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Kara couldn’t keep it in any longer.
She had to tell her. She had to tell Lena. The only question was how. How could she tell Lena without
ruining everything that they had built?
The answer wasn’t even really an answer. She wasn’t planning on it turning out this way, but Kara was
never good at keeping secrets anyways.
“Lena?” Kara said, after the door was opened.
“Kara! I didn’t expect you to come by. Is everything alright?”
Lena looked amazing, as she always did. Dressed to the nines, at least that’s what Kara thought. Lena
was always… wow. Rao, help her. Yeah, the dress that Lena was not helping. Kara needed to get it
together.
“I wanted to talk to you.”
Lena raised an eyebrow but gestured for her to come inside. Kara took in her surroundings, like she
normally did, even though she had been in Lena’s penthouse so many times before. The open window
to the balcony, the pillows on the couch. The couch where Kara and Lena had spent so many nights
together, close as possible as friends, watching some romantic comedy that Kara had begged to put on.
Kara tried to summon some of her Supergirl confidence but failed. She played with her hands, unsure of
how to start. Unsure if she could even look at Lena.
“Kara?”
Lena’s voice brought Kara out of her head. She blinked, looking at Lena. Kind, caring Lena. Her best
friend. Her… Kara cut off that line of thought.
“You’re going to hate me,” Kara started, pacing the expanse that was Lena’s front room of her
penthouse.
“There’s nothing that you could say that could ever make me hate you,” Lena gently said, more gently
than Kara deserved. Too gently. Because that was what Lena was. Gentle with Kara, always gentle.
Always looking out for Kara. And now she was about to ruin it all.
Kara took a deep breath. This was now or never.
“I’m Supergirl.”
There was a moment of silence. It felt like it went on for years. It felt like Kara was in the Phantom Zone
again, waiting. Waiting for anything. Lena didn’t show any emotion. Didn’t say anything. It was like
everything was frozen in time. Lena was frozen, as was Kara. It felt like eternity. An eternity that Kara
could not stand, even though she had come to terms that she would outlive everyone. Even Alex. But
this… this was something different. She tried to not listen to Lena’s heartbeat but it was impossible. It
was racing ever since she said those two words. She just couldn’t figure out if it was good or not.
Usually, she was well versed in knowing what Lena was feeling, what she was thinking. But this was
something completely different.
“You’re… Supergirl?” Lena finally speaks. It’s a whisper. Barely a whisper. But Kara hears it. She would
always hear what Lena said.
“I am,” Kara says, her voice not wavering. Stronger than she feels. She slowly unbuttons her blouse,
catching the way that Lena’s eyes go wide. She would always notice anything about Lena.
She takes off her glasses and removes her hair from the ponytail that she was wearing. Her blonde hair
fell around her shoulders. Underneath her blouse is her suit. It was always there. Might as well show it
all. She unbuttoned the first few buttons, showing the blue suit that had her house crest on it.
“You deserve to know.”
As nervous as Kara was, she knew that Lena wouldn’t hurt her. Lena was her best friend, if not her…
Kara shakes herself mentally. Now was not the time, if ever, after this. It was already too much telling
her that she was Supergirl. That she lied to her for years. Lied to her best friend, even if she had wanted
more.
“Please say something,” Kara whispers.
Lena had done nothing but stared. Stared at her with wide eyes and Kara couldn’t make out the feelings
that lied underneath, even if she had known her for years. It was like Lena was at war with herself. And
that alone killed Kara. She did this to Lena. She lied to her. She knew what Luthor’s were like, even if
Lena was not like them. Luthor’s hurt. They lied. They betrayed. And that’s what Kara did to Lena. She
lied. For years.
Rao, Kara thought. I know Lena deserved to know, but this hurts more than I thought it would.
Finally, Lena spoke. “I know I said that I wouldn’t hate you.” Kara could tell that she took a deep breath.
Controlling what she was about to say. “But this hurts me more than you could ever know.”
