
Sethos enjoys the smiles, the gratitude and especially the way helping those people gets him to fit in, to learn more about the city or their culture. He loves seeing those people opening up and embracing him as one of their own, trusting him with stories and gossip, spoiling him with snacks and little treats.
Helping Erfan move the huge vase at the front of the tavern earned him a free meal and a good morning every day he’s in town. Fishing side to side with Zakai had him learn a new fishing technique and then, in the evening, Sethos was invited to drink with Zakai’s old fishing group. Delivering a letter on behalf of Nabiya was definitely an experience! The letter was picked up by a cat under Sethos' shocked eyes and, after returning to the young girl, she offered a free reading of his fortune. Sethos had to decline but accepted in exchange to learn about the best place in town where to go star-gazing.
His days in Sumeru City are never boring, never empty. Life in the forest is a strong contrast with the desert, so much that Sethos still wonders how it is possible for two regions so close to be so different, but it’s exactly what he was looking for: a change and a new perspective.
He misses the desert and his people, of course, but he wants to use this collaboration as an opportunity to bring some novelty to the temple, not only to be a wiser leader but also to ease the life of the other members with new tricks and amenities.
If there’s anything about the forest Sethos isn’t too fond of it’s the Akademiya itself. Although he recognizes its power and value, he can’t help but being a little biased about the scholars roaming around the city with their pompous robes and hats, loudly flaunting their success to latch onto an idea of superiority no one else but them believes in.
In all honesty, Sethos would love to follow some of the Akademiya courses, he simply thinks the institution should humble down its students. So much for being the biggest brains in Sumeru, only few of them would survive a night in the desert with no assistance, sages included.
“You’ve been spacing out, Sethos.”
Cyno’s voice brings him back to reality.
The low chatting inside Puspa Café falls in background as General Mahamatra picks a card from the deck and glares his way. Nothing makes Cyno angrier than an opponent who isn’t focusing on the game.
After a quick glance at his hand, Sethos realizes he hasn’t paid attention to his card since round three and he can tell how the match will end already. Surprise surprise.
“Sorry, you shattered my strategy.” He lied.
Cyno must know because he grunts and throws his cards on the table sighing.
“I don’t have time for another match, shall we reschedule in three days?”
They should really have a conversation about Cyno’s unhealthy obsession for that game.
Sethos agrees anyway, because he doesn’t want to disappoint his friend and because Cyno is letting him stay at his place instead of wasting precious mora in a hotel room.
They haven’t met in a while, both having been busy with their duties, so Cyno offered a late treat and a Genius Invokation match as a welcome back.
“Not tomorrow?”
The last ajilenakh cake is pushed towards Sethos who watches his friend sit back and cross his arms, eyes exploring the scenario around them as if he needs to make sure nobody else is listening.
“I’m leaving for the desert tomorrow morning. I won’t be back until the next day.”
A soft consent comes out of Sethos' mouth. He takes his time chewing on the last cake feigning nonchalance, knowing Cyno can get quite defensive when it comes to his personal life.
“Overnight expedition? Or are you visiting Gandharva Ville after the job’s done?”
“The latter.” His friend tugs at his headpiece, lowering it a bit further over his eyes. “Collei has acquired a new cooking skill and wants to show me.”
Sethos nods, refraining from grinning.
“Cute.” And extremely generic.
Something tells me Collei isn’t the sole reason for your visit.
Empty glasses and plates are gathered while Cyno stands up to fetch his belongings. A few customers are looking their way, Sethos vaguely remembers Enteka, the manager of the café, telling him how the General has become quite popular nowadays. It’s stupid but Sethos can’t help but think Cyno would made an amazing leader for the temple, with his strong sense of justice and his outstanding strength, but also thanks to his generosity and quirky humor. The children would love him and the elders would find him reliable and fair.
For a moment Sethos wonders if Cyno became the person he is because of Hermanubis or despite Hermanubis. He has never lost contact with his human side and instead created a connection with the spirit to be assisted in time of need.
