Work Text:
S: HGGKFKTOTOGOTLGLDLOEIJEJEBTRHFFJDJDKSJDJSJDKCOO CIIIFIEFIIRJFJRJFIFIIIRJDJFFNF IM FUGKING PREGANANANANT DEE FIFJJFRIFIFJFNV HE BRBRITHRIYHVYVGJRKRRKRKRKKRKRRKKRRJJEEJJWWHWHWHHWF CIFDSJNTKEEBEJFHRHDJC IN HI UNCONSCIOUSLY DJFJDJJEEN
D: OMG POOKIE CONGRATS :D MWA MW AMWMWMFGKRFIEJEEJ LETS MAKE OUT *mAkES OuT WItH saNfOrD!1!11!1!1!1!1!!*
Th e y m a k e. O u t
D: YOU SO HAWT YOU TASTE GOOD~~~~!!!1!1!1!11!!2!1!1
9-10 month later
D: HAI MY HAWT POOKIE SKIBIDI GYATT FANUM TAX POOKIE BEAR BIG BOOBA MM DADDY
S: wtf was that nickname
D: NOTHING LOL WAS SHOWING MY LOVE FOR YOU XD
S: OK MY HOT POOKIE BEAR-
D: I hungry
S: for what
D: bOoBaS!1!1!1!!11!11!11
S: OMG *flustered*
*makes out for 5 minutes*
S: HOLY FUCJTJDJFJDJFJVIJBDB SHIT MY WATER BROKE
D: DONT WORRY MY HAWT POOKIE BEAR MM DADY BIG BOOBAS YOUR DADDY DEIMOS HOT ALPHA SIGMA MALE WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU
(I’m not high)
2b: wtf why am I a doctor in this hospital I don’t even have a phd-
D: MY HAWT POOKIE BEAR HUSBANDS GIVIN BIRTH DOC
2B: tf was that nickname he is a grown ass grunt not your plaything pet.
H: … *just standing while giving off a deadpan look in the hospital ward*
D: THIS VIDEO WAS SPONSORED BY RAID SHADOW LEGENDS *rambles*
S: SIIDICIVOIVVISIDEHDBDJIVINDJFIRJRHRKFIFJFJFR
D: WHAT ARW YOU DOING PUSH IT OUT YOU FAT BISH
S: fijjfjrfififjvjdnfskjfiffjndnwjdidjwnrjrb
5 minutes later
H: *holding certificate that says: congrats it’s a uh baby and it’s yours ig*
2B: well uh congrats ig :/
S: EKCKCGJCNVNDKVVNDKKFJNFKGHGHDFHI DC I TV JGNKFKFOFFKJDNFFFIFIFFNNFJRJFJF OMG DEI THE BABY IS SO…
D: it’s so…
D: CUTW DIFJFFNIJERKJWIRIJJEBRD INCH
S: ITS A HOOK :D
2B: I regret even being in this stupid ass satire mpreg fanfiction
H: *holding sign* agreed lmao