The admission nearly took Kara to her knees. She knew that this would happen. She had been lying to
Lena for years. Lena was so scared to let Kara in in the first place. Lena, who was burned by her family so
many times over, not only by Lex, but by Kal. Because she was a Luthor.
“I-I wanted to tell you, trust me,” Kara felt herself scrambling. Scrambling to salvage anything, anything
she could do to save her soul- Kara shut down that thought immediately. Now was not the time. Or was now the time?
“It’s not your name. I promise that it’s not, I swear. I wanted to tell you; I did. It killed me every single
day. You love Kara and I want you to love Supergirl too. But then everything happened with Supergirl
and I couldn’t tell you anymore because you were mad at Supergirl but not mad at Kara and I didn’t
want to lose you at all, I already lost you with Supergirl no matter what I tried to do and-"
Kara cut herself off. She was rambling. This wasn’t about her, it never was. And she was here as Kara,
wasn’t she? Her suit might be underneath her clothing but that didn’t matter. It couldn’t matter. She
came to Lena as Kara. Just Kara. In Lena’s penthouse. About to pour her heart out. Tell her how much
she loved Lena. How much she was in love with Lena. Because she couldn’t keep it in any longer. The
lingering touches, the flirting that she was positive that was happening. Kara wasn’t always aware of
human customs but she knew that best friends didn’t just say things like “your dress really accentuates
your chest, darling,” without possibly knowing that Lena meant that more in a platonic way.
Lena seemed to be thinking, and Kara let her think. She didn’t want to push, as much as she wanted to
know what she was thinking. Briefly, she hoped for J’onn’s psychic abilities. But that would be infringing
on Lena’s privacy, and Kara would never do that.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Lena eventually asks.
Kara’s response was almost immediate. “I wanted to protect you.”
Lena’s response was almost as fast. “You know that I’m never safe. I almost always have a hit out on
me.”
Kara sighs. She’s right. Lena is always right. That’s why she always listens to her.
“Knowing that I’m Supergirl… it’s different than just Lex. It always will be. People will use you to get to
me. Especially if they know that you’re my soulmate.”
Kara freezes. She didn’t mean to say that. She hadn’t even said it to herself, not fully. She had just
wanted Lena to understand why she did what she did. But it was out there, and Lena only raised an
eyebrow.
“Soulmate?”
Kara tried to defuse the situation. “S-soulmate? Did I say that? What I meant was… uh…” she trailed off,
unable to come up with an excuse. Soulmates were rare on Krypton, Kara knew that. She never thought
that she would be part of the few that had someone, let alone a soulmate. Let alone a human soulmate,
at that. Knowing that Kara was Supergirl and was also Lena's soulmate was too much. Lena didn’t want
Kara. Or perhaps she did, before tonight. But she didn’t want Supergirl. And now Kara just messed up
even more.
Kara turned away. All of tonight was… too much. Too many emotions. She could feel it thrumming
underneath her skin, something that happened when things were too much. When she couldn’t hold
back her strength any longer. She fiddled with the hem of her sweater. But something that stood out to
her was Lena’s heartbeat. It was racing. Something about it was different. Different than when she had
said that she was Supergirl.
“Am I your soulmate, Kara?”
Kara whipped her head to Lena. She wasn’t expecting her to sound so small. So… what was that? Kind?
Hopeful? Kara shook her head. There wasn’t any way.
“I told you who I am because you deserve to know. Because I trust you. I have always trusted you. It was
never about your name. I don’t care that you’re a Luthor. I care about you, Lena,” Kara had to stop
herself from saying love, instead. I love you. I’m in love with you. Do you know what that means?
“I was tired of lying. And you needed to hear it from me. Not Lex, not the DEO, me.”
