Chapter Text
Chapter 1
Failure to Communicate
“No matter how far you go in life, eventually at one point, you always end right back at square one…”
The day after Zeynal’s unexpected visit, there was a brand new anxious feeling in the air. None of them were eager to leave Roman that night, so with some added bribing of the nurse's station and security, they all spent the night in his room, including Gerri. For quite a while they all just sat there, in a very unsettling quiet. Trying to process what had just happened. It was very clear he was telling them all this was far from over and they were never going to truly be safe. By the way Zeynal made eye contact with everyone, it was no longer just Roman who was in danger. They all seemed to be fair game. Maybe not so much Connor or Shiv, but even still. None of them were about to take any chances.
They began brainstorming once Roman fell asleep. The first issue being where he was going to go when he was finally discharged. Going back home seemed out of the question, since Zeynal made it crystal clear that he’d have his men constantly watching. There was no way he’d be safe there. Gerri had offered her place as a possibility. Her condo had a doorman and security and because Zeynal most likely wasn’t aware of the extent of their relationship, he wouldn’t suspect that Roman would be staying with her. Plus, her whereabouts weren’t as common knowledge as Kendall’s, which was also another possibility. Add to that, the fact that Ken had two children who also occasionally stayed with him, his place was quickly crossed off the list.
As much as Shiv would’ve liked to offer Roman a room at her place, she wasn’t sure how Tom would feel. Plus, she wasn’t even absolutely sure she could trust her husband, which was heartbreaking to think about. Besides, Roman would rather poke his eyes out with a spork then have to deal with Tom and Greg. Because where there was one, the other was never far behind.
Of course, Connor offered his place as well, but he was currently living in a hotel. The plus to that was the added security. The minus was how easy it might be to get past those people and up to his floor.
They went back and forth about it for much of the night, before finally deciding to go with Gerri’s place. At least that was one thing they could scratch off of their very long to do list.
The next issue was security. It was clear that they needed to hire their own people to keep watch over all of them, but especially Roman. Ken said that Stewy most likely would be able to hook them up with a good company. He’d put in a call tomorrow.
They also doubled down on their pact to not ever leave Roman alone. It was probably a good idea if they all knew each other’s whereabouts, but Roman was the number one focus. Getting him better and keeping him safe was the main goal.
By the time they all finally conked out, at least they had a semi plan in place.
~ ~ ~
The next morning, they were abruptly woken up by a loud, “Was there a party I wasn’t invited to last night?”
All their heads jutted up at once when they heard Logan’s booming voice. Gerri had fallen asleep on Roman’s chest, and he had his arm on her back. When she sat up she took note at the glare she was receiving from her ex-boss and quickly moved off the bed and ran her hand through her messed up hair.
“What the fuck, dad!” Shiv said sitting up on the cot and stretching. “Why the hell are you screaming?”
“What’s going on? Why are you all in here?” He asked as Kerry moved right beside him.
Ken and Connor spent the night on chairs, so they were up and stretching. “Zeynal came by last night.” Kendall said.
“I heard.”
They were all surprised by his answer.
“You knew?” Shiv asked.
“He told me.”
“Wait, what?” The siblings all looked at one another perplexed.
“Are you two best buddies now or something?” Kendall asked just as Roman groaned and opened his eyes.
Logan ignored them all and walked over to his son, practically pushing Gerri to the side as he placed his hand on top of Roman’s “Hey Tumbledown. How are you feeling?”
Roman opened and closed his eyes a few times before answering. “Ad.” he said.
Logan looked to the others for help. He still wasn’t able to decipher anything his son was telling him.
“He said bad.” Gerri said.
“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that son, but at least I have some good news for you. I talked to Dr. Schafer this morning and he said that you’re going home today. What do you think about that?”
Before the visit from Zeynal, Roman was really looking forward to getting out of the hospital and back to his own bed. He hadn’t been in his own bed in such a long time, he had forgotten what it was like. Now even though he was happy to be getting out of the hospital, he was also feeling a little anxious. He was hoping that Gerri would volunteer to stay with him. Roman meant to nod, but instead shrugged.
“What? You don’t want to leave this place?” Logan was absolutely smiley and chipper which was so unlike him, the kids didn’t exactly know what the hell was going on. “Look at this kid, Kerry! He actually enjoys being here.” Kerry was laughing right along.
