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“Heda,” Indra paused at the entryway to the Commander's throne room, one hand clutching at the hilt of her sword while the other hung uselessly at her side, her eyes locked on the forlorn expression etched onto the Commander's face. “We cannot wait.”
“I know.” Lexa answered letting a long sigh leave her lips. The dark haired woman ran the palms of her hands across her thighs before bracing them against her knees as she rose out of her throne. “Wanheda is too important to lock away.”
“She...” Indra frowned, biting the inside of her cheek, her eyes roaming across Lexa's face inquiringly searching out the woman's emotions. “She is strong Heda.”
Lexa let her eyebrow raise and a small puff of amusement leave her lips before shaking her head. “No, Indra, she is not.” She murmured slid the scabbard of her sword onto her hip and affixed it to the leather of her belt. “Her heart is broken—but the events of the Mountain, and the pressures of leadership on a woman that never expected it. Did you know that she, and the other children that came before the adults, were each meant to die up in the Sky?”
“Die, Heda?” The General asked questioningly. She slipped easily into step at Lexa's side as the Commander strode out of her throne room and down the corridors of the Tower.
“Prisoners,” Lexa answered. “Each of them were prisoners on the Ark, sent to die so that others might live, Klark explained it to me as we awaited the signal. If they had not been sent to the ground it is likely that each one of them would have been released into space.”
Indra let her head dip into a nod while a frown marred her lips. “And their crimes?”
“We would have bled some,” Lexa admitted. “But others… Some stole food, some stole medicine, some were merely born.”
“What were Wanheda's crimes Heda?” Indra whispered.
“Klark crime was to love her people.” Lexa said. The dark haired woman came a halt in front of Clarke's bedroom, her eyes locked on the thick wood of the door, and her heart ached inside her chest. “She loved them enough to die for them, and despite their actions towards her, that has not changed. She is broken Indra, strong yes, but broken.”
Indra watched silently as Lexa depressed the handle of the door and slipped through the gap in the wooden barrier into Clarke's bedroom.
Lexa's eyes shifted across the furniture of Clarke's bedroom, searching between the wooden cabinets and around the cotton drapes for the blonde haired woman, only to find Clarke curled up in the middle of her bed of furs. Lexa's heart shuddered in her chest, aching for the younger woman, and she stepped across the room to perch on the edge of Clarke's bed. A whimper rose out of Clarke's mouth and struck Lexa's ears prompting the dark haired woman to reach out to brush the tips of her fingers across Clarke's forearm.
“I am sorry Klark,” She murmured as she smoothed her hand across the woman's side. “Your demons are tenacious beasts that I cannot fight for you.”
“Lexa,” Clarke's lips parted and the Commander's name slipped out of her mouth but her eyes did not open.
Lexa shifted her fingers to wipe the strands of blonde hair out of the woman's eyes. Her fingers fell to trace the curve of Clarke's cheekbone and the length of her jaw before returning to Lexa's lap.
“You are needed Klark,” Lexa said, a sigh escaping her lips at the thought of disturbing Clarke's almost peaceful sleep. “Slay your demons, and come back to me.”
“Lexa,” Clarke's eyelids fluttered open, deep blue eyes darting sideways to meet Lexa's forest green gaze, surprise and relief dancing across Clarke's face. “I...”
“What do you need Klark?” Lexa whispered, reaching out to curl her fingers around Clarke's searching hand. “I can fetch anything for you.”
“No.” Clarke shook her head sharply, her hand squeezing around Lexa's fingers as a desperate need to remain connected flared through her body. “Please, don't go.”
“I will stay if that is what you wish Klark.” Lexa murmured, adjusting the grip of her fingers to brush her thumb across the back of Clarke's hand comfortingly. “You are safe in Polis Klark, you are under the Commander's protection, there is no one hunting you here.”
“There is,” Clarke whispered pinching her eyes closed as tears welled up. “In my head.”
“You need to face your demons to defeat them Klark,” Lexa said, her voice soft and gentle. “But, you do not have to do it alone.”
“How do I fight them?” Clarke replied, twisting her body to bury her head in Lexa's thighs. “How do I make them go away?”
“You accept them.” Lexa answered with a soft brush of her fingers through Clarke's hair. “You realise that what you did you did for the love of your people, and you understand that you did not choose that path easily. If death has no cost, life has no worth. That is one of the sayings of my people, and you Clarke, you understand the cost of death but now you need to find the worth in life. Find it in your people, find it in your future, find it in proving to yourself that what you did you did because you wanted to save them.”
“I don't know if I can do that.” Clarke whimpered as a tear leaked out of her eye and slid down her cheek.
Lexa bent her head to press her lips against Clarke's forehead. “You will not be alone. I will be here every step of the way.”