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Izzy was quite weary. Known him for almost two decades, yet he still doesn’t have Axl as his.
Today, they were shooting some of the music video for Don’t Cry, and Axl’s wretched girlfriend or fiancè or whatever was starting to piss Izzy off. Stephanie Seymour, the snootiest bitch there every was. Izzy doesn’t understand how Axl fell in love with her. Not at all.
He had been watching her all day. Stephanie kept giving him side glances as well, almost as if she were telling him to back off, like she owned Axl. Izzy had disheartening news to her, however, because no, she does not own Axl. Izzy believes its a control thing with her, that she cannot fathom the thought of not being in control of Axl.
Izzy hated it. Axl never hung out with his friends anymore, he always had something to do with Stephanie. It felt as if he did not care about his bandmates anymore, but instead a girl was better than all of them. Izzy knew that wasn’t the case, though.
It was Stephanie. Stephanie was doing something to him, and it was making him sick.
He had calmed down a little, watching the two getting ready to shoot this next scene. Their hands were entertwined, and Stephanie was slightly taller than Axl, so Izzy wondered if they would keep it that way. The scene started, and it was meant to give the illusion that Stephanie was swinging Axl into the wall, but she actually did it.
Axl was slung against the dresser, and his head collided with the wall and made a picture fall. Izzy knows she did it on purpose, and it pissed him off to no end.
(She didn’t, but in Izzy’s angry head, yes the fuck she did.)
Stephanie tried to be overly sweet, asking Axl if he was okay, all while holding his waist, and Axl nodded and laughed softly, his smile a little strained. Then, he was back to laughing and joking.
“She kicked my ass!”
Acting as if that wasn’t a big deal.
Izzy saw the tighten in Duff’s jaw, and they met eyes. They were both thinking the same thing apparently, because Duff dragged him out of the room and started ranting.
“I know, Duff, I’m this close to fucking snapping!” Izzy agreed, throwing his hands up. Duff was absolutely fuming.
Izzy was surprised Slash wasn’t saying anything as well, given the fact that he was pretty protective over him. Stevie also.
“I’m fucking tired of this shit, Izzy. Everybody thinks she’s so perfect, so gorgeous, and she’s really fucking not!” He spat in a whisper yell, clutching at his hair. He was certain he was gonna explode.
“Like, she just slammed our lead singer into the wall. She’s taller than him, why the fuck is she doing that? He hit his head, Iz, God!”
Izzy smiled softly and shook his head just for a moment. Stephanie wasn’t as large as Duff was making her out to be.
Duff also found that he couldn’t calm down. It was hard to make him mad, but this got him. Fucking around with his lead singer is not going to cut it for him. For any of them. The others just haven’t realized it yet.
“If she does one more thing, Izzy, I swear ’m gonna kill her.” He gripped Izzy’s shoulders, suddenly looking exhausted.
Izzy sighed. “Can’t do that, Duffles.”
He pulled Duff into a gentle hug, feeling the exhaustion as well. Izzy didn’t know that Duff was also sick of Stephanie, he thought that he liked her just like everyone else did.
“Just tired of it.” The blonde mumbled.
“I know, Duff. I’m with you. I’m tired of watching my best friend get treated like.. like an object.” He wasn’t lying; Axl was being treated as if he were nothing more than a servant for Stephanie. That’s what broke Izzy’s heart.
Axl has always wanted a long lasting relationship. He and Stephanie were engaged now. He’s trying so hard to do everything right, and he thinks he’s doing everything right, and he is. All he wants is for someone to love him, for someone to cherish him.
He wants a family. Axl planned from the beginning that after the band finished, he wanted to settle down with a girl and have kids. He wanted to give his kids the life he never had.
The only problem is that Axl is with the wrong girl. And Izzy.. Izzy loves him. Izzy doesn’t particularly want a family, he just wants someone to love.
That’s all that was on his mind when he and Duff walked back out. Everyone was walking out, heading to the pool to shoot the next scene for the day. So that’s where Izzy and Duff went as well. They were already shooting the scene, with Axl and Stephanie underwater.
When it was over, Stephanie took tons of large towels and left one smaller one for Axl. It wasn’t super warm outside.. at all.
“What the fuck?” Izzy damn near choked on his own spit. Axl was by her again, taking pictures with her, but he was shivering. Everyone looked a little taken aback, Izzy noticed. Axl looked miserable.
Duff was so angry next to him that he was shaking. Just to calm him down, Izzy placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. “I’ll be right back.” He growled, stomping off towards the pair.
No. Breathe, Izzy.
“You look good.” He calmed himself down and spoke sweetly to Axl, smiling softly at his redhead. But then his expression soured, and he tried to make it look playful as he met Stephanie’s gaze. “You don’t, though.”