Sethos spent years trying to tame that power, he thought he deserved it, that the fragment was defining him and that it served as a proof of his worth. Only now he understands how much he was leaning onto the power to survive, because if Sethos wasn’t a vessel, he didn’t know who he really was.
Losing the fragment didn’t hurt as much as realizing he had lost himself.
“I need to prepare for the journey, feel free to order more drinks and food if you want. I’ll tell Enteka to put everything on my tab.”
With a curt nod, Cyno walks away leaving Sethos with his own thoughts.
He doesn’t feel like staying at the café, he can feel his insecurities resurfacing and he needs a distraction before he starts to overthink. Even more.
There’s a soft breeze when he exits the building, Sethos inhales deeply recognizing the aroma of Sumeru roses and sweet flowers. The sun is setting, coloring the sky with shades of orange and pink, the same sky he used to stare at from the desert on windy afternoons.
The wave of nostalgia isn’t unexpected but it leaves Sethos breathless nonetheless. In an attempt to soothe his soul he walks all the way to the entrance of the Akademiya, greeting the few scholars still wandering around up to Razan Garden. Luckily his collaboration with the Akademiya granted him a special pass to enter any common space of the institute and he wastes no time reaching the highest point of the Garden, climbing on a robust branch of the Divine Tree.
It’s a great spot to rest after lunch covered by the tree foliage and an even greater spot for when Sethos needs to detach from the bustling of the city. It’s Cyno who introduced him to this place the first time Sethos visited the Akademiya, he immediately found it comforting but it also seemed to hold a special meaning for his friend so Sethos always makes sure to at least climb on a different branch. What he really likes about that spot is the amazing panorama extending in front of it, the way he can observe people running around the city during the day and the fact almost no one ever goes there past lecture time.
Almost. Because there’s one person popping up whenever Sethos is laying on top of the tree.
“Busy day again?”
As expected.
Sethos slightly turns to his right, taking into view the most eccentric hat he has come to know in the past weeks and deep indigo eyes.
“It’s always a busy day when I’m in the city.”
The other person scoffs, failing to hide his grin. There’s nothing funny about their conversation but somehow the mere presence of that guy is enough to distract Sethos from his thoughts and finally relax.
Hat Guy is definitely not his real name but nobody in the city seems to know him beside the Dendro Archon, which is weird and suspicious and Sethos has always been too curious for his own good. Curiosity is, indeed, what brought him to approach Hat Guy at first, following the blue fabrics fluttering behind him with attentive eyes and observing that original hat up close during lucky days, when Hat Guy was in a good enough mood to let Sethos bother him.
Whenever he shows up in town, Sumeru vendors awkwardly try to catch his attention only to call him unapproachable once they’re ignored. Sethos thinks there are no unapproachable people, only people who don’t know the right way to approach.
Lucky him. That’s Sethos specialty!
It doesn’t matter if it took several weeks and chases before Hat Guy seemed to give in and accept to have little talks with the new ‘errand-boy’, or the fact he showed interest for the first time by implying he knew Sethos more than he was supposed to.
“I'd say you're no errand boy at all. You've got a more important role.” He had said with that signature smirk of his and, in all honesty, Sethos knew he should have been worried about those words, but the excitement inside him only grew the moment he realized Hat Guy must have done researches about him. Possibly through files and documents only accessible to a Sage. He surely also had a more important role than just a student.
During his following trips to Sumeru City, Sethos tried to gather as much data about the man as possible. He observed closely the way he dressed, his eccentric hat, his accent, not to mention how he was absolutely dazed every time Hat Guy decided to fly instead of walking. One time he was staring so intently even Nahida took pity on him and confided that Hat Guy was a newcomer in the city under her care.
To be the Dendro Archon’s protégé means you did something extremely right.
Or extremely wrong.
