Chapter Text
All of human existence has led to very little in the grand scheme of things. A mere blip on the cosmic radar and even less interdimensionally. This is fairly common knowledge to essentially everyone but the humans themselves. They are blissfully unaware of such things and spend their meaningless existence distracted by things that are even less relevant than themselves.
In the case of the nearest human, she was discussing the weather.
“Sure was a lot of rain last night,” she said, pouring a cup of coffee. This was a typical behavior for someone working as a waitress in a cafe. “The wind knocked a branch off the tree near mine.”
The patron however was not a typical patron. Not anymore at least. She looked up at the waitress, whose name was apparently Jennifer, with dark emotionless eyes. She idly contemplated what her liver tasted like.
“You waiting on someone or are you here solo?” Jennifer asked.
“I am waiting,” the customer replied. “He is late.”
“Ooh a he . Well I’ll be right here if you need anything.” Jennifer winked and left the table.
If the customer needed anything, Jennifer the waitress would be of no use. But it was unlikely as long as he was kept entertained. Even if this body died, a new one could be acquired.
The coffee was hot enough to burn the inside of her mouth but the wounds healed fast enough not to matter. A woman began smoking at the table next to her. The customer stared intently at the door, an immovable object.
The radio announced him, letting out a burst of static as he scanned the room. If she didn’t know better she would say he almost fit in amongst these humans but he was always good at that. The current body wore a suit from many decades before and a cheap plastic crown from a restaurant down the street.
“Shelly!” he cried and flung himself into the metal chair with enough force to nearly topple it. Perhaps it was and it simply didn’t topple. “Oh how has it been? You look different than the last time I saw you- I must say I like this one better. Has a classic flair to it.”
“I would hardly call the 1930s classic.”
“Oh but things have changed so much, Shelly! They invented the synthesizer. And… I’m sure other things.”
She laughed again and sipped the coffee.
Jennifer appeared, “Is there anything I can get for you? Our coffee is made fresh!” She smiled at him.
“Oh no, I just ate. Just here to catch up with my old pal, Shelly here.” He smiled in the way he did when he was about to play a game.
Jennifer shrugged and left. If she were clever about it she would have run but humans are so rarely clever.
“So why’d you bring me here, Akabatilath? Some new scheme of yours?”
“Names have power, old friend. Best not use mine or I’ll use yours. But I brought you here because there have been rumors that you’ve been a bit… bored.”
“What’s your solution? If it’s the same one as it was in 1375, I’m afraid the answer’s a hard no . There are only so many times I can get disemboweled before it really starts losing its charm ”
“I want to propose a game.”
He cocked his head, considering.
“Do you remember Sasha Sparrow?”
His lip curled, all the answer that was needed.
“It turns out she still has some descendants left-”
He had turned around to the woman who was smoking and said something to her that made her blanch.
The customer cleared her throat and he turned around. “Oh right, I think I will have something to eat.” he waved for Jennifer again. “Hello, I would like the mozzarella sticks.”
Jennifer nodded and left.
“They go well with a smokey flavor,” he said, as if letting the customer in on a secret.
“As I was saying, Sasha Sparrow has a few living descendants left. I was wondering if you would like to play a game. If you can convince one of them to join one of your little groups - ”
“-they’re cults, Shelly, let’s not split hairs. But go on.”
“You can get them to try to summon you properly with whatever knowledge their ancestor left behind.”
“Oh that does sound promising. And if you win?”
“I get a new vessel and all the knowledge in it. And of course the joy of watching you fail.”
He chuckled in a way that didn’t quite work with the vocal cords he had acquired. “I don’t fail, that’s why I’m bored . But very well, wager accepted I suppose.”
Jennifer gave him the mozzarella sticks and he ate one instantly making eye contact all the while.
“Do you want to know exactly how your mother’s going to die?” he asked conversationally.
Jennifer took a step back.
“How about everything else?”
Jennifer screamed, clutching her head as blood dripped from her ears.
“So fragile aren’t they. Now, you, with the cigarette- did you know they make your lungs taste smokey?”
The customer left him to his game. There was work to do.