Axl playfully pushed him, just to defend his fiancè. Izzy played into it, trying to not show that he was serious and was actually pissed. But then he went to wrap Axl’s towel around him tighter, but found that it was drenched. That was what was making him so cold.
Izzy prevented his jaw from dropping and searched for another towel around the area. There were none.
When Izzy turned back, Axl and Stephanie were kissing, making him wrinkle his nose. She was such an ass kisser, trying to make herself look so good in front of everyone. Izzy just turned around and walked back to the house with everyone else for dinner, walking next to Duff.
Stupid brown nosed ass bitch.
Duff was still mad. He was still shaking. “I’ve never wanted to beat a woman so badly before, man,” He spat, clenching his teeth. “Am I wrong?”
Izzy shook his head. “I don’t think so. But don’t beat her Duff, I can’t really vouch for you if you get put in prison.”
They both laughed.
Axl was freezing. His hair was damp and his teeth chattered. He was shivering, and everybody could see it, they just did not say anything.
And it was no secret that Stephanie Seymour was a piece of work. A pain in the ass, to be honest. All she did was use him for her own gain. She may have been a pretty girl (not in Duff or Izzy’s mind,) and she may be able to attract men, but she used them.
She used all men like toys. Like a toddler. She plays with them, and then when she grows bored of them, she tosses them out like garbage to find a new one.
He sighed when he got in, tucking a strand of wavy hair behind his ear. He was gonna have to do some restraightening tomorrow. Axl was not going to be seen out of bed tomorrow with his hair looking like this.
He hated it. He had no clue that Izzy loved when his hair was wavy, because it really was gorgeous the way it was. And he had no clue that Izzy wished he would embrace his natural hair.
Axl bit his lip and trembled all the way to the bathroom.
Izzy had already started eating, and was finishing up by the time Axl and Stephanie came out in regular clothes. Axl was wearing one of Izzy’s sweatshirts and short shorts. The guitarist softened at that, his shoulders slumping in the way that they do when he loses himself in his head.
Axl’s hair was damp, hanging down his back and his bangs actually hanging over his forehead instead of being pushed back. It was obvious he’d brushed it very throughly, cause it looked good and sleek. His natural waves were coming back since his hair got wet in all that chlorine.
Everything was okay. Axl was fixing his food, and was going to sit down, but all the seats were taken up in the dining room. So, he went back to sit in the living room, but of course, when he went to sit down, Stephanie snatched up the last seat when she saw Axl coming. The couch was taken up, everything was full, from the crew members, Axl’s friends, and the band.
Izzy squeezed Duff’s knee in reassurance. “It’s okay.”
Izzy watched Axl purse his lips and sit on the floor uncomfortably. The singer had been doing shit all day, he had more scenes than Stephanie, he’s probably tired and is ready to sleep!
Izzy scoffed beneath his breath. Tomorrow he has to actually somewhat seriously act in a scene, get painted green, deal with birds, and get in the pool again.
He was about to let Axl come sit in his spot, but he and Stephanie were.. arguing? Everyone went silent.
He actually started with her.
“So I’m inconsiderate because I didn’t give you my seat?” She tilted her head, genuinely looking confused.
“You looked at me Stephanie, there’s no way you didn’t realize that I was coming to sit down. I’m sore, I’ve been doing shit all day.” Axl looked up at her with pitiful looking eyes. He just sounded exhausted, hollow. “So yes, that’s inconsiderate.”
Stephanie looked flabbergasted, as if she could do no wrong.
“I’m the female in the relationship Axl! You shouldn’t be mad that I want to sit down, because men are supposed to sacrifice that for their girls! Men aren’t supposed to make their girls sit on the floor, they should be the ones sitting on the floor! Honestly, I shouldn’t have fixed my own food!”
Axl recoiled back. “So I’m essentially not allowed the same rights? What is this, 1785? Am I your fucking slave? What the fuck, Stephanie?”
“That’s not what I said!” Stephanie shook her head, eyes widening, looking around the room nervously. Izzy winced. Axl was quick to argue, and it was clear that he was done playing around with Stephanie.
Izzy wasn’t complaining.
“That is basically what you just said! I’m supposed to fix your food for you? I’m supposed to sit down on the floor for you with no complaints? What else do I have to do for you, master? Lick the gum and dirt off the bottom of your shoes?”
It was just a back and forth thing. Izzy was sure that it was never going to end.
Until Stephanie took a jab at Axl’s childhood. He was holding up well with his comebacks, but that was low.
It made Axl explode.
“I know I’m not wanted, Stephanie, I know I am not enough! You’ve made it quite clear, time after time! My childhood is a great subject, that was awesome of you!” Axl spat back, gripping at the carpet he was sitting at, his knuckles white.
He was almost shaking, he was angry. Everyone turned to look at the pair, watching the whole thing go down. Axl wrapped his arms around himself, eyes burning.
