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Jack knew things would change, knew that he had changed.
It had been just over two years since he walked out of the Phoenix to go hunt down Kovacs, since he left everyone. It had hurt every day he was gone, not only because he felt like he had betrayed them, but the fact of there being zero correspondence between them either. It was a security risk, completely understandable, but that didn’t stop Jack from sending things out to let everyone know he was alright, only from receiving anything.
It was his punishment, for leaving Riley again after promising he wouldn’t, for leaving Bozer without teaching him out to make his mother’s infamous pie, for leaving Mac—
Jack had swore he’d always be by Mac’s side no matter the situation, and he lied.
He tried to do right by everything else; getting Desi as his replacement, making sure any loose ends were tied, talking to Matty about what to do if he ended up not making it home.
Luckily, after one too many close calls, he was finally back home. Back in LA, back at the Phoenix, back with the people he called family.
The only thing was, things changed.
Sitting on one of the chairs in Mac’s backyard felt unfamiliar. The comfort that always seemed to be there was gone, and although he was sitting closely with everyone else, he couldn’t help but feel far away. It was obvious that they’d all become much closer in the years he was gone, especially with having Desi there in every day, comfortable clothing. They were laughing and smiling together, nudging and pushing like they used to do before.
Only Jack wasn’t truly apart of it.
He felt out of place. The spot he normally occupied was gone, filled by another. When he offered to do something, he was turned away, saying he could just sit and relax. It felt like no one needed him anymore.
He took a moment of everyone huddled around the grill to make an escape to the interior of the house. At least that was relatively stayed the same. A few gizmos and gadgets got moved around but it hadn’t changed that much.
Except for the fact that both Desi and Riley were living under that same roof. He didn’t know if he even wanted to know about that. He knew Mac and Desi had gotten close, but exactly how close was something he didn’t want to pry in.
He found the smaller guest room had been claimed by Riley, on account of all her well known items being strung about, and had assumed the larger one, the one that was unofficially labeled as his before he left, was occupied by Desi.
It hurt to think about it, that Mac had replaced him with someone else, but it was Jack’s own doing. He was the one that lied. He was the one that abandoned them. He had cut himself out of their lives and had no one to blame but himself.
“Jack?” Mac’s gentle tone had caught him off guard, making him jump slightly.
“Hey. What’s good?” Fake smile plastered onto his face.
“What are you— doing?”
“Oh, ya know, just lookin around at— stuff. Takin in all the— things… and stuff.”
“Are you alright?”
“Course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?”
Mac frowned slightly.
Jack should have just left. He shouldn’t be snooping around his best friend’s house— if he could even call Mac that anymore. He was just making more unwanted trouble.
“You know you can talk to me about anything, right? If something about the mission is bothering you, or having to readjust to civilian life—”
“It ain’t nothin like that.” Jack hadn’t meant to snap. He knew he didn’t have a right to. Nothing that he was experiencing was Mac’s fault.
“What is it then? You don’t— you don’t seem like you right now.”
Jack crossed his arms and looked anywhere but Mac’s face. “People change.”
Mac’s brow furrowed, trying to read the emotions on Jack’s face. “I know that. If I said anything to make you upset, I’m sorry. I don’t mean to. I’m just a bit confused. Did I do anything to offend you?”
“No, just—” He took a deep breath. “You and me— people change, man.”
Mac’s confusion only set harder on his face, trying to understand what Jack was trying to tell him without saying it outright. When a thought crosses his mind, guilt began to set in.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know.” Mac ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. “Go open up the main guest room.”
It was Jack’s turn to be hit with confusion. He sent Mac a look before slowly heading to the room, hesitating a moment before opening it. He didn’t know what he was expecting, but seeing all this stuff right where he left it wasn’t it. The only things that were different was new curtains, and the bed was made.
“What—?”
“I didn’t forget you, Jack.” Mac said, tone somber. “I could never.”
“You kept all this stuff in here?”
“Of course. It had to be ready for when you came back in case your apartment wasn’t.”
“I thought you woulda moved everythin to storage.”
“You always told me not to touch your stuff. This is the one time when I actually listened.” A small smile. “You always have a place here, no matter if we both changed or not.”
“But— no one was lettin me help with nothin. I thought…”
“We all know how difficult things can be after extended time away. We didn’t want you to feel overwhelmed, or like you needed to do something to be here. We’re all just happy your back. I’m sorry I didn’t notice sooner. I never want you to feel like you don’t belong here, and I’m certain very one would agree with me. We want you here with us, even though we’re terrible at communicating it apparently.”
And just like that, the warmth that had been missing outside on the chairs had come back. The doubt had been diminishing, and the love had been steadily flowing back through him.
“We really missed you, more than you could know.”
Jack sniffed and wiped his eyes. “I think I might have a little idea.”
“Just like old times; my house is your house. You belong here. You know that, right?”
“Yeah. Yeah, I do.” He took a deep breath and smiled. “You said I can talk to you bout anythin, right?”
“Of course.”
“You wanna let me in on where Desi’s been sleepin if this is still my room?”
Mac snorted and sling an arm around Jack’s shoulders. “There’s a lot for us to catch up on.”