Since then Sethos has always spared some time to meet (or chase) the guy any time he was around the Akademiya, learning his favorite rest places and routine. It’s not like he can’t see the boundaries Hat Guy has raised, Sethos respects his privacy and feelings but sometimes the teasing is hard to control. Especially when it’s so clear that the sarcastic tone and annoyed snorts hide more than Hat Guy wants to show and, damn, Sethos wants to know. He wants to break wall after wall until all is left is trust and a new-formed bond.
Why?
Because in all of Sumeru City, Hat Guy seems to be the only person with no expectations about him. The only one who sees Sethos for what he is, doesn’t judge him for trying to fit in and doesn’t care if he sways from his role or not.
“What brings you here this time?”
Hat Guy sits next to him, pushing the hat a bit to uncover his eyes. He looks relaxed and uninterested, even though the way he’s staring at the sun setting is a little melancholic.
“You know the documents I deliver are, uhm, secret.”
“I mean what brings you on this tree when everyone else is-” a quick nod is directed towards the street below “there.”
Trust Hat Guy to act disinterested and then notice details nobody else would have noticed. Sethos is flattered although a bit itchy that he’s been exposed but he guesses it’s not an actual secret that he likes company and crowded places.
Still Hat Guy doesn’t need to know about his turmoil, that’s a burden he’s supposed to carry alone as every leader of the temple should.
“I was missing you”
He opts to say in the end, knowing too well that the comment won’t be well-received. He doesn’t mind, seeing Hat Guy rolling his eyes and shifting his weight a little further is a cute reward. Hat Guy can try to run away but Sethos swears that by the time he officially takes the lead of the temple, he’ll be able to melt that grumpy face into a smile. Or a grimace, either work.
“Sure. Why did I even bother…”
The silence that follows is comfortable.
There’s something about Hat Guy that Sethos can’t quite describe in words. Despite its name, the Temple of Silence is almost never silent, people flood common areas at any hour of the day and, like that, Sethos grew up used to the constant buzzing of voices, while silence requested him to come up with new tales and anecdotes before the situation turned awkward.
Hat Guy was often silent, but it was never awkward.
As if words were not needed, because Sethos doesn’t have a reason to please or impress the other, he doesn’t have to prove himself or hide the fact he feels like wandering instead of living. He and Hat Guy are simply sitting together on a tree, looking in front of them at the horizon with the same lingering sight, lost and foreign to the city and still finding the slight comfort in sharing that moment, that spot, together.
They’re so different Sethos can’t understand why he sees so much of himself in that man.
“You come from Inazuma, right?”
Sethos asks, daring a quick glance at his side.
The huge hat is hiding Hat Guy’s face but his shoulder flinches, almost imperceptibly.
“Why?”
For the first time Sethos notices a small crack in the other’s voice. He’s used to seeing Hat Guy getting defensive over small teasing but this time it’s different, there’s something off. He decides to ignore it and avoid any question that might sound too personal.
“There’s a place in the desert, at the very far end. A place that stands above the ocean and from there you can have a glimpse of Fontaine. There are waterfalls and ships and mountains, it looks great and exotic.” Images of said place run across Sethos’ mind, he remembers the first time he reached that peak and his eyes welcomed the enormous waterfall park and the tall tower in the middle. He had been struck. “I have often stopped to admire the view but my duties have always kept me from going there. I’d love to visit Fontaine or Inazuma or just any place that isn’t all sand or trees.”
Sethos thinks how easy it would be for Hat Guy to fly from the desert to Fontaine, the freedom he must have to be in any place he wants whenever he wants. Yet, Hat Guy seems to only roam around the city, sometimes traveling as far as the border with the desert but never beyond (Sethos has interrogated several Eremites about a blue flying object and everyone was equally clueless). Doesn’t he miss Inazuma?
Sethos misses the temple more than he wants to admit. Maybe Hat Guy is just like him, he misses home but needs to find himself before going back.
Indigo eyes turn briefly towards him, interrupting his trail of thoughts.
“Why don’t you take some time off to travel?”
Of course Hat Guy would ask, it’s such an obvious question.