“I think he’s just a little scared, you know the guy who almost killed him threatened him last night so….it kind of put a damper on things.” Shiv said dripping sarcasm.
“Roman, you have nothing to worry about. Colin is going to take good care of you. Plus, there’s so much security at my place. Noone would ever get in.”
“What are you talking about?” Ken asked.
Logan turned his head to speak to the rest of his children, “He’s going to be perfectly safe with me.”
“What do you mean with you?”
“Obviously he’s going to come stay with me. The doctor made it clear he can’t live alone.”
“Right, but we think it makes more sense for him to stay with Gerri.” Ken said.
Gerri nervously bit her bottom lip. “Really? And what exactly is Gerri going to do to protect your brother?” He was acting as if she wasn’t even in the room.
“We just felt like, my place would be the least likely place for Zeynal to find Roman.” She answered. “Plus, I live on the first floor, and we also have a really good security system in place.”
“Oh, well I guess my son will be safe and sound with you and your Ring system or whatever the fuck it is. No, he’s coming home with me. I’ve already arranged it all.”
“Dad. What the hell?” Shiv started but was quickly interrupted by a wave of Logan’s hand as he turned back towards Roman speaking to him as if no one else was in the room.
“I arranged to have the best physical, occupational and speech therapists to work with you every day. We bought all the equipment you will need. Plus, we also hired an overnight nurse, so you’ll always have someone on hand to help you out.” He placed his hand over Roman’s and gave him a smile.
Roman looked down at his father’s hand and then into his eyes. His expression hard to read. His mouth was moving trying to form a word but before he was able to get anything out, Kendall spoke.
“Are you going to let Gerri go and see him? Or is this you trying to keep her as far away from him as possible?”
“Ken don’t…” Shiv started.
“No, I’m just curious.”
Gerri was just standing there, so many emotions hitting her at once, she really didn’t have a clue what she wanted to say.
Logan rolled his eyes and turned to his son, “Not that it’s any your business, but that’ll be between Gerri and me. We’ll have a discussion.”
At that, Roman looked over at Gerri. He looked anxious, his eyes wide. She took that as a sign to say something, anything to get him out of this situation.
“Logan, I really feel like having Roman stay with me would make the most sense. I would gladly cater to anything he might need, and I think that’s what he would want.”
“Well, right now he’s not capable of making those types of decisions, so as his father, I’m making that call.”
“Isn’t that convenient, playing dad when it suits you.”
As Logan turned to confront Kendall, and Shiv moved closer to them both, Roman looked at Gerri again. Seeing his look of distress, she walked over to him but stopped just shy of sitting on the bed, Logan being the reason why. “Don’t worry, I’ll get him to change his mind. You need to come and stay with me. That’s what we all decided while you were sleeping.”
He gave a very quick half smile as she nodded at him and made her way over to Logan. “Can we have a minute.” She said, tapping his shoulder.
He looked annoyed but he nodded and the two of them walked out of the room.
“I can’t believe that asshole! He barely shows his face the whole time Rome’s comatose, and now he’s all super dad!”
“He’s ridiculous. You know it’s so Gerri can’t be with him.”
As the two of them were speaking in the corner, Roman locked eyes with Connor who had been a silent observer this entire time.
~ ~ ~
I wish I could explain what this feels like. The inability to express what I want to say. It’s right here in my mind and at the very tip of my tongue. When I try to speak, the words just won’t come. I know them, I understand them but yet, nothing. It’s like my mouth and my brain are in a constant battle with each other.
My father telling me he wants me to stay with him. It’s hard to believe, really. The fact that he took the time to arrange all of those things just for me. First, he called a truce with Ken and helped me escape and now he wants to be a part of my recovery. I’m flattered, but I don’t want to stay with him. I want to go home to my own place. I haven’t been there in such a long time. I miss my bed. I miss taking off my shoes and throwing them in the corner, grabbing a drink from the fridge and just sitting on my couch and watching something stupid on TV. I miss having quiet time with Gerri. Sometimes her head on my lap, but most of the time it’s the other way around.
It seems like even though for my sake, dad was willing to accept our relationship, he isn’t keen on the two of us spending time together. At least if I’m hearing things correctly. That seems to be what Kendall just said.
Kendall and dad don’t really seem to get along at all. What the fuck is up with that? I thought they were working together again.
