Chapter Text
Annette frowned when the telltale ear-splitting squeaks from her straw signaled there was no more of her very expensive strawberry creme frappuccino left to stress chug.
“Finally ready to talk about why you summoned me?” Sylvain teased with a grin from the other side of the cafe table.
Unlike her, he had the entirety of his bergamot tea left to drink. The fact he’d ordered a large piping hot beverage at 7pm was concerning because it meant two things — he’d taken her s-o-s plea seriously and he had no intentions of leaving anytime soon.
Shoving her sad and empty cup to the side, she let out a long-drawn sigh.
She really needed to be more careful with what she wished for. Seriously.
“I… have a maybe-date tomorrow.”
“And is this a bad thing?” he asked, lifting the lid off his cup so he could put the tea bag on it.
“It’s…um, a thing?” she noncommittally answered with a shrug. When he tossed her a bemused look, she spared a few more details. “Ok, ok. I’m not sure if it’s a good thing or a bad thing.”
“And let me guess, you need my read on if they’re a potential scumbag?”
Annette winced. “You make it sound so much worse when you phrase it like that.”
“Relax, Annette. I’m not offended. I’m very well aware of what I bring to the table here.” he wryly said with a hearty chuckle. “Is your maybe-date a man or woman?”
“Man,” she answered. “Or, well… I think he’s a man?”
One of Sylvain’s eyebrows nearly disappeared into his hairline.
“What do you mean, think?” he said with a confused lilt. “Are you, like, trying to not make assumptions because you didn’t ask about pronouns or something?”
It was at this point that Annette wanted to melt into the lilac purple bench cushion. If only it was as simple an explanation as that. But alas, she was well aware that Sylvain’s help would only be effective if she gave him something to work with. And that meant sharing about… everything.
“I’m making assumptions based on my maybe-date’s Traveler Crossing avatar being a guy character and a few other little things.” she explained, her cheeks growing hotter with each word. Goddess, this was so embarrassing. “Don’t judge me, ok?”
Sylvain raised his palms up. “I’m not,” he said. “But I gotta say, I’m rather impressed that you managed to score through a game of all things. Pun very much intended.”
Annette didn’t hold back her groan between the pun and suggestive eyebrow wiggling. She should have expected that, honestly. No Sylvain heart-to-heart ever happened without at least one good natured bad joke being flung in her direction.
Still, if she had her way, he would have still been in the dark about that part but it was necessary to contextualize this incredibly strange scenario she was in. Not to say that playing Traveler Crossing was something to be ashamed of — the game didn’t have any questionable fanservice despite having a ton of options for customizing your traveler — but because she was still battling the residual guilt that came with allowing herself to play something for leisure instead of doing something productive.
All of her life, her family encouraged work over play. If it wasn’t furthering her education or work prospects, it was viewed as a waste of time in their eyes. So much so that the mere concept of owning a video game console was always something that felt out of reach for her, like to the point of feeling wrong even. But while she accepted her lot in life because her family did have her best interests at heart, Annette couldn’t quite snuff the faint tingle in the back of her mind about wanting to try playing a video game someday.
Then that fabled someday finally happened about a year back when she’d won a brand new console bundle through a charity raffle Mercie and her husband Dedue ran. She suspected the draw was rigged but, in the end, she was eternally thankful for Mercie’s meddling.
Not only did she realize that adding in a little extra play in her days wasn’t the end of the world but… it was thanks to them that she made some very good online friends during her quest to obtain the game’s coveted sakura blossom kimono outfit and 100% all of the trophies.
And well… assuming this teensy little red flag wasn’t an issue, she might have them to thank for even more than that if luck was on her side. It was the very reason she enlisted Sylvain’s help as the only person she knew who had some experience with online dating and, more importantly, as a male friend who wouldn’t sugarcoat things if agreeing to a maybe-date was a supremely-terrible idea.
Still, it didn’t make it any easier to say it out loud despite how desperately she needed this gut check to stop overthinking about this.
Annette inwardly sighed. Here went nothing.
“Sylvain, I’m going to preface this by saying that I’m meeting him in a public place tomorrow and I’ll have Mercie on speed-dial in case of emergency.”
“Good, good,” he said, taking a sip of his tea. “So what’s the problem you need help with?”
3… 2… 1…
“Should I be worried that his gamer handle is Dickpuncher42069?”
The tea practically shot through Sylvain’s nose before he started sputtering like a dying man.
Annette frowned. It didn’t take a genius to know that wasn’t a good sign.
“How did you… not get scared off… immediately?” he asked between coughs.
“I didn’t see his handle right away,” she explained. “All I saw was that his TC character’s name was Dagger. He helped me a lot each time he visited in Traveler Mode so I asked for his Player Link Code. I only saw it after he accepted.”
“...And he didn’t weird you out when you started chatting outside of the game?”
She shook her head. “No, not at all.” she said. “After a while I… kinda forgot how weird his username was because my brain kind of normalized it and I’d think things like, ‘oh, my good friend Dickpuncher is online!’”
“So I take it that something made you change your mind if you're asking me for advice?”
“Yeah,” she admitted. “I only remembered how weird it was when I had to say his handle aloud for the first time when I told Mercie my plans and she gave me one of those pitying looks she always gives when she’s worried.”