How is Sethos supposed to explain that although it’s what he wishes the most, every single step from the temple feels like he’s leaving his people behind? Selfish, insecure, eager Sethos who received all the help he needed to become a leader and is now retreating in the forest to escape a duty he doesn’t believe he deserves.
The Akademiya has been a good excuse to take a break while still doing his job but a trip abroad would be unjustifiable.
Once again Sethos can’t put his thoughts into words, he swallows back his guilt and shares a small smile.
“Would you come with me then?”
It’s supposed to break the heavy atmosphere, to make Hat Guy roll his eyes and shift even further to show his annoyance.
Nothing of the sort happens.
Hat Guy watches him without any emotion, sitting still and keeping his lips shut together. His lashes flutter for a millisecond and a chill runs up Sethos’ spine, sensing dark eyes boring into him in a way he has never experienced before. For a moment he feels naked and exposed.
Still Hat Guy doesn’t comment and after a few more minutes of silence, the man fixes his hat and sighs. One moment he’s relaxing his shoulders and the next Sethos is staring at the empty spot beside him.
The sky has turned a dark shade of purple and black, a few leaves are falling from the top branch like some force flew a little too close to them. Sethos takes a leaf in his hand and smiles.
He has no reason to be disappointed, this is exactly how things have to go. His silly teasing was exactly that, a tease. Sethos never expected it to be taken as anything else so he tries to suppress the sense of betrayal that threatens to rise up his chest, as if Hat Guy could have possibly saved him from his own duty and fate.
Nobody can help him because Sethos doesn’t need help, he only needs to grow up and face his leader's responsibilities, even if they seem more like a cage than a blessing.
Stars aren’t much visible from the city but Sethos stares up at the sky recognizing the faint light of some major constellations. Back in the desert he would use stars to find the way back home, but in the present there’s no star able to lead his path, not until Sethos figures out where he wants to go, who he wants to be.
He only needs a sign, a little push towards the right direction.
A sudden breeze hits Sethos’ right cheek. The scent of foliage and incense forces him to turn and face Hat Guy standing in front of him as if he didn’t leave only a few minutes before. The man is slightly breathless and his hat is missing.
Sethos observes him confused and a little amused, raising an eyebrow to quietly ask why the guy has returned.
“Tomorrow. 7AM by the pier. Don’t be late.”
It takes Sethos completely off guard, making him widen his eyes and mouth unable to put a sense on those words.
“I work tomorrow morning.” He says in the end, still confused.
“I know. You’ll accompany me.”
Sethos is handed a paper and, after a careful inspection, he gapes at the sigil placed at the bottom. The Dendro Archon has signed an urgent request for a message delivery in Fontaine, Sethos’ name is written as the main carrier right above Hat Guy’s.
He has to blink several times to make sure he isn’t dreaming, the letter is really requesting him for a job in another region and it doesn’t make sense because Sethos had plans to meet Nahida the following day to discuss a faux organization created at the Akademiya.
It doesn’t make sense until it does, because Hat Guy is shifting on his feet like he’s annoyed for showing sympathy and suddenly the dots connect themselves: who else in Sumeru City could have the same influence on the Dandro Archon?
“You-”
Sethos is still trying to realize what happened. He’s almost shy to look at the other guy, he can feel his ears flushing and heart racing, wondering again if Hat Guy can see through him despite Sethos’ biggest effort to conceal his worries.
In the end he closes his eyes and nods.
“Thank you. I mean it.”
There’s nothing more to add, Sethos asked for a sign and it appeared faster than he expected.
Hat Guy shrugs and brushes his clothes before flying away in the darkness, leaving behind a new whiff of leaves and incense. Now that Sethos pays attention to it, it’s the same incense used in The Sanctuary of Surasthana and it inevitably rips another smile from the guy.
Fontaine…
As Sethos climbs off the tree he cannot help but feel excited about the upcoming job, and deep inside, he’s glad Hay Guy will be his mate during their delivery.
.
.
.
Things I want to do before becoming a leader:
- I want to visit new places
- [...]
(continue)