And now Gerri telling my dad how they all decided that I should be staying at Gerri’s place. What the fuck? Why are they all making these decisions about me without me? Shouldn’t it be up to me where I fucking live?
Did my father just say I can’t make my own fucking decisions?
I want to yell at them all to just shut the fuck up for a minute! But I can’t do it. I look over at Gerri for help. Maybe she’d be able to figure out what I want to say. When she walks over, I get excited, but then she stops. By the way she casts my father a look, I can tell she’s afraid to talk about the two of us together. But for my sake, I know she will.
After she tells me she’s going to talk to him and double down on me staying with her, I honestly don’t know where else to turn. Then I hear my brother and sister, clear as a bell talking about how dad didn’t even come to visit me while I was asleep. It hits me hard. I had visions of him sitting by my side and holding my hand. Staying until all hours of the night until I awoke. But it turns out, that wasn’t correct at all. I mean I should have figured it out. After I woke, he rarely came to see me. Gerri and my siblings would tell me “Oh, you just missed dad. He was here a minute ago.” And I stupidly believed them.
I’m really sad now. Sad, anxious and mad, but mostly frustrated. Then I feel a pair of eyes on me. I glance over at Connor. He has a look of understanding on his face. It’s like he realizes that because I have ears, I can hear everything Shiv and Ken are talking about. He can tell the news is upsetting me as he makes his way over.
“Guys how about you knock it off, yeah?” He says to them. Then using his head, he motions to me.
Thankfully they stop. Connor looks at me again, “What do you want to say Rome?” He asks.
“It’s my decision! Not anyone else. I want to go back to my place. Dad can hire whoever the hell he wants but they can come to me!” That’s what I want to say, I’m trying my hardest to move my mouth to make those words come out, but all I manage is a “Oh!”
“No?” He asks.
I have to stop and think for a second. Up and down. I want my head to go up and down, but it does neither. I start nervously moving my fingers. For some reason, that seems to help me process things.
He sees me moving them and places his hand over one of mine, making it stop.
“It’s okay, Rome…calm down. Everything will be okay. Gerri is really convincing. She’ll get him to agree for you to stay with her.”
“Oh!” I say as loud as I can.
“No what?”
“Oh! Oh! Oh!”
By now both Shiv and Ken have moved their way back towards me and are watching.
“No what? You don’t want to stay at Gerri’s?” Shiv asks.
Up and down Roman. Up and down! This time I’m successful. This confuses all three of them. “So, you do want to stay with dad then?” Kendall asks.
“Oh! Fuck!”
I’m so frustrated, I just want to scream.
“Romey, relax…take a deep breath. Remember what your doctor said. Just take a deep breath and try again.” Connor says in a nice calming voice.
I close my eyes and try to do what my doctor suggested. Picture the words in my mind. Try to find the correct one and then just do my best to try to communicate my feelings. I take a few deep breaths, “I want to go home. To My home…” I say it a few times in my head. I open my eyes and manage to point to myself.
“Ome…”
“Home?” Shiv asks.
I smile, they’re finally getting it, “es!”
“You are getting to leave tomorrow.”
“Fuck!” I answer in frustration. I point to myself again, this time actually hitting my chest like I’m fucking Tarzan or something. “Ome!”
“I think he wants to go to his own place.” Connor says.
“Es!” I say as I grab at his hand, “Es! Ome.”
~ ~ ~
Gerri and Logan just stood in silence for a minute. Kerry of course followed and was standing off to the side, but still well within listening distance.
“Logan, I need to be with Roman all the time.”
“That’s not necessary. He’s going to have the best people watching over him.”
“It has nothing to do with that.”
“You’ll just distract him from what he needs to do.”
“Or I’ll be the best encouragement for what he needs to do. Just like Marcia was for you.”
“That was different.”
“No, it wasn’t. You told me yourself; you did much better with your physical therapy when Marcia was there with you than when you did it without her.”
“Marcia is my wife.”
She found herself looking at Kerry, before her eyes went back to Logan, “It doesn’t matter. At the time, she was your main support system. Just like Kerry is now. If something bad were to happen to you, God forbid of course. It’s Kerry who you’d want.”
“We aren’t talking about me.”
“But we could very easily be talking about you.”
“I’m not banning you from seeing my son. You are more than welcome to visit between sessions, just like his siblings or any of his other friends.”
“You know perfectly well the two of us are more than friends.”