“Ah yes, I know those well,” Sylvain said with a light chuckle as he dared to take another sip of his tea. “Well, if you want my totally unbiased opinion as someone who loves ironic usernames, I’d say go for it and let good ol Dickpuncher’s actions do the talking. You never know if the name has to do with some inside joke or if he shares the account with a teenage edgelord.”
Annette blinked hard as a lightbulb went off in her head.
How had she forgotten that Sylvain’s own username for everything was sjg.so.sexiii because he paired it with a high school photo where he sported dated oval shaped glasses, braces and frosted blonde tips?
Maybe he did have a point. It couldn’t hurt to give him a chance if she had her bases covered and his TC character name was normal-ish when he could have written in Dickpuncher. The character count slots in the name input screen would have definitely allowed for that.
“Thanks for the different perspective, Sylvain,” she told him. “I feel a lot better about this.”
“Anytime,” he said with a warm smile, lifting his cup. “Get another drink so we can properly cheers.”
Annette giggled as she scooted sideways to get off the bench. “You don’t need to tell me twice!”
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Felix groaned when Sylvain’s name came up on his phone as he thumbed the hang up button before setting it back down on the hotel nightstand table beside him.
No matter how many times he told him, the fool still opted to call instead of text. It was infuriating.
So was his inability to take a hint when it started buzzing again not even two seconds after disconnecting.
If it weren’t for waiting on a few messages from Rallywind to confirm some last minute details for their meet-up tomorrow, he would have put the damn thing in airplane mode. Against better judgment (and options), he picked up the phone and accepted the call.
“Someone better be dying,” he sniped.
“Well, hello to you too.” Ugh. He could practically sense Sylvain’s grin through the phone. How annoying. “You should be more grateful you have a friend like me, you know.”
“Should I? I don’t see why calling me at 11 pm is something to be grateful for.”
“Because,” he began to preface. “I just saved you from getting ghosted. Or worse, friendzoned.”
“What are you talking about?”
“A little birdy told me about your date tomorrow with your gamer friend.”
Felix’s eyes widened. “Who told you about that? The Boar and Ingrid don’t play video games.”
“I have other friends, Felix,” he dryly pointed out. “My friend Annette told me who, you know, happens to be your pal Rallywind.”
He nearly dropped his phone.
“Wait. Rallywind is a woman?”
“Yes, and she’s a cute petite ginger woman, at that. Just your type.” he teased before flipping to a more matter-of-fact tone. “Did you two seriously not tell each other your real names?”
“No, it didn’t cross my mind,” he honestly answered. “I was more preoccupied with finding a suitable place to meet.”
“Fe, you’re killing me. You’re absolutely killing me right now,” he mock-complained. “Did you even pay attention when I said she thinks it’s a date?”
“I thought you meant a date like a regular scheduled outing?”
“No, I definitely would have used a different word if that’s what I meant.” he said, barely failing to hide his exasperation. “At any rate, I don’t know how you charmed her despite your ridiculous gamer handle but I’m giving you heads up that she’s probably going to ask about the name. I’m ok if you tell her that I was the one who messed with your account name as a prank.”
Felix was grateful Sylvain wasn’t physically in the room with him to see him visibly freeze up. Ten plus years later and the random reminders of the past still occasionally leveled him, even if they did get less frequent with time.
“Sylvain?” he eventually said after shaking off the temporary frost.
“Yes, Felix?”
“I appreciate the offer, but I’ll be fine.”
“I figured you’d say that but I thought I’d offer anyway,” he said before changing tacks. “Can I offer you one piece of advice though?”
“No.”
“Figured you’d say that too. Goodnight, Felix.”
“Night.”
When the call finally disconnected, Felix flopped backwards onto the king-sized mattress.
With all this new information swirling around his brain, Felix couldn’t fathom how he was going to get through tomorrow as he checked in on the gaming chat app he’d been conversing with Rallywind, er, Annette, with and saw she’d finally replied.
Rallywind [11:04 pm]: Sorry for the delay - I was out with a friend for longer than expected. I’m all good with the place & time you proposed.
Rallywind [11:05 pm]: I’m excited to finally meet you in-person tomorrow! 😺
And yet… after reading her responses, he immediately found himself recanting the thought as he slipped back into their familiar late-night routine with practiced ease.
Dickpuncher42069 [11:07 pm]: likewise.
Dickpuncher42069 [11:07 pm]: just one thing
Rallywind [11:07 pm]: ?
Dickpuncher42069 [11:07 pm]: my real name is Felix
Dickpuncher42069 [11:08 pm]: I figured you wouldn’t want to call me dickpuncher irl
Rallywind [11:10 pm]: knowing your real name almost feels wrong
Rallywind [11:10 pm]: but I guess it’s a necessary evil if we don’t want to get stares at the cafe
Rallywind [11:10 pm]: mine’s Annette - Annie for short
Rallywind [11:11 pm]: anyway, sorry for the short notice but I need to go to sleep - see you tomorrow Felix!
Upon reading those last few messages over and over, it was surreal to see her use his real name yet also feel incredibly wrong at the same time.
It was always the strangest thing to have a username you hated and yet it was one you couldn’t move away from because you unintentionally got used to it.
As he rolled off the bed in search of his pajamas, Felix hoped their meet-up tomorrow would feel far less strange by comparison.
The bar was on the floor, after all.