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The Slashing

Summary:

As Squidward and Spongebob work the night shift, an unexpected killer enters the Krusty Krab, trying to kill whoever he can. Will Spongebob and Squidward survive?

Notes:

This is a "what-if" fic that I wanted to write for a while now, and since it's Spooky Month, I thought now would be a good time to do so. IT's basically just "What if the Hash-Slinging-Slasher was an actual murderer?"

I hope you guys enjoy!

Work Text:

“I didn’t know the buses ran this late,” Spongebob said with an excited tone.

“They don’t,” Squidward’s heart dropped into his stomach as the bus drove away and the fog settled, revealing the alleged Hash Slinging Slasher that Squidward thought he had fabricated earlier. As the shadowy figure stood on the other side of the street, Squidward’s heart sank lower. The figure walked toward the Krusty Krab, crossing the street without looking both ways. With a slow raising of his arm, the Hash Slinging Slasher revealed the rusty spatula he had for a hand.

As the Slasher tapped his spatula hand against the glass door of the restaurant, Squidward let out a scream of pure terror. His heart was pounding out of his chest and it only got worse when the Slasher opened the door with a squealing sound. He walked toward Spongebob and Squidward, the floorboards creaking under him with every step.

He approached the counter and raised his spatula hand into the air, then split the cash register in half. Squidward and Spongebob screamed and ran away into the bathroom. They hid in the stall at the very end of the room and locked the door, jumping up onto the toilet. When the Slasher entered the bathroom, the door slammed into the wall with a loud thud, startling Spongebob and Squidward. The stall doors slammed open as the Slasher made his way to the end of the room.

As he made it to the last door, the ringing sound from the doors of the Krusty Krab opening caught the attention of the Slasher and he went to investigate, leaving Spongebob and Squidward in the stall. They slowly opened the door to the stall, just in time to see the Slasher walk out of the bathroom. Spongebob shakily stood up off the toilet and walked out of the stall.

“What are we gonna do now?” Spongebob asked. “There could be a helpless customer out there alone with the Slasher.”

“I don’t know, but we have to come up with a plan quickly,” Squidward said.

Meanwhile, out in the dining area, a customer had walked into the restaurant, the Slasher hiding in the shadowy corner of the room. The customer stood at the counter, looking up at the menu trying to decide what to order while the Slasher looked for the perfect time to make his move.

“Hello? Anyone here?” The customer shouted. “I’d like to order my food. I got money,” The customer shouted again. Spongebob and Squidward were still trying to come up with a plan. They knew that if they went out there, they would just be chopped up by the Slasher.

“There’s really nothing we can do, Spongebob. The Slasher is too bloodthirsty, he’ll kill on sight.”

“I know, Squidward… But we can’t just let that guy die,” Spongebob said.

Back at the counter, the customer was getting impatient.

“Well, if you’re not gonna come out and take my order, I’ll just take my money and leave!” The customer yelled as he walked toward the exit. This was the perfect time for the Slasher to act, so he emerged from the corner of the room and began to run toward the customer, his spatula hand raised in the air, ready to strike. The customer turned around and yelped. But as he approached the customer, a strange whistling sound stopped the Slasher dead in his tracks. It sounded like it was coming from above.

As the whistling sound got louder and louder, the customer and the Slasher looked up, and before he could do anything, Mr. Krabs came crashing down onto the Slasher, crushing him beneath his body.

“You say you have money to spend?” Mr. Krabs said to the customer with a smile on his face.

“Yeah. Here it-” Before the customer could finish what he was going to say, Krabs took the money out of his hand and went over to what used to be the cash register. Spongebob and Squidward came out of the bathroom to see the flattened body of the Slasher on the ground. They both thanked Mr. Krabs for saving their lives.

“I don’t know what the two of you are on about, but where in the barnacles is the cash register?” Krabs shouted.

“Uh, yeah, about that,” Squidward said, then went on to explain the whole situation.

“Oh…” Mr. Krabs said. “Well at least you’re both safe. I can’t afford to lose the best two employees I have!” Krabs said.

“Sir, we’re you’re only two employees,” Spongebob said.

“I know!” Mr. Krabs chuckled. “Which is why you two are gonna have to buy me a new register!” He chuckled some more, Spongebob and Squidward joining in.

“Good one, Mr. Krabs,” Spongebob said.

“No, I’m being serious,” Krabs said as he stopped laughing. “Get on it.”