Lena started pacing her open living room. Kara let her, as much as she wanted to reach out and pull Lena
into her arms. It was nearly killing her. If her soulmate rejected her now, after she stupidly put that in
the open, Kara wasn’t sure what she was going to do. The power beneath her skin was already
becoming too much. She just wanted to tell Lena who she was, not all of her feelings. She could handle
Lena rejecting her as a friend. Rejecting her as a soulmate was something entirely different.
“Rao,” Kara muttered to herself.
Lena must have heard her because she stopped her pacing. Looked at Kara. It seemed like she was truly
looking at her for the first time. Kara didn’t look away. She couldn’t, not when those green eyes were
boring into her. Surprisingly, there didn’t seem to be anger there. Just… affection? That couldn’t be
right.
Lena slowly made her way over to Kara. Almost too slowly, like she was afraid to spook Kara. Fair
enough, considering Kara wanted nothing more than to just fly out of Lena’s open balcony window and
never return.
“What does being Supergirl’s soulmate mean?”
Well that certainly wasn’t the question that Kara was expecting.
“I… I, well, uh, on Krypton, soulmates are rare. Like, really rare. I wasn’t expecting to get a soulmate,
even being a part of the House of El. My mother always told me to not get my hopes up. And then I was
sent to Earth, I really didn’t think that there was any chance. Also, I definitely didn’t think that a human
soulmate was possible, not saying that I don’t not like that you’re a human, you’re really wonderful
actually and smart, and beautiful and-“
“Kara.” Lena stopped Kara’s rambling by putting a gentle hand on her arm.
Kara couldn’t help but blush. Her arm felt warm and tingly under Lena’s palm. “Sorry. Started rambling.
Anyways, I’m connected to you Lena. And you to me. I felt it when I first met you but I didn’t know what
it meant and then I started to get to know you and it all made sense. I wanted to tell you that I was
Supergirl, I promise. I’ve stayed up so many nights thinking of how I could tell you, and then Alex would
tell me that I couldn’t. I’m so, so sorry Lena. I never wanted to hurt you.”
“You did hurt me, Kara. I can’t say that you didn’t,” Lena said, albeit she didn’t sound angry. Kara
nodded, looking down at her own hands. “I’m going to need time to work through that. You lied to me
for years, no matter what your reasoning was. Also, this soulmate thing…” Lena trailed off and Kara
flicked her eyes up momentary. What she saw there nearly took her breath away. Lena was looking at
her with so much love and care that Kara didn’t know what to do. Maybe this was all a dream.
“You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting for you to say something along those lines,” she
whispered.
If Kara wasn’t breathing before, it was like her heart completely stopped. Can a Kryptonian’s heart stop
like that? “Y-you’ve been waiting?”
“Darling, have I been that subtle?” Lena said with a small smile. “I’ve been attracted to you since that
first day you entered my office. You brought my walls down. You’ve shown me what it means to feel
loved and how to love back. I just never knew how to tell you. I wasn’t sure if you even felt that way
about me, or women, even. I suppose soulmates make sense because of how strongly I feel about you.”
Darling. She still called her darling. Yeah, Kara’s heart has definitely stopped. She took a step forward,
steeling her nerves. She had to do this, at least once. She raised both of her hands slowly, surprised to
see them unwavering. Lena’s face was soft in her hands, softer than anything her imagination could’ve
come up with.
“Can I kiss you?”
Lena answered by moving closer, pressing her lips against Kara’s. Oh, Rao, was this the best thing that
Kara had ever experienced. Sparks seemed to erupt from everywhere. All too soon, Lena pulled away.
Kara slowly opened her eyes, slightly disappointed.
“You’re floating, Supergirl,” Lena said with a smirk, eyebrow raised.
She looked down. Lena was right. She was floating several inches off the ground. Now that had never
happened before. Her face flushed, embarrassed. She was still holding Lena’s face in her hands, and she
brushed her thumb across her cheek, coming back down to the floor.
“I guess there’s a lot that we need to talk about.”
“Yes, there is. Come and sit, darling.”
Kara followed Lena to the couch, knowing that she would follow Lena anywhere.