“All my life, I’ve asked for one person to love me. My daddy ain’t want me, neither did my step-daddy, nor my mama. My sister and brother were all I had, and now I barely see them anymore.” Axl spoke softly.
“Nobody in my life has ever loved me. I never had basic motherly love bestowed upon me. I never had a mother to look up to, so I don’t know how how to properly treat a woman. I’m just trying to do the opposite of my daddy.”
”I never had a father to play catch with me or take me fishing or take me on simple joy rides around the neighborhood. I didn’t have that! That’s all I ever wanted, Stephanie, and that’s what you had! I didn’t fucking have that!” Axl could not stop the way his voice broke.
“And don’t fucking cry, don’t fucking manipulate me. I’m not as stupid as you think.” His voice was weak. He couldn’t stop it from wavering and cracking.
“Nobody ever wanted me in their life. You are the one person who I expected to love me, to want me. I guess I was horribly wrong, wasn’t I?” He looked at Stephanie with a crumpled face, letting tears slip down his cheeks and connect at his chin.
“Axl, I’m sorry,” Stephanie whimpered and reached out for the singer, but he stood up and stepped back.
“I had to watch that bastard beat my siblings, I had to watch him beat my mother, I had to endure those beatings myself! I still have the physical scars, I still have the mental scars, I still have the trauma, I can still feel his hands on me! I can remember exactly where each shard of glass was buried into me every time he threw a bottle at me!” Axl was breaking down, slowly, yet surely.
Izzy heard a sniffle from next to him.
Duff was crying. Damn.
Izzy moved over to rest his head on Duff’s shoulder comfortingly. “I know.” Izzy understood it all too well, because the first time Axl opened up, Izzy cried too. He’d never admit it outright though.
“And when I called for mom to help me, she never did. She sat there and she shut herself away from me, she never met my eyes when I cried for her. She never held me when I wanted her to. My only source of goddamn comfort was my pillow.”
Axl shrunk into himself, and a small sob was let out as he took more steps back, seemingly hiding himself from the world.
Stephanie wasn’t crying audibly, but she had a hand over her mouth, and her eyes were puffy from the strain of holding tears back. Actually, there wasn’t very many dry eyes in the room. Izzy was one of the only ones who wasn’t crying.
“You’ll never understand, you’ll never— you’ll never fucking know.” Axl gave up. It was just too much for him to handle, too much for him to hold in. He stumbled slightly, unable to see through the blur in his eyes, and ran outside.
Izzy stood up, running after Axl. He caught up to him in no time, finding him curled in a lounge chair by the pool. The lower half of his face was hidden in his knees, the lights casting a blue hue on his face, illuminating the wetness on it.
“Hey.” Izzy sat in the same seat as Axl, forcing the redhead to sit on the long part. Axl looked at him, and then his face crumpled, so he leaned forward with his hands over his face and buried it into Izzy’s shoulder. Izzy leaned down and rested his head on Axl’s shoulder.
“I’m here.” Izzy murmured. He made sure his voice was as soothing as possible, trying to calm Axl. His cries were muffled against Izzy’s shirt, and his tears were even seeping through his own fingers to soak it, but Izzy didn’t mind. Not at all.
“Am I wrong? Am I fucking wrong?” The redhead pulled back to meet Izzy’s eyes, letting his sleeves fall over his hands so he could wipe his face.
Izzy shook his head. “No, you’re not fucking wrong. She said something way out of line, and you responded. You made her realize what she did was terribly wrong.” Izzy helped him clean his face, batting his hands away, fanning his eyes to help him out a bit.
Axl sniffled. “I’m just really tired Izzy. I don’t know what I’ve done wrong. I’ve been tryin’ so hard to treat her right, I’ve been tryin’ to buy her what she wants and make her happy, but it’s never enough. Maybe I’m just incapable of making anyone happy.”
“No, that’s not true. You make me happy,” Izzy looked up shyly.
He wasn’t used to admitting how he felt. Hell, he could go years without talking about his feelings. But Axl sometimes just brought it out of him.
“How?”
“Just.. you. Anything that puts a smile on your face makes me happy, anything that you do makes me happy.”
Axl smiled.
“Even when I’m acting like a bitch?”
Izzy did as well. “…Sometimes.” He laughed. Axl leaned forward and rested his head on Izzy’s shoulder, sighing shakily. He was thankful that he had Izzy in his life. He was the only person that Axl didn’t ever doubt that he was safe with, even when he was in the peak of his addiction. Izzy made him feel confident and reassured, because Izzy was always there to rescue him.
“Thank you.” Axl pressed the most gentle kiss against Izzy’s cheek, making him freeze. Izzy wrapped both arms around Axl this time and felt his own eyes burn with the threat of oncoming tears. Of course it would be a kiss that would make him cry.
“Yeah.” Although his throat was tight, his voice came out strong.
That’s all that mattered.