“So, what exactly are you asking? You want to move in too? Should a get a queen-sized hospital bed so you can fuck whenever you want?”
“Logan!”
“No, I think it’s a great idea…” Then he turned towards Kerry, “Hey Kerry, let’s get a queen-sized bed so my son and his ancient girlfriend can fuck whenever they want, under my roof.”
“Don’t you think we should do what Roman wants?”
“He’s not capable of making his own decisions right now.”
“Why?”
“Because he’s ill. He is suffering from a brain injury, Gerri. He can’t even say one fucking word correctly, so no, he’s not capable of making this decision on his own.”
“And you think he’d really pick staying with you and not staying with me?”
“To be honest, I don’t fucking care. It’s not a competition. He’s my son.”
“He’s been your son this whole time.”
“And what is that supposed to mean?”
“Why didn’t you tell the FBI about you and Zeynal? Your call.” Logan seemed taken by surprise at this question. “When they came to visit us yesterday, they said that they cleared him of any wrongdoing because there was no evidence he was involved.”
“They told me that too.”
“It’s hard to believe that even after you told them about your actual call with him, they’d still think that way.”
“He didn’t really say anything that would have incriminated himself.”
“Really? That entire call? Not once did he mention Roman’s name? I mean the fact that you talked at all should have been enough for them to do something.”
“What are you suggesting?”
“What did he say to get you to remain quiet?”
“Gerri, do not go down this path.”
She wasn’t about to stop. Anger filling every single pore of her body was flowing in this man’s direction now. As far as she was concerned, he was to blame for everything. “He threatened you with something to keep you quiet. I want to know what it was.”
“Fuck off.”
Kerry trying to break up the tension moved forward, “Logan, you have your meeting in about ten minutes. We should really get going.”
He looked as if he was about to scream, but instead he rubbed his face and took a deep breath before turning back towards Gerri. “I know for a fact, that Roman will be safe with me. But if you don’t care about that and want him all to yourself, then go right on ahead and bring him home. I don’t fucking care.”
They both walked away from her without looking back.
~ ~ ~
The arguing was so loud that all of them heard just about every word being said. Every time Roman heard his father say that he wasn’t capable of making his own decisions made him actually wince as if he was being punched in the face. The siblings had no idea what to do. It was clear that the shouting was bothering their brother, but none of them were eager to go out there and try to break it up.
Finally, the fighting stopped. Shortly after, Gerri came walking back into the room, looking flustered.
She looked over at her boyfriend and smiled, “That didn’t sound like it went very well.” Kendall said to her as she walked over towards Roman.
“You know how stubborn your father is, but in the end, he did say you can come with me.” She said this to Roman as she extended her hands to him.
She was surprised when he didn’t reach out to her but instead his chest and said, “Om!”
“Yes, I’m bringing you home. You don’t have to go home with your dad anymore.”
He had a look on his face. She wasn’t exactly sure what happened, but he looked angry. “What’s wrong?”
Roman was moving his head all over the place, somewhere between and nod and a shake while moving his lips. “Fuck!” He said and then looked over to his brother, “Con!”
Gerri looked over at Connor, “Roman doesn’t want to go home with you either, Gerri.”
She was slightly thrown off by this. “Is that true?” She turned to ask Roman.
He took a few deep breaths and closed his eyes, he seemed really agitated and she couldn’t help but wonder what the hell happened in the little time she left them all. When he opened his eyes a few seconds later, he hit his chest again, “I ome.”
“He wants to go to his own place.” Connor translated for him.
“Oh, you don’t want to come home with me?” She asked, sounding like a little wounded animal.
“Oh…” He said.
Her heart fell and she took a few steps back from his bed, “Oh, okay. I’m sorry…I thought you’d want to…”
Suddenly she felt so self-conscious as they all stared at her.
“Kerri….oh!” Roman said pretty loudly.
She translated that as “Gerri, go!” She gave him a small smile, “Okay…I’m sorry I upset you.” She looked at them all and then made her way to the door. She had to get out of there before she started bawling.
“NO Gerri! Don’t go! I want you to stay! Please. I’m not mad at you! I just want to be in my own bed. I want you with me! Where are you going? Why aren’t they stopping you? I need you. Please don’t leave!
But all that managed to come out was, “Kerri…oh! Oh! Oh!”
As she walked out the door.